A/N: I do not own Twilight

Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter… for some reason it wouldn't let me reply to them but thanks anyways. Someone asked me how long this story is going to be and it probably won't be too long. I've planned about 22 chapters all together. That could vary but not by a lot.

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Chapter 9

Bella

The weeks following my talk with Alice were chaotic to say the least. I learnt that juggling two guys isn't as easy as it seems. Not that I ever thought this would be easy. I'd only seen Edward twice since the first date at his house. Once out at the park and again at his house for dinner. I felt bad not being able to invite him over to mine but I knew that just wasn't an option. After each date we'd kissed politely… ish… and gone our separate ways. I couldn't bring myself to sleep with him. I didn't know if it was because I wasn't ready or because I felt guilty over Mike.

Ah the guilt. It was still there like a rash that wouldn't go away. I tried to ignore it but before and after every date with Edward it was there as if ready to consume me. I'd feel more guilty after the date because I'd realise I hadn't thought about Mike once throughout it. When I was with Edward we were in our own little bubble where everything was just perfect and I didn't need to worry about anything. I'd just hate the moment when I'd realise that bubble had popped.

It was a Wednesday and I was sitting at my desk eating my lunch. Yes I know! I was working through lunch. But day dreaming over Edward seemed to mean I took a lot longer to do things as I kept getting distracted. He would always be in my thoughts with his glistening green eyes, his sexy bronze hair and his naked body. Yes I always seemed to picture Edward naked, even though I'd never actually seen him… you know… naked. I'm sure the reality would be much better than the fantasy.

"Oh. My. God. Who is that?" I looked over to my workmate Lauren at the desk next to me who seemed to be drooling over some guy who'd just walked in. I rolled my eyes and continued working. If I didn't get this article done today I'd be in some serious shit.

"Ah he's looking over."

"Um-hmm." I continued to work uninterested. I'd almost had enough of guys after going out with two of them.

"Bella? I know you're married but don't be a kill-joy, just look at him. He's smoking."

I groaned internally and looked up reluctantly at the guy at the door who was now walking over to us.

SHIT.

It was Edward.

Edward was here.

Edward, who I was having an affair with, was at my work.

In front of my colleagues.

Who knew I was married.

Shit, shit, shit.

"I know. I told you he was hot," pestered Lauren who must have mistaken my expression of shock for lust.

I jumped out of my seat and strode over to Edward who I noticed had some flowers in his hand.

You've got to be kidding me.

"Edward," I said quietly through gritted teeth.

"Hello Bella," he smiled his dashing smile and leaned in to kiss me on the cheek. My body reluctantly leaned forward before I told myself to back away.

"Let's go outside," I said tugging him by his arm into the hallway.

"What was that about?" he asked suspiciously once we were alone.

"Oh um,"… think on your feet Bella … "my boss is really stingy about visitors, especially when I'm so behind on my work."

His face softened. "Oh ok. And why is it you're so behind on work? Been day-dreaming about my again have we?" he smirked.

Why did I have to mention that to him on our last date?

"Maybe," I blushed and he stroked my cheek with the back of his fingers.

"These are for you," he held the flowers forward, "I had this morning off and I was thinking about you and decided to come and visit and I know better than to turn up empty handed." He gestured to the flowers.

"Oh thanks," I said reluctantly taking the flowers with a fake smile… where was I going to put them now?

"Maybe I should have called first," his face fell, "I'll remember to do that."

"Oh don't worry about it." I hated seeing him look upset, "just, in future, don't visit me at work because my boss is an ass."

And because everyone will know I'm cheating on my husband.

"Call me when you have some time off and we can meet up on my lunch break or something."

"I will do. Well I'll leave you to get back to your work then." He looked angry at himself.

"See you." He leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek and then backed away obviously deterred by me pulling away earlier. I didn't want him to feel bad. So I quickly scanned the hall and put by hand round the back of his head and pulled him towards me. I plunged my tongue into his mouth and twisted my fingers in his hair. He returned the kiss almost instantly as our tongues mingled and I could taste how beautiful and sweet he was. I pulled away, gave him another quick peck on the lips and stepped back.

