Okay, I got a few complaints about how shallow the emotions of my characters have been, and now that I look back again, I do realize that they were. So, I did as much as I could with this chapter. I hope it's a little better. And untill I add some stuff into all of my other chapters, I won't be doing another update, sorry, but i think it's necessary to do it.

Hellooo? : Bella

Since Jacob had been banned from seeing me until his grades were up, I was plain scared. I had been getting better since I had been hanging out with him on a daily basis. But what would happen when I couldn't see him? Would I be worse off than before? Now that I had begun to remember what living was like, and having now had a taste of being happy again, would the nightmares and things get worse?

The days passed slowly, and surely enough, I was going downhill. The nightmares were steadily coming back, and becoming more and more intense as the week crept onwards. EVery night i woke up screaming, as I had been before. And the first night, Charlie rushed into my room because I had not had a nightmare in a couple months now. After I told him that it was just a dream, he stood there for a few seconds, and walked back to his room down the hall. After that, Charlie didn't even bother getting out of bed, because he knew what was wrong.

I was sitting at the table eating some cereal when an idea hit me. Duh! I didn't know why I didn't think of it earlier. We didn't always have to hang out in the garage. We could alternate between watching hanging out in La Push and hanging out at my house.

I rused to the phone to tell Billy about my plan, and he reluctantly agreed, but he had agreed nonetheless. Jacob wasn't able to hang out untill the weeked, and tomorrow was friday, though. But even just knowing that I would be able to see my best friend tomorrow was enough to keep me from falling deeper into this pit of despair that had been waiting to swallow me up.

Even though I had only been withought Jacob for a week, it had been long enough to assure me that I needed Jacob in order to keep healing. It sounded selfish, I know, but that wasn't the only reason I kept him around. He was my best friend.

Some of my friends at school had gladly taken me back from when I was in my zombie-like state. I still had Angela, who was always there as a comforting reassurance, her boyfriend Ben, who pretty much is into whatever Angela was into, Mike, who I had a feeling wouldn't care either way, and Jessica some of the time. When Lauren wasn't busy gossiping with Jessica, we would talk. But only when Lauren wasn't around. See, Lauren and I did not like each other at all, and I just did my best to avoid her. Jessica was still a little mad at me for pretty much igonoring her and being a total anti-social for four whole months, but she was pretty easy to be friends with. As long as you knew where to nod and what not when she was jabbering, you wouldn't really have to talk much at all.

It was a Friday night and I was doing my usual four to eleven shift at the Newton s family owned store, when I got a call on my cell. What do you know, it s Jacob!

"Hello?" I answered kind of quietly. Mrs. Newton had never said anything about talking on a phone while working, but I was pretty sure that she wouldn't be too happy about finding me on the phone while I was supposed to be working.

"Bella? Hey what are you up to?" Jacob sounded really happy, happier than normal.

"Uh, Jacob, I told you I have to work tonight till eleven." I hadn't meant to sound so rude, I just wanted to hurry up and get off the phone before somebody saw me.

"Yeah, I know." It was obvious that my sudden hostility hadn't fazed him one bit. Jacob just never gives up, does he?

"Alright, well will you go ahead and say what you need to say? I m not trying to be rude, but I don t want to be caught talking on the phone when Mrs. Newton comes back from her break." Wow, that did sound a lot meaner than was intended.

"Fine then, be that way. Hey do you want to go to the movies tonight? There's this awesome zombie movie out in theaters. It starts at eleven thirty, wanna ask Charlie if you can go? Or do you want me to call and ask him?"

Oh gosh. Movies. That s never good. Even with scary movies, there's always at least one couple in love and what not. I guess I could try. But it is a zombie movie, and Jacob isn't the type to watch romance. You know what? I think I ll go. Charlie was right, I hardly every go anywhere anymore (besides Jacob s house, that is.)

Yeah, that sounds good. I just hope it will turn out good.

"Alright, then. It s a date." It was weird, but Jake sounded both all too wrong and all too right saying that statement. Then the line went dead. I closed my phone and stuck it in my pocket just as I heard Mrs. Newton walk in the door.

"How ya doin there, Bella? Holdin down the fort?? Mrs. Newton was a nice lady, her son, Mike, was too, but he was just a little pushy, and overfriendly. But they were a generally nice family.

"Yep, everything's just fine here. Where's Mike, I thought he went on break with you?" I could have sworn I saw them go out of the store and get in the car together. Hmmm .

"Oh he did, but he started feeling real sick, so I decided I'd let him go him. He was getting sick to his stomach, and he was all clammy. He didn't look too good. Say, I'm probably going to get out of here in about, oh I don't know a half our? Would you mind closin up for me? I know you ve only been here for an hour, but I ll still pay you for the whole shift?"

