Unlikely: Chapter 3

By Sam Black

I stayed on my own front porch as Edd hobbled his poor sickly self home. I had wanted to walk him, but my earlier show of feminine neediness would have made it too awkward.

Staying on the porch and making sure he didn't get mugged on the short walk would be good enough for me at this point in time.

I couldn't believe I had pulled such a stunt. What an "attention whore" move!

As soon as Edd opened his front door, he turned, gave me a tired wave goodbye, and disappeared inside.

I let out the breath I had been holding and scrubbed my hands over my face in embarrassment, "Am I really that sad?" I demanded to know.

Probably.

The night had been going great.

The plan was, I give him the soup. We chat aimlessly. He falls madly in love with me. The end.

"Fail Jimmy. Epic Fail."

Maybe next time I would think more carefully about my plans.

I ran a hand through my hair, "Straight boys are so forbiddingly yummy." I moaned and decided to go inside take a nice hot shower.

I walked to the door and for a split second I thought I had locked myself out and would be doomed to sleep on the porch like I deserved.

The door opened easily and I was instead doomed to sleep in a big house all alone.

Both my parents travel for work, my dad works for a bank that does international business and my mother works for Doctors Without Borders.

Both jobs pay well, therefore I am a spoiled brat when it comes to getting whatever I want. When I was younger, they used to come home more and I had a nanny or relative stay when they were gone.

Now it's just me in a two-story suburban home with expendable income.

I'm surprised I haven't drowned myself in the pool from boredom.

Instead of taking a shower or doing anything else useful I flop down on the couch and take a look at the damage I did to my freshly painted toenails.

They weren't too bad, but my big toe was smudged and had carpet fuzz on it. So I reached for the nail polish remover and began to fix it.

As I mindlessly cleaned and repainted my nail I thought about Sarah and I wondered if she was having a good time at homecoming.

The guy she had gone with was a total douche, but when it came to guys, that was Sarah's type. The guys who got fake tans, plucked their eyebrows, worked out constantly, and treated their girlfriends like shit. Sarah liked douche bags.

In freshman year, Sarah had blossomed, and she was no longer the surly ugly duckling she had once been. She was now a Queen Bitch on Campus. And I loved her for it.

Beautiful and fearsome. Taking a look back to when we were kids, you would have never expected Sarah to have turned into the bombshell she is. I would have placed my money on Naz.

I chuckled, Naz was THE hottest girl in school. But she had high standards.

You need to have a high IQ, a sense of humor, and a vagina.

Most guys don't live up to the first two expectations, never mind the third.

My mind went back to Sarah and I lost my amusement. We had been friends for years, through thick and thin. Breakups and Hook ups. Bad haircuts and Puberty. We were best friends and knew everything about each other. She took my advice on everything from hair to clothes to movies.

I just wish she would take my advice when it came to guys.

It was our senior year, we had grown up so much. But she was still dating the boys who pulled your pig-tails and called you names when they had a crush on you.

Thinking about this I realized we had all grown up a lot over the years.

We all went to the same high school, this ragamuffin band of cul-de-sac kids. We've all known each other so long, some are closer that others. But we've all stuck together, even the Eds.

I know it sounds cliché, but I love everyone on this dead end loop. If only for the fact that I've been stuck with them.

I smiled at that thought, blowing on my toes and wiggling them happily.

As I basked in my wave of nostalgia and how the years just flew by without me realizing it I thought of Edd.

He had changed too. He was educated and interesting, even when you didn't want to interested. He always knew something about whatever topic you wanted to discuss, even if it was just a quirky fun fact. He had always been smart, but now he was brilliant. And funny in ways that always went above everyone's head. He had said something hilarious on the bus one time and I hadn't even realized how funny it was until I was taking off my shoes at the front door.

And he's polite, I've never met anyone so polite in my whole life.

He opens doors and says please and thank you. He helps old ladies carry their groceries and doesn't laugh when the soda machine steals your money.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I like him. A lot.

He had caught my attention in Sophomore year, the year I really began to explore what was outside of the closet. I had never really been in the closet, you don't go around looking as fabulous as I do and hide in the closet. But I had never realized there were a lot of other people who would want to date me because of it. Boys who would want to date me because of it.

So I was in the library, trying to find books about proper gay etiquette.

The library search computer was not being extremely helpful and I was getting frustrated.

Then I saw Edd.

---xxx---

"Edd! Help me!!"

Startled from his reading he looked up at me and smiled awkwardly, "Hello Jimmy."

I made myself look pathetic, "This computer is being stupid. Help me." I said.

He chuckled and marked his page, "What are you trying to find?" he asked as he got up from his chair and walked over.

"Books about how great I am." I said simply.

Edd arched an eyebrow, "Usually people die before anyone writes a book about them." he replied, coming to stand next to me.

"Not if it's an autobiography." I chirped and began clicking the mouse aimlessly.

He chuckled and pointed at something on the screen, "You're in the author's category, not subject. That might be why."

I suddenly felt stupid but recovered quickly, "Get it to tell me where the books about homosexuality are." I demanded, moving to where he could work his magic on the crappy school computer.

He didn't even look at the computer, "They're in the back near all the DVD's." he said.

My eyes found his and I gave him a look of completely attention.

He blushed.

"I was curious." he explained helplessly.

I nodded skeptically, "Any recommendations?" I asked.

His blush went away and that look he gets when he talks excitedly about something he finds fascinating took it's place.

"Well actually, they were all very informative. There was this one book about the gay culture that I just could not put down. Here I'll show you." He said taking my sleeve and pulling me over to where he had directed me before.

I ignored the fact that he was pulling on a sweater that cost me a 200 dollars and instead focused on how pleased I was that Edd was trying to help me out.

As we got to the shelf he began pulling out books and telling me which ones were good and which ones were great. He finally convinced me to check out three of the best and assured me that I would enjoy them.

When he had finally stopped talking I smiled and thanked him.

"It's no problem." he said modestly.

"It might not be. But still." I looked down at the books and smiled again, "Thank you Edd."

"You're welcome."

As he looked away bashfully I felt butterflies go crazy in my stomach.

He was cute.

And I told him as much.

He blushed furiously, stuttered a polite farewell, and hurried off.

And that was the start of what has yet to be.

---xxx---

I got up off the couch and picked up Edd's empty bowl, intent on putting it in the dishwasher and maybe cleaning up the house a little.

We had a housekeeper, and even though it's pretty much just me living here, it's a pretty big house. She works hard enough as it is, I could at least clean up some of my messes.

So I got to work and pulled out some cleaning supplies.

I don't usually clean. But for some reason, I felt like it tonight.

As I pulled out the vacuum, I gave a sigh at the expanse of the cushy carpeting. The house hadn't always been this big. But over the years it had grown from a modest two-bedroom to a giant two-story testament to parental wealth. Complete with pool, patio, and powder room.

And a monstrous living room, which I had stupidly decided to clean.

Sighing, I plugged in the Hoover and did a quick sweep of all the places I usually stepped on.

It took 10 minutes, which doesn't sound like a lot unless all you're doing is vacuuming.

When I had decided it was clean enough, I emptied the dust-catcher and threw the vacuum back in the storage closet with a sound of disgust. I had a new appreciation for the work Tess does when she cleans as I got to work on the kitchen. Not too much, just wiped down a few surfaces and put away a few dishes. As I was washing my hands a new urge struck me.

I waned to go swimming.

I looked at the clock and the urge went away.

Instead, I took a shower and went to bed.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow I would swim.