Author's Note: Ahem. So... it's been a while... and I am very sorry for the delay! The only thing I can now promise is that I plan to have this done before June. I'm sorry that you've had to wait this long!
THANK YOU so much for the reviews!
oOo
It was after midnight, and Able street was dark. Yellow lamps burned low or were out completely, creating thick spots of darkness between the meager footpaths of light. Sasuke had to keep his eyes on his feet fifty percent of the time, as one wrong move could send him onto the gravel with a snapped ankle.
The other fifty percent of his attention was focused solely on his surroundings. A steep hill with a rotted roadway and rusted metal safety guards hemmed him on the left, and the metal industrial buildings with their watching eyes and moaning mouths, hemmed in by chain-link, clotted his left, front, and rear escape. The only way into this place was under that old bridge, where the hill had been carved away to receive incoming trucks, the roadway threatening to come crumbling down on top of it any day.
It was a kill box.
The hair on the back of his neck was standing straight up. He could hear the traffic clogging up the FDR, the wind whistling past the metal and concrete corners, and the subtle crunch of gravel beneath his feet and behind him.
"Sir," Crane whispered to his left. He had brought five of Naruto's honor guard (well, honor for them, as Naruto wasn't technically aware of their existence just yet. It was just too difficult for one person to keep track of that bouncing ball of sunshine and mania all the time) with him tonight, some of his strongest subordinates. "Should we…?"
Sasuke held up his hand. "We wait for Bear to report."
Crane nodded, and fell silent. He could almost see Tiger, Lizard, and Falcon exchange looks, and the not-so-subtle pass of coins between them.
Minutes passed. Sasuke resisted the urge to check his watch, determined not to show worry. It was taking a while though. Too long?
No, he thought, fighting too-familiar hyperventilation. Just relax. Relax.
He thought of Sakura, and it made him smile slightly. Some of his paranoia left him, and he was able to draw a normal breath.
Bear materialized out of the shadows a moment later. His shoulders were tense.
"We should go," Bear whispered, voice muffled by the mask on his face. "The distress call we received earlier was a hoax. There's nobody here, and I have a bad feeling about this place."
Sasuke nodded, controlling his own panic. He could see everything clearly now, and what he had to do. But he had to have control. He thought of Sakura smiling, chewing on the end of her pencil, slamming her fist into the sandbag—he was not going to lose it! But he could feel the madness creeping, the twisted paranoia that left him unable to tell friend from foe. He fought it for several tense seconds before he could speak. "You're right. We're going to be attacked. This is a trap."
"Then—"
"It's too late. We have seconds. They're probably carrying guns. I want you to form up behind me, as close as you can get. Don't run until I tell you."
Sasuke was sure there were protests, but he didn't hear them. He was sinking, sinking deep and fast into the locked portions of his mind. He would need more than his usual bag of tricks if anyone was going to get out of here alive tonight, and that meant delving behind the doors he had so carefully constructed to keep his nightmares at bay.
First, the madness.
The madness lay behind the first door, a door made up of new hopes and old dreams, and it was always disturbingly easy to open. The madness was always there, lurking, a darkness that bit and tore with claws he couldn't see and couldn't catch. It had come from Itachi's betrayal of the family, from Orochimaru's games, and Sasuke's own paralyzing fear. But he knew it, he could control it, and so he passed through without being mired in the mud.
The second door was smaller, tighter, edges all sealed up. This was the door made up of resolve, and it was harder to move, because what lay beyond frightened him more. Memories of the bad times—the times when he had betrayed his friends, destroyed lives, and become nothing more than a meat puppet that obeyed Orochimaru's orders with perfect and mechanical precision. Here, he found what he was looking for; the memory, the power, the old seals that called his greatest weapon.
He took it in his hands, and prepared to leave, but couldn't resist looking at the final door—he never could.
He was glad that was one he didn't have to open. The third door was made of blood, and pain, and bitter salt. Around the edges leaked sunshine, so bright it hurt his eyes to look. He knew what lay beyond that door, as well as he knew the symbol of his family, carved across his back and shoulders with a knife meant to burn. Beyond that lay the happy memories, the memories that touched him with gentle hands, and familiar smiles. Too much, too much.
He didn't need it now anyway.
