Disclaimer: You ask a stupid question...

oOo

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow

oOo

Gaara nodded politely to Chiyo and helped her creaking bones down from the podium before taking her place. There was barely a dry eye among the sea of mourners after Chiyo's speech.

Gaara's eyes were dry—eyes holding only a thin wisp of silent, personal grief beneath a veneer of disconsolate guilt. Kankuro—for the first time in his life not wearing eyeliner—was on the first row and sobbing dejectedly as Temari's casket was closed. Shikamaru Nara sat beside him, shoulders and head bowed in open misery and smelling strongly of alcohol. Temari would be so disappointed to see how her death had affected them.

"God," Gaara began, voice strong. "Knows the time for all things, the season in which all things must happen. Temari was his daughter, she fulfilled her purpose in His plan, and hers was a brave death to protect the ones she loved. She was my sister, my mother, my friend," he paused, feeling the stirrings of sadness threatening to make him into a blubbering idiot. He repressed them as best he could. "My confidant. And all who knew her can attest to her being a woman of uncompromising intelligence, wit, and enduring compassion. She was, and will forever be, the angel that guides my life. God receives her into His hand with joy, and so with joy we say goodbye as she returns to Him."

He stepped down from the podium to more sobbing, and Temari's casket was carried out by the bearers. The attendees followed, Kankuro moving slowly to join them, but Shikamaru remained unmoving on the bench, staring down at his broken hand.

Gaara motioned Kankuro on, and stood in front of Shikamaru, head cocked to the side and staring.

"Are you coming?" Gaara asked.

"I—" Shikamaru took a shaky breath. "I canshn't."

"Is that because you're so drunk you can't move?"

"No."

Gaara remained silently in front of him for several more seconds, before lifting Shikamaru's head by the hair and slapping him soundly across the face. A red handprint bloomed in perfect definition along the other man's jaw line, and hazy brown eyes widened in shock.

"That is what she would have done if she could see you," Gaara explained, letting go of Shikamaru's greasy head and wiping his hands. "I will not be stepping into her shoes again. She lived a long life, a good life, and her death was her choice and a great deal her fault. You are partially to blame," Gaara continued. "You're too smart not to know that. But you should also know the ultimate blame, and the most blame, lies with a man you have dealt with. Now, come."

"Thank you," Shikamaru said, managing to sound mostly sober. Gaara had to help him from the church to the graveyard, and they stayed beneath the clear blue Texan sky until everyone else had long since left, staring at the insufficient stone reminder of a woman far beyond the words—Temari Subaku: Loving Sister, Perfect Wife, One Woman Army.

oOo

Three Months Later—Late June.

Hinata stared out through the screen at the near-empty, trash-strewn street and tried to catch a cool breeze. The customary haze of cigarette smoke lent the buildings a yellow coat of slime, baked on by the unyielding sun above. She wore a coat of sweat, and desperately took a long drink from her lukewarm water bottle, wishing the ice chilling in the freezer would harden just a little faster. It was three o' clock in the afternoon, and most everyone had retreated indoors except a woman in a blue wig tugging along a gasping poodle and a homeless man in a ratty jacket that was giggling to himself. The rest of the street was almost eerie in its abandonment, an aluminum Cola can rolling down the street seemed like thunder.

"It's so hot," Tenten moaned, fanning herself slowly with a bit of folded newspaper from the deeper shadows within the house. "Why did I want to come here?"

"I don't know anymore," Hinata moaned, peeling her face from the screen with the decision that the breeze fairy wasn't granting any wishes soon. She missed New York. New York was never this hot, she was sure, and it snowed there all the time… "Let's go to Siberia next."

"Uhn," Tenten agreed.

There were several moments of silence while Hinata stretched out on the floor and stared dully up at the whizzing ceiling fan. The fan was a joke—all it did was move hot air around.

Closing her eyes, Hinata counted sheep in a vain attempt to go to sleep. If only it weren't so very hot, she could doze off and wake when it was cooler…

There was a ringing clang from outside, and then the door slammed as Shino came stomping back inside and dropped his wrench on the floor. Sweat stained his clothes, and Hinata wished for the thousandth time that he would take her advice and lose the long sleeves and hood in the middle of summer.

"I am a researcher," he announced quietly. "I know nothing of air conditioning units. I… have failed you."

"Oh. No, Shino!" Hinata assured him. "You're fine! It's fine!"

At the same time Tenten snapped: "Why did you volunteer if you know nothing? Get out of my way. I'll fix it."

Grumbling under her breath, Tenten snatched up the wrench and strode outside muttering about incompetent people under her breath. Hinata smiled weakly at Shino, and patted the floor next to her. "Come on, sit down. Take a load off."

