A/N: This is it! This is the last chapter of Letting Go! Thank you so much to everyone that stuck with me, I know this hasn't been the easiest story to read and I know I wasn't so good about updating weekly. Now that I'm done with this one I'm working on another fic that I can hopefully start publishing in a few weeks.
Anyways, this last chapter skips ahead a few months from March to September. Enjoy!
September 4
It's been a year. Today marks a year since I got that phone call. A year since my world and my life got flipped upside down. A year since the love of my life left me. This has by far been the hardest, worst goddamn year of my life. There's no denying that. I figured it out. That it doesn't get any easier, I mean. Being without you, it's still the hardest thing I've ever had to go through and it probably always will be. I was so in love with you. I still am. Is it possible to be in love with someone who's gone? I don't know. I don't know where I'm going now. I graduated a little over three months ago, like you know. You should've been there with me, you should've been walking across that stage getting your diploma too. We should be settling down in New York by now, making out on an uncomfortable couch in our tiny shoebox apartment. But we're not. We never will be. My parents are moving to California, did I tell you that? They're tired of Ohio, they said. They wanna be closer to Cooper and they asked me if I wanted to go with them. Maybe I will. I don't know. I still don't know what to do. I haven't know what to do for a year. I want to go to college, I know that. But I don't know what to major in and I don't know where to go. There's so much I still have to figure out, because I don't have it all figured out like I did before. Before, I knew. I knew I was going with you to New York and I knew we were going to apply for NYADA, and I knew you were going to get in. I was hopeful that I would too, but I still had NYU as an option just in case. I still have the application around somewhere. And there's so much that I still don't know, but one thing I do know is that I'm not going to New York. I can't. New York and NYADA and a tiny shoebox apartment in the middle of the city were our dreams. Things we were supposed to do together. But now there's no we, there's only I and there's no us, there's only me. And I'm not doing that without you. I can't. It'll hurt too much. It still hurts. It hurts every fucking day and I don't think it will ever stop. Maybe eventually it'll just be a little ache in my heart, but as of right now it's not. It's still the most pain I've ever had and I don't think that's gonna change anytime soon. Anyways, all I really want is to be out of Ohio. I want to go to college and I want to graduate and get a job. Maybe I'll meet someone new, maybe I won't. But I want you to know that I'll never love another man a fraction as much as I loved you. Never in a million years. And if I do meet someone, there'll be days when I wish he were you and I'll wish I was holding you and kissing you and loving you. I'll never stop missing you, Kurt Hummel. But I'm letting you go; I have to let you go. I love you, I love you so fucking much. I'll never stop. I'm not saying goodbye, because we promised we'd never say goodbye. But I have to let you go.