Disclaimer: It's funny how you can ask a question over and over, and still get the same answer...

Author's Notes: Merry Christmas!

oOo

"Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says 'You.' After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done." -Jack Handy

oOo

Sakura trundled into the wide driveway, parking behind a blue Mercedes, and glared up at the two story house in front of her. It oozed expense and luxury, from the ornate carving around the door to the still-shiny copper of the roof spikes. For a debt-ridden intern slaving away at the local hospital, it was like a hundred years worth of grocery bills being sat on the front lawn waiting to be hacked apart by a mower.

Rich people, she thought, green. If I can't be one by myself, then I at least insist that they give me all that they own.

The thought made her smile.

"Alright, Hinata," she announced, shaking her friend's shoulder gently to get her attention. Hinata blinked, and turned her big baby blues on Sakura with a look of almost complete despair.

Sakura knew that look. It was her I'm-not-worthy look that she often had around her father—a look Hinata had only recently beaten.

Oh, this is not going to fly.

"Now, Honey," Sakura said, a little bit of her home Georgian drawl leaking into her voice. She always fell back on the accent when she was angry or particularly excited. Or both. "That man-" she jabbed a finger at the house. "Is not worth half of you. You are a successful, smart, beautiful, confident woman and I will not have you trying to convince yourself you're of some lower order because he has giant glass windows! I just won't have it. I have spent years watching you build up your confidence enough to escape that tyrannical father of yours, and I will not watch it come tumbling down for some blond man with a charming smile. Clear?"

Hinata laughed, nodding. "All right, all right, clear. No need to go rawr-feminist on me. Or break out The Dreaded Drawl."

"Sorry," Sakura said, abashed. "The, um, temper thing? I'm working on that. I promise. I've found this great technique for conquering it actually. Everytime I want to kill someone I go out and buy a pumpkin, stick a knife in its head, and attach a note that says 'you' to it and then play ding-dong ditch. It works wonders."

"These are the reasons I worry you're going to end up in a mental hospital."

"I'm in the medical profession, we're all mad there."

"That's quite enough out of you, Cheshire," Hinata said. "You want to come in with me?"

Sakura glanced back at the house, weighing the pros and cons in her mind. On the downside, she would have to see more generous expenditure by a wealthy ne'er-do-well, on the other she would get to see said ne'er-do-well and he would surely be very pretty. And she had never gotten around to threatening this Naruto character…

Well, that pretty much decides it, Sakura thought. "Sure, I'd love to! Do you need me to carry anything?"

Hinata shook her head, juggling the giant teddy-bear by herself as she got out of the car. It was half the size of the other woman, and Sakura couldn't say she would be surprise if it weighed the same amount. Poor dear looked like a strong gust could knock her off her feet.

Come to think of it, strong gusts of wind had.

Stepping out into the cold was an unpleasant experience, she could taste the chill. She hurried to the house, glad the driveway was clear and she didn't have to watch for patches of ice.

As they drew closer, Sakura heard raised voices—two men, she would guess—and raised an eyebrow at a worried-looking Hinata.

"D-do you think we should come back later?" Hinata chattered, shivering in her thick coat.

"Of course not," Sakrua said breezily. "We already drove all the way here didn't we?"

Hinata nodded reluctantly, but hurried up the steps. The thick walls kept them out of the icy wind.

Sakura paused to listen a moment before knocking, picking up brief snatches of whatever was being shouted.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO!"

"HE'S YOUR BROTHER!"

"I DON'T CARE! STAY OUT OF IT!"

"MAKE ME!"

"I CAN'T! I'M NOT LIKE YOU!"

"Hmm," she sniffed. Sounded like an argument that would degenerate into name-calling in just a moment anyway, no harm in interrupting that.

She knocked, and the voices cut off abruptly. She was surprised they had heard over the shouting. She knocked again.

After a small eternity in the cold, and Sakura knocking twice more, the door opened to reveal who could only be Naruto.