Shino sat; shoulders hunched after Tenten's sharp comment, and tried not to look as pitiful as he felt. He failed horribly; projecting an air of kicked-puppy-dog the likes of which Hinata had not seen since Naruto had broken that vase at—

Well. Since.

"She didn't mean it," Hinata assured him, patting Shino's arm. "She just gets upset some times, you know? It's the heat. It messes with her head a little. She also has, um, allergies! Yes, bad allergies, and all this smoke is making her a little fussy. That's all, Shino. Really. Don't let a harsh word get you down!"

"Okay," Shino muttered, and hunched a little more.

Right, Hinata thought, sighing silently, okay. She had known Shino in high school—they had even been close for the last two years of that torture session—but Shino had always been more reserved, quieter, than others and when his parents moved to France they had mostly lost contact. An email here, a call there, certainly nothing she had thought lasting enough that when they had first landed in France, three long months ago now, that he would be willing to take in the two waifs that had called and begged for locations on a cheap motel. Despite that, Shino came to pick them up from the airport, drive them home, brushed off Tenten's casual suggestion of him being a complete psychopath, and let them stay in his tiny, cheap apartment.

Hinata had referred to it as "quaint" and "practical". Tenten hadn't referred to it as anything at all, and when she learned he was studying bugs—keeping them in the apartment—her lips only disappeared for a brief moment.

"Do you miss New York?"

"Mm?" Hinata asked, shaking herself out of her daze.

"Do you miss New York?" Shino repeated, in that voice of his pitched just above a whisper. Apparently, loud noises disturbed the bugs.

Hinata thought about it for a moment, staring at the frantically spinning fan. "Yes," she admitted finally. "It's nice here, of course, I like it. But I miss home. I miss my family and friends there, my house, my job, the cold…"

"Your boyfriend?"

Hinata closed her eyes and saw Naruto's face, grin dimpling into one tan cheek and eyes sparkling with mischief. "Yes. I miss him very much."

"Oh," Shino muttered. Hinata kept her eyes closed so she didn't have to catch the flash of disappointment on his face.

With a sudden hum, cool air flooded the house, and Hinata screeched in joy. "Tenten, you genius!"

"I hit it," Tenten said happily, coming back inside and shutting the door against the heat. "Repeatedly. I guess something was loose and I jiggled it back into place."

"Good work," Shino offered.

"Thanks. Um, sorry about being a jerk…"

"I'll blame the allergies."

Tenten stared at him blankly, looked to Hinata—who did her best to shrug innocently—and finally just settled for flopping down on the floor and soaking in the wonders of modern day climate control.

They were all quiet for several long moments, just soaking in the cooler air and murmuring in delight.

"Oh, we're moving, pack up," Tenten announced casually.

"Moving…?" Hinata demanded, sitting up. "Why?"

"I've killed five demons all looking for you. Today, I kill one right outside which means they know where we are now. And I may have killed it, but I don't know it didn't pass the information on. I'll ward Shino before we leave, and once they know we're not here they'll leave him alone."

"I—I didn't k—know," Hinata stuttered. "Um…"

"That's all right Tenten," Shino said. "I was moving back to my family's chateau soon anyway."

Both girls were silent for a moment, until Tenten ventured: "You have a chateau?"

"Of course."

"Then why do you live here?"

"An experiment," Shino said, as if it was obvious.

Hinata resisted the urge to roll her eyes, and got up to find her bag. If they were going to leave, they might as well do it now. Before someone else came—someone else that looked harmless but blew up doors.

Tenten followed her into the extra bedroom Shino had given them and leaned against the wall. The bedroom was cramped, barely large enough for their two suitcases and futons, and Hinata had to maneuver carefully to avoid stepping on miscellaneous bits of Tenten's stuff left out over the floor and bed.

"The next place will be more permanent," Tenten explained after she shut Pinocchio. Pinocchio was their door, and Hinata had named it in honor of the Pinocchio complex the piece of cardboard seemed to have. It always wanted to be a real door… "I've been setting it up for a couple of weeks now."

Hinata pressed her lips together and turned to face Tenten, doing her best to maintain a very serious look on her face. "Tenten, I would appreciate if you would include me in the planning. And tell me when things happen. Like the five demons hunting me down about which I knew nothing previously would have been nice to know!"

"Why?" Tenten demanded, jerking her suitcase out from the rubble. "You just would have been scared and worried. I was just trying to protect you."

"I appreciate it," Hinata said through gritted teeth. "But what I would have done was use the tools you've given me! What's the point of me learning how to handle a gun if I never use it?"

"You shouldn't have to," Tenten said firmly.

