Huzzah! New chapter! Yay! Okay I won't keep you long but you NEED to read the first three chapters if you haven't done so already. And afterwards, meaning after you have finished reading the first three chapters and you have read this chapter, check back to the my profile and read the update, 'kay? Vitally important you guys! Enjoy!

-XxGaarasGirlXx

Chapter 29

She spent the night at Ino's curled up on the couch, swamped with a large comforter. Ino had offered the bed, but Sakura declined. She was tired of the pity and sympathy. Of course she would have gone home if she were allowed, but Ino and Naruto both decided it would be better for her to stay.

Sakura got the feeling they were making sure she didn't try to commit suicide due to her grief.

Countless times Sakura stirred, unable to sleep. Her dreams were filled with images of the past months and it made her heart ache painfully. So, she spent most of the night staring up at the ceiling, imagining patterns in the texture that were not really there. It was a long, long night.

At one point she sat up and groaned, fed up with trying to sleep. Naruto shifted in the recliner across from her, turning on his side and snoring softly. Sakura stared at him with empty eyes. He really was a good friend, refusing to leave her side even after she said she was going to bed. And having the patience to deal with her silence when he attempted conversation. Now that she thought about it though, he didn't talk as much as he usually did. Which was unsettling since Naruto was known for never shutting up.

Sakura's brow furrowed and she drew her knees up to her chest. If she weren't careful, her thoughts would wonder and she would end up a helpless heap on the couch come morning. Forcing herself away from the feelings crowding her chest and mind, she focused on Naruto, depicting every feature and every memory she had of him.

His blonde hair stuck up in messy spikes, framing his chiseled face softly. His lips were parted as he breathed deeply and his chest moved with every inhale and exhale. Sakura's eyes traced his form, becoming surprised as she finally noticed how much he had grown since they had been in highschool together. It was almost unreal. Back then he had been a gangly, unbalanced teenager. Almost awkward in his own skin. He stumbled, his voice cracked, his legs and arms seemed too long for his body since he could hardly function without knocking something over.

Tears stung Sakura's eyes as a bitter smile broke across her lips. It was a sad smile and her fingers covered it, trying to hide it from closed eyes.

When had he grown up? Out of all of them, Sakura had always pegged Naruto as the one that would never mature. The one that she could always count on to stay in the past. As she watched him sleep she mentally cursed herself. How cruel to think that she could make him be the memoir of her childhood. He was his own person, not her personal talisman to better days.

Still, her heart ached at the thought that he had grown up and she hadn't noticed. In a way she wished he was still the goofy teenager that waited at the corner of her street to walk with her to the bus. At the memory, Sakura coughed a broken laugh as tears spilled from her eyes. God, how she missed those times.

Naruto's nose scrunched up in his sleep and Sakura bit back another laugh at how childish he looked. He seemed so care free in his sleep, reminding her even more of the boy he used to be. If she concentrated, she could still see the boistrous trouble maker bouncing aroud homeroom while their lazy teacher sat behind the desk with his nose buried in an adult novel. Countless times Naruto and the others had tried to see what was between those pages, but Kakashi, their teacher, had always managed to know about the plan ahead of time and eluded them.

Sakura stood from the couch and crossed the room to stand in front of Naruto's sleeping form. Her chest constricted as she wished for the past to come and swallow her so that she could be back in such simpler times. Back then her hardest times were when she had to decide if her shirt clashed with her hair color. Sobbing, she crawled into the chair beside Naruto and folded herself against him, drawing comfort from his solid form.

In minutes, the pain ebbed enough for her to drift into a fitful sleep filled with heartbreaking red-heads and groups of awkward teenagers laughing at secret jokes.

XXXXXX

"You know that you have to stop this. It isn't going to change anything and I know that you understand that."

Gaara remained silent, glaring harshly at the blond woman before him with cold, abandoned eyes.

"Listen to me. One of two things are going to happen if you do not change your attitude, Gaara. One, I will immediately put you back on Mercital." she ignored the spark of rage cross his features. "Or, two, you will be emitted into Suna's facility a full three days' flight away from here."

Even Tsunade could see the impact of her words and she forced herself not to show sympathy. It was cruel to throw out the name of his hometown so blatantly, but it was necessary. If she didn't, if she continued to beat around the bush, he would know with absolute certainty that he had power of her and that was just not acceptable. Not only was it a slap in the face to thrust his past at him without warning, but to add salt to the open wound, Suna's mental hospital was less then adequate. If someone was sent there it was meant as a last resort or that the family of the patient just didn't give a damn.

