First off, thank you all so much for the reviews. I love to hear what my readers think about my stories.
Second, I am well aware that the first part left a few of you with a lot of questions, like what about Nick and Marlo for example, and I hope I can answer them all in this second part. That's the problem with drabbles. They don't give any explanation of the character's actions. There is no backstory. Just one scene. Therefore I hardly write any drabbles since I like to delve into the minds of the characters.
But enough with the rambling. Here is the second part! I hope you enjoy!
Part 2
He was sitting in his truck in front of his house, his fingers gripping the wheel tightly, the urge to smack his head against it almost overwhelming. What had he been thinking?
He practically forced himself on her, letting his temper getting the better of him. But it had felt so good, having her in his arms again, kissing her again. He could still taste her on his lips, the desire still coursing through his body, not as hot as it had while he was kissing her but he still ached for her.
It was a small wonder that she hadn't slapped him. And what of a hypocrite he had been? Telling her that Nick couldn't ignite this kind of passion in her. He actually didn't know that. Maybe she was happy with Nick. The fact that he wasn't truly happy with Marlo didn't mean it had to be the same for her.
Even months later when he closed his eyes he could still see the hurt expression on her face as she'd seen them kissing in the kitchen, the shrugging of her shoulders telling him how he could have told her he loved her and would do anything to prove it to her six months earlier just to be together with another woman when she came back.
He had wanted to grab her and shake her in that moment, wanted to shout at her that she had left him again, that she had broken his heart into a million pieces. He had told her while she had been holding that bomb that he wished she could read his mind because it was so hard for him to find the right words, to tell her how he felt about her. When they had talked in his truck about what had happened to them he had wanted to tell her that he was still in love with her that getting together with Marlo was his way to try to move on. Because she had left him. Again! But he couldn't tell her. All he was able to say was ... she isn't you. The fear that she would rip his heart out again keeping all the other things he wanted to say stuck in his throat.
She didn't choose him. She'd chosen her work over him. She ran away. But how could he blame her? He was the one who had pushed her away. They had been great together. The months he'd spent with her had been the happiest months of his life. But she also made him feel too much. He had always been a lone wolf. Not needing anyone. Not wanting to be too dependent on anyone else. But since she stepped into his life everything had changed. She'd turned his world upside down, making it impossible for him to imagine a life without her in it.
God, he had been fooling himself. He had chosen Marlo because it was easier, less complicated. He had chosen Marlo because he wasn't in love with her. Because she would never be able to hurt him like Andy did. He had been lying to Marlo and himself.
"In the past, my ass." He muttered under his breath, pinching his nose with his fingers.
Nothing was in the past. He had just mashed it down so deep that he even made himself believe that it was over. That he was really moving on from her. But his feelings hadn't changed, they'd always lingered under the surface ready to explode right into his face.
His gaze wandered to the house and the light shining through the window. He should go inside. Marlo was waiting for him. He'd told her he would only go for a quick drink. How should he have known that he would ran into Andy in the parking lot, getting into an argument and ending up kissing her senseless against the wall?
Sighing heavily, he grabbed his key and excited the car, cursing his life for being so messed up. A beautiful, funny woman was waiting for him to come home but he didn't want her. He was exhausted. But he had to tell her that it was over. As soon as possible. She deserved to know the truth. She didn't deserve to be kept in the dark about his feelings.
"Everything okay?" Marlo asked him the moment he stepped into the kitchen, apparently his facial expression giving him away.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Sam replied, walking to the refrigerator to take out a beer. Turning around, he leaned against the kitchen counter, meeting Marlo's gaze and taking in a deep breath he steeled himself for the inevitable talk. "Actually, no. I'm not fine. We need to talk."
"McNally!" Marlo said after a few moments of silence. It wasn't a question. As if she'd known all along that it would come to this point.
"Yes, McNally!
~S&A~
She had been tossing around in bed all night, unable to get any sleep. Angry with herself for not being able to just forget about the kiss and his atrocious ultimatum.
Was he serious? As if she would just show up on his doorstep so that he could take her? Who did he think he was?
Kissing him was a moment of weakness, both caught up in the heat of the moment. But it would not happen again. She was with Nick and he was with Marlo. They were happy, weren't they? At least she was happy, right? She ignored the nagging voice in her head who kept asking her if she really was happy.
