This next one is a list that anyone should have.

Top 5 Moments of Pwnage in a videogame:

If there is one thing we can all appreciate in a videogame, is the sensation of sheer pwnage and dominance that pervades us every time an enemy is defeated in the most spectacular and kickass way conceivable… Those peculiar moments that make you say: "You got pwned!" and perform a ridiculous tea bag dance in obvious sign of your disfiguring geekiness. This list is a collection of my favorite 5 moments in that specific category and the badass characters that performed them. As always, I'll have just one pick per franchise… Let the gratuitous display of punishment begin!

5) Final Blows (The Legend of Zelda series):

We all love and admire Link, our favorite hero in a green cap and his ridiculous amount of items and weapons. In his games there is room for plenty of cool looking devices able to transport your ugly enemies into an oblivion of torment and suffering death… But none of them can match the sheer awesomeness of finishing your incapacitated adversaries through unforgiving sword impalement! It doesn't matter if you're a simple pawn or a dungeon boss… You all are to going to suffer the same sharp fate, you're all going to get pwned by the indomitable badass blade of the Master Sword… Killing Ganondorf is so fulfilling. Freaking sword of ultimate punishment through his sternum or forehead… Just classic.

4) Lucario's Final Smash (Super Smash Brothers Brawl):

I've already mentioned in a previous list how cool Lucario was in this game (despite being a Pokèmon and all), and how astoundingly kickass was his super duper owning energy beam-like final smash… You just need to see it to truly understand what I mean.

3) The Darkness's Powers (The Darkness):

The Darkness was my very first game for the PS3 and, as you could tell, this huge FPS/RPG game left a huge impact in my own "Pwnage Meter 3000" … Mutilating careless enemies has never been so fun! The things you could do in that game were simply outstanding! You could sneak to your adversaries with a hellish snake, kill them and devour their hearts to gain experience and new colorful powers; you could impale them with your dark appendage or even unleash an uber powerful black hole and absorb their useless carcasses… In that game, Fear and excruciating painful Death were your sidekicks… Not to mention your own colorful group of dark minions, ready to unleash their wrath (as well as their namesake random humor) over your unfortunate victims. That's… Freaking… Awesome… In a dark way, of course.

2) Ultimate shooting frenzy with giant machine gun (Shadow the Hedgehog):

Aaaah yes, as I said before, this game rocks, rolls and own people's posterior for good. If there is something we don't usually see in a platform (especially not from this franchise) is weapons… Tons and tons of uber destructive weapons ready to deliver your customizable amount of pwnage to anything that moves! Shadow the Hedgehog doesn't care if you're a disgusting out-of-my-way alien or a corny human military, all he cares about is the Truth… And to unleash ultimate whooping to the suicidal fools who dares to lie a foot on his ultimate path of unspecific vengeance! The whole game play is filled with memorable display of carnage: shooting at super sonic speed, destroying the environment, rolling enemies with fancy vehicles in GTA style or even sucking them up with… A rooster vacuum gun? That's simply hilarious! Among this cluster, however, there is something that definitely captured my heart… And my taste for wanton destruction. When you manage to retrieve the one weapon I personally dubbed "Queen of Pwning" from the rests of giant G.U.N. battle mech and actually use it. In my view, nothing says "ultimate" like going on a super sonic rampage with a monstrous Gatlin machine gun that is freaking twice your side (which is cool and badass), unleashing unforgiving loads of bullets towards your pitiful opposition… Try beating the "G.U.N. Fortress" level with that weapon and you'll know what I mean. This videogame is the living proof that Chaos powered hedgehog + uber weapons = MASSACRE!!! Family game my ass…

1) Eye Impalement (God of War):

As you all should know, the Greek Mythology was wrong about several things: the Gods were deceptive and cruel, the Titans have been misunderstood and Hercules didn't kill the legendary Hydra… Kratos did, and in the most violent and badass fashion ever conceived by deranged human mind! Using just his trademark Blades of Chaos and his sheer strength he managed to FREAKING impale the FREAKING monster in the FREAKING wood pole of a rotten ship… Through its FREAKING eye! It died in utter and unconceivable pain, making the remaining heads explode like fireworks, fireworks of FREAKING blood! And the best part is… Those were just the first 20 minutes of the FREAKING game! This, my friends, is the most pwning thing I've ever seen in my gaming life! A mythological beast's impalement… Can anyone top that giant shish-kebab? I don't think so… Nobody pwns like a Spartan, that is for sure! THIS IS GOD OF WAR!!!

Hope you enjoyed my rather embarrassing display of fanboysm.