Chapter 5- Worry

Gohan reprimanded himself for chewing on his fingernails, but continued to do it anyway. It didn't make him worry any less, but he liked to think that it did. Nor would it change the result on his exam paper. If only he knew what it was, he wouldn't have to be worrying at all…

Chi-Chi was also worrying for him. What if the other kids had worked harder or started earlier? What if there were a disproportionate amount of genius kids this year? If he couldn't get into this school, she wasn't sure what his chances for university would be. That was what he wanted, right? To become a scholar, perhaps conduct research in biology. He always loved biology.

Gohan was sometimes able to be distracted by Goten when they played games that would help with the younger's training and schooling. However, Goten was a source of worry for an entirely different reason. Gohan hadn't slept very well for the past few days because he was unable to guarantee that he wouldn't start powering up in the middle of the night.

Gohan's constant anxiety eventually bothered Piccolo so much that he decided to pay the Son house yet another visit. It would be the third one in three weeks. He wondered if Chi-Chi would explode at him this time.

As soon as Gohan sensed both his intention and approaching Ki, an odd calm came over him. Piccolo was always able to help. Somehow, he did the appropriate thing even though he really had no idea how to deal with depression or other 'useless human things'. He smiled fondly. Piccolo might not do things in a conventional way, but it was the thought that counted.

Gohan closed the laptop Bulma had given to him a few years ago to help with research and finding the most up to date information. Well, that was the excuse she had given Chi-Chi about handing her son the biggest distraction known to student-kind: internet access. However, he wasn't exactly a social butterfly, so most of the time he actually was on there for study purposes.

Gohan changed into his gi and exited the house as Piccolo touched down outside. Chi-Chi didn't question where he was going because she knew he needed to do something to work off his pent up anxiety.

"Be back before sunset." She simply stated as he walked past her, slaving away in the kitchen as ever.

"Sure Mum, I wouldn't miss your cooking for anything." He replied, feeling he should thank her in some way for always working so hard. If she wasn't cooking or doing dishes, she was usually cleaning or teaching Goten.

She was somewhat surprised by his remark, but she smiled; pleased by his thoughtfulness. She just hoped he wasn't trying to butter her up so he could get away with something later, like Goku often tried to do.

"You want to spar, right?" Piccolo asked as Gohan made his way over to him. At Gohan's nod they headed into the mountains, hoping the altitude and treacherous terrain would give them both more of a challenge.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go all out today. I can't stop thinking about… it." Gohan replied, annoyed that actively trying to not think about the exam was making him think about it more.

Piccolo wasn't worried by this. He knew that 'all out' in Gohan's terms meant possibly turning Super Saiyan later. Without a dire situation, he would be unable to stop himself from holding back most of his true strength.

They paused and nodded at each other when they decided they were far enough away from the Son household. They landed on some relatively flat ground and Gohan did a few warm up exercises so that he wouldn't end up injuring himself. There was already a large crater here so they wouldn't have to worry too much about causing conspicuous damage, unless they got a little too enthusiastic with Ki beams.

"Ok, ready!" Gohan called, flying toward his ex-mentor, who immediately threw a round house kick when Gohan was close enough. Really, he should have seen that one coming; Piccolo didn't muck around. As soon as he said he was ready, the fight had begun. In his childhood, sometimes the fight began before he was ready, too.

As he recovered from the kick, which hardly hurt but still managed to send him flying a fair distance, he sent a beam of Ki in Piccolo's direction before quickly shifting behind him. Piccolo also shifted too quickly for the naked eye to see, effectively putting Gohan in the path of his own attack. Gohan ducked as soon as he realised what had happened and his Ki sailed by, barely missing him.

"That was stupid." Piccolo said bluntly, simultaneously sending a kick into the back of Gohan's head. However, his foot simply passed through an afterimage. He heard Gohan exhale loudly and whipped around to block the kick that was aimed at his temple. Another immediately followed, and was blocked, before Gohan's left leg came at his floating ribs. But it didn't stop there: a flurry of back fists, straight punches and knife hands to the neck were added into the barrage of kicks.