Sam and she were over. Done. There was nothing between them anymore. Nothing.
She was running on her eighth cup of coffee as Oliver pulled the car into the parking lot. Her head was hammering and she just wanted to go home. Hopefully her body would be so exhausted that she would get some sleep tonight.
Climbing tiredly out of the car, she leaned against it for a second, her eye catching a movement and she tilted her head slowly to not increase the pounding in her head.
Sam and Marlo.
Why in hell did they have to be in the parking lot right now? What did she do to deserve this? As if her day wasn't horrible enough already.
She didn't know if she made a sound or if Oliver just sensed that something was off as he followed her gaze.
"You know, he broke up with her yesterday."
"What?" Andy said, needing a few seconds before her tired brain was able to comprehend what he had just told her.
"Sam and Marlo." Oliver clarified. "They aren't together anymore."
"They aren't?" Andy asked, whipping her head around to follow Sam's truck with her eyes until it rounded the corner.
He broke up with her? Yesterday? After he'd kissed the living hell out of her?
Her heart thumped hard against her ribcage and she leaned back against the car, her legs suddenly felt too weak to support her weight. It couldn't be a coincidence. The kiss must have been the reason he ended things with Marlo.
But where did that leave her? What was she supposed to do now?
His ultimatum had sounded more like a threat, his words suggesting that he just wanted to jump into bed with her and spend a night with mindblowing fantastic sex. But did she really believe he would cheat? After he'd been so outraged when he found out that Luke had cheated on her? Of course he wouldn't.
But it didn't mean anything. Not for her. She was fine. Everything was just fine. She didn't want Sam. She didn't need him.
"Are you coming?" Oliver's question yanked her out of her raging thoughts and she looked over at him, shaking her head.
"In a minute."
Closing her eyes, she tried to steady herself but realized instantly that closing her eyes had been a huge mistake. Images of his face popped up in her brain, reminding her of the heated looks he was always giving her, the looks that always made her want to grab him and yank him into a corner and just go for it. Suddenly all the memories of their time together slammed into her, making tears rising up in her chest.
Taking in a shuddering breath, she opened her eyes, a lonely tear trailing down her cheek. Who was she kidding? She wanted him. She wanted him back. She was still in love with him and the last months hadn't changed that.
It was time to talk to Nick.
She had called Nick, telling him he should meet her for dinner at her apartment. Though she didn't have the slightest appetite she stopped for groceries on her way home, feeling as if she would prepare him his last meal.
She shouldn't feel that nervous. After all they didn't put a label on their relationship yet and he deserved to know the truth. He was too good to be a rebound guy. She should have never slept with him in the first place. But she had and then they just kept on sleeping together. It was comfortable, simple. But it wasn't love. She wasn't in love with him.
"Andy, what's wrong?" His voice broke the silence and she realized they hadn't said a word since they'd sat down at the table and started eating. "You keep pushing your food around the plate without eating anything. Tough case?"
"No. It's not a case." She replied quietly, shifting uncomfortable on her chair, not sure how to approach the subject.
"Swarek!" He let his name out on a sigh but she couldn't detect any surprise in his voice.
"Yes, it's Sam." She admitted slowly, averting her gaze to her plate again.
"I should have known." He said quietly. "You remembered his number."
"Number?" Andy asked, looking up surprised. "What are you talking about?"
"Remember the warehouse?" Andy just nodded, clearly remembering the minutes she'd feared for both their lives. "When you just dialed a number without realizing whose number it was? You were scared, you needed help, and your subconscious went immediately out to him."
"We were partners. I must have dialed his number a thousand times." Andy replied, not sure why she tried to talk her way out of it. Because Nick was right. Whenever she was in trouble she turned to Sam.
"I've seen the way you two were looking at each other when he rescued us. I've seen it and I still hoped we two might have a chance. I was a fool to believe you might actually fall in love with me one day if I would just give you a little time. It will always be him."
"Nick, I'm sorry."
"The heart wants what it wants, right? And apparently your heart wants Sam. He has no idea how lucky he is."
