Im so sorry - its been so long since i last updated! - i kept typing bits and pieces but it took forever to actually finish it and i had to split up a chapter too (so the next ones already written and wont take as long for me to update

oh, and im using most (if not all) ideas suggested to me so dont think ive ignored them if they arent in thsi chapter... theyre on their way ) - again big big thanks to yukibozu, torakama, Merridaine, starlit.kiss7, dailyangel, you.broke.a.promise, Gothic Saku-chan and cutegerbilofdeath - so many reviewers! thanks so, so much - it means a lot and motivates me to keep writing

Masked Happiness

Chapter 4: Discoveries

'Sakura… Sakura! Pay attention!' Kakashi's voice rang through her head

'Huh, what? Oh, sorry sensei' Sakura said blushing as everyone in the class sniggered. Kakashi sighed, exasperated and muttered to himself so that all that could be heard was disjointed sentences,

'Don't know why I bother…could be reading right now…'

After a few minutes Kakashi had continued his lecture on bloodline traits and the different clans and Sakura was once again staring out the window cradling her head in her hand, lost in thought. It had been three days since she had promised herself not to cut anymore… and then had straight afterwards.

That day had gotten worse though. She only left the training grounds once the bleeding had stopped and her sleeves were safely covering her secret again. She went straight home after that because she knew that she was late for tea and her mother would be waiting. Sure enough her mum was dishing up tea when she walked in, her hunger pushing all other thoughts from her mind. Her mother started telling Sakura about her day as she handed her the salad bowl and without thinking Sakura, always organised, rolled up her sleeves and began serving her and her mum the salad.

'So I said to her…Sakura!' her mother exclaimed.

'You said that to her?'

'No, your arm! What happened?!'

Sakura inwardly cringed at her thoughtlessness wanting nothing more than to evaporate, just vanish. 'crap, what do I do now' her eyes darting unconsciously, as if looking for an escape route and knowing that her mother knew exactly what she'd been doing, having been caught out before. It was not one of her fondest memories and definitely wasn't an experience she had wanted to repeat, but it looked as though she had no choice now.

'Why would you do such awful things to yourself?! Do you hate yourself that much?!' she screeched and her faint disgust at the marks on her arm that Sakura was hurriedly re-covering did not go unnoticed. 'Here we go'

'I don't hate myself mum'

'Is it something I've done? Do you hate me that much?!'

Sakura could've laughed at the insanity.

'No mum, it's not about you at all' Seeing her mothers teary eyes and hurt reaction to this made her sigh. Standing up she walked around the table and forgotten food and hugged her mum as she explained how stupid it was and how she had stopped (luckily her mother had only seen her arm from a distance so she didn't see that some were fresh), and how she would never ever do it again. She could tell that her mother was still upset about it but knew what would happen. They ate their tea and kept talking, albeit hesitantly to begin with, but avoided that subject completely and by the next morning it was like it had never happened at all. You see that's one of the conditions of having a cheery, happy mother… ignorance is bliss and anything that threatens that happiness is rightly ignored.

'Sakura?'

'Huh?' Sakura said distantly for the second time that day as she looked up and found Naruto poking her in the shoulder, trying to get her attention.

'Um, class is over.'

Sakura looked around and realised that Kakashi was behind his desk, nose stuck in his little orange heaven, Sasuke was putting his books away into his backpack and apart from the four of them, everyone else had left.

'Oh, I guess I didn't hear the bell' Sakura muttered thinking 'yeah, memories of your mother dismissing you and your 'problems' completely will make you a bit spacey'. She looked up and saw Naruto looking at her worriedly and quickly smiled.

'I'm fine,' she assured him 'just hungry, let's go grab lunch'.

The three of them decided to walk to Ichiraku ramen bar for lunch before they began that days training. The walk was fairly quite as usual, but it wasn't the normal, comfortable silence that generally surrounded the three friends, it was slightly, almost unnoticeably tense. Sasuke seemed to be deeper in thought than usual, with his hands in his pockets and his eyes slightly downcast and fixed on the path ahead. It was as though he wasn't even there.

Naruto on the other hand was making himself painfully obvious as he tried but failed miserably at hiding his concern for Sakura. She tried to smile as much as possible so that he would stop worrying but she found her mask harder to maintain than usual and every so often her smile would slip before she could stop it, only making Naruto worry more. When they got to Ichiraku they ordered some ramen from Teuchi, who grinned broadly at his favourite customer (Naruto) before he joined Ayame in the kitchen.

