As usual, I own none of the characters portrayed in this chapter. Those would belong to the marvelous Mrs. Meyer and associates.

Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor.
`Wretch,' I cried, `thy God hath lent thee - by these angels he has sent thee
Respite - respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore!
Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this lost Lenore!'

-The Raven, Edgar Allen Poe

Undead

I could almost taste the shock on the back of my tongue, congealing time to a near halt.

Time is quite an interesting subject.

I had learned too long ago that it is no friend of mine, meant for the sole purpose of dragging out the eternity I have at my disposal. As for the nature of time, it seems that there is only one thing that can be generally agreed upon.

There is either not enough of it, or too much.

Time is relative.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I was deeply and horribly aware of the fact that this train of thought had only sprung up to protect me from thinking about the moment at hand.

In this moment, time became thick, unbearably concrete...As frozen as I myself. Eons stretched out, universes were born and new suns aged into supernovas within the time span of that sprung up and were wiped out, art forms were invented, and eternity revealed its entirety to me within the span of the moment in which I was trapped. There was nothing, yet everything. Worlds collided in my head, and I remained cool, calm, and….

Unresponsive.

"Edward?" Came a patient voice through the many layers that clouded my consciousness, not quite hiding the deep apprehension that stirred below.

I couldn't answer; Alice wouldn't be able to hear me through the personal chaos I inhabited.

"…Edward, did you hear me?"

Of course. Another universe collapsed in on itself.

"…Ed, please say something." She begged quietly

It was all over. Finished. There was nothing left. No thought. No feeling. Not even me.

Not even Bella.

I heard a crack; the shell of my phone had split down the cheaply-made plastic backing. I had been gripping it too hard.

And then there was the pain. How could I be in pain when I didn't exist? But that's all there was. White hot and angry, it throbbed to every particle of my being, searing me in timeless agony.

I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't stay away. The hole left by lost love throbbed as if it were trying to re-create the heartbeat that I had been missing for so long. How appropriate, how ironic, as if I had no heart. A dead heart. Cold, lifeless, and always, always how it had been destined to remain. I couldn't see. I couldn't think.

There was too much.

There was not enough.

I deserved it. I deserved more. Oh, God. Oh, hell.

Oh, Bella.

Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella

I gasped out loud.

And then…I was awake.
Truly awake.

For the first time in months, for the first time since I had…Left, what I knew I had to do became as clear as a glass pond.

"Alice!" The word dragged, deranged and sharp, from my mouth.

"Edward!" She squeaked, her voice scared and half-crazed at my unexplainable behavior

How could I have let myself stay here, week after week? How could I have been so irresponsible, so selfish, to not see what I had to do? I was furious with myself, how had I let myself mope when there were so many more important things to attend to?

A plan sprung into my head, already refined as if I had been planning it all along.

I heard Alice hiss as my future was set in stone.

I smiled to myself, feeling the crazed look that must have been all-too apparent on my face. What did I care? There was no more need to look human, no need to look like anything besides what I was.

A killer.

"No. No way." Her tone was flat."Edward, don't do it. Bring me with. Bring Emmett. Bring Jasper."

She could see as well as I that that was not going to happen. The desperation quickly escalating in her voice betrayed what she tried her best to hide.

"Don't do this by yourself. Don't do this to yourself."

"I've already done this to myself."

"Dammit, Edward! Can't you see what you're doing? Can't you see-"

"Guilt has nothing to do with it." I growled. "Even if-I mean, no matter the circumstances, you know I would have to do this anyways."

"But not alone. Don't underestimate her because you're trying to commit some sick sort of penance to punish yourself for love!"

The maniacal grin on my face receded as my plan solidified, as I grabbed a hold of myself, willing myself to ignore rationality, embracing purpose for what felt like the first time.

Fully alive for the first time. A smile born of contempt quickly flashed across my face. Well, at least fully undead.

As of now, I had a new purpose. As of now, the burning resolve, the reckless, dangerous anger which was the only small antidote to any amount of pain consumed me.

"I won't. I'm not. Alice, she will die."

I repeated myself, the conviction strengthening in my near-unused voice.

"Victoria will die."

There was a moment of silence on the line. She could see the scattered threads of my future as they suddenly found direction. A deep breath shuddered through her windpipe as she saw that nothing she did would change my mind."…There's no way I can convince you, is there?"

"No." The conviction in my voice was unwavering.

She considered for a moment, searching other options, seeking alternatives…She must have already known that she could not, would not, sway me. With a sigh, she relinquished: "Fine."

I snapped the phone shut and dropped it into my pocket before I took off into the suddenly chaotic forest, pulled into an uproar by the suddenly activated instincts of a predator.

Victoria would not live to see many more sunsets. Her days were numbered.

I was hunting to kill.