Sasuke surfaced from his sleeping mind seconds after he had entered, eyes dripping red and patterned black. He could see the bullets coming now, the slow spin of the .42 calibers splitting the air frame by frame, could see the men in the warehouse windows with their sights trained on him.
A part of him was still terrified. Not of the bullets, but what of using the weapon would do to his mind. The other part, more prevalent, was exhilarated.
He found himself smiling.
"Tsuskuyomi."
oOo
The clock flashed 3:01 AM when the phone call came, rattling Neji out of a sound sleep. He answered the phone slightly more curtly than usual.
"What?"
"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Hinata asked with too much cheer.
Neji sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes with a groan, slashing his hair back from his face in a sharp motion. The bedroom was dark, the only glow came from the streetlights outside, muffled by thick curtains rippled in shades of blue. His bedroom was austere, composed of essential furniture that left the space open—"negative space" was what Hinata had called it when she had designed the room. There were a few pieces of art on the walls, his favorites from his personal collection. It calmed him, and he took a full breath before speaking again.
"What can I do for you, cousin?" he asked. His bedroom door opened, and he motioned Tenten into the room. She was wearing only a long shirt, and Neji made no small notice of his appreciation of her legs until she climbed under his covers—without permission—and hid them from view. He realized Hinata was still talking. "What was that, Hinata? I was distracted."
"I'm sorry it's so late," Hinata said again, while Tenten grinned at him. You think I'm pretty… He raised an eyebrow in reply. And? "Or, early, I guess. But Naruto and I need your help."
"With…?"
"We have decided to end Kabuto's bid for power in any way possible," Hinata said. "We want you and Tenten to evacuate any of our kin that are unwilling to fight. And I would really appreciate it if you could—if you could get dad and Hanabi out? I don't know how long this will take, or if they'll even target them, but I don't want to take the chance."
"What are you asking, exactly?" Neji said around the lump in his throat.
"Take everyone and run. Keep them safe until we can make sure it's safe for you to come back."
"No," Neji rebutted swiftly. He felt Tenten's hand on his shoulder, and seized it in an iron grip.
"What?" she mouthed.
Neji shook his head. "No, Hinata. You need me here. I'm not just going to run and hide while you fight."
"Me neither!" Tenten said into the phone, officially in his personal space. "I know I don't have super eyes or massive biceps-" Neji raised an eyebrow, she swatted his head—"but the bazooka can be locked and loaded in no time at all. You just give the word."
"We'll need you both on this," Hinata said calmly. "Tenten knows how to run, Neji, you just follow her lead. I need you to round everyone up by tomorrow evening. Leave anything unessential behind, it shouldn't take too long."
"Aren't you listening to me?" Neji snapped. "I'm not going!"
"Yes, you are."
"What makes you so sure?"
"Because it's what needs to be done, and because you're smart enough to see that. Also, you can make Tenten go when she wouldn't, and despite what she says she'll be hurt if she stays."
"Hey!" Tenten protested. "I'm right here."
"Neji?"
Cold logic told him the truth. He understood the necessity of the assignment, even the value and honor within, but he had just found his cousin, and there was no way he was leaving her alone again. "No, Hinata, I won't."
"I was hoping you wouldn't say that," Hinata muttered, and he could just see the wrinkle in her nose. "Neji…" she took a deep breath, he heard the rustle of static ion his ear. "Neji, this is an Order."
"Hinata, no—"
"You will evacuate anyone who is too weak or willing to go by tomorrow. You will take them to a safe location and wait there until we say it's safe to return. You will take Tenten with you."
Neji opened his mouth to say no again, but found that his tongue wouldn't form the words. A mechanical, heavy thing dropped from his mouth against his will, leaving a sour taste. "Yes."
Hinata was only silent for a moment, and her voice was soft as raw parchment when she spoke. "I'm sorry. Bye."
Neji put down the phone, and his body turned to Tenten with every semblance of calm. "We can start in the surrounding area. I'm sure Uchiha has a map labeling location and density, so we'll need to call him first. What would be an acceptable safe-house? We could—" split everyone up. No, she said to keep them together. I have to protect them in one body. "—start now."
Tenten's eyes were dark in the muted light of the bedroom, her hair falling around her face in a hazy shadow. He liked her hair down, aesthetically speaking. It softened her stern features, smoothing the creases and cares of time. He dragged his fingers through the ends without thought, taking care to gauge her reaction.
