Title: with benefits?
Summary: Death the Kid really hated female logic...a lot.
Pairing(S): KidEruka
Length: 581…xD What the hell happened? xD
Author: Pippin's Sock's.
Notes: I love making complete crack couples sound relatively plausible.

"I think you're hot."

"What?"

"No, really. I mean…phwoar."

Kid blinked once, twice, and made a very big show of moving the glass the young lady was drinking out of further away from her.

"We should hook up."

"No. No we shouldn't" the poor Shinigami reasoned, for once in his life the voice of rationality.

"We should!" she insisted, spinning on the bar stool she was sat on, leaning far too close, their elbows rubbing together as she spoke.

"I'll humour you…" the soon to be Shinigami-without-annoying-Kid-tagged-onto-the-end mused, hoping that if he at least pretended to be interested the crazy witch, frog, woman, thing would leave him alone, "Why?"

"Because, you're hot" he gave the woman a very dry stare, failing not to look as smug as he actually felt.

"Do you do this to all the men you meet in bars?" she giggled, playing with the olive at the bottom of his glass.

"No. Well, yes but hey…if you want something, why wait?"

"That's dangerous reasoning."

"I like danger," she cooed, flicking a stray strand of hair off his jacket, restoring it to its perfectly symmetrical glory.

"If I recall correctly…" he drawled, allowing a brief smirk of sadism that Fraken Stein himself would be proud of, to grace his lips, "you were the one in hysterics at the Kisshin revival."

Her smile dissolved into a pout, she haughtily spun round, nose in the air, before adding "you were the one who freaked out over a statue."

"Touche."

"So…?"

"No." She was back to facing him within seconds, a look of pure melodramatic agony on her features.

"But…we're both so well dressed!"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well…" she began, helping herself to a sip of the drink he hadn't actually touched all evening, not that it made any difference anyway, "Soul and Maka are like the most aggressive right?" Kid nodded, albeit reluctantly, "and Tsubaki and Black Star and the most paradox right?" another slow and indisposed jerk of the head, "So clearly we need to get together to, being the best dressed here."

She nodded in agreement with herself; Kid decided he loathed female logic.

"That…well…you and I…" Kid floundered, not liking the self-satisfied smirk that was slowly making its way across her features, "I can't" stressed the poor boy "chichiue would…ruin my hair!" he gestured to the now fully aligned sanzu lines, he'd celebrated for about 2 months and far more memorably during a life and death battle with Noah when the epic occasion finally occurred.

Fully symmetrical at last…

"We'd match more! My hair's blue!" he was about to ask how that made any plausible sense when she ploughed on, "and your eyes match my hat, we both love explosions and our outfits even colour coordinate!" She nodded her head enthusiastically.

"Aren't opposites supposed to attract?" Kid mused.

"Tch, are you saying you and Medusa should go out?" his eyes bulged out his head slightly at the thought, before he allowed a small chuckle to escape his lips.

"Plus this is what a friend would do!"

"We aren't friends-"

"Something more?"

"No!"

"In between?"

"What on earth does that-mmph" Even through her slightly alcohol induced romance Eruka was a decent kisser and for someone taken by surprise Kid certainly knew what he was doing, though the poor boy would never be able to explain how the witch ended up in his lap…

"Sexy friends," Eruka stated seriously, Kid nodded weakly.

"Sexy friends…"