A/N: Ew, I almost uploaded my resume on accident. Good thing for proofreading! I just got my 100th reviewer! YAY! I can't believe I have 100 reviews! Thanks so much everyone for sticking with me and reading and liking it ^_^!

BTW, I know that a full-sized roller coaster at a school carnival is pushing it; I know it. But...this is the DARKLANDS, home of enormous Dragon-Koopas and the royal family heavily subsidizes the Darklandian Academy so...they have a roller coaster on the fairgrounds, okay? I try to keep it realistic but I was playing Mario Party 4 a few days ago and I saw the opening with the crazy unrealistic floating metal present cube from nowhere and people bursting out of it and went "Okay, the Darklands has a dang coaster if I say it has a coaster." Forgive me for taking any future absurd "creative liberties". Enjoy the chapter!

"But Bowser, the game was obviously rigged!" Peach's protests made Bowser smirk as he wheeled her away from the booth. A few seconds ago, she had been arguing with a Snifit when her perfectly aimed softball bounced off the stack of milk bottles. "They must have glued them together or something."

"This is a school carnival. You think they rig the games at a school carnival? Maybe you just didn't throw the ball hard enough," he teased as Peach turned to give him an annoyed look. She knew that he saw the game was unfair. "Look at those little arms you've got there; they're adorable, but they're just not gonna get the job done. That's why I always say you never send a princess to do an awesome Koopa king's work!"

Peach opened her mouth incredulously. "You? You must be joking with me! You not only completely missed the stack of bottles, but you almost took out that elderly Koopa!"

"At least I would have taken something down; not like you," he replied smugly.

"You're awful!"

"I know; it's great isn't it?" Bowser continued down the midway smiling to himself. Suddenly, he stopped and looked upwards at an enormous twisted track on which a beastly roller coaster roared and sped past. "So how do you feel about roller coasters?"

Peach looked at the gargantuan coaster and bit her lower lip. She really was not fond of falling great distances. "Well…I don't know…"

"You're scared?" he asked, a tone of mirth in his voice.

"No, I've just got this inner ear thing and— " Bowser rolled his eyes and picked her up out of her wheelchair mid-sentence and began carrying her towards the entrance gate of the coaster. "Hey, no no, put me down. I'll…get sick!"

"You'll be fine."

Peach began to panic and flail. "No, please…I get really discombobulated," she lied. "And I just ate. I might get sick all over you! Please don't…"

Bowser stopped walking and stared down into Peach's cute blue eyes, she was squirming in his grip. "I'll stop if you stop lying and just admit you're scared to go on the roller coaster."

"Alright, alright, I admit it. I'm scared to go on it, now please put me down."

Bowser smirked triumphantly and kept walking through the gate and turnstiles.

"Hey, what are you doing, you said you'd stop! Put me down!"

"I did stop…and now I'm going again. You need to face your fears, Princess!"

Bowser carefully placed the wriggling princess in a seat of the coaster, and quickly fastened the restraints while Peach looked at him with wide and pleading eyes.

"Why are you doing this?" she whimpered. "I'm scared…"

Bowser looked at her sympathetically. He almost felt bad enough to take her off the ride. He reached for her hand with an outstretched claw and grasped it tightly. "Just hold on, it'll be fun. It's perfectly safe; I wouldn't take you anywhere that was dangerous."

Peach looked over at the Koopa King pathetically. Was he not the same king who, in the past, suspended her over molten lava with only a rope around her waist to keep her from a fiery doom?

"Look, if anything goes wrong, you can kick me as hard as you can…twice.

Peach grasped Bowser's hand tighter as the coaster started to move upward

Mario stared upwards, nostrils flared at the giant ape that held his treasured Pauline.

"I-I say, look at that! Th-that appears to be a rather large ape! He looks rather angry, wouldn't you say, old boy?"

Mario dodged a tree branch that the Kongs had thrown in his direction. Raw instinct collided with his intellect as he looked around, frantically searching for a way to reach the jungle canopy before the apes retreated further into the jungle.

"Mario!" Pauline shouted, "Use the vines to climb up. The canopy is pretty solid, you should be okay!" Pauline was amazed at how collected she felt, considering her position: draped over the shoulder of an odorous, hairy ape that was entrenched in battle with her lover.