"Tenten," Hinata said, taking the same tone her father had always used when he wanted something. "Please, tell me what happened to you. Why are you doing all this for me?"

Tenten groaned and stuffed a hairbrush into her suitcase. "Because you're innocent and I don't want anything bad to happen to you that would take that away."

"What happened to you?" Hinata repeated firmly.

The sound of city life started reawakening outside their window as the hottest part of the day slipped by, and Tenten crawled over on Hinata's bed so that she could see out onto the street. Hinata turned to face her, watching, and finally Tenten nodded to herself. Still not looking at Hinata she said: "Don't make fun of me if I cry?"

"Never."

"Okay. I… I was sixteen," Tenten began, eyes distant. "I was on holiday with my parents in LA. We were staying in some cheap little motel, and I was coming back from the pool when… when he saw me." She took a deep breath, let it out slowly.

"He was beautiful," she admitted, closing her eyes for a long moment, imagining him. "Dark eyes and a cocky smile and this aura around him that sent chills down my spine… He talked to me and, like an idiot, I let him corner me behind a vending machine. I'd never been kissed before, and he was handsome, so I thought… Anyway, it was nice enough until he started touching me. I tried to push him away, but he wouldn't go, so I kneed him in the groin, punched him in the nose, and ran."

"I didn't think he would follow me," she continued. "So I went up to my room, trying to wipe the blood off my knuckles. My parents were hippies—in the worst sense, by the way. My real name is Flower of Heaven's Love. It's actually on my birth certificate. Tenten is my middle name. I got it from my mom's side of the family—"

She cut herself off with a wince, eyes snapping open. "Sorry. I ramble."

"It's okay," Hinata said quietly. Naruto had that aura too, sometimes, the same cocky smile… "It's fine."

"Right. I went back to the room and the next thing I knew I was being slammed against a wall and he bit me-" she pulled up her sleeve to show an intricate snowflake on her bicep. Looking closer, Hinata saw the snowflake was actually made from tiny, detailed swords, whips, and knives. "Leaving me with this. He left me on the floor, went into the room, and killed my parents. He didn't want them to compete for my affections. He showed me their heads…"

Hinata shuddered, patting Tenten's knee comfortingly and earning a smile.

"That's an old wound now. Then he took me away, to some big house, and we lived—I say lived. It was more like I just existed—there together for two years. He really wanted me to develop Stockholm, but I was resistant. He didn't like resistance."

Tenten idly traced a fine network of scars around her arm. Hinata hadn't even noticed them before because they were so faint, but now that she knew what to look for she could see them on Tenten's neck as well, and she would bet a lot more were hiding beneath the white T-shirt she was wearing.

"One day, he turned his back and I ran. I stole the car and drove and drove and drove as far as I could. I hadn't been around normal people in two years, my clothes were ridiculous and money? Money was a joke. But one great thing about hippie parents is that they know just about everyone, so I stayed with some of their friends. I worked, I got some cash, I bought a gun and learned how to use it, I researched, and I waited for the day he would find me again."

"It didn't help."

There was a dark look in Tenten's eyes now, and Hinata shuddered.

"He came, and no matter how many times I shot him he just got up again. He broke my arm and then nearly killed me. But I held on, and when I was better I had a plan. He took me away again, but this time I was ready. I knew what I needed to do. I got anything that could be used as a weapon—a sharp stick, a piece of broken glass, some rope, matches, gasoline, even a knife, and when he left I got ready. When he came home he had a noose around his neck, a knife in his heart, and a gallon of gasoline on his head. I set him on fire, then I chopped up the body and scattered the bones."

"Zealous," Hinata managed after a minute, and Tenten laughed.

"Yeah, not exactly a trophy to the head huh?" she giggled. "Anyway, after that I decided I was going to devote my life to killing demons. And now I'm pretty darn good at it."

"Okay," Hinata said. She wasn't honestly sure how much of Tenten's story had registered, how much anything had registered. Her mind as in a desultory fog, everything that came into it got lost and only bits and pieces found their way in. Had Tenten said she had hung the man—the thing?

"In short," Tenten said, clambering back to her bed and smushing an axe into her suitcase. "Demons are sick, I hate them, and I don't want that to happen to anyone else. We good?"

"Thank you," Hinata said, laying a hand on the woman's arm. She touched the snowflake, and Tenten flinched, but Hinata only moved her hand away and summoned a smile. "Thank you for telling me. We're good. I'm sorry I brought it up."

"You had a right to know," Tenten muttered, fussing with her fingers. She sniffed, and turned her face away, scrounging together the last of her amenities. "Let's get packing, huh? We have a long day ahead of us."

oOo

"Long day?"