Piccolo was beginning to have a hard time keeping up, so he used his eye beams to distract Gohan long enough for him to get away and remove his weights. But Gohan was unforgiving and sped after him. He had the chance to remove training weights before their spar had begun, after all.

However, he wasn't about to catch Piccolo off guard. He soon found the cape and shoulder pads flying in his direction and blocking his view of Piccolo. He rose above them, only to have the weighted turban hit him in the face, instead.

"Piccolo!" He complained, touching his nose gingerly. But he soon found it wasn't broken, just a little sensitive. Well, if he wanted to throw weights around, he'd just have to fortify his body to be able to take it!

Gohan's aura immediately became visible and his hair and eyes changed from their usual pigment. He still wasn't sure how his body did that either, but he could investigate it another time. More importantly, he was stronger and better fortified now.

However, he knew Piccolo was as likely to wait around for him to transform as he had been to let him take off his weights. He immediately aimed an axe kick at the top of the Namek's head, but just ended up throwing himself forward into an afterimage. As he predicted, Piccolo was behind him, ready to strike him between the ribs.

Gohan whipped his feet over his head, actually managing to hook them under Piccolo's armpits, and threw him down toward the ground as he made a complete vertical turn. However, he did not anticipate that Piccolo would use the multiform technique at this point of the battle.

This time he was successfully kicked in the back of the head, plummeting toward the ground in a slight daze. The other half of Piccolo caught himself in mid-air and threw a ball of Ki at him. If the multiform allowed them to both be at full power, this may have been enough to get a decent hit on him. As it were, Gohan managed to pull himself together to deflect the relatively weak blast, calculating it to rebound and hit the half of Piccolo still above him.

To his surprise he actually succeeded, so he retaliated against the one hovering below him with a shortened version of Masenko. But he wasn't lucky twice. Piccolo disappeared from his line of vision. Before he could do anything about it, Piccolo joined to form one being, once again.

Gohan slowed his fall and touched down gently. He folded his arms and cockily stared up at Piccolo. He had willingly given up the high ground just to see what he would try next.

Piccolo ground his teeth, hating the way Gohan behaved when he was caught up as a Super Saiyan. He knew that, realistically, there was nothing he could do to faze his previous student all that much. But you didn't need to be a genius to see that a massive ego could be just as damaging as it was protective. It would be risky, but he was determined to take him down a peg or two.

He stared thoughtfully at the weights he had discarded earlier before charging his laser, er, Makankosappo.

"Really, Piccolo? Pretty sure I could just stand here and take that!" Gohan goaded, completely lost in the fight. Well, at least he wasn't worrying about his exams anymore…

Piccolo flew closer as he felt his attack was just about ready to be fired. He smirked as the yet unnoticed third part of his earlier multiform threw his shoulder pads at Gohan, using the cape to block his view of Piccolo once more.

However, it didn't work as well as it did last time. Gohan used his unreal energy reserves to simply fire something resembling a wall of Ki at the cape. This not only disintegrated the training weights, but also effectively blocked both Piccolo's attack and his other… third.

His other third was knocked backward by the shockwave from the blast alone, landing back in Piccolo. He groaned as the injuries caught up with him, but didn't show weakness as he darted back into the fray again.

Gohan hadn't expected him to rebound almost instantaneously, so in his panic he sent out another blast like the previous one, but it was slightly less intense. Piccolo tried to dodge the attack, but a twinge of pain in his left leg caused him to lose control of his jump at the last second. By the time he used his Ki to control his flight; the attack had already hit his left side.

This time he was more worried about his injuries, so he paused to check them. Gohan was lucky he was so durable; otherwise he would have also felt guilt about forever crippling one of the best friends he had. His obvious loss of limbs was more than enough to make Gohan snap back to himself.

"Shit," he began, raking his hand through his now short, black hair, "Are you ok?"