Diddy looked at the shouting girl with an air of betrayed annoyance before removing her remaining heel and chucking it at the plumber below.

"Hey! Stop that, those are my shoes! I like those."

Donkey Kong roared with rage when he saw Mario begin to climb the vines leading up the canopy. Without thinking, he hurled a rectangular wooden brick, which hit Mario squarely on the head.

"I say! An artifact!" Kolorado rushed out from behind the bush in which he had been previously cowering. He grasped the wooden block and retreated to his bush, where he fondled the device, admiring its wood grain and strange markings.

Mario rubbed his aching head where the "artifact" had hit him. Angered, he ripped his own shoe from his foot, whirling it upwards. It hit Donkey Kong in the face, dangerously close to Pauline's posterior.

"Mario! What are you trying to do? Be careful, that almost hit me!"

Enraged, the great ape began ripping up the canopy, tearing off all of the vines and hurling branches downwards. Diddy chattered excitedly, mimicking DK by throwing leaves and cosmetics from Pauline's purse. Mario jumped, deftly avoiding the barrage of foliage.

Finally, both the ape and the plumber were exhausted. Sweat dripped from Mario's brow and slightly clouded his vision. Donkey Kong panted while Diddy fanned him. The elder Kong gently stroked Pauline's legs, exposed under her ripped dress.

"Get off of me!" she screamed, kicking furiously. She wondered about the logistics of cross-species sexual harassment and decided she did not want to have to find out how it would hold up in a court of law. "Mario, please help me. I don't know what this ape is doing, but I'm getting really uncomfortable."

As the sweaty, tired plumber searched wearily for a place to climb the trees, Kolorado's bush emitted a long, shrill beep like that of a telephone. "Oh, most curious!" shouted Kolorado.

Donkey Kong's eyes widened in fear. Suddenly, the five heard booming noises from deeper in the jungle. Candy Kong, in all her well-endowed glory, burst onto the scene. She glared at Donkey Kong, who still had a hand placed inappropriately upon one of Pauline's legs. The two apes bickered in their native language as Diddy hid and Pauline wiggled from Donkey Kong's grasp. She slid down a sloped tree trunk to join Mario as the apes' argument culminated with Candy becoming physically aggressive towards the unfaithful male, who began to run into the deep jungle, ostensibly begging for forgiveness.

Pauline recovered her shoes and cosmetics after giving Mario a hug and a kiss. Diddy scampered down and climbed on Pauline's back, eliciting a gasp from the latter. Mario jumped into battle stance, ready to defend Pauline against the latest threat. Diddy merely chattered and pointed to Kolorado, who was still fiddling with Donkey Kong's communication device.

Pauline looked softly upon the monkey. "Hm? You want that? Don't worry Mario; this little guy is actually pretty friendly. I mean, even the big one isn't horrible. Before you came by, we were playing some games and eating fruit, it was extraordinary. Of course, I'm very glad you came, this humidity is a killer!"

Diddy chattered again; this time, he was much more insistent.

"N-No, I shan't give this up, you furry little demon. This is a precious artifact, very useful for my archeological research. I'm quite sorry." Kolorado placed the object close to his chest and turned his shell to the Kong in a defensive posture.

Diddy narrowed his eyes, growing visibly angry. Pauline reacted quickly to diffuse the situation. "Well now, I don't think we have a right to take what isn't ours but…perhaps a trade can be arranged?" She held out a handful of mah-jongg tiles with intricate shapes and symbols. "I--I found these by the banks of a river when those apes were taking me into the jungle. Do they look like anything of value?" she asked, hoping Diddy would not feel offended that she was possibly ruining his handmade mah-jongg set by giving away the pieces.

"Oh, would you look at these? Yes, these are clearly ancient wishing stones from the Macalenian clan of Shy Guy. Quite rare, my good woman. Well, I suppose if this small furry beast insists on taking back the other artifact, I shall have to oblige. Yes yes, excellent, now hand over those artifacts, carefully now."

Pauline rolled her eyes and turned to Diddy with the communicator in her hand. "Alright now, I'm going to give this to you but, do you think you could do me a favor?"

Diddy turned his head quizzically.

"I want you to show us the safest way home, can you do that?"