It was even rumored that torture was the main discipline practiced behind those crumbled walls. Tsunade swallowed the bile rising in her throat. It was not her decision to put this option on the table. No, never would she put a patient at such a high risk. There were doctors above her in the field she worked however, and despite her efforts, when the old goats decided that a patient just wasn't making enough progress for their tastes - Suna came into play. No matter how much she fought against it, ultimately, it was not her place.

Somehow Tsunade had managed to dodge their focuses on Gaara, mostly because he was a tough case to crack and mainly because she had become dangerously attached to him. It was just a waste of youth to let him rot in the facility, so she had assigned treatment to him full force from day one. But he fought against it so ferociously that it seemed as if he didn't want to be helped.

Tsunade's hazel eyes snapped to Gaara's face and pierced straight through his mask with sudden clarity. She could almost see the crack on the surface and she saw past the facade of anger and hate straight to the fear he held so close to his chest. For the first time in all the years Gaara had been held like a prisoner in her building, Tsunade finally saw the scared little boy huddled deep within the shadows.

In her moment of shock, Gaara slammed out of the room in raging panic at the sudden vulnerablity washing over him in violent waves and ran for the only solitude he knew. Tsunade stared at the empty chair, not fully comprehending that he was gone, and felt the stampede of calculations and records and stories and lies and pain - the enigma that was Gaara, fall heavily into her lap. Silence rang in her ears but had no effect on the loud shouting inside her head.

All this time she had thought that Gaara had a problem with authority, a problem with society, balking at any mention of obeying and refusing to conform because in his head it was right. She believed that his dementia and solitude was induced from the complete and total abandonment of his entire family, from his mother's death and father's cruel nature and uncle's betrayl. From his brother and sister cutting off their visits as they slowly but surely over time gave up on him like all the others before them.

"Oh, my God..."

Could it be that he pushed people away just to test them at how much they cared? That his twisted ways of insulting and mocking were ways of covering up how much pain he was in? All of his cruel ways and cold words were, in his own way, cries for help. In the only way he knew how, he was asking someone to show him how to shed the pain and guide him to the sun.

When he was young and silent the first night he came, he was definately out of his mind there was no doubt. It was no secret to Tsunade that he had commited murder. She couldn't and wouldn't condemn him though, whether from fear or sympathy, she wasn't sure. He was alone and abandoned and stripped of everything he knew. He was only a child. After that, he closed off. She gathered from his home life that he was never expressive in the first place, never learned how to handle confusion and pain and sadness in such large doses very well. If she had not been so blind in the beginning, if she had centered more attention on him and broke down his mannerismis, could she have saved him all these years of suffering?

He was so hateful because he knew nothing else, never learned anything else. He didn't know how to ask for the help he so desperately needed and wanted. The little boy inside cried while the man on the outside lived in a day to day constant turmoil of confusion. The man and the boy didn't and couldn't cope, and it drove Gaara into his current state and with every passing day, deeper and deeper into the black hole he was burying himself in.

And Sakura had been almost like his final act. His final plea. It was clear he couldn't handle his emotions well, and then having her slam into his life and bringing forth an emotion he had never felt and never dreamed of feeling had been like being blindsided by an out-of-control vehicle while you are riding only a bycicle. He drew her into his life and tried in vain to show her his mess of confusion, only to see that she was just as blind as everyone else. She tried, and he could see that, but it wasn't enough.

She couldn't see him. To him, Tsunade figured there was a glass wall between himself and Sakura and no matter how she tried, she couldn't break past it. She tried harder than most, and Tsunade found this to be why Gaara found himself inisblicibly drawn to her. But something had soured, something had gone wrong between them and he had backpedaled so fast it left the both of them dazed.

Tsunade guessed it was because of love. Gaara didn't understand it, and what he didn't understand, he feared. Hated. Despised. Ran from with his tail tucked between his legs. He had tried to plead with Sakura for her help and warmth, but neither understood exactly how to go about breaking the glass instead of only scratching the surface like it had been done for years.

The phone on Tsunade's desk gave a sudden, shrill ring and she jumped clear out of her seat with her hands clutching at the edges of the desk. Blinking repeatedly, she jerked the phone off the hook.

"Yes? What is it?" she said slowly, still shaken from the revelation still whirring within her head.

