This can go so wrong

She stopped, because she didn't know how to continue. How to tell him this? But she had to go on, because his expression was so full of pain. What did he think she was going to say? Surely not what she had on her mind. Abby took a deep breath, steeling herself for making the most embarrassing statement of her life.

Xxx

After Shea had made her accusation – that she had an affair with Henry – her thoughts had been spinning. Initially, she'd been shocked by the assumption. Henry loved Trish, and she loved Jimmy. That's all there was to the situation. Then doubts had began to surface. She was so afraid to be alone, to face her complete and utter loneliness, and he offered her the safety that she needed. That incident in the kitchen – and why did it feel so natural, so right to sleep in his arms every night?

And superimposed on the Henry walking beside her in the woods, she saw an image of him as she'd seen him in the bathroom a few days ago - naked, except for a towel. Naked, and definitively... sexy. She swallowed, realizing that maybe, maybe she wasn't as opposed to the idea of being with him as she had thought previously. Perhaps this was only a natural step - them being so close, so intimately entwined in each others life now, and after all she had no one else but him in her life anymore.

Plagued by guilt – what about Jimmy - she walked beside Henry, almost burning with shame. Sick to her guts for thinking like this – merely weeks after meeting Jimmy again and no less after his horrible death. Oh, how did she end up in this situation?To even consider sleeping with her best – and only – friend?

Stealing a glance at Henry, she saw he was preoccupied by his own thoughts, a worried frown on his face. Though it pained her quite a bit to admit it, she managed to say it to herself: She wanted him. Just as she thought that, he grabbed her hand, and she jumped a mile high by the shock, feeling his touch as electrifying. She could see that her reaction hurt him, but there was no way she'd tell him that she wanted him outside in the woods, just like that.

Xxx

"You were right, earlier. And I was wrong", she said. He just stared at her, completely baffled.

"I was right? About what?"

"About... us. The other night, in the kitchen."

Did she mean...? He stood stock still, not daring to move. If he misunderstood and made the wrong move now, he'd be doomed in her eyes, he was sure.

"You know, when you... and I said it was wrong, and you asked why. I don't know anymore, I was wrong."

He felt stirrings of hope inside. She was actually saying that she didn't see any reason not to be with him? Still he didn't say anything, just looked at her.

"Help me out here, Henry!" she said impatiently, "You know what I mean! I – I think, I..." she stopped again, and squared her shoulders before looking straight into his eyes. The word rushed out: "I want you!"

He could not believe it, but in two quick steps he was holding her, pressing her to him with all his strength, crushing her almost breathless. He always thought he'd have to seduce her, not having her telling him straight out that she wanted him. But then there was no more room for thinking, as he was kissing her fiercely – and she was kissing him back.

Xxx

The kiss was more passionate than she had expected, and she broke it off, gasping for breath while shivering with pleasure. She pulled his mouth to her again, stroking her hands through his hair. His hands cradled her butt, stroking her hips. Wanting more, she opened his shirt, and he shrugged out of it, and then she had contact with his bare skin. Kissing his neck, stroking his back, feeling him muscles move as he shifted his grip – she just couldn't be close enough to him.

"Abby, oh, Abby" he mumbled her name almost feverishly over and over, kissing her throat, even biting her a little. She leaned her head back, letting him move his mouth across her neck and down to her shoulders.

"Henry, it's so good," she sighed back, clinging to him, letting out a small moan.

Abruptly he shifted his grip on her, saying in a hoarse voice:" You want this, Abby, are you sure?"

She half-laughed at him, whispering "Yes, what do you think? I can't wait, Henry!".

His breath hitched, and he wasted no time in carrying her up the stairs, and to put her down on the bed. Clothes fell, being ripped off in the process, and she moaned his name loudly as he touched her skin. Then he was there, entering her, and she gasped – meeting his eyes.

"Don't hold back," she urged him, moving in time with him. As his thrusts became more powerful, her abdomen clenched around him, starting to spasm. She writhed underneath him, feeling him hard and moving fast inside of her. It felt as if she caught fire, and wave after wave shook her. In the midst of her orgasm, she heard him cry out her name, and looking up into his eyes, she felt like drowning as he poured out into her.

Xxx

He tried to regain his breath, still inside her. This was more than amazing – in every respect. Here he had been ready to lock her up to convince her that being with him was a good idea, and she had already decided that she wanted him. Wasn't she just perfect?

Smiling down at her, he said the only thing that came to mind: "Wow. I never thought it would be like this."

She laughed a little, breathless herself, and answered: "Agreed. This was unbelievable. In every way."