~S&A~
Sam's eyes went to the clock at the wall for the umpteenth time. Five minutes before midnight. She wouldn't come. He knew she wouldn't come. He didn't know why he hadn't talked to her about it the whole week. He should have apologized for his rude behavior but something had held him back. A sliver of hope he couldn't suppress. Hope that he didn't screw everything up, that she somehow understood without him actually telling her that he wanted her back, that he was still in love with her, that he wanted another chance.
His eyes flickered back to the clock again and as he stared at it the numbers changed, telling him that it was exactly midnight. The seven days were over. She didn't come. The disappointment slammed right into him, a sharp pain shooting straight through his heart. He had pushed too hard. He should have talked to her, should have explained his actions. Leaning forward, he buried his head in his hands, contemplating if he should get wasted.
His eyes snapped open when he heard a knock at the door but he kept frozen to the spot, wondering if he had just imagined it but then he heard it again and he jumped up from the chair, knocking it over as he rushed to the door and yanked it open.
She was here. On his doorstep. She came.
"I didn't think you would show up."
"Why?" She said quietly. "Because you were being an ass?
"Yeah! Because I was being an ass." Sam replied. "Come on in."
He followed her into the living room, suddenly very self-conscious about what he should say to her but then his eyes met hers and the words just tumbled out of his mouth.
"I'm sorry, Andy. Sorry for not waiting for you. Sorry for being such a coward. Sorry for going all cave man on you last week. I shouldn't have kissed you. I shouldn't have said the things I said. I had no right to throw those accusations at you. Not to mention giving you an ultimatum. Because it's not about the sex, you know? It was never only about the sex. I was frustrated. With you. With the situation. But especially with myself. I wanted you so much that it physically hurt and then you kissed me back and everything crashed down on me and something in me just snapped. Of course I would lie if I told you I didn't want you. But I want all of you. I want you back, Andy. I want another chance."
"I heard you broke up with Marlo?" Andy asked in a calm voice and Sam narrowed his eyes, wondering if she had even listened to him at all. But then he saw how her hands were shaking slightly before she balled them into fists. She had heard him but she apparently didn't want to give in so easily.
"Yes, because it's unfair to her. I can't be in a relationship with her when I'm in love with another woman."
"I see."
"What about Nick?"
"I told him I couldn't be with him." Andy replied but suddenly something snapped in her, the last week catching up on her, making her explode and she rushed over to him, boxing her fist into his stomach, feeling strangely satisfied when he doubled over and she slapped her hand against his arm, hissing angrily. "God, I hate you so much. I hate you for making me want you so much. I hate you for making me love you so much. Because God help me, I'm in love with you, Sam Swarek. Despite everything we've put each other through I still love you."
"And that's a reason to hit me?" Sam asked, rubbing his hand over his stomach.
"I should actually slap you silly for being such an idiot."
"That I am. But you love me anyway." Sam replied, cocking his head, his mouth turning up into a huge grin.
"Yes. I do." She spoke softly, brushing her fingers over his arm before she lifted her gaze to his face again. "Remember my talent?"
"You know when to quit?" Sam asked carefully, not knowing where she was going with it.
"The odds might be against us, everyone would say we can't last. That we are too different. But odds can change and in the end the odds don't matter. What other people think doesn't matter. Because I believe in us. Because I do believe the universe has a plan for us. It keeps pushing us back together and I'm tired to fight it anymore, Sam. I love you. I want to be with you."
"I'm so sorry, Andy." Sam said hoarsely, pulling her into his arms.
"So, clean slate?" Andy mumbled against his skin, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.
"Clean slate."
"Okay, since this is out of the way now." She leaned back, shooting him a devilish grin, her eyes twinkling with mischief. "I'm ready to be taken."
"You are?"
"You were right, you know. I want you as desperately as you want me and I missed being with you. In every way. So, how about you make good on your promise and make it last for hours?"
"As you wish." Sam leaned down and scooped her up into his arms and her grin widened as he carried her towards the bedroom.
This time they would last. She didn't know why she was so sure but looking into his eyes she just knew. This time it would be forever.
I have apparently severe McSwarek withdrawal symptoms. This is the third update in three days. What is kind of ridiculous since I started to watch the show only two weeks ago but the promo hit me right in the feels and makes me want to smack Sam over the head and since I can't do that I have to get them back together in fanfiction. Helps me keep my feels in check!
