I rested my chin on the palm of my hand and stared as a mosaic pattern of sunshine danced across the ivory keys of the piano.
If I closed my eyes, I could hear the rustling of the trees as the wind blew through them—it was all its own music. I reached out my hands until my fingertips brushed against smooth coolness.
I pressed down.
One clear note rang throughout the room, reverberating against my bones, sending a jolt of familiar exhilaration up my body and into my brain.
I pressed another key and another and another before my hands were flying across the keyboard and the sound of rustling leaves and dancing sunlight echoed against the walls in the form of tinkling piano keys.
I opened my eyes slightly and gazed down to see my fingers flitting across the keyboard.
"Piko-chan."
I started, my hands slamming ungracefully across several keys.
What….?
Looking out the window, I stared out at the scenery. Was I hearing things?
"Piko-chan, you play so well."
My heart stuttered.
No..
Why was I remembering this? Why now?
Not again…please…
Not today…
My eyes burned with the warnings of tears and my fingers shook where they were on the ivory keys.
What?
Why was I…?
Why now?
No…
"You make mommy proud, Piko-chan. So, so proud."
I clapped a hand over my ears and collapsed in on myself. No!
NO!
"Piko-chan, remember what mommy told you…death isn't the end. Know that I will be with you. Always."
Always?
No, no, no…
"Mommy…"
My voice was pitiful, small; so much like it had been as a child.
Broken. Lost.
"Mommy…!"
"Worthless child. You have no use to me if you cannot play."
I fell to the ground, the pain not even reaching me. The pain in my head…in my heart…it was already too much. Why…why was this happening to me?
"No…no!"
"Play, you stupid brat."
"No…no…Papa, please no…"
Slowly, I curled into a ball, just like used to when I was a child and stared painfully at the dancing mosaic patterns of light and shadow against the floor.
I began to close my eyes when I heard the door slide open.
"Piko!"
I didn't bother to look so I let my eyes close. I smiled.
"Gakupo-sensei."
Warm hands lifted me up.
"Piko-chan…Mommy's got you."
A dull pang of pain shot through my stomach.
"Piko. Stay awake."
I chuckled, dry and humorless.
"Sensei. Please…just take me away."
I opened my eyes slightly and turned to the piano, indescribable pain and sorrow and anger coursing through me as I stared at the elegant shadow it cast. I closed my eyes and let the image sear into my brain.
"Please. I can't…anymore…"
The light shone against the pristine and unfeeling ivory keys.
"Piko-chan."
"You ungrateful brat."
"Please…not today."
The fast pace of the guitar coursed through my veins and I was alive.
I grasped onto the headphones tighter until all I could hear was the music and the rhythm, the beat the emotion.
Lies circle around today again
And in this town that makes love
It eats dreams and heads for tomorrow
I let my voice soar and I closed my eyes as the music rippled all around me.
We who want something
Is swallowed with pain
And is drunk on love
I imagined the emotion the person in the song was feeling.
Unrequited passion, unenthusiastic lovers, a man who would do anything for his love.
I neared the microphone until my nose touched the latticed surface as I became the man. A man in love with a fiery passion and an easily corrupted heart.
If I call and pull you in
I know you don't really hate it
Just forget everything
And leave everything to me
Tonight, I want to hold
Only you
Even the black hair that becomes messy in the rhythm
Even those dawn-like eyes
Even the past and the present that is covered with lies
Even the bursting pain of the chest
After changing to someone else
You'll forget it
Faster and faster, I felt like spinning, dancing like fire and hot wind.
Even if I become corrupt
I can't see anything from that place anymore
Aside from you and me
To the point where you can't distinguish
From reality or dream
I think surely we being together
Is a good thing
Rather than living in this world
Where everything is dirtied
If it's to the point everything is simply forgotten
Then hold me almost so that I'll break
The warm wind
Embraces you and me
Saying "I love you"
I wonder how the real one is?
Saying "Please stay the way you are right now"
I didn't say those words
But still show me
Your true self
Trivial pass
Is already gone
Forever continuing time
Is surely unreasonable
So at least
Stay like this
I opened my eyes and instantly met sparkling blue ones filled with wonder, awe and…
Even if this is fake love
It's still "love"
The last words slipped from my tongue as I stared into those strikingly blue eyes, my mind coming undone.
The guitar finished strumming and plucking, leaving the recording studio in odd silence. I instantly felt like I was released from the pull and emotion of the music but I continued to watch those eyes.
Those eyes…
"Len~!"
I jerked out of my reverie and looked around for the voice. Oh, geez, don't tell me it's—
A blur of teal on teal crashed into my chest, effectively knocking the air from my lungs.
Oh, geez.
Miku.
I managed a smile and smoothed down her hair.
"Hi, Miku-chan."
She grinned prettily and I couldn't help but smile back. Her grip tightened.
"You sang that so well, Len-chan!"
I grinned as well and scratched the back of my head.
"Yeah, thanks. I was—"
Wait. I looked back at the recording studio window, hoping to catch a glimpse of those eyes again. Familiar, they were so familiar.
But they were gone.
And so was the person who held them.
I sighed in disappointment before turning back to Miku as she tugged on my hand.
"C'mon, let's practice Magnet!"
I exhaled in exhaustion.
And smiled.
"Okay."
I power-walked down the halls, a bright blush on my face.
Wow.
