One Step At A Time

Chapter 5

They stood their both shocked to the core, Haley not to sure if what she thought, she heard was actually what she heard, or was her mind playing tricks on her. He killed someone,. That couldn't be right, he didn't look like a killer, In reality she knows there really isn't no type, she watches the news, murder come in all shapes, sizes and race, anyone could be a killer, regardless to what they look like or what their background is...Especially, in this day in time.. But something wasn't sitting right with her.

Lucas found himself on the same page as Haley, He figured he was in jail for something little, or stealing cars, robbery, all kind of things with through his head, but not murder.. Nathan wasn't the murdering type, he couldn't have done it...

" I think he's lying.." Haley said, causing Lucas to come out of his thoughts.

" I was thinking the same thing..." he told her both giving each other concerns looks.

"But why would he lie to us, why tell us he killed someone if he didn't? it doesn't really make sense." Haley questioned, Trying to come to the understanding of things, the guys she has talked for the past month, couldn't have killed someone, not on purpose.

Lucas pulled out his phone, " I'm going to google it..." he said, trying to find some info. He typed in Nathan Sawyer, with forty hits popping up...His eyes widen, at the headline. " Sixteen year old, Nathan Sawyer's dream of playing in the NBA was cut short last night, When the young basketball player, shot in killed a man and cold blood..." Lucas readied out loud.

"Wow!" Haley said knowing that he was telling the truth...She thought for a moment, still not believing it. " Maybe it wasn't his fault.."

"Haley it says he shot a man in cold blood, it sounds like he knew what he was doing." Lucas replied,

"Maybe it was one of those, in the wrong place at the wrong time things." Lucas sighed, as he continue to try in find information on it..." I need to talk to Peyton.." Haley said, as she started to walk to her car..

"Where you going?"

"I'm going to Peyton's I need to talk to them, I need to know what really happen., I can't and I won't believe what is on the internet, Luke there is more to the story, I know there is..The guy I have talked to the last month isn't a murder, I can feel it.." Lucas thought a moment, knowing she was right, maybe it wasn't his fault, maybe he took the fall for someone else, " Luke, we were always told to never judge someone if we have never been in their shoes, never judge a situation unless we have facts, and always look for the good in people, So that.s what I'm doing, and mom would want you to do the same thing..."

" I know, but..." he trailed off still not convinced

" Look, I know what you feel about me and Nathan, but I also believe that deep down you actually like the guy, that's why he's still working for you, Cause if you really didn't like him, you could of fried him anytime, but you didn't...

He throw his head back in defeated, knowing she was right, he did like Nathan, " You know where they live?"

She smiled at him, "Yeah, follow me." she yelled, as the both got in their cars...

Peyton erased Scott's name from her phone. After sending him that text message. She grabbed her laptop and climbed in her bed... She logged onto the dating website and deleted her account. She then deleted all the emails, chats, and anything Scott/ Lucas sent her. She closed the laptop laid it on the floor, before throwing herself backwards on the bed. She reached for Mr. Sunshine her stuffed monkey that her dad gave her when she was five. She hugged it tightly to her. As she cried... Not only tears for her dad who she misses daily, but for what she though could have happen with Scott, and for her friendship with Haley. Now that Haley knows Nathan was in prison she won't want to be around her anymore, Just like Brooke did..

" Mr. Sunshine really?" Nathan joked walking into her room.

" He calms me down.." she said, in a child like voice...

Nathan give her a small smile, " got us a pizza and some beer."

" I'm not hungry "

" Peyton, you need...

" I miss him.." she cried, interrupting him

" What?"

" Dad.. I miss him more everyday." she sat up. " I thought it would get easier as the years go on, but it seems like it's getting harder..."

Nathan sat down beside her pulling her into a hug. " I know peyt, I miss him to."

" God, life would have been so different it he was still alive. " she cried.,,, ." you would be this huge NBA star... And I would probably be able to let people in... Have real friends... Probably even fall in love."

" Peyton we can't live in the past anymore, "

" I'm sick and tired of holding my head high, and acting like everything is fine, and that I'm just a normal twenty-six year I'm not... truth be told all I want to do is breakdown and cry, I want to hide from the world..."Nathan rubbed her back, gently...Knowing how much this emotional turmoil torn her apart, both mentally, and emotionally.. Pain hurts for a minute but mental destruction kills for a lifetime. " I wish my brain had a deleted button so I could erase the things I want to forget..."

" Hmm, I think a lot of people wish that..." he said, as he pulled away from her, so he could look at her. " We cannot change the past Peyton, believe me I would give anything and everything to change what happen to you, But I can't, just like you can't change it for me, Playing the what if game is getting pretty old, We got to fine the strength to forgive and rebuild and move froward... Cause if we don't that son of a bitch wins...And I refuse to let him..."

Peyton nods, knowing her brother is right, knowing she needs to let it go, she needs to start letting people in, she can't expected to find love if she to scared to get close to anyone.." I really thought that Scott, I mean Lucas. " she corrected herself. " Was different, he seems so caring and understanding, like I could tell him anything, and he would understand. I thought he would be the first to accepted my past. " she wiped away a few tears that had fallen, " Haley to on some level, I knew you two would hit it off, and I thought she could be your one, " she sighed, " I'm a strong person, but every once in a while. I would like someone to take my hand and tell me that everything's going to be alright."

Nathan tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, "One day you'll find someone who doesn't care about your past, because they want to be your future."

They locked eyes, she gave him a small but sad smile, " You to Nate, you're find someone to.. I know you will, ..." She stopped, as the knocking on the door stops their conversation...

"Who could that be?" Nathan said, leaning over in kissing her forehead. Before walking out of her room, as he walked out of the room, heading for the front door. He looked out the peep-hole. His eyes widen,

"Who is?" Peyton's asked.

