Disclaimer- I don't own these characters. :)
Chapter 8
He stumbled. Edward, the most graceful man I had ever met, stumbled when he saw me. It was as he caught himself that it hit me just how much I had really affected him.
"Is it—is it really you?" I had always thought it was cheesy when I heard that line in movies and on TV, but after imagining Edward everywhere for a year of my life, and then almost every night in my dreams for another two, they seemed more then appropriate. "Yes, its really me…We have to talk." He nodded slowly and walked over to a chair next to the couch I was sitting on, keeping his distance. "Are you alright?" He asked, concern covering his beautiful face. "Yes, I just need to tell you a lot of things, and I think it would be best if you could promise not to move until I'm done." I said move instead of speak, because I knew it was not beneath him to punch a window in, and he wouldn't hesitate to move to hold me either, and until I decided my feelings, I did not want any physical contact. I took a deep breath, and closed my eyes, so I couldn't watch emotions flicker across his face. "Edward, the day you left, I was getting ready to tell you that I was pregnant. I never, ever cheated on you, and you are not stupid, so you should know that. I don't know how I managed to conceive, but the point is, I was pregnant, and you needed to know." I lost myself in the story of the last three years, realizing that it was in fact, three years to the day since I had seen him in person. I told him about how I saw right through his lie, and did not want to get in the way of whatever he was so sure about. It took all of the strength I have and more to keep my voice and breathing even while I spoke of my pregnancy, realizing he was not coming back, and finally, our daughter and son. I explained their names, and what happened the day they were born. I told him about my struggle to put the past behind me, and how Ean was my pride and joy. I even told him about Luke. Edward had once said that he wanted me to go out and get married to someone human, someone to grow old with, and I knew that he would hate Luke for loving me, but he would never hate me for loving Luke. He may have left, but I trusted him so much, even now, that by the end of my story Edward knew almost everything that had happened to me, with a few details missing. I took one more deep breath, and opened my eyes to look at Edward.
He had gotten up and moved to the other side of the room at some point while I was talking, and was now sitting on a chair in the corner farthest from me. On his face was a look I can only describe as one of a brutal and very real kind of emotional torture. He was not looking at me, rather staring at the ground, and I could hear his breathing, it was quick and almost labored. Sort of like the way I had been breathing for months after he left me, and every time I had been faced with a cruel dose of reality afterwards. Looking at him, I couldn't find the words to describe how very real his presence had become. This was not a dream, because in my old dreams, Edward was perfect and god-like, smiling crookedly with a look of love I sometimes couldn't understand in his eyes. Comparing that Greek god to this Edward, I realized I wasn't the only one who suffered. He left for my safety, and it cracked me, but I never really gave up, but this man in front of me… the only word I could think of to describe him was broken.
When I thought that word, it all hit me at once. The uncharacteristic sadness looming in Alice's eyes, the way her story weaved perfectly with Edward, my thoughts about how the Cullen's felt about leaving. They had damaged me, but what they got in return was much worse. Their family was in pieces, the best family I ever knew, and it was all because of my leaving—I had broken up the Cullens, but most importantly, my presence had broken my Edward—no it had shattered my Edward, maybe beyond what even I could repair.
A/N my ride for basketball is going to be here in about 2 minutes, so long a/n and thank yous next chapter. Happy Friday! review and make me happy=)