A.N.: Italics indicate that the TARDIS is speaking or thinking.
Chapter Seven: Unexpected Song
Zaphod had been even less help than the Doctor had anticipated. His pride wouldn't allow him to go ask Jack for advice on how to court Rose. He was sure any advice from the captain would involve threesomes, public nudity and more flexibility than most twenty-first century porn stars routinely exhibited. While he thought it was important for Rose to broaden her views on flexibility this wasn't an area in which she needed an immediate educational boost.
How about this for a novel approach ask our Rose what she likes, The TARDIS suggested suddenly intruding on the Doctor's thoughts. Go away, the Doctor thought back dismissively. A slight rumble in the air and the floor under his feet shaking gave him a graphic reminder of why it was never a good idea to tell the TARDIS to go away.
"All right, I'm sorry for telling you to go away but I can't take your suggestion."
Why not?
"It wouldn't be right." the Doctor answered crossly.
You mean it wouldn't be right because if you actually asked our girl what she found romantic you would no longer be so impressive in her eyes, the TARDIS countered wisely.
"That's not it at all."
If you say so.
The Doctor ignored the TARDIS' last comment and any others she chose to share with him while he went about plotting a course that would take them to the Powell Estates and Jackie Tyler. He hated to do it but he needed help and the best way to get it would be to take Rose home.