Wow, she thought, mind curiously blank of all other thought. The only other time she had seen someone to compare him to was the dark-haired stalker in the mall. He's… really…

The god-like face of the man broke into a cheek-splitting smile. "Hinata! You came! Come in, come in."

"Thanks," Hinata said, pulling a gaping Sakura in after her. "Sorry to just barge in like this, I just wanted to see how Sasuke was doing… Oh, um, this is Sakura by the way. Naruto, Sakura. Sakura, Naruto."

At the mention of her name, Sakura managed to compose herself and smile at Naruto blithely. "Hi, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too," Naruto said, shaking her hand. "Well, I'll let him know you're here, and see if he's up for visitors. I'll be right back, make yourselves comfortable."

They remained standing in the hallway, and Sakura spent her time coveting the vases and betting on the chances that the screaming match had popped stitches. She had a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach, like she was forgetting something important. She didn't think she had left her stove on, she hadn't cooked today, and her keys were in her pocket. She shook her head, and shrugged it off. Probably nothing.

Hinata adjusted the bear in her arms a few times, but was otherwise silent and unmoving throughout the short wait. She seemed anxious.

Naruto reappeared quickly, pouting. "He said he would like to see you," he muttered. He perked up though, at the sight of the stuffed bear trying to crush Hinata. "That for him?"

"Yes," Hinata faltered. "You mentioned he would like one…"

Naruto cackled evilly. "Oh, definitely. This way."

Sakura frowned at Naruto's (broad, rippling with wonderful muscle) back as he led them across the plush carpet to a back bedroom. There was something almost… off about him. Something she couldn't quite put her finger on, like the air was thicker around him, or hazy. She had these feelings sometimes. Usually, it came in the form of instant like or dislike of someone without probable cause, but always those she disliked tended to do things she disapproved of. Like the woman that sold morphine from her drip, or the cop that was actually a serial murderer.

Naruto wasn't like that. She liked him, but she was also…

Scared? No, that's not it. But there's definitely something… like he could make me fear him, if he wanted to.

Now there was a disturbing thought. She had gotten that feeling around Neji too, though not this strong, and he had put her cornered in a verbal battle in less than a minute. If Naruto was more dangerous… and dating Hinata…

Know this, Sakura thought, watching as he laughed at one of Hinata's quiet comments. I know ways to kill you that would make it look like an accident, and I know ways that would make it seem like you had done it yourself. You cross the line, you will discover the business end of a potassium-filled syringe.

They came to the end of the hallway, and as Naruto opened the door and ushered Hinata in with a smile, he caught Sakura's gaze, challenge in his eyes. Bring it, that look said, and Sakura smiled at him.

"Here's the deal. I'm going to start the Best Friend warning speech, so prepare yourself. You hurt her—"

"I think I got it," he interrupted. "I hurt her, you kill me. Don't worry, I really like her. Come on, let's be friends."

And if I'm not your friend? Sakura thought, but didn't let it show on her face. "Friends," she laughed. "Sorry, she just screams helpless-protect-me! Bless her heart."

Naruto laughed. "She does, huh? Come on, I'll bet Sasuke would like to see you too."

The feeling like she had forgotten something came back in full force. Sasuke, Sasuke, why does that name sound so familiar?

She came into the room—blue walls, smooth, polished oak furniture, and floor to ceiling windows to let in the view of a perfectly manicured garden out back—but her eyes were drawn immediately to the resting deity reclining on white Egyptian cotton, eyeing the teddy bear askance, but giving Hinata a warm smile.

Figures, Sakura thought, as the guy she had threatened to rip his genitals out through his ears turned his clear black eyes on her.

oOo

Author's Notes: At which point Sasuke grew fangs, giant wings, and ripped Sakura's head off with his taloned hands. And so Sakura realized that, gosh, threatening hot strangers really isn't the best policy.

Please, tell me what you think! Next chapter is Sasuke's POV.