Madara stalks Mito.
More like, he fails to understand that the definition of stalking includes being somewhat inconspicuous...right?
By request.
ANNOUNCEMENT:
Hey guys, I'm starting a new story...still sort of silly most of the time, but based off of Obito growing up with Madara!
(In Naruto's messed up timeline, where somehow, in about a year plus some, his voice goes from a 12-year old's to a man's...etc.)
Check it out if you'd like!
...when I put it up, that is. :D
Note: I'm sorry if it's not as good as you would've liked, but I got a little lost on the way and improvised. Hope it's okay. -sweat drop-
Disclaimer: Naruto's not mine. If it was mine, Orochimaru and the messed up Naruto timeline would've saved Rin somehow. That, and I would've revealed the reason for Kirigakure's need of Rin already...=3=
BUT I do love Tobi's "Frill-necked Lizard no jutsu!" because in the wordless of chapter "Uchiha Obito" (lol forgot the number) there's a flashback of Obito hanging from a tree the same way.
Random note: I also love voice actor crossovers. Tooooo much.
(Like how in Fairy Tail, Bacchus is Adult Lambo (KHR)/Aoba (Naruto), and Sting Eucliffe is Yuu Kanda (DGM)/Claude Faustus (Kuroshitsuji)/Sasori (Naruto) . . . -laughs-
Chapter 23: Grand Entrances
It was only a feeling, but ever since someone sneezed during the Academy's special assembly, Mariko had a vague feeling that she was being watched. No, Mariko herself was not being watched, but she definitely sensed a strange presence, and it was following none other than…
Mito.
Said redhead went on with her life, a life as normal as the life of the Hokage's wife could get. She had just presented a small, interesting display of medical ninjutsu to the Academy's young, growing shinobi, in hopes of inspiring a new medical force for Konoha's future. It had been by Tobirama's suggestion, actually, which surprised everyone. After Hashirama had approved, Mito was sent to prepare something the kids would find interesting.
"Ruuunnnnn!" someone suddenly hollered. Despite his warning, his voice was ridiculously high-pitched, and so no one took him seriously. Inuzuka Shiro was closely followed by a hoard of insects. Several villagers cringed and retreated into their homes and shops, while the shinobi assumed that the poor dog boy had provoked a poor Aburame, and was facing the consequences of poking fun at a bug boy.
No, the Aburame was actually not chasing Shiro.
The Aburame was running with Shiro.
This was soon explained, when the Aburame boy appeared with a rather horrified expression on his barely visible face, following Shiro as a magnificent fireball rolled their way.
Why…is a fireball rolling through the village?
This…this was obviously dangerous, yet all of the shinobi stood there and stared at the fire—it was like a tumbleweed, except in a video game; slow motion rolling—with Generic Face of Shock #5.
A shadow appeared over them, and someone spat out a Suiton jutsu rather effortlessly. Tobirama landed lightly on his toes, ready to apprehend the source of the menacingly slow fireball threatening the young genin of Konoha.
"Tobiramaaa!" wailed Mariko, having been abandoned on the top of a water tower. How she got there, Mito had no idea. Tobirama waved her off for the moment and advanced down the road, looking absolutely ridiculous because nothing was there. It was rather impressive when Tobirama chose to be serious, but he often chose the wrong occasions to do so. In any case, however, Tobirama was definitely on guard now.
Meanwhile, Mariko had ventured down from the water tower, and was now skipping along rooftops. Mito sighed. She wondered what the Senju reputation looked like with these two around—Tobirama, who was unbearably foolish at times, but all of a sudden as professional as Hashirama, and Mariko, who was everything except a weatherworn, serious, mature adult. Okay, she wasn't exactly immature, but her demeanor, plus her small figure and cute face, made her look like the most adorable little girl.
"Madara!" exclaimed Tobirama, apprehending the culprit. Madara held his hands up.
"Why, if it isn't Tobirama!" the Uchiha said far too cheerfully.
"Madara, what…what was that?" asked Tobirama, rather confused. And if Tobirama was confused in his serious mode, then…well, things were definitely puzzling.
"What was what?" Madara returned rather casually.
"The fireball," Tobirama said flatly.
"Oh, that. That wasn't me."
"It wasn't?"
"Nope."
"Then who was it?"
Madara stepped aside, revealing Hiruzen, who swore to himself and fled the scene. How he managed to hide behind Madara, despite being a rather gangly boy of almost 12 years, they would never know. And why he chose Madara—also, the fact that Madara let him was strange enough…—was another unanswerable question.
