Derek stood looking at the ground. He couldn't bring himself to meet Stiles eyes. He knew all he would see is the hurt, sadness and worst the hate towards him in those big beautiful brown eyes.
"Sty, I don't know what you want me to say that I haven't already said a million times. I am truly sorry for going and getting blasted and sleeping with Danny. I am sorry for walking away from you. I am sorry Danny had my first cub and not you. I am just so DAM sorry!" Tears were streaming down Derek's face but he made no attempt to wipe them away. He wanted Stiles to see that he truly was sorry and that it hurt him to hurt Stiles. Stiles just stared at him no kind of expressions on his face he couldn't even feel any emotion coming of him like he normally could. It was like he no longer could read him and that scared him the most. Was this truly it for them? "No mate is still ours. We hurt him we need to fix it. We need fix mate. We hurt him!" Derek knew his wolf was right but was he going to do? How could he fix something he broke?
"Stiles...please say something...anything!"
"I woke up in my dorm room the other day with a hangover and some girls arm wrapped around my waist. Its something that has been happening a lot these past few months. I go and get super drunk and bring a girl home to have a little fun. I always turn to girls cause I know that they can not cause me pain. I am not attracted to them I just want to forget and for a little while I do. I feel for just a moment that my life is perfect and I am just another typical college student sleeping around and drinking. Then I wake up the next morning with a pounding headache and so much guilt. That's right every dame time I feel guilty for sleeping with someone that isn't you! Then I get angry at myself for feeling like that, there is no reason for me to feel guilty I haven't done anything wrong. I am not the one that ruined this. I am trying to forget this pain in my heart but the images just keep replaying in my mind. Danny under you as you fuck him, you filling him with your child. I wish that I could forget. DAMMIT I just wish it would all go away!" Stiles stopped talking and just stared up at the wall. Still no emotions playing on his face. It was like he was a ghost of who he once was and Derek knew it was his fault. He knew he damaged him.
"Stiles I know that you can not forget what I did and I wish I could take it all away for you. I wish I had just talked to you about marriage and not blown up at you the way that I did. I got scared though. I began thinking of how fucked up my life was before you came into it and it scared me thinking it could happen again. So I took my anger out on you and that wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that I put those fears on you. So I yelled, left, got drunk and made the biggest mistake of my life. I never went looking to hook up with Danny, it just happened and well now we have the most amazing son ever but its not enough. I don't have you. I need you Stiles, we all need you. Please don't leave again. I promise I will do anything you want me to do anything to make this better. I love you." With that last comment Stiles got up and moved to the front door. "Where are you going? Are you leaving again? DAMMIT Stiles you can't keep running away!"
"I'll be at my dad's." With that Stiles pulled open the front door and walked out. Well that had to be a good sign right? He wasn't leaving. Derek was going to do whatever he had to make sure Stiles never left again and he was going to win his heart back no matter how long it took him to do it.
Stiles walked into childhood home. He had to admit that he did miss it and his dad.
"Stiles? I thought you would be back in Vermont by now." Stiles dad walked out of the kitchen with a beer in his hand.
"Yea well I am staying, at least for now."
"Good! Its about time you came home!" With that both the Stilinski men went into the living room and watched a baseball game. Around 2am Stiles finally dragged himself up to his room to try and sleep. Minutes later he felt a warm body snuggling up next to him. He rolled over and smiled when he saw Lydia staring back at him.
"Hey Lydia."
"Hey, I am glad you are still here. Does this mean you are staying?"
"At the moment yes. Now I really want to sleep so if you are staying be quite, we will talk in the morning."
"Goodnight Stiles." Lydia leaned up and kissed Stiles on the cheek. They both fell asleep finally feeling like everything was back where it was suppose to be.
The next morning when Stiles woke up he was surprised to see Lydia had gone down and made breakfast. There was eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes and a cup of milk all waiting for him.
"Aww you didn't have to make me breakfast."
"After all those times you cooked for the pack I figured I owe you. Beside every since you left someone had to pick up the slack and its better me then Jackson or Scott."
"Yea those clowns wouldn't know how to boil water." Stiles smiled as he ate his breakfast. Lydia sat staring at Stiles feeling like all the pieces were finally back together.
"Stiles I have missed you so much." Lydia had a few tears that she was trying to wipe away.
