A/N: I told you I'd type fast. =) 2 ch. in one day, phew. Well keep reading- what are you people doing, reading all of my rants? Are you crazy? Anyways, tell me what you think about Vittoria... and no- she has non connection to Victoria at all. The name is just Italian so I thought " what the heck- may as well use it."

Please Please Please with a cherry on top of a mint chocolate chip ice cream with whip cream, hot fudge, sprinkles and Reese's Peanut Butter cup chunks on top- Review (try saying that in one breath lolz)

Disclaimer: I really think it should be mine, but alas 'tis not. **sigh**

Failing to Admit

Chapter 7

Bella's POV

(2 years later)

I sighed as I pushed my long hair over my shoulder and blew my bangs out of my eyes. Vittoria had invited me to a sleepover for her birthday and I had agreed. My mom thought that it was unhealthy for me to spend so much of my time alone. Vittoria's appearance was unorthodox, but that didn't seem to matter to my mother- so long as I wasn't holed up in my room. Vittoria had long black hair and dark tanned skin. I suppose that most people in Italy have those looks. I am the exception to that rule. Vittoria's wardrobe mainly consists of black tank tops and camouflage/ olive green Capri's. Occasionally she'll wear a pair of jeans but she says she keeps those for special events.

She normally wears dark makeup and she has at least six piercings on each ear. Her mom says that she has some major anger issues, but regardless of what she says, Vittoria is still a good person. She only speaks her mind if she feels like she has to and she doesn't need to speak to get her point across. Unlike other people, Vittoria understood that sometimes I just didn't feel like talking. She said that when people were weird it usually meant that there was something that people didn't understand about them- something that they didn't feel like knowing. She was right, as usual. I didn't even want to know about it and I was the epitome of the problem.

I was in High School now so it was easier to hide my secret, but it was not as easy to hide from people. Teenagers were always suspicious. They didn't like to be wrong about things and they loved to get into everyone else's business. I felt suffocated at school- like I couldn't have any privacy. I had some close calls when someone would start a rumor that I was seriously older than 15 and I had been taking A.D. [age decreasing] (A/N:remember this takes place in the future. IDK what they'll have then...) pills. It wasn't anywhere close to the truth but I was anxious that anyone would be at all close to what had actually happened.

Vittoria kept me sane even when she didn't know why I was acing insane. I appreciated that she was there. I would be forever in her debt. I didn't know why but I always felt like I had forever to go on.

After Vittoria and I became friends, a bunch of people got suspicious at how such a 'goody-goody' like me would fit in with a 'gothic/emo slut' like her. Rumors started that I was actually a backdoor drug seller. Somehow word of the rumor got to my parents and they decided that I needed an intervention from my 'evil drug selling ways'. When they first told me that, I nearly burst out into hysterical laughter. For as long as I can remember, I have detested drugs.

Either way mine and Vittoria's parents took us out of school and to a hospital. They had our stomachs pumped and a long-term drug test done. Needless to say, the test turned up clean and when our parents talked to the doctor he said that it was highly unlikely that we had ever taken drugs rather than prescription painkillers. I never actually met the doctor but from what my parents said, he was extremely good looking and he was known all over Italy, England, Australia, Asia, and the United States. My stomach clenched when I thought about who reminded me about that exact profile.

After awhile I got over the fact that he sounded so familiar and Vittoria and I left the hospital with the parents asking for our forgiveness since they didn't trust us.

So tonight I was going over to Vittoria's house for a sleepover. I wasn't sure what was going to happen since I had only been over to her house three or four times. Vittoria's room was completely different from her attitude. Her mother insisted on painting it pink with blue and purple hearts. She said that it added a flare to Vittoria's personality. Vittoria said it added nausea to her increasing life-headache.

The only thing that had me getting a thorn in my side was the rumor that Vittoria did a lot of voodoo and séances. I know that it's hypocritical for me to judge her by the rumors but this one seemed more likely to have some truth behind it. Although Vittoria didn't actually nurse a red vendetta on anyone, I knew for a fact that she did absolutely loathe some people at our school since they found it amusing to tease her about the incident with her father.

I thought about this as I piled into the car with all of my junk and my mom drove me to Vittoria's house. As I got out of the car my mother beckoned me over to the driver's side. She told me to behave myself around Mrs. Leonard (Vittoria's mother). She then kissed me on my cheek and told me to have fun. I took that as my cue to step away from the door. I walked up to the intimidating front door. It was big and it looked like black iron. I wouldn't doubt it. Vittoria lived on one of the oldest lots in the neighborhood. It was from the 1890's.

I couldn't help but feel bad for Vittoria- her mother thought that she had some major anger issues but I knew the truth. She truly hated her mother, but at the same time she pitied her. Vittoria's father committed suicide when she was 9 years old. The only problem is that Vittoria was there when it happened. He killed himself right in front of his daughter. It was the worst thing possible that he could have done. The doctor said that she was so traumatized that she has blocked out all the memories of her father and she can't remember what she saw. That's a good thing, except for the fact that Mrs. Leonard's lawyers believe that Mr. Leonard may have told her where his will was hidden. Vittoria says that her mother has hated her father since he committed the suicide and that the only reason she wants the will is to see what he left for her. It sounded like a juicy plot but all of it disgusted Vittoria. The result of this story- yeah, she has some anger issues.

