(HQ – Guest room – At morning)
Dean opened his eyes and realized that he fell asleep on the couch – Cas? – said Dean looking at the bed, Castiel wasn't there, he knocked on the bathroom door, but he wasn't there too.
Sammy! – Shouted Dean walking to the living room
Hello, Dean – Said Castiel that stood there with his trench coat on – If you don't mind I got it back from your room.
C-Cas? – Said Dean looking at the angel surprised, he could feel that Castiel was himself again – Of course not, it was yours.
Dean – Said Castiel smiling – My powers are back… but not all of them.
So did you heal yourself? – said Dean coming close and sitting
Yes – Said Castiel turning his back – Thank you – Continued the angel, he wanted to be with Dean, but his time was becoming shorter every second, Castiel smiled and his blue eyes become filled with a mix of sorrow and longing - for everything.
Wait Cas! – Said Dean trying to reach out for him, but this time he vanished – Where are you going?
Dean, you ok? – Asked Sam worried walking into the room
Cas got his powers back – Said Dean sitting on the chair
That's good right? – Asked Sam looking at Dean's upset expression – What happened?
He freaked disappeared on me, Sammy! – Said Dean resting his feet on the coffee table – I'll tell you, dude, something is wrong with him.
I know – Said Sam resting his book on the coffee table close to Dean's feet – But I maybe can answer that…
Did you find anything Sammy? – Asked Dean standing up, he was full of hope again
Yes, and no – Said Sam smiling – But we got a shot, Dean.
(Somewhere – At morning )
Castiel closed his eyes to felt the cold breeze in his face, standing in the top of the highest mountain in there, he smiled.
Is it safe for me being here? – He asked himself, knowing that if his powers were coming back again, they would come in full force and overpower him… "Meaning a big blast of energy, like plutonium, right Dean?" Thought Castiel, he opened his eyes to admire the ice and the millions of colors on the sunrise and the clouds under him like a big white carpet.
It was peaceful up there, at least he was alone again, and it was good to be alone...Nothing in there that would make him think about what would happen very soon.
Cas? Where are you dude? – He could hear Dean praying to him, it was difficult to ignore, but he knew that it was for the best, Castiel would never forgive himself if he died and took Dean and Sam with him – Cas, please… We need to talk.
Castiel closed his eyes and tried to ignore Dean's words "Why do he cares that much?" Thought the angel "And why do I care about him that much?" Castiel stood in silence, thinking about the briefly times he was human; it's tasted sort of bittersweet taste in his mouth.
He could remember Dean's lips, it felt softy like his smile "Father, what is that I feel?" Said Castiel covering his face with his hands, his body growing electrical over the clouds like a thunder, then he quieted his heart, knowing God didn't care, why was he praying again? "Old habits die hard" Thought the angel
The sun went down and the stars greeted him, shinning peaceful and hopeful for something. Castiel looked at then, reflecting upon the road until now.
What I've became? – Said Castiel to himself – Was it worth?
Castiel opened his arms and looked at the sky – I gave you everything I have, isn't that enough, Father? – He just wanted an answer; he knew if he turned to Dean now he wouldn't leave anymore, and eventually would hurt Dean again.
Father?! – Shouted him hoping that somehow God would take pity on him, but his prayers were answered with silence once again – I gave you everything, I've got nothing else to give!
Castiel looked down to the mountain and realized that he had one thing to give; he turned his back and closed his eyes while opening his arms "Please" He whispered and let his body goes down falling into the clouds under him with a smile, it was his leap of faith.
(Hq – Living Room – At night)
Sammy, are you sure that's gonna work? – Asked Dean covering the floor with a big carpet
Not sure Dean, but it's worthy a shot – Said Sam pouring some holy oil on the floor
Can I call him? – Asked Dean sitting on the floor
Yes – Said Sam with strange handcuffs – But let's follow the plan, Dean.
I know I call him, give you a sign – Said Dean standing up and handcuffing one on his hand – Then I handcuff him when he is close.
Yes – Said Sam with a lighter – Are you sure you want to do it Dean?
Yes, I want to Sammy – Said Dean sighting – He died for us a lot of times, I know is dangerous.
Dean… If something happens, thank you – Said Sam handcuffing him on a pipe close to the icebox
Stop that Sammy, everything will be all right – Said Dean smiling boyish like it was just a kid's game for him, Dean closed his eyes and continued – Cas? Where are you dude?
Castiel didn't reply to him, Sam shook his head – Do it again, Dean.
Cas, please… We need to talk – Repeated Dean still eyes closed, nothing happened, Dean opened his eyes and turned to Sam – What do I do Sammy?
Dean, you have to draw his attention – Said Sam smiling
How do I do it? – Said Dean confuse
Tell him what you really feels – Said Sam
Very funny, dude – Said Dean rolling his eyes
Dean, I'm not dumb – Said Sam after a pause –Look, I know that you two kissed.
What are you saying Sammy? – Said Dean turning his face away from Sam and blushing a little
I saw you two on the guest room, actually you kissed him – Said Sam with a know it all face
I can explain that – Said Dean sweating – It was just… hun…
It's ok Dean – Said Sam smiling – Now you must tell him what you feel, he thinks that he will end up in a big explosion Dean… Look, we need to trap him here and try to keep his vessel from exploding.
