You Jump, I jump
Written by StrawberryGirl87
Hogwarts no longer feels like home, it is time to move on but Harry has nowhere else to go. Standing on the precipice of uncertainty he finds a helping hand from the most unlikely of people. Someone who is willing to stand by his side when things seem bleak.
Chapter Nineteen
Harry apperated to the Leaky Cauldron just as Hermione has asked him to. He almost thought that he had been splinched with the amount of pain that he was in when he had arrived. It took him several moments for him to realise that he hadn't been splinched at all and the pain that he was feeling was his heart breaking at leaving Draco behind.
At first he couldn't go inside, struggling to find the will power to go and see Hermione instead of going back to Draco. All he had was the phone in his jean pocket and his wand, he had left Draco with everything else. A sign that he would be coming back. He hoped that it would be enough for him. He just needed some time to figure things out. At least Hermione supported him when it came to Draco, maybe he could talk things through with her.
However when he saw her he knew that she wouldn't want to talk about his relationship with Draco, her eyes were red from crying and she looked as if she hadn't slept a wink. He knew that he had been the cause of this and he hated that Ron had taken it so badly. He hadn't realised how much his relationship with Draco would hurt Ron as much as this, enough to hurt Hermione, the woman he had loved for seven years whether he had realised it or not.
She stood up and hugged him when he approached her. She had chosen a table towards the rear of the pub and halfway in the shadows so it would be hard to spot them. The embrace was not something he had been expecting but he accepted it without a word. She had done him a great service the day before and it was clear that she was paying for it dearly now.
"What happened?" Harry asked her as they took their seats.
"Ron left me, at least I think he did, he can't look at me, won't talk to me."
"I'm so sorry Hermione. I never imagined that he would act like this. If I had known then I never would have asked you to do this."
"Harry …" Hermione said, unable to see how he could be so clueless. "How can you not see why he would be this upset?" She asked him, pain evident in her face as she spoke. "After everything he's done and you can't imagine that Ron might be this upset?"
"I don't understand, why did you help me then?" Harry asked her as he watched his best friend completely shatter into a million tiny emotional fragments of her former self.
"Because you clearly care about him, I only wanted you to be happy but it's cost me everything Harry. Draco did unspeakable things, giving that cursed necklace to Katie Bell, he almost poisoned and killed Ron in his quest to kill Dumbledore. He watched when Bellatrix tortured me and he did nothing to stop it."
"But he did good too," Harry said in protest.
"I know he did and I love you for only seeing the good in people Harry I really do but think of how he acted all throughout our time at school, he relished the fact that he was the son of a deatheater, he was proud of it. Money and status are all that matter to him. How do you know he isn't just using you to stay out of Azkaban? You can't tell me that you have any proof other than his word that he isn't."
"I know he lowered his wand that night on the Astronomy tower, he would never have killed Dumbledore, I know that he didn't identify me to Bellatrix when he knew that it was me and I know that his mother saved my life in the forbidden forest."
"Just because he lacked the courage of his convictions doesn't mean he's a good person Harry," Hermione said pointedly. "He told Bellatrix that it was Ron and me, who else would you have been? I don't think that you can trust him and I don't want to see you hurting."
"Is Ron really mad?" Harry asked feeling his heart sink as if it were a rock in the ocean as Hermione nodded her head.
"You can't go back to him Harry, he isn't right for you, it's been splashed across every wizarding publication apart from the Quibbler, pictures of the two of you together at the Ministry of magic. Claim enchantment, say it was a brief fling, anything but you can't go back to him."
"I can't do that," Harry said breathlessly, the idea of leaving Draco horrifying. "I love him Mione, more than anything in my entire life. You and Ron mean everything to me but what I feel for him … it doesn't compare."
"Ron won't forgive you Harry, not after everything Draco did to him and to me. You've been obsessed with him since sixth year that's all this is, obsession. It isn't love, it can't be love."
"Harry Potter?" A male voice said, Harry turned to see who had spoken his name and saw an older gentleman looked ashen faced and furious. Harry didn't recognise him and wasn't in the mood to talk to other people. His heart ached horribly at his separation from Draco and his brain was clouded by his talk with Hermione. He certainly wasn't prepared for what happened next. "This is for Katie," The older gentleman had said before his fist had connected with his jaw.
When Harry looked up the older man was gone and Hermione had leapt from her seat to see if any serious damage had been done. "What was that for?" harry asked as he rubbed at his jaw that felt tender to the touch. It would bruise but nothing had been broken fortunately.
"I think that might have been Katie Bell's father," Hermione informed him sadly.
"Why would he want to punch me?" Harry asked in shock, not connecting the dots. Hermione gave him a sad look before shaking her head, realising that he truly couldn't work out what the Bell family had against him.
"Draco could have killed Katie Harry, she almost died, she was in St Mungos for months after she put on that cursed necklace. It was never meant for her, it was meant for Dumbledore but she was the one who got hurt. I'm guessing they wanted Draco to pay for what they did to her."
"Oh," Harry said a little shocked. Of course he hadn't forgotten but he believed that Draco had changed, he wanted to be different. He had to cling to that, he had to believe that the cruel deatheater, the snobbish spoilt brat was no more. He hadn't been that way when they had been together. He had been someone else, someone kind and beautiful, at least he had to him.
"There will be others Harry, there are a lot of people that have been hurt by the Malfoy's and you just let them walk free because of your feelings, which I still can't believe are love. I think we need to get you away from him for a while."
"Mione …" Harry began but he could see how much she was hurting and he had been the one to cause that. He missed Draco terribly but he couldn't destroy Hermione for him, he just couldn't do it. He loved her too much. She was like the sister that he had never had. The Weasley's were the closest thing that he had to family, he couldn't turn his back on them, not after everything that they had done for him. "Okay," Harry said realising that he needed to listen to Hermione at least for a while.
He had been so wrapped up in Draco, their relationship intense and passionate, he couldn't even tell if what he was feeling was obsession or love. When he was with the Slytherin everything seemed so simple, so clean cut. Now that they were apart he ached for him, yearned for him desperately but that didn't make it right.
"You won't go back to him?" She asked looking into his eyes and seeing the unmistakable pain that echoed in his brilliantly green iris'. It hurt her to see him like that but she wanted him back, she had to prove to Ron that he wasn't fucked up beyond repair. Their Harry was still here, the war hadn't destroyed him.
"Not for the moment, I can't make any promise to you other than that. It hurts Mione, to be away from him, I miss him so much. I'm not sure how long I'll be able to do it but I'll try. If that is what it takes for you and Ron to work things out then I'll do it. I can't lose either of you, I'm not going to make a choice between you two and Draco. You may not believe it but I do love him, with every fibre of my being. I'm going to do everything I can to make you both see that and accept him. I've been through too much with you two. You're my best friends, I'll do whatever it takes."
"And what happens if Ron can't accept it, what will you do then?" Hermione asked, she felt unbelievably saddened at the anguish in her best friends voice and wasn't sure what to think anymore. She had helped him because she didn't want him hurt and she had lost Ron because of her actions. By trying to make it up to him and talk to Harry she was still hurting him. She didn't know what to do. Those two boys meant everything to her and nothing she did seemed to work out how she wanted it to.
"I can't think like that," He answered her honestly, "I have to try." She nodded her head in understanding. She at least had Harry back with her now, it wouldn't take long for him to forget about Draco, she needed to believe that because then everything could go back to normal between them. Ron would hold the grudge for a while but maybe when Harry and Ginny started dating that would change. They would have their friendship back and everything would be as good as it had been before the war. She could only hope that that was the case anyway.