"Good luck, honey." Joyce leaned forward and hugged Buffy's shoulders before standing. "Call me and let me know how things go." Then she looked at Buffy with an almost wistful expression. "Unless…"
Getting to her feet, Buffy wondered what was wrong. "Unless what, Mom?"
"Well," Joyce turned away and started industriously wiping down the counters. "I just thought it might be nice if you spent the night here and we went out to breakfast. You know…like old times."
Old times? Buffy rolled her eyes. Had more time passed than she realized? "Mom, I've only been in college since August. I don't think 'Old Times' apply." It did sound fun, though. A lot more fun than an empty dorm room or an angry roommate. "It's a date. I'll spill my dark secrets to the gang and come back here."
Joyce didn't turn around when she answered, "Perfect. I'll look forward to it." Her voice was choked and nasally. She sniffed and cleared her throat, dishrag never ceasing its movements. "Go on, honey. You don't want to be late."
"Bye, Mom. See you later." Smiling, Buffy trotted out of the kitchen and then the front door. It was a clear night, and stars littered the sky. Despite the dread balled up in her stomach, Buffy whistled as she jogged through Sunnydale. Her mom was right. Willow and Xander would be OK. Faith? Well, Faith would be whatever Willow was.
As Buffy passed Restfield, she hesitated at the front gates. She hadn't patrolled yet. Worse, she hadn't made arrangements with Faith to cover for her. Damn. She was already late for the Bronze, and she was the one who'd moved up their meeting time.
Patrol after the Scooby meeting, Buffy promised herself. If things didn't go the way her mom thought, vampire bashing would be good therapy.
Picking up the pace, Buffy resumed her trek to the Bronze. Thanks to the new time slot, the dimly lit bar and dance club was quiet. Buffy paused at the top of the stairs and peered around. She didn't see Willow and Faith. Good. She could get a table and decide how to tell them about Tara. Making her way down the stairs, Buffy ordered drinks for the gang and took up residence at their favorite table.
"Come on, Tara. Please go to the Bronze with us." Willow tried the same look she'd used earlier.
This time, though, Tara had confirmation that Buffy was her roommate and the memories from high school to help her. "No." Although the refusal was soft, it was firm. She wasn't going to the bar. "The lib-library. Please."
Wilting, Willow nodded. "OK. Maybe next time."
Didn't she ever give up? Lips twitching slightly, Tara agreed, "Maybe next time." Looping her bag over her shoulder, she started across the quadrangle. Faith and Willow scrambled in her wake.
They walked in silence for a while. Then Faith cleared her throat, and Tara saw her glancing her way. "Uh…T?" Faith grunted slightly at the elbow Willow dug into her side. "I mean, Tara?"
"Yes?" Tara couldn't stop the smile. Watching Willow and Faith was better than a TV sitcom.
"You didn't answer Red earlier. If you got all that mojo, why didn't you dust that vamp?" Faith asked.
Her smile faded. Tara stared at her boots as she walked. "I…I c-couldn't re-remember the spell," she admitted. "By the ti-time, I did, you were th-there."
"That's so cool!" Willow enthused.
Tara's head came up in shock.
Bouncing along next to Faith, Willow grinned. "Not the forgetting part. That's bad. I mean, Faith was there, so no badness happened. I meant the spell part. I don't even know any spells to forget. What kind of spell were you going to try?"
There was a lag when Willow finished as Tara blinked trying to figure out what Willow had asked amid the flood of words.
"Red wants to know how you were going to kill the vamp," Faith translated helpfully.
"Oh." Tara didn't remember anything like that from Willow's comments. "I was g-going to try a sun-sunlight spell." She saw Willow's mouth open and hurried on to avoid another confusing speech. "My mother t-taught it to me a lo-long time ago." So long ago, Tara wasn't sure she could have gotten it to work.
She flinched when Faith's hand landed on her shoulder.
"Whoa! Easy, T." Faith pulled back, both hands raised in silent apology. "Didn't mean to scare you." She stepped away, giving Tara some space.
Tara could feel Faith's intent look, though, like a physical touch. The blush faded from her cheeks, and she knew all the color had fled. Biting her lip, she glanced up.
Faith's brown eyes caught hers. She didn't say anything, though. She merely looked, and Tara read the promise in that steady gaze. For now, Faith would let her overreaction go. Soon, though…Faith would be back with questions.
The library was up ahead. Tara picked up the pace, needing to get inside and away from Faith and Willow. Nearly sagging with relief, she set her foot on steps leading to the front doors.
"Not so fast, T." Tara froze at Faith's husky command.
Her foot slipped off the step as she turned. "Wh-what?" Tara stuttered, peering up at the other girl through her bangs. She wiped her sweating palms on her skirt.