Piccolo didn't answer, but instead concentrated on gathering the little energy that remained to him. He did, however, open their mind connection back up again now that the spar was done with. He was rather blasé, hoping to make Gohan not feel guilty for once in his life. 'It will heal as soon as I recover the energy.'

He smirked up at his student, trying to reassure him in as many ways as possible. Gohan's mind seemed to be everywhere as he came down from his adrenaline high. He slowly accepted the fact Piccolo would be fine and that he shouldn't add this to his list of worries. Actually, he had had a lot of fun. It had been quite an exhilarating battle, despite the fact he outclassed his opponent so severely in terms of strength.

'I'm not useless you know.' Piccolo seemed to grumble in the background of Gohan's thoughts.

Gohan smiled at him warmly and placed a hand on his uninjured shoulder. "Here, you can take my Ki, right?"

Piccolo radiated gratitude before opening the channels to accept Gohan's offer. He didn't take all that was being offered; otherwise Gohan would definitely feel it in the morning.

Finally, Piccolo was confident enough to attempt a regeneration of such a scale, and ripped the remaining material of his pants away from the stump of his leg. He yelled loudly as he forced the energy out and the cellular division to begin. Gingerly, he moved his new fingers and toes to check the process had gone well. As usual, it was perfectly fine.

He smirked again and promptly fell back to rest on his elbows. No, he would not be moving very far for quite some time.

Gohan sat down and stretched his legs apart and began a warm-down once he was certain Piccolo would be alright. He felt a warm sense of amusement when Piccolo smirked like that. But he didn't seem to do it very often, especially when other people were around.

He recalled one of the first times Piccolo had been so openly kind: when he died because of Nappa. He was so glad his best friend had stayed since then.

He looked up when Piccolo began doing warm-down stretches as well. He looked at Piccolo's new leg, which he noticed was a slightly different shade of green to the other. He moved his gaze upward, looking at his pectorals. They were probably the most human muscles he had.

"I'm fine, really." Piccolo said, misinterpreting his gaze and curiosity. When Gohan realised that he was indeed looking for the sake of looking, and not out of concern, he became confused and automatically shut himself off again. What the hell was wrong with him? Maybe going Super Saiyan had messed with his head or something.

"Um, ok, that's good. I'd better go now mum said…" He mumbled and never finished the sentence as he absentmindedly flew away. There was still plenty of time left before sunset, but he had to get away and sort out his feelings… alone.

He felt Piccolo's Ki flare and move toward the Lookout. He felt guilty for not helping him in his injured state, but for some reason he felt too embarrassed to be around him right now. He landed on the window sill of his and Goten's room, grabbed the laptop off the desk he usually studied at, and flew off into the forest. Eventually he found a place that was both secluded and had decent reception, before he placed the laptop on a rock and began to do some research.

First he looked up the hormones he knew he had been releasing during the spar. Adrenaline, noradrenaline… it wasn't until he moved on to dopamine that he found something pertinent. It was some old research done by a woman called Helen Fisher^, which explained that releasing high levels of dopamine could cause feelings of romantic love.

Given how much fun he was having during their spar, it was plausible a rush of dopamine was causing him to feel different, or maybe just more openly. But why was he attracted to an alien, and an asexual one at that? Sure, he was humanoid, but really…

He sighed and let his thoughts wander, as he flew back home. It was now about the normal time he returned after spending a day with Piccolo. Inevitably his thoughts returned to thinking about the way he smirked at him, whether it was in triumph, or a reflection of actual sincerity. He shook his head sharply. Why was he thinking about that?

But his mind seemed to be off on its own course. Images of Piccolo's bare leg and then pectoral muscles came back to him. He also found something attractive about the shape of his trapezoids.

Not thinking straight, he entered his room through the window again. He didn't quite feel comfortable in his clothes. He ran out of his room and poked his head around the doorway into the kitchen.

"Hey mum, I'm just going to have a shower before dinner." He called before retreating into the bathroom. Chi-Chi was slightly perplexed by his behaviour, but let him go without any questions. Why hadn't he just come in through the front door?