She just looked at him, her silence a thick layer between them made up of more than just that moment. There were years there, years she was carefully locking away. Neji could understand that very well.
"It's against your will," she whispered. "Those Orders of theirs. You don't have a choice but to obey."
I don't want a choice, Neji thought, and that scared him. I want to do what they say. They're my pivots.
But that would not help here. He thought round for something to say, but his mind was focused only on the Orders he had received, and it was unwilling to wander.
She threaded her fingers through his, and stared hard at their hands. Were his eyes once so lost as hers? Maybe so.
"I've found purpose with them," Neji explained. "The changes, the Orders, the half-looks and whispered words, they don't matter to me. They never have. My world revolves around them, Tenten, in ways I could never hope to explain. I want to—"
"If you wanted to do it, they wouldn't have had to Order you," Tenten cut in, voice harsh.
Neji shook his head. "My cousin understands me better than I do sometimes. I want to stay because I want to control what's happening—it's… selfish. Logic has already told me this is what needs to be done."
Tenten's lips pressed into a thin line, and she climbed off the bed. "If you do this, you do it alone. I'm not going."
"I need your help," Neji said, the words coming without being bidden. He nearly choked. They were the words that would make her come, as his Orders demanded, but they made him almost ill. "Please, Tenten."
Tenten looked away from him, closed her eyes. "Give me the phone."
oOo
"Are you okay?" Naruto asked.
Hinata set aside the phone and laced her fingers together under her chin. She did not take her eyes off the computer screen. "Absolutely."
"Because I know that Ordering people can leave you feeling pretty scummy, especially if its someone close to you that you love. Like… a cousin. And I'm not saying that you're feeling scummy or that you should, just that you might feel like gum on the ground. Or maybe like overcooked ramen noodles, when they get really mushy and you kind of just push them into this little mush mountain that's all yellow and gross looking and has little chunks that aren't quite mush but aren't not mush either… Maybe."
"It's what needed to be done," Hinata said, but she looked away from his eyes. Outside the window of Naruto's home study, rain fell in a fine mist, giving the street a distinctly eerie cast. The lights in the other homes were dark, cars carefully tucked away into their shelters for the night. It was late—early?—and she had been awake for much too long. She should have called it a night hours ago, but hadn't been able to tear herself away from the screen. They needed to try and figure out Kabuto's plans now so they could plan an attack, and sleep was lagging in last place on her list of priorities.
A shadow shifted across the street, and she blinked, rubbed her eyes. Was that a stray dog, or something else?
Naruto rested a hand on her shoulder, and Hinata turned back around to the room. The study was… eclectic. Objects of various size, shape, and color had been haphazardly stacked and tucked into shelves, papers scattered across the broad desk pushed against the wall. He had brought in another chair to sit in, and with the addition the room had become slightly cramped. Or, cozy, maybe. The carpet was plush under her feet, and she had no doubt Naruto had chosen it because he knew he would spend more time on the floor than at his desk.
"I think you should get some sleep," Naruto said.
"I'm fine," Hinata replied, wondering how long she had been lost in thought. "We need to figure out this thing with Kabuto, and Neji…"
"Yeah…" Naruto rubbed the bridge of his nose awkwardly. "I think you should hear something."
"I'm a little busy right now," Hinata said quietly. The screen showed her the current concentration of Kabuto's forces, and she winced at the amount of red that signified his numbers. He held a full half of the city, but was concentrated in Queens. What had Naruto been doing in her absence?
"Please just listen?"
There was a tremor through the bond, and she sighed, turning to face him. "Alright."
He beamed at her, darting forward to kiss her nose and pulling back before she could react. "June," he began. "Some year before now. I was tracking Sasuke across the Midwest, just after his finding-himself phase. I found him in Motel 8 right off the I-40 in Oklahoma City. I had just beaten the last King, and taken up the mantle, but didn't feel right about any other second in command than Sasuke. I came to bring him back, at any cost."
Hinata could almost see the scene in her mind, a hazy memory that was not her own. She could see the yellow lights of the street lamps parting the cheap curtains and patterning the floral bedspread; the tiny side table; the door of the bathroom standing open, but swallowed in shadow. Sasuke, back pale and crossed with scars, leaning against the bathroom sink, head hung.
