Note: First Story, criticism accepted, no insults- enjoy

Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. I, by no rights or circumstances, own Kore wa Zombie Desu Ka? Kore wa Zombie Desu Ka? Of the Dead. Please support the following release.

Is This a College?

Chapter 3: Haruna the Genius?

The first month of school past by so fast, I had no time to adjust to all that's been happening. I haven't even unpacked all my stuff. My hand-me-down TV was still sitting in its box, waiting and collecting dust. A few clothes and posters sit in my unorganized cupboard. The only thing that was organized was my schedule. Wake up, eat breakfast, get dressed, etc. In that schedule, on a school break, I meet with what others considered 'The Outcast group'.

I was an outcast because I refused to defend myself against that still unnamed person. Eu was an outcast because of her muteness. Sera, Yuki, and Sarasvati were outcast because of their hostility and gossiping. That one chest-nut haired girl, Haruna, joined us last week. She said our table required some of her 'genius'.

I thought of her as a strange person trying to bully us for respect, but this was quite the opposite…

"If you're gonna man up, you need to start throwing more punches!" Haruna yelled.

She was trying to get me to fight her. She would hurl insults at me and throw a few punches, if you could call them that, to provoke me to fight back. I saw no reason to fight back because I could easily dodge her 'punches'. When she did make contact with me, it would feel like a light shove. Her insults would be almost as pathetic as her punches. "You call yourself Ayumu Aikawa? More like Ayumu Aika-what!" Haruna laughed hysterically at her own joke while I only stared.

I took my opportunity and grabbed her arms and pinned her. She was too shocked to even counter me. When I released her, she yelled that I cheated and then demanded a rematch against me. I would usually shake my head and moan in frustration. But it was more entertaining than annoying, but just barely.

It was the next day at lunch. Eu, Haruna, and Sera had gotten some soup. Yuki and Sarasvati had taken some chicken. I had only taken a small bag of chips because the focus was on the papers in my hands.

I was trying to fill out a few resumes for a few local markets and restaurants to get a job to help pay for college and even for a few movies and games. Haruna decided to make this her time to shine. "Ayumu, why are you filling these out by yourself? You know you'll screw up without my guidance," she said in a taunting voice.

I was purely frustrated with the fact that she was making it seem like she was Einstein. I was sick of it. As she was making a grab for my papers, I pushed them out of her reach and stood up," Haruna, I am a growing man, and I know how to fill out a resume."

She pouted at first, but she stood her ground." Yeah, you should put emphasis on the 'growing man' part. Unlike you, my brain is already beyond fully developed," she said with her same know-it-all tone with her hands slammed on the table.

I was about to make a comment to what she said, when I noticed something on the table. I decided to point the accident on the table to Haruna. "Hey genius, you slammed your fist in your soup."

Her face froze for a moment. She slowly looked down to notice a small puddle of the soup flooding on the table. She had also noticed the others had lifted up their bowls and plates. They only stared at the scene before them. I swear, I saw steam fly right out of Haruna's ears as she tried to say some rude comment to me. But to my surprise, she merely pulled out her chair and began to walk away.

I looked at the others to find out what I should do next, but they only shrugged. The only one who did something was Eucliwood, who pointed in the direction Haruna ran off in. I was about to object when she pulled out a notepad that said the intimidating word 'Now!', and with that I started a slow dash after her.

I had found her standing near the same bench where Eu and I had met. She was trying to get something out of the soda machine. She was frustrated heavily so I could only imagine the machine stole her money.

But that wasn't it at all. She, again, amazed me with what she was doing. She was continuously pushing the 'Cherry Coke' button, trying to get one out. When I started to get closer I noticed the problem with what she was doing. The 'Cherry Cokes' were all out.

"You recommended Cherry Coke…" she said staring at me. "Right?"

I knew what she was talking about. I recommended Cherry Coke to Eu when she got one, now Haruna wanted to confirm if that was still my recommendation. "Yeah, but there's no more." I said softly.

She sighed in the soft but frustrated way. "I have the feeling you don't really like me," she said sadly.

At this I gaped. I, with that misunderstanding, started to stutter like a moron," W-w-w-what!? I'm f-flattered, I really am…"

I first felt some kind of moisture feeling on my head, then the impact of an object and lastly felt pain and moisture at the same time. My hand instinctively moved to my head to find a bowl of soup pouring down my face. I turned around to see Seraphim look at me disgusted," You piece of shit, she wasn't talking about that!" She yelled right in my face.

I was, at first, oblivious to the comment. But I turned quickly to Haruna. "Haruna, I'm sorry for my misunderstanding. I do like you, as a friend of course, and I don't want you to leave our little group at the table!"

She was quiet, but she was visibly relieved. This moment could have actually gone better and longer, had Yuki not come out of nowhere at this specific moment," We don't want this to happen again, do we?" she said brightly. We both shook our heads with blank and confused faces. "Then we obviously need to sort out our issues with, not only you two, all of us."

By then, I was lost. I was hoping we would just tackle problems as they go, but we're all going to talk it out or something. "And how do we solve all of our problems, exactly?" Haruna had questioned.

"Simple, we play the 'Pros and Cons' game," Yuki said as if it was the obvious thing ever.

I had no idea why we had to use my dorm to play this game. This game when explained was actually an easy to understand game. Whoever is it spins a bottle and whoever it points to you say something good about them and something bad. Simply said, complicatedly done. I was, of course, the first person to spin this bottle. Of all people to point to, it pointed to Seraphim. I just said what my mind told. "Your pro is that you aren't afraid to express yourself, your con is you're too violent when doing so."

I was amazed she didn't punch me, but then again it was against the rules. She did however growl at me dangerously. But she spun and it pointed at Haruna. "You're very entertaining during your moments, and your very annoying during so."

Now I could see that Haruna was pissed at that. But she spun her turn and we all went on and about, hurling compliments and insults at each other. When it was my turn again, it pointed at Eu. I could easily think of something that was good about her, but what about something bad. Saying she's too quiet would make me out to be an ass after I told her to talk however she wants. So I started off," You are very accepting of others and are calm when we make ourselves out as idiots…"

I think for a moment about what I could say. But then it something hits me and I pray it is taken seriously." …you're also to low on self-confidence."

I notice a rare small look of surprise before she just flashes a smile before reverting back to herself.

It was a helluva night, that night. We played for a bit longer before we all went back to our dorms. I again found myself thinking as I begin to get all snug in the bed. A thought flashed in my mind of Eu and her smiles. I thought for a moment and realized that I was developing some kind of chees-ily growing crush on her. I just sat up and said to myself," A mute girl and a sarcastic boy together? Didn't realize this was a dramatic reality show."

I laughed at my little joke before nodding off in sleep