Diddy chattered happily and grabbed the communicator from her grasp. He pressed a few buttons and shrieked into the device. Afterward, he ran into the jungle towards Funky Kong's barrel plane service. The three adventurers followed happily, excited to escape the oppressive heat and humidity of the jungle.

"Oh my Stars, that was a lot of fun!" Peach was giddy with excitement; her cheeks flushed pink after she exited the ride for the sixth time that day.

"Hey, quit walking on that ankle!" Bowser demanded weakly, feeling a little green from all of the coaster's constant twisting motions.

"Highnesses, would you care to see your ride photos?"

"Oh no," Peach groaned, covering her eyes. "I don't want to know what I look like in those."

"Well then, let's get out of here," Bowser suggested, before Peach decided she wanted to go on the ride again.

For the rest of the day, the two royals laughed and played while enjoying their day. However, as the golden sun sank below the horizon, apprehension crept over the Koopa King as the darkness crept across the sky. He knew that, too soon, the time would come when he would have to let Peach return to her castle, returning her to a place within the plumber's reach.

"Peach, let's go on the Ferris wheel!" Bowser suggested, quickly wheeling her towards the enormous lighted contraption.

The seat rocked as Bowser took his seat next to Peach. The princess clasped her hands together as the wheel slowly rose, accommodating new couples. A warm wind tousled their hair as they neared the top of the wheel and stopped again to let another couple on the wheel. From here, Peach could see Toadette and Junior boarding the Ferris wheel. She looked down at her gloved hands and thought again about the intentions of her retainer.

Bowser cleared his throat to get Peach's attention. She was missing the view! Peach turned her head in his direction, and he raised his eyebrows, silently asking her to comment on the vista. At the top of the wheel, she could see a great expanse of dark land, speckled with trees and patches of lights. However, the most entrancing things about the landscape were the pools of molten lava emitting a calm red glow over the terrain.

"Is it dangerous to have open pits of lava throughout your land?" Peach asked the first question that came to her mind.

Taken aback by her unexpected reaction to the beautiful view, Bowser frowned and said, "Not really. It's not much more dangerous than having a polluted lake or something. We keep them clearly marked and sealed, and if you've grown up in the Darklands all your life, you pretty much know what they are and how to stay safe."

Bowser wrung his hands nervously. He did not want to be talking about lava safety on this romantic ride. He felt this could well be his last attempt to reach out to her before the foul mustached plumber tried to sweep her away. He ran his claw through his mane; once again, it was now or never.

"Peach. I have to—are you in love with Mario?" It pained him to say the stupid name.

Peach quickly spun in her seat to meet Bowser's gaze. She raised both eyebrows and slid her mouth over to one side in surprise.

"I know it's none of my business but…I need to know."

She frowned lightly. "Why?"

"Because…I need to know if your taste in men is as bad as your cousin's," he lied, creating a flimsy cover for himself.

Peach rolled her eyes and put a hand to her chin in thought. She thought of her dates with Mario, New Year's, the fortuneteller, and her excitement. Then, she thought of how scarcely she saw the hero, her wishes, and her disappointments.

She opened her mouth to answer and Bowser braced himself for the worst. Obviously, if Mario was thinking about asking her to marry him, the two must be very close. "You're right; it really isn't your business," she sighed and continued, "But, I suppose I can't very well say that I am…"

Bowser looked surprised and elated. She doesn't love him! She doesn't love him! He took her hand in hers abruptly and looked into her eyes with an urgent seriousness. "Alright, then you have to promise me something."

Peach was shocked to find her hand once again so suddenly enclosed by Bowser's warm reptilian claw. She bit her lip as she fought back a strange flighty feeling. Why was he acting so strangely all of a sudden?

"In the Darklands, we never settle for less. My dad didn't settle, I won't settle, and you shouldn't ever EVER settle for anything less than perfect, ever. Don't compromise, don't sympathize, nothing. You only live once and then your game is over."

Peach returned his gaze with a bewildered stare of confusion. What is he talking about!? First he's on about Mario, then he's asking me not to make compromises. What am I supposed to say to that?

"Bowser, I'm a politician. Compromise is a major part of my job…you know that."