"Sasuke!" Naruto said, shutting the door behind him. It bounced back open, leaving him framed in a halo of light. "Sasuke!"
"Just go," Sasuke said, and his voice was very quiet.
"Sasuke, I've been looking everywhere for you! Where have you been? I mean, I know where you've been, but—"
Naruto kept talking, wishing he could stop. This was one thing he hated about himself. Whenever he got nervous, he just started talking and couldn't stop. Why couldn't he just stop?
"—and then the Dairy Queen manager came and kicked me out, but I still had the receipt, right? So I just took that and ran and—"
"Why are you here?" Sasuke snapped, spinning around. Naruto took an involuntary step back at the look in Sasuke's eyes. Pale, bruised, the thin veneer of pride and arrogance cracked, opening onto something long, hollow, and dark that he had never wanted to see.
I could make it stop, Naruto thought. I could make it all stop.
It would be easy. All he had to do was Order Sasuke to be his old self again, come back with him, be happy, and everything would be fine again. He could even Order Sasuke to forget about the past, and they could continue on as before. It was probably for the best. Sasuke was so scarred, so broken, and the fight in New York hadn't healed them as Naruto had thought it would. He had figured that the two of them teaming up to bring down Orochimaru would bring Sasuke back to him, but the second Naruto had turned around Sasuke had bolted.
Bolted. Just like that.
And he was starting to get a feeling why, a feeling that made him cold. Because that dark thing in Sasuke's eyes was fear—fear of him. Fear of Naruto being everything Orochimaru had been, Ordering the city to his own whims, bending Sasuke to someone else's will all over again.
And Naruto realized he couldn't do it. This stupid system—this stupid, stupid system—had broken them all. Sometimes he couldn't help Ordering, he couldn't, but he wouldn't be like Orochimaru either. He wouldn't use this to serve himself, no matter what.
Sasuke was still watching him. Naruto swallowed hard, trying to find words. What, now that he actually wanted to talk, he couldn't?
Come on, say something, say something!
"You'll miss the hotdogs," he blurted out.
Sasuke blinked at him, clearly taken aback. But Naruto was on roll, and there was no use going back now.
"You love those hot dogs, even though you say they're beneath you. And you love the park and the libraries and all those weird things they've found to do with tomatoes. You'll miss that right? You'll miss me?"
Sasuke didn't say anything.
"I'm not," Naruto took a deep breath, but his voice still cracked a little. "I'm not here to force you back. I won't. I'm not gonna… I'm not gonna Order you. Never again. I just wanted to ask you to—to come back home? For the… hot dogs…"
"Naruto," Sasuke sighed. "You can't promise me that. You will Order me at some time, some day. It's inevitable."
"I do promise you! And I never go back on my promises! Believe it!"
"Oh, merciful gods above," Sasuke muttered. Was that a smile tugging at his face? It was! "What are you, twelve?"
"Sasuke," Naruto said, taking a step forward. "You're my brother. I can't do this without you."
Sasuke shook his head, looking away. Naruto was about to say something else—anything else—when Sasuke suddenly laughed. "You really couldn't. I bet you don't even know how many lives you have left."
"Six?"
"Eight. What's your SSN?"
"What's an SSN?"
"You're helpless," Sasuke said. "And hopeless."
"Am not!"
"Are too."
"Am not!"
"Are too!"
"AM NOT!"
"ARE TOO!"
"Argh! I don't want to argue with you!"
"Then Order me to stop!"
"No!"
There was a moment of silence, perfectly still, and then Sasuke picked up his bag and pushed past Naruto to the door.
"Sasuke, wait—"
"Did you bring the truck?"
"Did I… what?"
"The truck. I rode my motorcycle the whole way, and it'll be easier to transport with the truck."
Naruto was more than slightly confused. "Wait so… you're-you're coming back?"
"Well," Sasuke's smile was shockingly bright. "I would miss the hot dogs."
Hinata blinked, and it was Naruto's dazed face before her. Her mind felt light and swirly, like a balloon spinning in the air. She put a hand to her head slowly, leaning back in her seat.
"Did not know that was going to happen," Naruto said. "Whoa."
"Yeah. Whoa."
"Anyway," Naruto shook his head, blinked. "Um, moral of the story is that Ordering is, uh, bad for relationships."