"I'm sorry to disturbed you, Tsunade, but there's a problem in the cafeteria."

The nasal voice of the secretary brought Tsunade from her foggy thoughts. "Right. Okay, I'll be there shortly. Make sure no one hurts themselves."

"Yes ma'am."

When the line disconnected and Tsunade heard the dial tone in her hear, she dropped the phone and took a few deep breaths to clear her thoughts. She had a job to do still, but once she finished with the little squabble in the cafeteria, she was heading straight to Gaara's room with her findings. Right then and there, Tsunade vowed that she would fight him head to head in order to show him that she finally understood.

And to show him that she was sorry for not seeing sooner.

XXXXXX

Sakura woke slowly that morning, having sometime during the night fallen into a deep and dreamless slumber and was finding it difficult to pull herself from that lazy, relaxed state. Her blood felt sluggish as it moved through her veins, bones reduced to nothing but mush inside her body. She groaned quietly and rolled onto her stomach only to be stopped by a solid body lying next to her. A sharp pain stabbed Sakura in the gut and she forced herself not to cry as a face flashed through her head like a knife. Piercing eyes, crimson hair, and a voice that made her knees weak.

She swallowed thickly and forced the memories away, trapping them in steel box with thick chains and locks in the back of her mind. And that's where they would stay until she stopped breathing. At least, that's what she convinced herself, and prayed for to happen. Finally, she opened her eyes and watched as Naruto breathed in and out, brow knitted for a reason she couldn't fathom.

She would have let him sleep longer, but his arms were wrapped around her waist, and Sakura found a rising panic rising from her stomach and threatening to spill from her mouth and eyes. She wasn't ready for this. Jerkily, she shoved his shoulder and twisted out of his grip to get off the cramped recliner. How they both managed to sleep in it was beyond her.

"Wake up, Naruto!" she hissed, watching as his eyes snapped open and he jumped in the chair - almost flipping over the side.

"What?! What's going on!?" he shouted as he blinked rapidly, swinging his head left and right in an attempt to understand why he wasn't in his bed in his own house.

Sakura smacked her hand over his mouth. "Shh! I think Ino is still asleep."

His bright azure eyes stared up at her wildly and then visibly showed understanding, then relief. He nodded his head, showing he wouldn't be loud anymore and sagged back into the cushions when she removed her hand.

"You didn't have to give me a heart-attack, Sakura. All you had to do was nudge my shoulder or something." he grunted. Running a hand though his messy hair, he yawned and stretched his arms over his head.

Sakura averted her eyes and crossed her arms. "Well, I wouldn't have had to wake you up like that if you wouldn't have been...nevermind," she sighed and shook her head, refusing to walk down the road that would dredge up what she had just locked away. "Look, I'm hungry. Let's fix us something to eat before Ino wakes up and burns breakfast."

"I resent that, Billboard Brow," A teasing voice spoke up from the kitchen. "I'm actually a fairly good cook thanks to Chouji." Ino said, grinning as she walked into the spacious living room with two steaming plates of eggs, bacon and an assortment of delectable, chopped fruits.

Sakura's eyes widened at the miracle before her. Ino had cooked, and it actually looked good. Naruto voiced his approval as he accepted the plate and promptly took a bite, chewing and swallowing in one movement before digging in like a starved pup. Sakura, too, accepted the plate offered and sat down on the couch.

"There isn't any poison in here, is there, Ino-pig?"

Sakura bit back a grin as Naruto choked on his food, staring down at his plate as if it would eat him. Ino narrowed her eyes on the pair and placed her hands on her hips.

"No," she huffed, and nodded approval when Naruto began eating again, albiet warily. "But I have some in the cabinet if you would like it sprinkled along with your salt."

Naruto snorted. "That doesn't surprise me." he muttered, swallowing a helping off eggs with bits of bacon.

Sakura smiled softly as they engaged in a friendly banter, trying not to fill like an imposter on the outside looking in. She knew it wasn't like that, but for some reason, it appeared so. Since when had she drifted so far from her friends? Thinking over it now, it was like she hardly knew them at all. Effectively ruining her appetite, Sakura pushed the now not-so-good looking food around on her plate and spiraled into a miserable mood. She sorely missed the comfort of close friends and yearned to have back that familiar happiness.

"Sakura? Hey, Sakura! Stop pushing around the food like that and eat!" Ino scolded, fixing her baby-blue eyes on her pink haired friend.