Well, given that Hiruzen was a Sarutobi, a clan whose fire-spitting prowess almost rivaled that of the fan-wielding Uchiha, then it sort of made sense. Except for the fact that Tobirama lacked the memory as to when Hiruzen had learned such a thing, especially for a genin.
"Tobirama!" snapped Mariko, pouncing on him. He made something that sounded like "gah!" and "oof!" and "bleh!" all at once, as the small woman leapt up (quite far, seeing as Tobirama was a tall guy) to wrap her arms around his neck, effectively strangling him.
"Mariko—can't—breathe," he choked, hands clutching at her smaller ones. In the moments between Tobirama clawing at her hands, and then removing them from their death-grip around his neck, Mariko glanced at Madara. Madara's eyebrows only wiggled enigmatically, before he grandly turned on his heel and swept away in a fashion meant for an evil villain donned in a badass cape, but he lacked the cape, so his efforts were futile.
"You!" Mariko exclaimed, shoving Tobirama with her shoulder. "Left! Me! On! The! Water tower!"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm—oof!" Mariko socked him in the gut. Given that she was small and nowhere as monstrously strong as Mito, it shouldn't have hurt much, but wives tend to be powerful when they need to be, so Tobirama doubled over. She had also threatened to hit a spot that would hurt….a lot.
"I don't want to know what you're doing, but Tobirama, you're needed at the Hokage Tower." Toka appeared, then, and she motioned for Mito to follow as well. Tobirama ended up giving Mariko a piggyback ride—during which she told him to stop touching her ass—all the way to Hashirama's office.
"Don't be silly, I did no such thing," was Tobirama's consistent answer.
There it was again. A shadow passed, and Mariko swore she saw someone there. And she knew exactly who it was. It seemed that Tenzou knew, too, because he hissed.
And later, there it was again, at the restaurant.
And again, at the market.
And again, at the hot springs.
The hot springs?
"Mito," Mariko said, rather worried.
"Yes?"
"Someone's….following you."
"Following me?" Mito glanced around, dipping her fingers in the comfortably warm water, watching her reflection swirl and distort. "Are you sure he's not following you?"
"I'm sure."
Mito began feeling the hairs on the back of her neck prickle, especially after Mariko's quite random statement. It was only when she reached the grocery store that she felt the familiar glare of a red eye. She whipped around.
"Madara. Have you been stalking me?"
No answer.
"Madara!"
No answer again.
Well, it wasn't that Madara didn't answer, but Mito's face just then was so terrifying, that he had chosen to retreat into the shadows…
"Where's Madara-sama?" Kagami asked. Izuna shrugged, and Kagami sighed. His little cousin, a girl of about 5 years, had baked the clan leader some cookies. She really, really wanted to give them to the clan leader, but was too afraid to ask. So, knowing that her big cousin Kagami was on good terms with Madara, she asked him to help.
And Madara was now missing.
Just kidding, the clan leader stumbled into the room, nearly knocking Kagami and his little cousin over. The little girl's eyes went wide, and she quivered with terror.
"Ah, Madara-sama, my cousin made cookies for you!"
Madara, who had been about to grab a set of kunai and then run out again, paused in surprise.
"Oh. Thanks, little one." He knelt down so that he was eye level with the little girl, and smiled. It was actually a rather warm smile, not one of those menacingly creepy ones. The little girl beamed up at the clan leader and offered her little box, wrapped up all prettily just for him.
"For Madada-sama," she exclaimed happily, her child's tongue unable to say Madara's name, though it seemed like a rather easy name. Madara tousled the girl's hair gently, and accepted the cookies.
"Kagami, you and your cousin feel free to take anything you want. Eat dinner, or something," Madara said, waving nonchalantly. "I have to go out again."
He left.
Kagami stared at the door to the kitchen, then at the door through which Madara had exited, then at Kagami, who was solving a Sudoku puzzle without even looking.
How is he doing that? Kagami vaguely wondered.
I read the ink with my chakra, Izuna mentally answered. Then, he said:
"Nii-san has always been fond of the little ones. He actually enjoys taking care of them," Izuna said, reminiscing. "I remembered when he wanted a little sister. I was quite offended, you know."
Kagami smiled, though it was sort of a forced smile. He glanced at his cousin, who was exploring the living room now.
"Well. By fond of the little ones, I mean that he doesn't mind them. He likes it when the kids aren't afraid of him. Though, if he were to take care of a kid, I think he'd seriously go mad." Then to himself, "Not that he isn't sort of crazy already."