He turned the shower on and stepped under the freezing cold water, trying to get rid of his thoughts and his problem. He rested his forehead against the cold tiles and sighed loudly. He wasn't sure how he could let Piccolo back into his mind with thoughts like this. Undoubtedly it would just freak him out and he'd never look at him in the same way again.

After an unusually quiet dinner, he went to bed early. He kept a firm wrap on his thoughts to ensure nothing would slip out. Occasionally he would feel Piccolo's questioning presence, but he didn't answer him.

When Gohan woke up the next morning, he was somewhat confused when he felt the Ki of three people in the kitchen. One was his mother and the other Goten, of course. But he was surprised when he realised the third was Piccolo. He was even more surprised that Piccolo and Chi-Chi were actually getting along. Well, she was actually allowing him to be in the house for a change, anyway.

He quickly got changed and decided to face the music. Obviously Piccolo was concerned if he had come this far out of his way just to check up on him.

"Morning Mum, Goten… Piccolo..." Gohan mumbled as he entered the kitchen. Chi-Chi visibly relaxed as her son entered the room.

"Gohan, I'm taking your brother to the library today. I'll have to teach him to read by finding something he enjoys, I guess. I have to get more food, too, so we'll be back around mid-afternoon. You can take care of lunch, right?" She explained, doting on him as ever.

He wondered if she was leaving later than usual because she didn't want to leave Piccolo in their house 'unsupervised'.

"Ok, see you later then." He replied, sounding unusually disinterested. He sat down at the table with a bowl, a box of cereal and a carton of milk. He found he couldn't quite bring himself to look Piccolo in the eye as he lined up his first bowl of cereal.

Chi-Chi and Goten soon left the house, leaving Gohan and Piccolo sitting opposite each other at the table. Piccolo shifted uncomfortably and Gohan continued to eat, not knowing what to say.

"Look, I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry, ok? Just tell me what's wrong and I won't do it again if it upsets you this much." Piccolo eventually ground out, sick of waiting for Gohan to say something or open up to him again.

Gohan finally looked up and gaped at Piccolo in surprise, his spoon falling from his now limp hand. He was surprised by both his apology and that he had led him to believe there was something to apologise for.

"I, um, I'm sorry Piccolo. It's not anything you did. I just don't think you want to know what I'm thinking right now…" He added vaguely, catching the spoon before it could clatter obnoxiously on the table.

Piccolo just sighed and rolled his eyes. "Look, I still don't think you get the point of this exercise. I don't care what it is, you're one of the few people who… actually has my respect." He grudgingly answered.

Gohan decided to put him out of his misery of having to word things, and opened their mind link again. He still covered what Fisher referred to as the lustful part of his thoughts, but it was better than being cut off completely. He didn't know what to think of that, let alone trying to explain it to Piccolo.

The first thing Piccolo got from Gohan was a very warm and comfortable feeling, as well as an implicit apology for overreacting. He was curious about this feeling and wanted to learn more about it. The word 'love' seemed to float around Gohan's brain before he quickly quashed it.

He flushed and turned away, dumping the already empty cereal box and milk carton in the bin and rinsing his bowl and spoon in the sink. Piccolo frowned, noticing the tenseness in Gohan's shoulders. Despite these warm feelings, he could tell Gohan felt something was missing, as though he wasn't entirely happy. Again, a word seemed to stand out in his thought process: 'reciprocate'.

This kind of love emotion had something to do with mating, didn't it? He actually hated to see Gohan feeling unfulfilled and beating himself up for his feelings. But he just didn't know how to reciprocate the feeling, or fully understand the purpose behind it.

Gohan seemed to answer him subconsciously, pretty much against his will if the constant thought quashing was anything to go by. He connected the feeling to physical contact. Running a hand through his hair, wanting to be physically closer, 'hug'…

He slowly approached Gohan, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable. He leaned back against the bench, folding his arms, and stared determinedly until Gohan looked up at him.