"I see your point," Hinata admitted quietly. "But it's just… it's so easy. I didn't even have to think about it."
Naruto shrugged. "It's always easy. Always. I've slipped more times than I can count."
Hinata sighed, nodded, and picked up the phone. She hit the re-dial button as Naruto shot her a thumbs-up and stood up to an impromptu cheer.
"Hello?"
"Neji? It's Hinata."
"How may I help you?"
She winced at the plastic tone of his voice. "I wanted to apologize. I shouldn't have Ordered you, and you shouldn't do it if you don't want to. I would still appreciate it, but I am sorry for the way I handled it."
Neji was silent for a long time. The minutes dragged on for so long that Hinata checked to make sure the call hadn't been cancelled.
Finally, he said. "I see."
Naruto motioned for her to continue, and she shrugged helplessly. She had always been terrible at apologies, too horrified by her own actions to know the words to say. And she always cried. She hated crying.
Hinata shoved the phone Naruto's way.
"No, no, no! Hi! Yeah, it's me," Naruto said, frowning at her. "Uh… how's it going?"
Hinata face-palmed.
"Hey, doing my best here," Naruto said. "Huh? Oh, no, Hinata is disappointed in how I'm handling her problem. Ow! Okay, I'm sorry, that was mean. No, Neji, not you! I mean, I guess you too, but it's really Hinata that wants to say this. Well, hey, she would have stayed on the line if you hadn't been such a jerk about it. You could have just forgiven her. Oh. Well… yeah. Neji… you're the best! Yeah, I know. Okay. Okay. Bye."
"What'd he say?" Hinata asked, leaning forward.
"He's over it," Naruto shrugged. "He's going to evacuate everyone and he loves you."
Hinata's expression was skeptical at best. "Really?"
"You have him wrapped around your little finger," Naruto said, and kissed her pinky. "Trapped in your perfect hand."
Hinata blushed and leaned into his shoulder, relaxing in the familiar smell of Dove soap and ramen. Naruto put his face in her hair and sighed with contentment. He brushed her bangs from her eyes, and then leaned in for a kiss.
It was the kind of kiss she had missed from him. The heat pulling like a bowstring through her blood, fizzing her bones; the slow, hot pool that formed in her belly and made her head spin. It was the kind of perfect kiss she had always read about in books but never really believed. It was the kind of kiss that said: "You're safe here."
It came as no surprise that they were interrupted.
Naruto actually growled as he ripped his phone out of his pocket, and Hinata giggled into his neck, kissing his pulse point, which jumped.
"Yeah?" Naruto managed.
Hinata was close enough to listen in to the call this time. The voice sounded suspiciously like… Shino. Shino, that weird guy she had hidden out with in Paris! That little snake! He must have been keeping tabs on her the whole time. "Naruto. I have located Nara and the others. There has been a minor altercation on the east side, and four of ours were wounded. They walked into a trap, lucky any made it out, let alone all alive. I'll keep you posted."
"Shino—"
"Give me that phone," Hinata ordered, wrenching it from his hand. "Shino?!"
If Shino was ruffled, his voice did little to admit the fact. "Hello, Hinata. It is good to hear from you. I was worried after you had to run away again."
"You were—Shino! You were spying on me!"
"I can see how you might think that," Shino said. "But I was on vacation."
Hinata was thoroughly taken aback. Was the world so regimented in Shino's mind that simply the idea that he was on vacation had alleviated all responsibility he felt to Naruto? It seemed impossible.
But, then, a lot of things about Shino seemed impossible.
"I also thought of you as a friend," Shino added, sounding hurt.
Hinata softened. "I'm sorry, Shino. I was just surprised. How are you?"
"Hinata…" Naruto whined softly in her ear. "Kissing…"
"Shh!" Hinata hissed. Was her face actually burning? "I'm sorry, Shino. Naruto is demanding my attention right now. Do you think we could get together for lunch soon and catch up?"
"That would be nice," Shino agreed softly. "Good-bye, Hinata."
"Bye," Hinata squeaked. Naruto was planting soft kisses up her neck, and it was horribly distracting.
He grinned at her, not in the least bit repentant. "Kissing now?"
She rolled her eyes, knowing it was ruined by her smile.
oOo
Author's Notes: Please review!