Kagami sweat-dropped; that was an understatement.
And so, Madara, for the span of a few weeks, kept tailing a certain redhead. And little by little, Mito began to notice. She was surprised that her kunoichi senses hadn't alerted her of the fact that the crazy Uchiha and his alien pheromones (or whatever it was that he gave off) was stalking her.
Madara happened to choose the grocery shop as his next hiding spot, which was perfect, because he knew Mito planned to drop by later to buy something for her now famous Senju hotpot. He put on a hat, glasses, and didn't even bother using a Henge to disguise himself. Let's just say that this week didn't go too well for Madara.
Mito reached the fruits and vegetables quarter of the grocery store. She picked up a mighty fine apple when a sniggering teen wearing very large, very square glasses, a plaid shirt, and tight jeans, accompanied by a baseball cap that covered his face, walked by. More like he sauntered by with what he thought was impressive swag.
No.
Uchiha Swag.
Mito frowned, put the apple back down, and paused. The teen pretended to browse the pears, but what teenager browses pears, let alone buys stuff at a grocery store unless it's cupcakes after a sports game? Anyway.
"Excuse me," Mito said, pretending to brush by the kid. The kid shuffled sideways and grinned creepily at her. There was no way Mito wouldn't recognize that grin, and as soon as the slightly crooked nose appeared, she knew for sure. She herself had broken that nose.
She socked the kid in the face, and he flew all the way to the cash registers.
"You look horrendous in that!" Mito hollered angrily, as the cap flew off Madara's head and he knocked over a poor boy who was trying to work as a cash register clerk, but always ran into trouble.
(Inwardly, the boy thought, Why is it that wherever I go, this guy and whoever's with him mess up the store?! The poor thing had just switched jobs from the weapons department at the mall…Not just because Kagami and co. had ruined it and gotten him fired, but also because a huge-ass centipede decided to make itself at home on top of his price scanner laser thingy.)
"Forever young," Madara called feebly, leaning back on the mini conveyor belt that brought soon-to-be purchased items to their doom.
"Forever old, in your case," Mito deadpanned. "I'm not sure you want to break that nose again."
"I don't," Madara replied.
So, Madara, being the Uchiha idiot that he was, continued to stalk Mito. He chose to interrupt Mito's "once-a-month-I-treat-myself-to-cake" day, right smack in the middle of the market. Mito was picking out a tasty, decorated pastry when someone accidentally bumped into her, and there was a terrifyingly loud
SPLAT.
It seemed more like Madara was trying to get himself killed, rather than stalk the Uzumaki. Whatever the reason, he was smart enough to duck and cover his nose. However, he didn't duck fast enough, because an enraged redhead spun around and punched him. Her infamous temper, equal to that of the future "Bloody Red Habanero, wife of the Fourth Hokage", had shown. Let it be known that Tsunade inherited her super strength from a certain woman…
The glass windows shattered upon impact, and a body flew through. Hashirama ducked just in time to miss having his head taken off by a flying Madara, who crashed into his office and rolled onto the ground, effectively taking all the papers on the table with him.
"Madara!" exclaimed Hashirama. A pause. "Madara?"
The Uchiha lay still on the ground, and Hashirama suddenly wondered if he was dead. That would've been the end to many of his troubles, but yet the beginning of a much larger one, if the Uchiha actually still followed their supposed clan head.
"Madara?" repeated the First Hokage, glancing warily at the figure still crumpled up in front of him. Madara began to moan, and Hashirama breathed a sigh of relief. The Uchiha clutched his face, which had probably been broken, plus the nose again, and shook his head. The village below them clamored at the action, people watching in shock as Mito's fist literally smoked from the shot.
Among the many voices, one closer to the Hokage Tower shouted:
"It's a new record!"
Obviously Tobirama.
Hashirama shook his head and sighed, offering Madara a hand. The Uchiha viciously glared at the Senju and hastily got up himself, though he teetered around the room until Hashirama set a firm hand on his shoulder. Madara brushed him away, hissing something that vaguely sounded like "I don't need your help" except muffled, but nearly collapsed again.
"You see, Madara, these things wouldn't happen if you didn't stalk my wife."
Specials included:
Perverted Tobirama. (yes -nods-)
Kagami's nameless baby cousin (she must be adorable...)
Crazy Madara.
Hipster!Madara (courtesy of BaronBamboozle on deviantART and tumblr)
Mysterious Hiruzen.
I pity the First. OTL.