Karkat punched the wall, crying out in frustration.
Why did he always do this? Ruin any chance of the Romantic Quadrants with the person he cared most about, just because he was too proud to tell her his feelings.
He was almost positive the only Quadrant he could ever make with her at this point was a Kismesis, regardless of his red feelings, or the fact that he didn't even hate her at all, but he supposed that's just how things worked out for him.
He decided he might as well just give up. He didn't want to play the stupid game anymore; he caused enough damage as it was… and worst of all, he just made everyone around him feel terrible. Well everyone except Gamzee. But Gamzee was nowhere to be found, even though Karkat really needed his Morial.
He sighed as he sank to the floor, staring up at the stars; he never wanted to be seen again. He had humiliated himself for the millionth time, and he was getting tired of it. All he wanted was to relax, just stop worrying about Gamzee breaking again, Dave becoming matesprites with Terezi, or who Kanaya was going to feed on and when.
Slowly he closed his eyes, he wondered what it would be like to be blind and have to smell everything in order to see. He was almost certain it would suck the human bone bulge, but maybe if he could get Terezi to help him, they could go back to being just Morials…
Of course after thinking it through he rejected the idea as too dumb and stupid to ever work, besides the fact that he liked being able to watch the stars as they passed.
He couldn't believe he had been so rude to her… he never wanted to make her cry… he just didn't want to think about her being with Dave instead of him.
He needed to see her… to apologize… he didn't even care if she apologized for telling him he had no friends, he was completely fine with that, he just needed her to know that he was sorry and that he wouldn't let anything happen to her, even if it she wouldn't do the same for him.
He got up, going to the transportalizer, and began his search, before getting lost on one of the unexplored floors.
"TEREZI!" He called, rounding another corner. He thought he heard something, but he wasn't sure, "HELLO? IS ANYONE HERE?"
"hey best motherfucking friend…" He heard Gamzee say from behind him.
He wheeled around, accidentally stumbling before tripping over his own feet and landing in something sticky. He looked around in horror before he realized it was just some spilled orange Faygo, and he let out a sigh of relief.
"Are you ok, my brother?" Gamzee asked, helping him up, "You seem a little on edge…"
"Yeah I'm just fucking terrific! I just spent the last half hour loathing myself, so the day is just going terrific! Oh! Besides the fact that I made Terezi cry because I like being dumb and stupid and rude, so that just put the icing on the damn human baked desert I'd say!" He said in frustration, "You know what Gamzee?! JUST KILL ME! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO LOOK AT WHAT A STUPID EXCREMENT PILE I AM!" He growled, grabbing the front of the clown's shirt and shaking him, "JUST FUCKING DO IT! IT'S NOT LIKE I'LL TELL ANYONE!"
Suddenly Gamzee patted him on the head.
Karkat stared at him like he was nuts, "What the fuck Gamzee?" He asked dumbfounded, "Just what the fuck was that?"
He patted him again.
"DAMMIT GAMZEE STOP!" He yelled before he patted the clown on the head, "THERE HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LIKE IT?!"
Gamzee chuckled before he did it again.
"GODDAMMIT YOU HOMMICIDAL MANIAC I SAID STOP!" He yelled before tackling Gamzee in the rage of a newly initiated Morial patting battle.
Finally Gamzee got him to calm back down, and he just sat against the wall pouting.
"There my motherfuckin brother… are you done talking crazy?" He teased, "After all I thought I was the 'crazy' one…"
Karkat sighed, "Fine… You don't have to kill me… But I still don't have to be happy about it…"
"Come on my brother, what's wrong?" He asked.
"Well…" Karkat sighed, "Terezi has been spending a lot of time with Dave… and… and I was kinda unhappy about it…" he muttered crossing his arms.
"That's all?" he asked, raising his eyebrows, "That's not what Terezi said…" He said grinning mischievously.
Karkat froze, suddenly remembering why he had come down here in the first place.
"Gamzee! Where is she! I have to tell her something!" He said, grabbing his shoulders and looking at him urgently, "I mean… I may have blown it, but I still have to tell her…"
"Tell her what, my best motherfuckin friend?" He asked.
"UGH!" Karkat said annoyed, "FINE GAMZEE! I'll tell you! I need to tell her that I'm flushed for her! Or that I'll gladly just be her friend… I just need her to know that… that I'm sorry…" He said quietly, "I was being a huge shitsponge because I was angry about Dave… I really didn't want her to go…"
Gamzee patted him on the back, "It's ok, my brother… I'll get you back to the Transportalizer, I'm sure she's somewhere up by the lab…"
"Alright, fine…" He muttered, "But if you tell anyone what I said, I'll tell Kanaya where you're hiding…"
Gamzee chuckled, "Well good thing I have no one to tell then…"
They walked back to the Transportalizer, and Gamzee left again, not wanting to accidentally run into Kanaya, and Karkat went back to one of the main floors.
He thought he heard Terezi laugh from somewhere down the hall and he slowly walked toward the sound.
He looked around the corner into the room and saw Terezi and Dave playing with her stupid scalemates.
As he watched, Terezi stopped for a second, looking toward Dave.
"You know…" She mused, "I still don't really know what you look like…"
"Oh…" Dave said, "Well… Do you want me to draw a picture for you?"
Terezi laughed, "No Dave! I see by smelling and tasting so… um… would it be ok if I licked you?"
He saw a slightly confused expression on Dave's face, and he said something Karkat couldn't hear, but he saw Terezi smile before she licked him.
"Karkat, Are You Alright?" Kanaya asked, making him jump back from the doorway.
"Ha… Ha…" He laughed nervously, "Why… Why wouldn't I be ok, Kanaya?! I'm so fucking ok, I'm swimming in the bland ocean of okayness ruling over the fucking sea people of boring-ville!" He said, laughing again.
"Are You Sure? You Seem A Little… Tense…"
"I'M FUCKING FINE KANAYA SO STOP FUCKING ASKING!" He roared, leaving her in shock as he stormed toward the Transportalizer and away from the room, Disappearing just as Terezi went to see what was wrong.