The worst part for Vittoria is that her mother never sold the house that her father committed the act in. She thinks that if Vittoria is around the room where it happened enough then it will spark a memory and Vittoria will have to tell everyone where the will is. Unfortunately, for now, Mrs. Leonard has all of the possessions of Mr. Leonard- including the house, since the will was never recovered.

I heaved up the huge silver knocker on the door and let it sling back down. It thundered and then ended with a resounding clang. I could hear footsteps rushing to the door before it opened with a groan. Vittori stood there in her black tank top and

a pair of camouflaged Capri's. She smiled at me before letting me pass through the door. I didn't really see the point of me doing this. What did my mother expect us to do anyways? Did she think that we were going to lie around doing truth or dare? Or maybe she thought we would have makeovers or something. Either way, I knew that there was no way that Vittoria had come up with this. I headed up to her room and she motioned for me to put my stuff down. We sat at on her bed and stared at opposite corners off the room. I finally looked up and her eyes flickered up. I gave her a confused look. She sighed.

"My mother wants me to seem normal. She didn't sell the house and that's got the social security system worried about me." I nodded my understanding. I knew that she wanted nothing to do with her mother's scheming. We plopped onto our backs on the bed and fell into silence again.

I started reflecting on Vittoria again. She was always calm about everything. It was a bit unnerving that she always seemed that way. It was then that I had a minor epiphany. Not only did people seem afraid of me because their subconscious told us I was different but I was calm all the time as well. Underneath the surface I was churning with bottled emotions and I was ready to burst, but to everyone else I was emotionless. They could never gage my reactions because I didn't react. They were afraid of us because they thought we were crazy- to them it was as if we could crack at any moment and go on a killing spree. It had been a few days since I had thought about it but that brought it back. The similarities between me and vampires. Just the words 'killing spree' triggered something in me and somehow I knew that it was true. People were seriously afraid of us. In this one instance, ignorance wasn't bliss. They didn't know how we felt- ever and that did not work to their advantage.

Another thing that I liked about Vittori was the fact that she despised boys. She absolutely abhorred them. It was a good thing to because I didn't need any nosey person poking around asking me about my love life. I was lucky that she wasn't a gossip queen like Jessica or Lauren. Of course, there were still people like that out there but I didn't associate myself with those people. Come to think about it I didn't associate myself with anyone rather than Vittoria and my family. I was glad that whenever I seemed off or in my own world my family understood and left me alone. Sometimes I thought that my mother worried about me, but then I would distract her by jumping into a story about Antonio. She loved him so much- she would do anything for him.

I was glad- I held no grudge against her for picking him as her favorite. It was blatantly obvious but I refused to be jealous. I had already had one lifetime of a mother's love. Antonio deserved it more anyway. If I wasn't good enough for him then why should I be good enough for anyone else? I may as well have been worthless.

We may have sat on that bed for a few hours or it could have been a few minutes, but I was starting to feel claustrophobic by just sitting there staring at a corner. I felt like a pathetic animal in a cage who had just given up on trying to escape. I suggested that we get out of the house and go down to the movie rental lace. We ended up getting a horror movie about vampires- go figure.

I sat and watched it- bored with the ludicrous things that video companies came up with in Hollywood. It was odd to see that when I looked over at Vittoria her mouth was open in a horrified O-shape as she watched someone's throat being torn out. She seemed genuinely scared and for a second I wished that I could tell her that there were people out there who were good and they wouldn't hurt her- but then I remembered that even that was a lie because they absolutely could hurt you and, if you gave them the chance, they would probably ripe your heart out just for the fun of it. I shook my head from side to side as if I could physically fling them out of my head.

I looked back at the movie and then all of the sudden I knew that Vittoria trusted me completely. I knew that if anyone else saw her like this then they would use it against her. They would tease her that she couldn't even handle a little blood. If only they knew that I fainted at the smell of blood. Well… technically I had two different reactions to blood that I couldn't control. I would either faint at the smell of the blood or I would become intrigued by it and want to analyze exactly who or what it came from. Maybe the first reaction was a more normal or perhaps I was just going crazy.

Anyway I knew that she trusted me completely because otherwise she wouldn't let me see this side of her. The side that was afraid of death to the point of wearing amulets to protect herself. She was so afraid and I wished that I could help her, but I knew that no matter what I did she would always be afraid.

We shared that- being afraid of death. I was afraid that I wouldn't get another chance at life to be happy and normal without the influence of mythical creatures. I figured that was why Keeper had given me back my mortality- my life. The only reason I could guess was that he thought that I was cheated out of my first life experience. It's either that or I'm missing something huge. Now the only thing I can't figure out is why he would give me back my life if he chose to give me back my memories as well? Why didn't he just clean my soul? What was it that I was missing?

What's you're best friends name? Just review and tell me if you want me to use it as a character's name in later chapters.

I would like to put out a public service announcement due to a small piece of content from this chapter:

If you or anyone you know is thinking about commiting suicide- STOP. Think first and talk to someone about it. Contact a relief system and get help!