"Sorry, couldn't resist." I smiled cheekily, "you're just too gorgeous."

He chuckled, "don't resist on my account. In fact never resist on my account. Bye Bella." With that he turned around and walked away as I released a sigh of relief. That was close. Too close.

I looked down at the flowers in my hands; they were lilies. My favourite. Trust Edward to know that. I smiled to myself. I thought back to last years Valentines Day when Mike had got me the most horrible flowers ever. I always thought that all flowers were beautiful but Mike proved to me how very wrong I was. What would I do with them now? I could hardly take them back in the office as everyone would know who gave them to me. With a resigned sigh I thrust them into the bin next to me and walked back into the office.

Edward

Just tell her Edward.

Damn it, it's not a big deal. I just need to do this and get it out of my system.

No Edward you don't do something like this just to 'get it out of your system'!

Ever since that night where I discovered the truth depth of my feelings for Bella I had the burning desire to just tell her and blurt it out. I'd seen her once since then and my feelings had intensified. I'd decided on impulse to tell her and spent hours in the florist picking out the perfect flowers to give her. Then I'd headed straight over to her office walking with a spring in my step filled with anticipation over what I was about to do.

But standing here, right in front of her, was making me change my mind.

She didn't seem particularly happy to see me. Let alone happy enough for me to announce my undying love for her. This wasn't going well so far. She seemed almost ashamed to be seen with me.

Ashamed for crying out loud.

She said that it was because of her boss but there was a part of me that didn't believe her. I didn't know why. I decided to give her the flowers as I didn't know what else to say. I knew she'd love them.

"These are for you," I handed her the flowers, "I had this morning off and I was thinking about you and decided to come and visit and I know better than to turn up empty handed." I pointed to the flowers

"Oh thanks," she replied unsurely and obviously forcing a smile. Then she looked down at the flowers in her hands with a look of annoyance.

Not quite the thrilled response I was hoping for.

"Maybe I should have called first. I'll remember to do that." Me and my stupid impulses.

"Oh don't worry about it. Just, in future, don't visit me at work because my boss is an ass."

Blaming her boss again?

"Call me when you have some time off and we can meet up on my lunch break or something," she continued.

I was definitely not wanted at her work. Maybe it really was her boss. I didn't want her getting fired because of me. And telling her that I love her when she is obviously so stressed doesn't seem like the best idea. This was a very bad idea. Or am I just making up excuses?

"I will do. Well I'll leave you to get back to your work then."

I'm such a fucking coward.

"See you." I leaned in to kiss her cheek but then changed my mind after she rejected me earlier. Then out of nowhere she pulled me into a full on kiss. I wasn't complaining because it was fucking brilliant.

"Sorry, couldn't resist." she smiled sweetly with her eyes now glistening; "you're just too gorgeous."

She seemed to have lightened up now which was good and seeing her feel better made me feel better so I couldn't help but laugh.

"Don't resist on my account. In fact never resist on my account. Bye Bella."

I turned away to leave the building. What was I thinking coming to her work like this? Of course she wouldn't be expecting me to turn up and it was hardly a romantic setting for declaring my love.

But I wanted to tell her so badly. I wanted to express my love to her and let her know how amazing I thought she was. That couldn't be a bad thing could it? I'm sure she'd love for me to tell her. I wanted her to know that I loved her and if she didn't say it back then it would be ok. I'd give her time. That's all I wanted. Time with her. I'm going to tell her. She has to know how much I care for her and worship her.

Why do I keep changing my damn mind?

I turned round immediately and walked straight back into the hallway with a new found confidence.

I was going to tell her! A massive grin spread across my face.

But the grin disappeared in an instant when I saw Bella throwing the flowers I gave her into the trash.

Just like they were a piece of rubbish and not her favourite flowers.

Like I hadn't poured my heart and soul out to her and tried to show it through those flowers.

Like I didn't matter enough for her to accept something as simple as flowers.

Like she didn't care for me and certainly didn't love me.

Like she never would.

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I am glad that 30 people now have me on story alert. YAY.

Could I go for 30 reviews on this chapter? Probably not.

How about at least 15?

Let's give it a go guys :)