Sasuke ate his in silence, Naruto… not so much. Unnoticed by the other two, Sakura just poked at her lunch. She felt a little hungry but she didn't want to eat. It had been happening more and more lately, either complete loss of appetite would stop her from eating or she just had no desire to. It was beginning to get annoying but at the same time she liked the way she was getting a little thinner lately and how eating less seemed to be a fairly easy thing to hide…unlike other, more obvious addictions.

Sakura sat for a while longer, moving her lunch around so that it looked like she had actually eaten some before excusing herself to go to the bathroom. Once she got back Naruto and Sasuke were done with their meals.

'Shall we?' asked Sakura, indicating that they should leave to go to training. Naruto looked at her bowl, still completely full although she might have had a bit; he had been too focused on his own lunch to notice. Sasuke also noticed her uneaten lunch and raised an eyebrow quizzically as Naruto said uncertainly,

'Are you sure your done?' Sakura smiled,

'Yeah, I had a massive breakfast, but we should really get going'. Both Sasuke and Naruto shrugged it off as the idea of training brought their focus to each other and the constant competition that each swore they wouldn't lose.

As usual Sasuke and Naruto faced off, oblivious to everything else as Sakura walked away, thoughts drifting lazily as she watched the trees swaying in the wind. She roamed until eventually her feet led her to the clearing where she spent most of her time. She lay down in the middle of it, in no mood to train, the soft, green grass pressing softly into her back as she watched the clouds drift ever so slowly across the sky.

She didn't know how long she'd been lying there or if she had even fallen asleep or not, but a rustle in the bushes somewhere behind her made her jump and instantly all of her senses were awake and alert. She stayed exactly where she was, listening intently for any further noises that might indicate who or what was nearby.

Her ears picked up on yelling, so faint that she thought she could have imagined it for a minute before she heard it again.

'Naruto?' she whispered, recognizing his voice instantly, panic rising as she heard it in his voice too.

She jumped to her feet and had only taken one step before having to throw herself back down to avoid the kunai flying at her head. She stood up quickly, whirling around to find the person responsible. The person was a bit taller than her with blood-red hair. That was all she saw before something large rose up in front of her. 'I must be losing it' she thought, quickly trying to dodge what seemed to be a wall of sand.

She wasn't fast enough and gasped in pain as the sand wrapped tightly around her arms to stop her from moving. Her eyes watered in pain as the cuts up her arm were gripped in the merciless hold of the sand, and for a moment the grip remained the same before loosening slightly so that she couldn't move still but the excruciating pain in her arm dulled to a throbbing ache. She looked up at her captor, trying to pretend she wasn't gasping for air as his emotionless eyes bored into her, secretly puzzled by what had just happened.

They both reacted (him much less noticeably) when they heard the distant yelling of Naruto again. Hearing this, the panic rising once more, Sakura struggled against her quite strange bonds, trying to get to Naruto and Sasuke to help in some way, hoping desperately that they were ok. Her 'enemy' turned away from the sounds and looked at her again.

Sakura mentally kicked herself (not really in a situation which allowed her to do it for real) as she felt more pain in her arm, knowing exactly what had happened. He knew too, his expression showing nothing as his secret curiosity doubled. She felt blood running down her arm, mingling with sand and knew that her struggling had caused quite a few of her cuts to grate on the sand and re-open.

Quite badly too she realised as her head felt a little lighter and she felt her energy draining bit by bit. Suddenly the sand loosened its hold on her, letting her go altogether. She fell to her knees, lacking the energy to stand for the moment and lifted her head to find that her mysterious foe had disappeared. Dazed and confused, Sakura stood shakily before picking up on the sound of fighting and running off in that direction.

ooooh, my first real cliffy - sorry to do that but it was the best spot to cut the massive chapter in half (and i didnt want to type the whole thing now but i was so late i thought i should at least update something - pleeeeease review and stuff - only way to know if im doing stuff right or wrong and what to do and not to (not to mention the more reviews i get the more i feel like continuing to write and the faster ill update (aw, that came out sounding mean lol) - i'll update very soon - promise!!!