A/N: Lil-Miss-Dinozzo: hahaha you are so funny! As always thanks for the review! Nine hours for a freaking kiss hahaha love that.

acheon: The next chapter will start to get more "M" lol and thanks for the reviews!! :]

Kelsey2010: hahaha I thought about making her beat him…but he's really too much to resist when he's leaning you up against a wall in your personal space and speaking that way in that low voice of his …and she's only human hahahahahahaha. :] thanks so much for your reviews!

Alix33: Yes, I was waiting for someone to catch that! Nice job :] About Harm's mom and step-father, for the purpose of this story they are not so involved. I just feel that Harm is an adult and he is at the last minute flying over there for a short time to deal with an issue they are not even aware of. They are not central to this story so I just made the decision to keep them out. Thanks for the question and review :]

Tamk3: Thank you so much! I appreciate hearing things like that and props for reading it all just now :] Hope you continue to enjoy!

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He made his way back to their table, his mind spinning and his heart racing. He wondered why all of a sudden the room felt different.

He checked his watch for the time. Several minutes had passed. He started to panic. What if she had bolted? What if he had gone too far? He wanted to go find her. He checked his watch again, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He waited a few more minutes, and visibly relaxed when he saw her making her way across the room to him.

She sat back down beside him, quietly setting her clutch down on the table.

Their eyes met briefly, and Harm swore he detected a hint of a smile in them.

"Colonel!" Major Erin Miller approached her, a baby in her arms.

"Hi!" Mac's face lit up. "Is this the little guy?"

"Yes," she responded as she lowered the baby's blanket for Mac to see. "This is little Ethan Miller." She couldn't help but gush. "Do you want to hold him?"

"Of course."

Erin lowered the baby into Mac's arms.

Mac held him carefully, staring down at his small features and unable to contain the smile on her face. She lifted her hand softly to caress his little fingers.

Harm watched Mac hold the baby and was unable to stop the ache in his chest.

"Major Erin Miller, this is Commander Harmon Rabb Jr. of the JAG Corps." Mac smiled and nodded with her head in Harm's direction, as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and continued to gush over the little miracle in her arms.

"Nice to meet you, Sir." Erin smiled as she took a seat beside Mac.

"Are you getting much sleep yet?" Mac asked.

"A little, but then he opens his eyes and smiles at me, or grasps my finger in his little hand, and its all worth it."

Mac smiled. "I'll bet."

She rocked the baby a bit in her arms, talking to him softly as she swayed her arms.

And as he caught her eye over the table, the baby cradled in her arms, his heart nearly broke. He wanted this. He wanted this with her. For her. But, he had gone and screwed it up. One night of weakness and she was suffering too.

Although Harm had yet to fully grasp Mac's reasons for leaving or the feelings she may have, when he saw how she lit up with that baby in her arms, the pieces began to fall together.

Several minutes passed. Harm and Mac found themselves alone once more, an uncomfortable silence lingering heavily above their table like a cloud.

Harm stole a glance Mac's way. 'Had it really happened back there? Had he really had his mouth on her…her body flush against him?' He half wondered if he had invented the moment in his mind…but he could still smell her perfume and taste her on his lips.

It took a moment for Harm to realize that Mac had caught him staring. She gave him a look that seemed to say: "Don't stare at me. Not like that."

"Harm." Her breath had caught. "We need to talk."

Harm nodded slowly. "I know." He said in a whisper.

Mac shifted in her chair, re-situating the fabric of her dress.

"I'm afraid, Mac." He started, swallowing hard before continuing. "Afraid that what I have to say to you won't be enough to make you want to be with me."

Mac shook her head sadly, her hands fidgeting with her cloth napkin. "See, that's where you're wrong; I already want to be with you…...but, wanting and getting are two different things, Harm." Her expressive eyes slowly came up to meet his, and she seemed on the verge of crying.

"I'm here, Mac. I came to find you and despite what you may think, I didn't come here to rescue you…didn't come because I thought you may need saving. I was worried about you...and I did care to see how you were..but I know you are strong, Mac. I knew you didn't need to be saved." His voice was ragged with emotion as his eyes pleaded with hers. "I came here to save myself."