Feeling her belly still twitch with small aftershocks, he pulled himself out a little reluctantly. Moving over to the side, he enfolded her in his arms. He still couldn't believe it – she was his now, and he'd make sure it was for forever.

She gasped, smacking her brow with one hand, and instantly he was worried again.

"Henry, I'm so stupid! Do you know, I'm sorry, I'm not on the pill – this was completely unprotected!"

Blinking, he said: "Well, I didn't ask, did I? It's as much my fault as yours. Besides, you know, I'm not going anywhere, no matter what happens. We'll deal with it – if something happens."

She looked slightly relieved, before smiling a little. "I could always go to the pharmacist here on the island, asking for a morning-after pill. That'll be a great way to announce to everyone that we're having sex!"

He laughed. "Yeah, rumor will fly across the island in no time. But we're going back to the mainland tomorrow, aren't we?"

"I suppose that will be within the time limit. In the meantime – why not make the most of it? We can do it again, can't we?" Her grin was mischievous, and he felt a sharp sting of arousal again. She wanted him again! He just loved her so much.

Xxx

She watched him sleeping, a happy smile on his face. As for herself, she was more unsure. She wanted to be with him, but she couldn't figure out what it meant.

Was she only afraid to be alone, now that she had no one else? Was the sex only an addition to the intimacy they experienced comforting each other? Was this the start of something more than friendship? She just didn't know.

Maybe she would figure it out in time. She knew he'd never pressure her into anything – that was one advantage of having her best friend as her lover. But could she rid herself of the overwhelming guilt she felt? Deserting Jimmy's memory like that, after such a short while... A small voice in the back of her head told her she needed something else to think of than grief and guilt. Maybe this was just an escape from the horrors, and nothing more?

Xxx

On the boat back to Seattle, she worried about meeting Shea again at the Wellington funerals.

"Don't fret, Abby, it doesn't matter what she believes or thinks", he told her, smiling kindly at her. "We don't have to tell her, and really it's none of her business."

Still, she was scared. "What if she calls us out, telling everyone..?"

"Abby, stop. This is Shea. Of all the people we know, she's the least likely to play drama queen in her father's funeral! She's only going to frown at us. Nothing more! Trust me, Abby."

She calmed down, but only a little, grasping his hand. "Where are we going to stay in Seattle? In your apartment?"

Looking pensively at her, he shook his head. "No, it's full of her things. I... I don't even want to see the place again, I'll sell it. Buy myself someplace else."

"Oh. I can understand that. It must be... I can't imagine." she whispered, leaning her head on his arm.

"I booked us in a hotel. Two rooms."

Shocked, she drew her head up and stared at him. "What? Two rooms?"

He laughed at her outraged expression, and kissed her before saying: "Adjoining rooms. With a door between. Just for the sake of appearances."

"You had me there," she laughed, a little ashamed. "I wouldn't want to be without you."

At that, she could only describe his expression as adoring – like it was the best thing he'd heard in his life.

Xxx

Standing by JD's grave, he had his arm comfortably around her shoulder. He'd placed JD in the Dunn family grave, along with Uncle Marty and his adoptive parents. Looking at the stone, he wondered how many people who had committed a double patricide in the history of the world, the way he had: His real father, and the man he had thought to be his father while growing up. Maybe it was a world record? Nah, this couldn't be the first time something like this had happened. Still he felt a little proud, knowing that at least it was a rare feat. Squeezing Abby's arm, he put on his sad expression.

"Ready to leave?" she asked.

"Yeah," he sighed by way of response.

Xxx

Shea's attitude to them at the funeral was frosty, to say the least. But she didn't say anything, except glaring at them both – especially at Abby. Henry was in the front row with Shea and the remaining Wellingtons – not that there were so many of them left, she thought. She watched him all through the ceremony, and her heart bled for him, seeing him so downcast and serious-looking. But to her own horror, she also felt a slight twinge of jealousy, and she forced it down quickly.

Xxx

At the reception, Madison skipped over to them, with her usual, eerie smile: "Uncle Henry - though you won't be my uncle now, will you – I think you're touching Abby even more than you did with auntie Trish."

Abby swallowed, visibly unsettled by Madison. He felt his eyes narrow in dislike for the little girl, wishing that his Dad had killed her in the tunnels. Putting on a friendly smile, he said to her: «I like Abby. She's my friend, and she has been for as long as I can remember.»

«Yeah, but you don't look like friends!»

«Madison! Madison! Come over here», Shea's voice was strained, and she looked pointedly away from them. Madison thankfully obeyed, and he let out a sigh. To think that such a small girl could be so creepy!

