A Fallen Angel
Prologue
"The Animal I Have Become…"
{Goodbye}…
{Goodbye}…
{Goodbye}…
A remorse to my abandoned shell;
A crystal tear for my black, black heart;
~Oh~
As the evil king;
of the darkest thrones
takes me away
to his vast lands of
bittersweet darkness
A last;
{Goodbye}…
{To what I should be}…
No one could see the birth of crystal, crystal tears that were trapped between the black, black lashes…fallen upon my sick; ill-willed yellow eyes; resembling a widow's ebony veil of a living grief…wanting to cry, cry and cry as I keep fall, fall and fall! Yet; I did not let them see my agony.
I did not want to become a monster.
No one could hear the bittersweet song of my drowning soul…crying, whimpering, shouting for a helping hand; amongst the dark, dark sea of a forest emerald eyed; white, white snake's droplets of violet curse. I did not let them hear my breathless, pale pleas.
I listened the snake.
I let him trap me in his webs of fallen lambs of God.
Why?!
No one could feel my shivering; quivering fright as though I was left in a frozen world of an endless winter; the ruthless, merciless ice queen scratching my bleeding flesh; deepening my wounds more and more. I could not speak; I could no longer see the path to my heart's house. I could only…fear within my castle of creeping darkness…What am I to become? When did the abandoned streets that became a guard less home for crawling pieces of a fake Eden became my home?
Why did you leave me to the hands of your own fallen angel, God…?
Why did you forsake me?
Why…!
W…hy…
I was laying upon the thick and long gown of the golden brown earth; the beautiful emerald grass began to harbor a shade beneath the gaze of a blanket of night sky; a wrinkled; worn piece of paper clutched between my curling; whiteness hazed fingers. Words; only words. The pleas I could not sing to my own God; afraid, afraid of the big and bad snake that towered upon my fallen body; resembling a servant to a cruel, cruel master; on my knees that become a morning dew canvas for drawn lines of an ablazed scarlet; the wounds that cannot be cured.
Hear me.
Help me.
Save me.
Please…Tell me it is not too late…
That…There is still time…!
"...Tch..."
The narrowed; angered yellow eyes of a howling; restless animal lowered and lowered themselves until they befallen upon the crawling; creeping thin river of blood…reaching for my midnight blackness tangled glove…still traveling for my moon glazed fingertips that rested upon the soft patches of swaying grass; with the gentle wind of moon's reign.
"Blood, huh?"
A born smirk upon the mocking pinkness of my lips. I was a beautiful angel sent from the heavens…on outside…Such a masque; a masquerade of wolves. I knew where this sea of redness came from; I did not care though. I just watched and watched the dried; wretched strain, trace the droplets left upon my ocean blue dyed sleeve, my blackness kissed glove and my whiteness hazed fingertips…admiring…Red did look good on me.
The fake Eden I took.
The heaven's bliss they said.
A numbing; soothing and timeless liquid inside a syringe; must be crushed aroma of distant African herbs.
…Forgive me for my sins. My god…
A middle fingertip that began to shine in a pretty color of angelic whiteness and demonic redness of my body; rose to my puckered; oval shaped lips. My finger was drenched in scarlet wetness and the naughty digit that began to part my perfect lips from each other's embrace was slippery as though a glass of water was poured upon porcelain white tile of bathroom.
"…h…ha…m…"
I was a fucking sinner, I knew. Although I wanted the growing and growing darkness inside my weeping heart fade away; although I sought for my silent prayers reach the ruler of the blue, blue skies and a changing world…I fucking loved being a stray dog.
The luring plumpness opened and closed; opened and closed around my poor, poor finger that began to drip with my leaking wetness; my sweet syrup of saliva. The fingertips that were curling around the paper of my own handwriting began to loosen their hold when my swaying lashes underneath a gentle breeze began to hide my glowering yellow eyes in a growing ecstasy.
"Fuck…mh...the…God..."
The red little tongue of mine curled around my restless finger; resembling a finely tuned instrument of master musician's collection. The sounds of sucking, lapping, the wet; slippery tangling of flesh against one another…With a pleasing sound of 'pop' my finger fell from the clutches of my hungry lips.
You can never forgive me..right..Kami~sama?
My lean chest rose and fell; rose and fell with each calm; soothed breath as my pink petaled lips rested against each other.
I just hope that your blessed wind would carry my words to your kingdom that I abandoned…
"…h...h…Hahaha!"
Back of my creamy hand reached to silence the sweet melodies of a mad man's fantasy when a slender; sleeved arm curled around my tensing abdomen muscles. I was fucking insane …!