Shikamaru grunted in acknowledgment, falling onto Ino's thin couch with a loud groan. Holly laughed in delight as Shika's head landed on her, and pulled on his ponytail.

"Dad!" she exclaimed. "You came! I knew you would come, no matter how late you worked. Sit up, sit up! I want you to watch this movie with me!"

It had become something of a tradition over the last two months since Shikamaru had moved back to New York for him to drop by on Friday nights and spend some time with Holly. This usually led to him also seeing her all of Saturday, a good deal of Sunday, and he even got to text her during the week. He wasn't willing to push Ino much farther than that right now. She allowed it because she knew he needed family right now, so soon after Temari, and even tried not to be grudging.

So Shikamaru used the last of his remaining energy to pull himself up into a seated position, snuggle Holly into his side, and stare blankly at some show on the T.V. about matter manipulation.

He was so exhausted he couldn't even follow the relatively simple conversation on fusion, and realized his eyes kept falling closed.

"Hey," Ino said, leaning over the back of the couch. She pressed a mug of coffee into his hand, smelling strong enough to remove tar, and he nodded his thanks. It was warm, but not hot, and he downed the entire mug in three long swallows. Holly watched in awe, taking his cup from him when he was done and trying a drop. Her face puckered instantly.

"Ugh!" she exclaimed, holding the cup away from her in disgust. "You drank that?"

"Never again," Shikamaru assured him as the taste lingered in his mouth. He almost never drank coffee—it tasted like tree bark—but he had the feeling he wouldn't have been able to get home without the extra kick.

Ino laughed and brought them both a glass of chocolate milk, settling down next to him with a groan. "What is this?"

"C-span?" Holly admitted guiltily.

Ino rolled her eyes. "Alright! How does everyone feel about Kung Fu Panda?"

Holly sighed, but agreed, and Shikamaru shrugged.

"Kung Fu Panda is one we can agree on," Holly explained as Ino set up the DVD. "It's so stupid we can just laugh and I don't have to notice the horrible inconsistencies with reality. Like Star Wars I can't watch. I mean, sound in space, really?"

"Not to mention the blatant disregard for all other possible laws of physics," Shikamaru agreed. "Now, what exactly is this movie about…?"

Two hours later Holly had finally gone to bed and Shikamaru was actually considering another draught of the horrible coffee. He was falling asleep where he sat, and he still needed to get home…

"Stay," Ino offered as she saw him trying to lever himself off the couch. "I'll grab a blanket and pillow for you. The couch might not be the most comfortable thing in the world, but it'll do for one night."

Shikamaru yawned, thinking the couch looked like the most comfortable thing in the world. "Sorry…"

"You don't have to apologize all the time you know," she said, grabbing a blanket from the closet. "I mean, I don't mind having you here or anything. Believe it or not, I've known you a while now, you're a good friend, it's really not a problem."

Shikamaru eyed her askance, toeing off his shoes. "U-huh. What do you want?"

"What makes you think I want something?"

"Well, believe it or not, I've known you for a while now. You're a good friend…"

Ino laughed and threw a pillow at his head. He let it him in the face and fall on the couch, following after it until he was stretched out. The couch was too small for him, but if he hung his feet off the end it wasn't too bad.

"Hey, before you sleep," Ino said, turning off lights. "Have you… found anything?"

Shikamaru didn't need to ask what she was talking about. She asked every time he came over. "She was in France," Shikamaru muttered. "Apparently, Neji learned this two weeks ago, but didn't tell on the basis that he thought it was a family matter."

"That snake," Ino hissed, which had become a high insult in her book. "That rat-faced, no-good, lazy sonuva—"

"He's apologized, he won't do it again," Shikamaru said. He could still remember Naruto's face, pale and disbelieving as they told him Neji had known and not said anything. Betrayal had been clearly written on Naruto's feature, and guilt on Neji's. No, it wouldn't happen again. But it had already happened once, and now they had lost her. Not only that, but Kabuto had apparently found her first, was hunting her as surely as Shikamaru hunted him.

Everything was a mess.

"That's no excuse!" Ino snapped. "Ooh! I could just… ooh!"

Shikamaru smiled without thinking about it, tugging the flowered blanket under his chin. He could remember other rants of hers like this. Silly, ridiculous rants about anything and everything under the sun—a lot of them had been about him actually...

"I'll let you sleep," Ino finally grumped. "Goodnight, Shika."

Shikamaru would have replied, but he was already fast asleep.

oOo

Author's Notes: So in apology for my long absence I have posted a longer than usual chapter (though most of it rather angsty) and hope that you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you did, review! If you didn't, review! And if you weren't going to review anyway, it is officially my BIRTHDAY (YAY! Confetti.) and I wouldn't mind that as a present. ;-)

So, basically, review!