"I don't know what you want me to do." He said as he rested a hand on Gohan's shoulder, "But I'm willing to try it if it'll make you stop moping about."

Gohan looked away again, before changing his mind and turning to Piccolo to wrap his arms around his torso. He buried his face in his chest, embarrassed, and tried not to think too much about his muscle.

Piccolo hesitantly put an arm around Gohan's shoulders and put his hand on the back of his head with the other. His hair always fascinated him because Nameks didn't grow it.

"Well, you see, um…" Gohan began, trying to explain the why part of Piccolo's earlier question. "I guess this romantic love, or whatever you want to call it, exists because species like humans need to form an attachment so they'll stay together and raise some kids. I guess an influx of hormones is causing my brain to form an attachment with you."

Piccolo remained silent for some time, trying to process what Gohan was saying. He thought about how he could produce offspring on his own, so he'd probably never understand. But then, he didn't want to hurt him more either.

Cell had already done a number on his mental state. First by exacerbating his bi-polar tendencies and causing him to be depressed, then by probably having had a hand in the sudden and utter personality switch Gohan underwent when he transformed. Sometimes he wondered who had truly won that battle.

"Don't worry about it too much; apparently there are three different mindsets: attachment, romance and lust. You might be taking up all three right now, but it's possible for me to have each one allocated to a different person." Gohan added, speaking out loud because he was still more comfortable that way.

"All three?" Piccolo questioned, wondering about the last part.

Gohan blushed and pulled out of the somewhat awkward embrace, laughing nervously as he put the almost-dry dishes away. "Well, um, is there anything else you came for? I really need to, um…" He paused when he realised that just when he needed a convenient excuse, he didn't have any study obligations.

Piccolo took Gohan's sudden reinforcement of a particular mental barrier as a 'yes'. Instead of taking the hint and leaving, he carefully stepped around and back into his personal space, trapping Gohan in the corner that the bench formed. He watched with mild amusement as a blush engulfed his face and he began to stammer timidly. Nothing was really holding him there other than his own lack of assertiveness.

He leaned over him, subconsciously using his intimidating height to his advantage. He was actually trying to be comforting though, so he attempted to do this in human terms by placing his hands on his shoulders. "You don't have to hide from me."

"I-I… look, it's nothing you've done. I've barely come to terms with it myself." He stuttered out, staring down at the hands gripping his shoulders, rather than the Namek's eyes. "Besides, I'm only fifteen, well, turning sixteen soon I guess. I might think about doing it but that doesn't mean I'm actually ready to, you know… Not that I'd even know how- with you I mean- um…" He tried to move and put more space between them, feeling mortified enough for one day.

"If you want me to leave you alone, you just have to ask. After putting up with me for so long I thought you'd be rather more assertive." Piccolo added. He didn't move, despite the fact he knew very well that Gohan wished he would. He needed to learn to stand up for himself.

"Why do I need to be assertive? I can just tell you what I want with my thoughts." He reasoned, looking up and frowning.

"Just because you've been trodden on by your mother's overbearing attitude since birth, doesn't mean you should bend to others so easily. There's a difference between anger and assertiveness, you're only good at the former, it seems." He answered.

Gohan just looked away again, wondering when Piccolo became so sagely.

"Fusing with Earth's Kami has its advantages. I guess I technically have the life experience of four people now. You'll start realising you're missing out on the things you want if you don't be more assertive. I don't want you to realise that when it's too late to do anything about it." He said, pushing Gohan again.

He promptly fell on his backside… again. He tried to avoid hitting his head on the bench, but it was impossible since Piccolo had him backed into a corner.

"You can start by grounding yourself physically." He said, rolling his eyes and turning to leave the house. Gohan just laughed quietly. It seemed Piccolo wasn't all that mature after all.

^ - Helen Fisher is real, as is the information I've put down here. Her work is quite interesting and she has a fascinating lecture about the science of romantic love on TED if you're interested.

Thank you to everyone who leaves feedback. Please let me know if this chapter has any problems. I've read it so many times, I'm probably just automatically overlooking mistakes...