Arms crossed over her chest, Faith answered, "When you head back to the dorms, you give us a call."
As if they'd choreographed the maneuver, Willow dug a piece of paper out of her backpack and held it out to Tara.
Reluctantly, Tara took it and peered at the number scrawled across it. "Th-this isn't the number you le-left earlier."
"Nah. Don't know why Red even gave you that one. Ain't like we're ever at home." Faith's dimples teased a smile from Tara. "Always got the cell phone with me, though." The grin (and the dimples) disappeared. "No more picking up fangy dates, T. Me and Red…hell, even B, if she ain't out with her newest boy toy, can get you where you need to be."
Stuffing the paper into her pocket, Tara edged up the first step. "OK." She hoped the answer sounded convincing, even though she had no intention of using the escort service. "Thanks for the help tonight." Running up the stairs, Tara fled for the peace and quiet of the library.
The Bronze started filling up as Buffy sipped her second soft drink. Where was Willow? Buffy didn't spare a thought for Faith. She was always late; not Willow. If anything, she was always annoyingly on time.
Her senses tingled.
Buffy began scanning the bar automatically then slumped back into her previous pose when the feeling finally registered. The missing couple had arrived. That just left Anya and Xander. Smiling wryly, Buffy wondered if they would even make it for the meeting or if they were staying home and in bed.
"Yo, B." Faith dropped onto the couch and bumped Buffy's shoulder. "You look like you been here a while. Mrs. S didn't toss you out again, did she?"
Rolling her eyes, Buffy nodded. "Yes, Faith. She did. Mom kicked me out of the house, which I don't live in anymore. I don't know where I'll go now. It's not like I have a dorm room to go to or anything." She had a dorm room. Could she actually go there if Tara was back?
Snorting, Faith took a swig from her root beer bottle. "Bitch."
It might have degenerated into their usual exchange of insults if Willow hadn't interrupted. "What did you do to Tara?" she demanded bluntly. "We saw her on the way here. She freaked when we mentioned joining us." Steely green eyes bore into Buffy. "You knew she would. You told me she wouldn't come because you would be here."
Buffy squirmed under that look. She tried to delay answering by peering around the Bronze. "Have either of you seen Xander or Anya?" she mumbled.
"Buffy…" Willow's voice warned her there would be consequences if she stalled anymore.
She had to try one last time. "Wiiiill," Buffy whined. "It's bad. I don't want to tell it more than once. Can't we wait? I mean, they're only…" she checked her watch and groaned, "forty minutes late. They might still make it."
"B, we all know the Demon ain't letting X-man out of bed for this." Faith turned on the couch so she faced Buffy. "What the fuck did you do? You're sweatin' like a whore in Church."
"'k…not real sure what that means, Faith." Buffy gave up and set her glass on the table. "If it's got something to do with wanting to throw up at just the thought of the way you used to be, then yep, that's me." Tracing a pattern in the condensation on the glass, she continued. "You remember me talking about the way I was before I was Called. The whole Cordy Clone thing."
Two nods answered her.
Buffy didn't know how to make this sound anything other than terrible. "Tara played Willow to my Cordy."
"You made fun of her clothes?" Buffy might have laughed at Willow's question if the situation hadn't been so serious.
She shook her head. "Worse." Risking a glance up, Buffy met her best friend's wary look.
"How worse?" Those green eyes never wavered.
The urge to hide was back. Ignoring the lure of the dark space under the table, Buffy spilled her secret. Recounting the same story she'd told Joyce, she kept her eyes locked on Willow's.
As she talked, the bright green darkened with pain and blurred with tears.
Buffy forced the words out. "I…I think that's why I knew I couldn't be part of the Cordette's, Will. I saw the way she treated you that first day. It was me, and I hated it. I hated the way she hurt you."
"Was I some kind of project, Buffy?" Willow asked. She sniffed and scrubbed a hand over her face. "Some way to make yourself feel better?"
All the sugary soda had been a bad idea. Swallowing to keep it inside and not all over the table, Buffy nodded jerkily. "At first, maybe."
Willow jumped up, Faith on her feet only seconds later.
"Don't." Panicking, Buffy stood and held out an imploring hand. "Will, please. Just…let me explain. It was just at first. Then I got to know you, and now you're my best friend." She tried to grin; it felt wrong. Twisted. "I'm not that person anymore."
"Maybe not." Willow's words weren't reassuring. She backed away from the table, clutching Faith's hand.
Buffy started to follow then stopped when a slim hand snapped up.
Face pale, Willow took another step. "I…I need some time, Buffy. You should have told me. How could you not have told me what you did?"
Before Buffy could marshal a defense, Faith and Willow had disappeared into the dancing crowd.