He looked over at her, " Just go back to bed, I'll send them away.." he didn't want them getting her all worked up anymore tonight, he already knows that with the mood she's in she will be having that nightmare tonight. She didn't need any more stress.

" Who is it Nate?" she asked again.

He sighed, " it's Haley and...Lucas.." he watches as the look of surprise echos her face. " Look I'll send them away." she nods, Nathan opens the door, " Look, we don't wan...

" We are sorry, " Lucas said, cutting him off, Haley elbowed him "Well, not we, cause she didn't do anything, I'm sorry man, I over reacted, "

Nathan shook his head, " Why are you really here?"

" To tell you I'm sorry, and...

" We don't believe you killed someone.." Haley blurted out.

Peyton's eyes widen.."You told them!" she exclaimed. As she waked to the door, staring at her brother, shocked that they knew the reason...

" Yeah, I did I figured It would get them out of our life faster, like it did with everyone else."

" They...know...everything" she asked in an annoyed voice

Lucas and Haley shared a concern look, " I can't believe you, we promised to never tell anyone, unless we were together, I can...

Nathan pulled her away from the door, "I didn't tell them everything, just the part about me, they know I was sixteen and they know I killed someone..That's it.. I have never and will never tell a living soul about what you went through. "

She sighed loudly, relieved. " Oh, thank you...but why did you tell them..."

" Look, we aren't going anywhere till we get some answers," Haley said from the door way.. Peyton looked over at them, part of her wanted to slam the door in their faces, but the other part, kind of wanted to hear what they have to say...

" Invited them in..."

"No I..." he started but stopped at the look Peyton gave him.."Fine..." he said, then turn towards the door, "Please come in."

They walked in taking the sits Peyton pointed to, Haley sat beside Lucas on the red couch, the walls in the studio apartment were red to, which made Haley smile. Lucas looked around at the art all over the living room. " Wow! those are amazing.." he said, causing Peyton to look at him, for the first time since he arrived.

" Thanks.." she whispered, as she sat down in the far off chair away from the two.." Look, we don't need you sorries, you're not the first people who found out about Nathan's past in leave our life as fast as the can, and you guys won't be the last."

"Well we aren't other people" Haley said staring at Peyton. " I cherish our friendship Peyton,and I don't want to lose it, and Nathan." she said, looking at him, " I haven't been this happy just talking to a guy in years, I like you a lot,and I want to get to know you, the real you.."

" What about you brother Haley, cause apparently he has issues with Nathan been in prison., and now that he knows he killed someone, I bet he will do anything, to keep you two from each other."

" Look, I'm sorry Peyton, for what I said. I like Nathan, and yes the thought of him been in prison was eating me alive..."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Nathan said.

" I don't know man, I just figured it really wasn't by business, and we had so much in common, I liked hanging out with you and I really didn't have a problem with your past. I just didn't like the idea of you and Haley together" he told him honestly. "But man, if the shoe was on the other foot, and it was me who was in prison, wanting to date your..." he looked over at Peyton, who was looking at him, " Beautiful, amazing sister. You would have had a problem with it to."

Nathan thought a second knowing deep down, that he was right, he for sure wouldn't want Peyton dating anyone who was in prison. " I feel ya, on that I do man, "

The room went silent, the four just sitting there, staring at each other, " I need to get this off my chest, " Haley said breaking the silent. " I don't believe that the guy that I have had the pleasure to get to know over the last month, could kill someone, there;s more to the story, there has to be."

He looked over at his sister who was biting her bottom lip, "Nope that's the story," Nathan said, looking down at the floor,

Lucas and Haley eyed him, then looked at Peyton who had seem to be lost in her own thoughts, " So your saying that out of the blue one night, you decided to just kill someone without no reason?"

" yep.."

Lucas was staring at Peyton who seemed to be battling herself with something, " I think you were protected someone..." he said still looking at Peyton. Peyton's eyes shot up, locking with his, " I don't think it was on purpose, I think it was one of those life or death things, you didn't have a choice, so you did what you had to do," Peyton swallowed hard, not believing his words, it was like he was there, like he was reading her mind, like he could see through her eyes into her soul. " Are maybe you didn't do it, someone else did it and you took the fault."

"No I did it , I shot the guy because I felt like it." Nathan said, trying to keep his voice calm,

" I don't believe you." Lucas said, not believing his story... He figured if he continued to push on, someone will slip something out.

" I don't give a fuck if you believe me or not, that's the fucking truth," Nathan yelled,

" So you just decided one day to throw away your life, fuck basketball, let's go kill someone"

"Lucas, "Haley whispered, knowing her brother was trying to get somewhere with the two, but she didn't want them to get so mad that they threw them out. "stop it.."

" No Haley, I deserve to know the truth, I mean, did you not care if the man had a family, did you enjoy it, did it make you feel like a man, when you did it."

Nathan was turning red, "Get out" he yelled, "Both of you get the hell out of our place.."

" Can't handle the truth Nate, you can kill an innocent man, but can't...

"He didn't do it, I did it.." Peyton screamed... " I did it..." she cried, "It wasn't Nathan, it was me, I should have been the one that went to prison...But Nathan took the fall for me, I did...I did..." she cried, throwing her head into her hands, shaking, she had kept that inside forever, never telling a soul, part of her was actually glad it was out...

Haley stood with her mouth open, staring at Peyton. Nathan was beyond shocked that she screamed it out the way she did, Lucas was shocked, but yet not surprise he knew there was more to it, He walked over to her, feeling the need to protected her, he kneel in front of her, taking her hands away from her face, he held her hand, he looked her in the eyes, " everything's going to be alright."