"No!" he yelled, just a bit too loudly, causing a few of the other passengers to turn in their seats and look at the Koopa King. "Not like that, I mean about stuff that matters. Not kingdom stuff, but your life and feelings. Promise me you'll never settle for 'good enough'. I know it sounds crazy, but just do it."

"O-okay, I promise."

"Good," he said smugly, taking a deep breath and relishing the feeling of her hand within his. Lost in thought and strange feelings about the king sitting next to her, Peach did not pull her had away and instead looked over the gorgeous scenery, feeling at once an exhilarated nervousness and a warm contentedness.

After the ride ended, Peach reunited with Toadette, who had rekindled her own anxious feelings by the end of the evening. On the Ferris wheel, she could not help telling Junior about all of her fears of what might happen to her because she had dared to bring the princess to his father. Junior felt bad for his new best friend and wanted to help her more than he had ever wanted anything in his whole life. Now, he could see Toadette's sad expression as Peach prepared to question her about her loyalties and motives. Junior swallowed big and decided that being a hero and saving people was not just for pretend. Toadette was a beautiful girl and, more importantly, she was in trouble!

"Mama Peach," he said in his best sad voice. "I'm really sorry…do you forgive me?"

"Sorry? For what are you sorry, Junior?"

"I made your Mushroom girl bring you here today. I told her I would do bad things if she didn't do what I said. I just wanted you to come and be with me, I'm sorry."

Toadette's eyes widened and her mouth opened but she kept quiet. Since his father knew the truth, Junior was in no danger of receiving any punishment; however, she thought that the Koopa prince was very compassionate to come to her aid.

"You forced Toadette? How could you have possibly done such a thing? I thought you were supposed to be in school!"

Bowser looked at his son with amused admiration. It was not every day he saw one of his kids stick his or her neck out for somebody else. Unfortunately, Junior's lie was not a believable one, and it was clear his son has not thought of a feasible way to answer Peach's question. Rather than leave his son grasping for explanations, he decided to step into the act.

"That's not what's important here! Son, how dare you threaten one of Mama Peach's retainers? Do you know what that is? It's an act of terrorism, you irresponsible, ignorant little fool! I spend hours in meetings and negotiations with the Mushroom Kingdom so that we can have a peaceful relationship with them! Now what do I find out? I find out that my own stupid brat is ruining all my hard work with his petty, selfish acts of terrorism! I have half a mind to lock you in the dungeon for the rest of summer! No video games; no dessert!"

Bowser's act of roaring and yelling was so convincing, even Junior began to think he might really be in trouble and started to cry, even though he wanted to seem tough in front of Toadette. Still, he would not expose Toadette in front of his Mama Peach. He'd rather be locked in the dungeons all summer than make her lose her happy smile. Toadette looked at the Koopa King pleadingly, she knew that he knew the truth; was he really so cruel to unjustly punish his own son?

"Bowser," Peach started softly. "I don't think anyone in my kingdom views Junior's actions as terrorism. He's only a child and children make foolish decisions. He apologized and admitted he was wrong."

"Peach, he's gotta learn that big boy threats have big boy consequences." Bowser heaved a dramatic sigh, "But I guess if nobody else in your kingdom finds out about this and you don't think it's terrorism, then there's no harm done. Still, I'm not happy to hear about this and I think Junior owes the Mushroom girl a proper apology. You could have gotten her in a lot of trouble you little whelp. Now give her an apology, the Darklandian Princely way."

Junior had to stop himself from smiling as he scrunched up his face and said, "Do I gotta?"

"Now!" Bowser returned in a low, menacing growl.

Junior sighed and bowed deeply in front of the pink Toad. "I'm sorry for being a big jerk, I hope you'll forgive me," he said in his most reticent voice before giving Toadette a quick peck on the cheek.

Toadette's eyes widened further than she thought possible. She muttered "I accept your apology" to the ground as a crimson hue invaded her face.

The Darklandian royals accompanied the two ladies to the train station and stood on the platform as they watched the train pull away.

Bowser smirked at his youngest. "A Mushroom girl, eh? You're a chip off the old block."

Realizing that he was not in trouble and that his father had just saved his neck and set him up with an excuse to kiss Toadette, Junior returned Bowser's smirk with a wide grin. "That's 'cause you're the best, King Dad."