"Oh Lydia, I have missed you too. I plan on staying at least till I know the everything is okay. I promise I wont leave again without at least saying goodbye." Lydia got up and crawled over to Stiles, she laid her head in his lap. She felt so at peace in his presence. She knew it was because her wolf felt at ease with him, he was her second in command, behind Derek. Her wolf would always know that Stiles was Derek's mate which made him alpha too and that would never change, no matter how long he was gone. She slowly drifted to sleep glad her pack/family was whole again.
Once Lydia feel asleep Stiles thought of everything that had happened since he had left. He tried filling the missing gaps of his family with students he went to college with but it was never the same as this right here, the real deal he didn't want to lose it again. Just then he heard a thump outside his window he looked up to see his best friend, his brother Scott.
"STILES! thank God you are still here!" Scott came running over and crashed into Stiles making him fall back onto his bed.
"Oww Scott! I was trying to sleep!" Lydia jumped awake.
"Sorry Lydia."
Just then Stiles felt four bodies on him.
"Alright enough! I can't breath." Stiles gasped for air to prove his point. All the wolves got off him. He looked up at them and couldn't help but smile.
"Jacks, Allison, when you guys get here?"
"We were right behind Scott, he just got a little carried away and took off before us." Jackson answered.
"Well as much as I love all of you why are you here at 8 in the morning, on a Sunday?"
"Its family day, don't tell us you forgot!" Allison replied.
"Right family day..." Stiles trailed off. Of coarse he didn't forget, he just figured they would all be at Derek's seeing as how he was their alpha. Just then Scott's phone rang.
"Hello...yes I know what day it is...yes I am with the rest of the pack...I don't know if I want to tell you...fine...no...no...no...dammit NO Derek I am not...FINE!...give us ten minutes...yea...whatever...bye!" Scott shut his phone and threw it at the wall.
"We gotta go!"
"Well I am glad you all stopped bye. Don't be strangers. You better go before your alpha goes all sour wolf and makes you watch that stupid documentary on wolves again." With that last comment all the wolfs groaned at the thought of watching that stupid 5 hour film on wolves that really had nothing to do with them. Derek just thought it would be cool to see how their other halves lived. Lining up they all hugged Stiles and then jumped out the window. Stiles stared out and watch until he couldn't make out Jackson's Porsche anymore. Well at least he got to spend family morning with his pack. He turned and went downstairs to clean up the mess for Lydia's breakfast.
A few hours later Stiles was in his kitchen getting dinner ready for when his dad came home. Just as he was putting the roast in the oven he heard the front door open. 'Dad must be home early' thought Stiles.
"I am in the kitchen dad, dinner will be ready in half an hour." Stiles turned around to greet his dad but that's not who he found looking back at him.
"Derek what the hell are you doing here? Are you trying to scare me? Dam you just about gave me a heart attack!"
"Sorry."
"Well what are you doing here? Aren't you suppose to be with your pack having family dinner?"
"Aww so you do remember!"
"Well ya since I was the one to first bring up the idea of family days every Sunday, plus the pack was here this morning" Stiles could see the look of confusing flash in Derek's eyes and just as quickly it was gone.
"That's why Scott wouldn't answer me this morning as to where they were. Why didn't you come with them? Its family day and you are family no matter what happens between us."
"I don't want to make it uncomfortable for anyone."
"You wouldn't, we all want you there!"
"Fine I don't want to make myself uncomfortable!"
"Why would you be uncomfortable? You belong just as much as the next person. I know the rest would be happy to have you there. Me too"
"And Danny?"
"What about Danny? He was the first to comment that you should be there. We all want you there, plus I want to really introduce you to my son."
"Yea okay, next week I will be there. Right now I am gonna spend the night with my dad, but next Sunday I am all yours."
"Promise?"
"Yea sure." Stiles turned back to face the stove praying Derek didn't pick up on his slight lie. Just as he turned he felt Derek come up behind him and put his hands on either side of him pushing him up against the counter.
"Der...what are you doing?" Stiles whispered out. Derek had his face pressed into Stiles neck just breathing in his scent, making Stiles get so caught up in the moment he forgot everything that was wrong between them. Stiles leaned back into Derek's strong chest loving the feel of his hot breath on his neck.
"Stiles you can't lie to me. I will be here Sunday at 7am to pick you up. You are not getting out of this." Derek turned Stiles around so he was facing him. One moment Derek was staring in his eyes and the next he was capturing his lips and kissing him with such determination and the next moment Derek was walking out the front door. Stiles brought his finger up to his swollen lips stunned at what just happened.