Just…wow.
Who knew he sang so…so…magically.
Is magically the right word?
More like…godly.
He sings like an effing god.
And he was so into it too.
All those high notes and the emotion behind his voice…it's like he was singing especially for me.
It was amazing.
And then when he opened his eyes.
He stared right into mine.
My face nearly melted off.
His gaze was so…intense and so…so…passionate.
I threw myself at a wall, too busy trying not to melt into a puddle of goo to notice all the weird stares I got.
I can't believe it…
I can't believe it…
Now I know…why he's so famous…
I pressed my forehead into the cool plaster and sighed.
Ok, get a grip, Rinny.
And honestly, you weren't even supposed to be in there.
I pouted.
How was I supposed to know that that wasn't the bathroom?
Still…
I slapped my hands into my burning cheeks.
WOW.
JUST…WOW.
I felt a weird stirring in my heart.
Like a weird ba-thump.
I swallowed nervously.
Ah…
The bell rang all of a sudden and I turned around at the sound of classroom doors sliding open. Anxious to avoid a crowd, I skittered down the hall and up the stairs to where I memorized was my first period classroom with Gumi and Mikuo.
Mikuo had gone to his songwriting class and Gumi had run off towards another corridor that I didn't know. I was pretty much left alone by myself since I didn't have a fourth period on my schedule. So I explored.
I climbed the stairs with thoughtful hums before finally reaching a floor I hadn't seen before. Peeking down the hall, I saw it was a pristine white with one long window running alongside the wall. There was only one door on the very end. It was a big door and on closer inspection, I saw it was old and the paint was chipping off at some places. Curiosity got the best of me and I reached for the dulling bronze handle and turned it.
The door handle turned with a creak before opening wide into a large room with one large window reaching the ceiling. The walls were light blue and a desk stood in the corner. As I stepped in, I saw a large white curtain surrounding…a bed?
Moving closer, I reached out and pulled the curtain back.
I gasped when I saw who was in the bed.
Snowy-white hair laid spread out on a pillow like pure white sky, a serene look on a flawlessly pale face. So fragile and so…sad.
I felt my heart clench in confusion and worry and…fear.
Piko…Piko, was he…?
Was he sick?
Was something wrong?
Before I knew what I was doing, my hand reached out and touched his cheek.
Warmth flooded my fingertips and I found myself smiling in a relief that threatened to crumple me to the ground.
Suddenly, he stirred.
And opened his eyes.
Glassy blue and green met my gaze and I froze my hand still on his cheek.
A moment of silence passed as we stared at each other.
Then he smiled.
"Mommy…"
My eyes widened. Mommy…?
One pale hand reached up to hold mine tenderly.
"Mommy.."
Warm wetness dripped onto my hand and I realized he was crying. Piko?
His eyes were still open but only slightly now as tears leaked from them. His grip was tighter now and I could feel him shaking. I couldn't do anything but watch as if I was on the outside looking in.
"Mommy…please don't leave me again."
Those whispered words both scared me and saddened me to an extent that I didn't understand.
Leave?
Mommy?
I don't know what possessed me to but I leaned down and stroked his soft hair with my free hand, humming comfortingly. I gripped his hand gently in mine.
"Don't worry, Piko-chan. Mommy will always be with you." I whispered.
His eyes closed then and a wobbling smile graced his face, tears still streaming down his cheeks.
I stroked his hair tenderly and felt a tear of my own slide down my cheek and onto our entwined fingers.
"I promise." Those last words just slipped from my mouth without a second thought, as if they belonged.
His grip loosened then and his fingers slipped from mine, falling back onto the bedside.
I could only gaze at his now peacefully sleeping face as a flurry of strange, unwanted, unexpected emotions coursed through me.
Tears fell freely from my eyes and I didn't even know why.
My heart shivered with a pain I didn't understand.
Every part of me cried for this poor boy I wanted to know, to understand, to comfort.
His sadness seemed familiar.
And I didn't know why.
I looked down at him and I couldn't take it.
I ran out the door, down the hall, the stairs.
I don't know where I was going but I just ran.
I ran and I ran until the tears blurred my vision.
Did I know this sadness once upon a time?
I found myself outside soon enough and I only stopped running when I tripped and fell onto the soft grass of an empty clearing. I lay there, crying and crying my heart out for something I didn't understand and for a boy I barely knew.
The afternoon rays of the sun seeped into my skin until my sobs turned to quiet sniffles and then into aimless staring, my eyes still raw and burning.
I rolled over onto my back and stared at the leaves rustling in the wind. The light streamed through them, creating a dancing mosaic of light and shadow on the grass. I closed my eyes and imagined a light tinkling piano playing away on the breeze.
Slowly, I fell into a peaceful darkness with the sounds of the wind and a sweet, simple piano melody lulling in my ears.
AbomiT: Sorry,sorry,sorry! OTL
I know this is looong overdue but school is a big pain.
And…and…I dunno. ORZ
I have no excuses. :c
This chapter seems to be all over the place and angsty. It's pretty much meant to be a little peek into Piko's psyche.
So, yah, angsty.
It'll get better soon, I promise!
Oh, the song Len sang is called "SheSaw Day". It's absolutely amazing! :D I put it in English because I thought it was more impactful.
Please vote on the poll because it looks like it's leaning towards "Romeo and Juliet".
Thank you all for your patience!