He got worried when he saw Abby's face. She whispered to him: «Is it that obvious? To be found out by a nine year old?»,

"No, Shea set her up, you realize that, don't you?"

"She thinks I'm the culprit" she whispered to him, and he nodded. Oh, he'd kill Shea for disturbing Abby like that!

"That's probably easier for her to think that, than me... Well, never mind her, Abby! It doesn't matter. She can't hurt us."

Still, he felt a tiny, nagging worry: Abby's feelings for him were so new, so fragile – could Shea's behavior destroy her budding emotions? He needed to remove her from Shea as soon as possible.

Xxx

This time, even she thought it a good idea to go back to Harper's Island. She had to take care of her father's house, and they also needed to get away from the flare of media interest in the wake of the funerals.

"Henry! You don't have to do everything for me – I'm capable of getting my hands dirty too, you know!", she said exasperatedly as he once again took a cardboard box out of her hands. They were cleaning out the attic, and he insisted on carrying all the boxes downstairs for her.

"The boxes are heavy, and I'm almost done - there's only a few left. You don't have to wear yourself out by carrying heavy stuff, Abby. I'll take care of that!" She just shook her head at him, trying to no avail to get her box back.

Thankfully, the police had previously removed all the files on Wakefield from the attic, but there had still been lots of her mother's belongings up there.

"I'm not sure what all this is. You know, she liked to collect everything, so I guess the contents will range from newspaper clippings, old drawings, museum tickets and whatnot," she said, sighing a little.

«I can skim through it», he said, "and if I find anything interesting, I'll show it to you. OK?»

Xxx

She paused, looking at the boxes as he opened the first one.

"I wonder.." her voice faltered. Seeing tears in her eyes, he jumped up, embracing her.

Hiding her head into his chest, she clung to him, before continuing.

"I wonder, what would she think of...us, now?"

He was sure she'd be appalled and disgusted. And even more horrified, if she knew he'd followed in his father's footsteps as a killer, and that he'd killed off everyone to get Abby completely to himself. But he was different than his Dad, he'd never abuse the woman he loved. But wasn't killing everyone she loved just that – abusive? There was probably nothing in the world that could hurt her more than what he'd done to her. But it had been necessary, and he'd never hurt her in any other way. Shrugging the thoughts off, he said: "I guess we'll never know, Abby."

"Yeah, you're right. Still I'd like to know. But she really loved you. Dad did too – I think he'd be happy. What do you think your parents would've said?"

He smiled down to her, saying: "They'd be thrilled. They loved you, you know." Heh, they'd be just as shocked as Sarah Mills. But they had cared a lot for Abby.

"And... JD?"

"JD... He loved you, Abby, I think he would approve. You should know that, the two of you were just as close as JD and me."

"Mmm, yeah, I always considered JD like my brother. I think he'd like it."

That hit a little too close to home for his liking, and he had to ask: "Sooo, you never saw me like a...brother?"

"You?! No, Henry, that... If I did, I wouldn't be having sex with you! That would be just plain disgusting and freaky. Eeeew." Her mouth wrinkled at the corners.

He felt a little like laughing hysterically at her offended expression – after all, this wasn't something he liked to think of. In fact, he hated to think of it.

"No, I've always just seen you as Henry. You as a person – my friend, but never like a brother. I don't know why," she told him.

"Likewise. It's just you, Abby, just you as yourself."

As she was busy downstairs, he rifled through the boxes as fast as he could, desperately seeking for one specific item: His adoption papers. He supposed Sarah Mills would have kept some sort of proof, somewhere, and he was immensely relieved when he found it. Pocketing the papers, he was happy to go through the rest more slowly, picking out things that he thought Abby would like to keep.

"Hey Abby, look at this photograph, it's us! From when we were little. She wrote about us on the back!" He beamed at her, showing her the picture, before reading the text on the back to her:

Abby playing with Henry, ages seven and nine. They are best friends, having so much fun together, and I love seeing that. I hope they'll always stay close – being together forever.

"Oh. Oh, Henry, it's like – it's like a blessing! From my Mom! This means a lot to me, thank you for finding this." Her eyes became full of tears, but he kissed them all away.

Xxx

Later in the evening, he returned to the house, after another successful fishing trip. Seeing Abby, he was again struck by her beauty. She was sitting in the middle of the couch, pale as usual and dressed in a black, tight, knee-length dress, clutching something in her hands. But she looked upset?

"What's wrong?" he asked worriedly, dropping his catch to take her hands, kneeling in front of her.

"This. What's this, Henry? What have you been doing?"

God no, Sarah Mills hadn't kept anything else, had she? She hadn't written down anything about him, had she?