Disclaimer: I do NOT own the following wrestlers, or any of the events that actually happened on camera.

I respect the actual beliefs and sexualities of the following wrestlers.

Thanks for the reviews, everyone.

Well, here's part twenty-one.

"Why?" Chris looked at Matt, eyes streaked with tears, on his knees. "Why couldn't you just leave me alone? Why did you have to keep pushing?"

Chris wanted to answer, but he couldn't say a word. It was as if his vocal cords were gone and all he could do was watch as Matt cried. "Why did you have to ruin my life?"

Someone touched Matt's shoulder, and he looked up. There was Adam, smiling softly. "Come, love."

"No," he said, "I don't... I just want to be alone. Leave me alone!"

Adam grabbed Matt's arm and yanked him up. "It'll be fine. I'll protect you. I'll love you."

"Please..."

Adam slapped Matt hard across the face. Matt just looked down, tears spilling. "You have no idea what you want. I do. I know you. I love you. Come on, love." He began pulling Matt away into the darkness, and Matt glanced back at Chris.

"Why did you ruin my life?"

Finally, Chris could speak, but it didn't matter. No one could hear it. "Sorry..."

************

Chris sat up. He never screamed at the end of his dreams, never made a noise. One last 'sorry' died on his lips and he brought his hands up to wipe his sweat. But one of his hands didn't go up.

Chris looked down. His and Matt's fingers were intertwined. Matt wasn't with Adam, wasn't crying... he was sleeping, and he looked pretty peaceful. Chris carefully untangled his hand and smiled at Matt; somehow, seeing him made waking up easier.

He walked to the mirror and began cleaning the gunk from his eyes. Suddenly, he heard someone say, "I thought we agreed you wouldn't trace your wounds anymore." Chris turned around and saw Matt's eyes open.

"I didn't mean to wake you," he said quietly.

"It's fine," Matt answered, "Once again... I thought you said you wouldn't trace your bruises anymore."

"I wasn't." Chris went back to the bed and sat next to Matt. "I promised, didn't I? And I'm a man of my word."

"Whatever." Matt pushed him.

Chris smiled and grabbed the food Mark got him last night. After he and Matt talked, it just felt natural to lay there and do nothing... the food lay forgotten. Chris began eating the cold food, not caring about the temperature, only caring that Matt was broken.

Chris still blamed himself a little, but that didn't matter. His wave of self pity and hate didn't matter. All that mattered was that Matt was riding a similar wave, and he was going to pull him off. And maybe he could find redemption in healing Matt.

Matt grabbed his food and looked at Chris' face. He memorized each wound he made, and promised himself he would make amends for them. And each one Adam made. And each one Punk, or Jeff, or anyone else made on his behalf. Did he really do all that?

They ate in silence. Once they were both done, Chris said, "I have a confession to make."

Matt looked at him, confused. "What is it?"

"I..." Chris swallowed. "After... after the threesome, Adam kicked me out. He told me a bunch of things about how you were his, and that I could never have you. And then I said something incredibly stupid."

"Let me be the judge of that," Matt said.

"I told him one day you'd see who he was, and then you'd leave him. And then... I told him that... I'd marry you. And then I began, well, for lack of better word, stalking you."

Matt stared at him and then he laughed. Chris' eyes widened; he definitely didn't expect this reaction. Matt laughed so hard he began crying. He kept laughing and laughing... until he began coughing

Chris ran over and wrapped his arms around him. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean..."

"You're such a cocky assclown!" Matt cried out happily. But there was something else in there. As funny as he found Chris' bold declaration, he was stuck on Adam's words. That he belonged to him. That was who Adam was all this time?

Chris pulled away and looked at him. He grinned and said, "You look your best when you're laughing. I'm glad I was able to make you laugh."

"How could I not?" Matt said, wiping his tears, "You're such an idiot."

"Why did you ruin my life?"

Chris shook his head, blocking out the sound. He had to be stable enough to help Matt. And if his head was elsewhere, he couldn't help Matt. "Let's see what's on TV."

***********

"I'm telling you, I can't do this. I don't know how," Mark said into the phone.

"Trust me!" Jeff sighed. "Go sit by your laptop and watch the screen." Mark did as he was told, and Jeff said, "Now, wait."

A window popped up. Jeffrey N. Hardy wants to videochat with you. Accept?

"Press yes." Mark did as he was told, and now he could see Jeff and Punk sitting in another hotel room. "Now, was that so hard?"

"Bite me," Mark snapped. It wasn't his fault he wasn't computer literate. He came from a different time. And he refused to change with the changing times.

"So..." Punk asked, "How are they?"

"They talk every now and again, but mostly, they're just quiet together, watching the TV." Mark said.

"Is it healthy to be a statue?" Punk asked.

"No." Jeff looked at him. "You have to get them to go outside, babe. Make them rejoin the world."

"What if they're not ready for that?" Mark asked.

"Remember when you taught Brian how to swim when we were all at Dave's pool?" Mark grinned at the memory.

"Just threw him in, and let survival instinct take over."

"Exactly. Just throw them into the deep end. They'll swim to shore."

"End the swimming analogy!" Punk shouted. They all laughed, and he said, "So... can we talk to them?"

Mark nodded. "Give me a moment." He went to the other room and saw that Chris was asleep, and Matt was rubbing his head.

"I wish he'd stop saying sorry," Matt said.

Mark nodded and walked into the other room. As he closed the door, he heard Chris say sorry. He went back to the computer. "Not yet," Mark said, "But soon."

*************

Matt didn't want to go to sleep. He didn't want to have another dream... and he didn't want to leave Chris alone. It seemed that whatever Chris was dreaming about, it was haunting him, just like Matt's dreams haunted him.

He shook Chris awake after hearing another sorry. "Wha?" he said, sounding out of it.

"Please stop blaming yourself," Matt urged, "Please... everytime I hear you say sorry, I feel worse and worse."

"Then I'll stop saying it," Chris said. "I don't want you to ever feel that out of control ever again, that you'd want to cut off your hair. I want you to be okay again."

"I don't know if I can be," Matt said, "I... I loved him, Chris."

"Are you sure you loved him?" Chris asked, "Or is it... that you love him?" Matt looked down.

"You think I'm pathetic for loving him still."

Chris shook his head. "I think you're human. And you and Adam have a long history. I would be more worried if you were able to just cut him out of your heart. You... feelings like that don't just die, no matter how much we wish they could."

"I want it just to go away," Matt said, "I want him to go away. But he's still here, even though I know he's in jail... he's still-" He pushed his finger into his chest, right over his heart. "-in-" He did it again, more emphatically. "-here."

Chris grabbed Matt's hand and pulled it away from him. "I understand, Matt. And it's okay. You will get through this. You have to get through this. If one of us has to... you do."

Matt shook his head. "You have to get better, Chris." He pulled Chris into his arms and squeezed him. "Get better, please."

Chris rest his head on Matt's shoulder. "We're going to make it out of this bullshit, right?"

"Hopefully."

Reviews deeply appreciated