Sakura obidiently stuffed a forkful of fruit into her mouth and chewed mechanically. Ino eyed her skeptically and shrugged. "After you eat, you can take a shower. Naruto," she turned to the man as he licked his fork and scrunched her nose." You use the shower in the hall bathroom and Sakura can use the one in my bedroom." she leaned close to Sakura and whispered in her ear, "I have some pretty fancy bath oils if you're interested. Lots of pampering stuff from my mom when she visited. Feel free to spoil yourself."

"Thanks, Ino." Sakura said, giving her a genuine smile. Ino smiled brightly back, folding her hands in her lap.

"This was great, Ino. Really. I might have to start coming over here for breakfast every once in a while!" Naruto teased, standing and walking to the kitchen to deposit his dirty dishes in the sink.

Ino groaned. "Great. You feed a man once and he keeps coming back for more."

Sakura laughed quietly and set her own plate on the coffee table. "I can go home, you know. I don't need to eat up your food and hog your shower." Even though she said this, it was the exact opposite of what she was wanting. Her pride won out and beat back her blubbering side craving for her friends. Sakura hoped that Ino wouldn't kick her out just yet, she wanted to stay.

Ino, thankfully, waved a dismissive hand. "No dice, girl. I have plans for today, so you're stuck with me." her lips stretched into a smile that warned Sakura of trouble. It was the same smile Ino had worn the time she had pranked the entire female gym class freshman year. It served to be an easy class.

Naruto sauntered back into the room and plopped next to Sakura. "Plans?" he asked. "What kind of plans?"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Well, if you must know, I was planning a shopping spree. And maybe visit to one of those massage places? Oh, what do you call them..." she muttered, biting her thumbnail in thought.

"A masseuse?" Naruto provided.

Ino shrugged. "Close enough." she turned to Sakura. "How does that sound? Good?"

"Well - "

"Hinata and Tenten are going to be there, too. I called them this morning and they can't wait to meet up with you again."

Sakura found herself wondering bitterly how it came about that Ino was still capable of keeping in contact with the girls after highschool and college when she couldn't. Had work really been so important to her up until this point? What a sad life she had led, friendless, boring...in fact, it might as well be described as lifeless because that's what she didn't have. A life.

"That sounds fun." Sakura responded, picking at a loose thread on her pants.

Naruto nudged her shoulder. "How about me, Kiba and Shikamaru tag along?"

Sakura could see Ino working up an 'absolutely no way' and interfered. "Yeah, why not? Let's make a group of it! What about Chouji? And Lee and Neji? Shino?"

Ino shook her head, blond ponytail swishing softly. "Chouji's a traveling chef. Last I heard, he was in America studying different ways to prepare lobster. As for Lee and Neji, they took up hand-to-hand combat training in Iwa. Shino's around here somewhere...Naruto, you have his number, don't you?"

Once more, Sakura wilted at the knowledge of Ino knowing more about their highschool friends than she ever could.

"Yeah, I think so. Let me check. Be back in a few minutes." Naruto said, digging in his pocket for his Blackberry and walking out onto the porch.

"So that means we'll have..." Ino held up her hand and ticked off how many people would be part of their day out. "..six people. Okay, that's a good, even number don't you think?"

Sakura nodded, smiling. "Sounds fun."

The preparations were made quickly after Naruto came back in with Shino's assent (though Sakura wouldn't doubt that Naruto had bullied him into it. She might not know much about the group she hung around with in highschool, but she knew enough about Shino that he wasn't much of a social bug.) Ino seemed giddy with excitement and, unable to resist the gravitational pull of her personality, Sakura found herself feeling excited too. It seemed like forever to her that she had spent time will everyone at once. The last get together she could remember was forcing Kiba and Naruto to buy her groceries after clearing out her fridge.

So it was with great relief that she felt happy about the day ahead. Things were changing for the better already, and Sakura was embracing the change with an open mind and open arms. It seemed that it couldn't have come any sooner to her.

So was that good? What did you think about Gaara's part? Please tell me, I've bitten my nails off from anxiety! Please please please! And also, go back to my profile and read the update. Very important! Vital! I will die if you don't read it!!!! Do you want me to die? Huh?! Do you!? Then go read my update on my profile!!

EDIT: Okay, so I just spent an hour resurrecting this story since somehow it got deleted. Don't know how but it did. So if some of the chapters are not what they were before (aside from the first three) then please tell me so I can go back and fix them okay? This is also very important! Again, I am so so so so so sorry!