I know that is the plan – Said Dean nervous – Trap him here and use the Enochian sigils to stabilize him.
Yeah, Dean – Said Sam serious – Call him now, we don't have much time.
Ok, ok dude! – Said Dean closing his eyes again and thinking "what do I say? I've never good with words" – Cas, please… You said you've got nothing anymore… That's a lie, you got me, Cas!... I know that heavens were you home, but you home is with us now… Cas, dude – Dean paused and kneeled – Please… - He whispered – God dammit, I love you…Cas, I love you ok?
A hurricane invaded the room, the furniture was moved like an earthquake and Castiel appeared glowing like the sun, his eyes full with energy, and his face shining.
Dean? – Said he walking towards Dean, his footsteps burning the ground where it touched – I'm sorry… I couldn't help but come…
It's ok, buddy – Said Dean holding Castiel against his chest and handcuffing him, Sammy lit the holy fire and trapped him
What are you doing Dean? – Said Castiel his eyes glowing blue his dark wings emerging and consuming the roof
I'm saving you Cas – Said Dean holding him in a embrace – I won't let you die…
Dean – Said Castiel with a smile while an energy glow circled him and Dean – Why?
Because I… - Dean tried to say, but the words just got struck in his throat, he closed his eyes and it just came smoothly rolling off his tongue – I love you.
Castiel smiled softly – I'm going to kill you Dean, my power will burn you before I explode.
No you won't, Cas – Said Dean still holding him – Those sigils will keep us safe.
It won't help Dean – Said Castiel while his skin began to glow even more a bluish calm energy, Dean could feel his arms burning, but he just held Castiel tighter, Dean didn't want to lose him, he loved Castiel and realized that now – See, I'm killing you right now… I'm sorry, Dean.
Don't you dare to be sorry! – Said Dean face to face with the angel – I made my choice!
Castiel understood what Dean meant, he crossed his arms on Castiel' back and held the sigils against him – Dean – Said Castiel, Dean could feel the sadness in his voice – What you'd rather have… Loved and lost, or never had loved?
Dean realized that those sigils were slowly melting, it didn't look good, Sammy was reading a spell to contain Castiel's explosion, but it was useless so far, Castiel was fading away like a star in supernova… But he kept smiling at Dean's face his hands were on Dean's neck – Dean? – Repeated the angel, waiting for a answer
I don't know Cas – Said Dean looking at Castiel's eyes, he knew that he was done, he would die with Castiel in this explosion, what made him furious and scared
Dean – Said Castiel calm, the wind become violent, he could not hear Sam's spell anymore, a wall of light began to lift around then, Dean knew that there wasn't much time left, He understood now that old woman, she couldn't carry on without the one she loved, she chose inexistence with him over existing without him.
Dean putted his hand on Castiel's neck and smiled, he felt calm looking into Castiel's eyes;
I'd rather have you – He said pressing his lips against Castiel's lips – Cas, I'd rather have you over millions of choices.
Castiel smiled widely, his eyes glowing full of energy and his body began to burn Dean's skin, he fought to keep his consciousness – Dean, that they in the park… I wanted to ask you, something, remember? – He whispered, his nose touching Dean's cheek, Castiel fought to keep his mind from wave from there
Yes, I do Cas… What was it? – Said Dean closing his eyes and ready to embrace his death while holding Castiel, Dean didn't felt afraid for the first time, he felt safer than before even knowing that his death was certain and near
What love feels like, Dean? – Asked Castiel innocently smiling, because this time he knew the answer
Dean smiled and tears came down from his face, melting in the air like fragile clouds in the sky – You know that one Cas.
Castiel closed his eyes and held Dean in silence - Can you do something for me? – Whispered Castiel caressing Dean's hair, his longs and dark wings now were around them like a shield trying to protect Dean
Anything Cas – Said Dean holding Castiel against him, despite it being burning his skin, Dean took the pain without not even shake – Anything for you.
I've reach my full power – Continued the angel smiling – I can bend time and space… But I'm losing myself, Dean.
Cas – whispered Dean worried – What you want me to do?
Can you pray to me again, Dean? – Asked Castiel trying to keep his smile and resting his head on Dean's shoulder
Yes, Cas – Said Dean, his hands held tight on Castiel's trench coat – Pray for what?
Pray that we could start again. – Said Castiel whispering in Dean's ears – I Love you, Dean.
I love you too – Said Dean still with eyes closed, he knew that Castiel true form could make him blind, Dean felt Castiel's lips on his while breathing deeply , he lifted his face high praying that they could start again. For his sake, for Castiel's and Sam's sake, and even for the world he prayed harder, more that he wished to end his pain, more that he wished to live, even if it cost Castiel's love, they needed to start again, and maybe rewritten this bad ending.
Everything become a soundless white wave that burned him whole, but Dean held his wish whispering "That's not how it was supposed to end, Cas" what gave him strength to smile and whisper again "Cas, I'm praying ok?".