Mac closed her eyes and shook her head quickly, as if trying to clear it of his words.

"I need you, Mac."

Mac looked down once again, her voice insecure and tinged with sadness as she finally found it in her to speak.

"...And I need you…but unfortunately, I am not the only woman who does, Harm...and certainly not the one who should be receiving priority."

Harm hated himself in that moment. He reached for her hand, his fingers curling around it on her lap before she jerked it away.

"She's not a factor in this, Mac."

"Like hell she's not."

Mac shot a glance around her, as if just now remembering where they were having this discussion.

"We should go."

Before he could respond, she was standing up. She grabbed her clutch and started toward the door, him following shortly after.

Mac reached into her clutch and took out her ticket, handing it to the valet as Harm came to stand beside her.

"Does she know you are here?" She breathed into the San Diego night air.

"No."

Mac hadn't supposed otherwise.

Her car pulled up and Mac went around to the driver's side as the valet got out and she tipped him.

She got in and shut her door, buckling her seat belt and watching him do the same in silence. She pulled off the curb and into the street, heading back toward her apartment.

Harm stared out the window. He needed to say something now. He could feel it. But, he had yet to find the right words, so he thought it better to sit there silently.

She took his turn.

"Do you think that is fair?"

"What are you talking about?"

"To do to her…to do to me."

"You think I owe it to her to tell her our story?" Harm said, hands gesturing in frustration.

"You owe it to me that she know it, yes."

There was silence.

"I want her to know it…to know about me. God, that makes me screwed up, huh?"

Mac managed through waves of emotion as she put her head in her hands on the steering wheel, having stopped at the light.

She ran a hand through her hair, her other coming to rest over her mouth as she looked over at him.

"Damn it." Mac uttered angrily when a horn sounded behind her, alerting her that the light had turned green.

"I want her to know who I am to you…what we've seen each other through." She whispered sadly as she drove.

"Mac" Harm pleaded gently for her to stop, but she wouldn't hear of it.

"I want her to know that I have one part of you that she can never have...true she may have had you in her bed, she may have your child growing inside her, but goddamn it I had ten years with you so"-- Mac started sarcastically, her words teeming with anger and sadness.

"Please Mac, don't do this."

"It's done, Harm. YOU did this—not me. I didn't ask for this." She said in a rush, her voice tortured and raw.

Mac put the car into park and Harm realized they were back at her apartment.

"I know you didn't, Mac. Damn it…I know you didn't."

She unbuckled her seat belt and turned the car off.

"What if I had gotten drunk with some guy, huh? Let him put his hands on me in a moment of weakness? Took him home and wound up pregnant? What would you do? How would you be feeling?" She raised her voice.

Harm reached over the seat for her.

"Don't touch me!" she smacked at his chest.

"I'm so sorry Mac…I'm so sorry." His voice broke.

"I need you to forgive me, Mac."

"What?" she muttered in disbelief, her head spinning to look at him.

"If you forgive me maybe I can work on forgiving myself…"

Mac's head fell forward a little in defeat. "It's not like you cheated on me, Harm."

"I hurt you."

"I had no claim on you…you had every right to do what you did. You are an adult." Mac said solemnly. Evenly.

Harm unbuckled his seatbelt. "I made a mistake…now we're paying for it. I'd do anything to fix this, Mac."

"Everyone is entitled to mistakes. God knows I haven't led a perfect life, Harm."

"Stop it, Mac. I'd prefer you screaming at me again to this...this detachment. "

"Harm," Mac deflated. "I can't cry any more tears…I can't say any more words. I don't want to talk. I don't want to hash it out with you anymore. Because…Because, at the end of the day she will still be the woman pregnant with your child and I'll still be the woman who is so jealous and shattered she can't see straight."

With that, Mac reached for the handle of the door, opening it and getting out of the car.

Harm did so as well and came around the car to where she was standing beside it.

Without a word or sound, Mac leaned into him, resting her face on his chest as one arm circled her waist and the other found its way to the back of her head where it lay softly.

In the midst of so much that had gone wrong, Harm did something that for the first time in a long while, felt right. He held her.