"Uh, no. I wouldn t mind one bit Mrs. Newton. Go take care of Mike. OH, and could you tell him I said to get better soon?" Mike could be in a pain in the rear sometimes, but I still hated to see him like this.

"I sure will, honey, and thanks again, you ve been such a help ever since we hired you."

"Oh, it's no problem," I said. And it really wasn't. The earlier I got off the more time I got to spend with Jake.

As soon as she walked out the door I headed to the back to get the keys and lock up shop for the night. I just felt kind of bad for getting seven hours worth of pay when I only worked for one. As I was walking back to the keys, I was pulling my phone out of my pocket to call Jacob and tell him that I was going to be a couple hours early. But as I was dialing the number, I could have sworn I heard a little woosh and saw a flash of red hair.

"Hello?" No answer. "Helloo?" I asked a little bit louder. "Anyone there?" Hmm, guess not. A shiver ran down my spine. It was probably just that I was all alone in the shop, and I was getting paranoid. But the shade of red that I saw reminded me of something, but I couldn t quite place it. Victoria. The...Cullens had told me that since she had lost her mate, James, she would be after me. How could I have forgotten about her? If she really wanted you that bad, she would have already done something....Right? And they wouldn't have just left me here all by myself if there was still a threat like Victoria? Would they? Just call Jacob, tell him you're on your way, lock up the shop, and leave. But still, I couldn't help but think about her. Stop it, Bella. You're just freaking yourself out.

I quickly changed subjects in my mind. It was all to painful to think about The Cullens. Or anything to do with them for that matter.

So I took a few calming breaths and called Jacob, and he said it would be fine and that he would just look to see what times the movie came on to see if there was a show we could catch.

So when I turned off the lights, I pretty much ran to the door, set the alarm, and I was out of there.

When I got to Jacob s house, he was looking even happier than usual. Huh, I wonder what's with him.

This is it. Today is the day: Jacob

This is it. Today is the day. Today is the day when I am going to tell Bella how much I'm in love with her. But when? I know I need to wait for the perfect moment and all that, but I didn't want to wait and wait and wait, and then the night be over before I knew it. You're kidding yourself, Jacob. She's not ready for this. No, no, no, this wasn't a good idea. If you tell her you're just going to scare her away, and that would be even worse than having not told her. But, it was torture not having her know how I feel about her. I was in love with her, I couldn't deny it. I wanted to help her. I wanted to be the one who picked up the pieces of her broken heart, and put them back together. I wanted to hold her and kiss her and love her. I wanted to be with this girl for the rest of my life.

What to do, what to do.

Either way, I was feeling a little weird about today. Sort of like I was about to get sick, but also like something was going to happen today. Uh-oh. That cant be good, because normally my bad feelings are right.

I heard Bella's truck coming from at least a mile away. It was wierd, I had been hearing even the slightest things lately. Whatever, I told myself, you're probably just now noticing these sort of things. So I decided I would go to the door and wait for her. The anticipation of what I was going to say to her was just too much to bear. I was getting all nervous, which was something that almost never happened to me, and while I was standing there, Billy rolled up in his wheelchair and just stood there looking at me funny. Since I was all worked up about today being "the day" and all that, it really annoyed me. He was looking at me sort of like he was expecting me to do something irrational.

"What are you staring at?" I asked him, you could easily hear the irritation in my voice.

"Nothing son. Chill out," he said while putting his hands up defensively

Grumpy old man. Something s wrong with him. What? I don t know, but something was up.

Before I knew it, Bella was pulling into the driveway and clumsily making her way out of her truck and up the driveway.

"Heey, Bella! How was work ?" I asked while pulling her into a bear hug.

"Can't--- Breathe-- !" She said while trying to breathe.

"Sorry, must not know my own strength." It was true. I didn t mean to hug her that hard. And it didn t seem like I was hugging her that hard. But then again, she was a small and fragile girl. I would have to be careful from now on. I didn't want to break a rib or anything. Jeez. But I also couldn't help myself. Every time I saw her beautiful face, and the soft ringlets of her mahogany hair, I just wanted to hold her and never let go.

"Yeah, obviously," she replied with a smirk on her pretty little face. "You're a little bit peppier than usual. What's up?" Oops. She had obviously noticed something was up. I would have to be more careful about exactly how much emotion I convey to her.

"Uh, nothing. What do you mean? I don't feel any different. Well, I sort of do, but not in--I'm just gonna shut up now, hahah" Come on, Jake.

"Hahaha yeah, you do that," she joked.

So we went to see the movie at 5:45 instead of eleven thirty, and the movie was awesome, by the way. But towards the end of the movie, I started feeling queasy. And it wasn't because of all the blood and guts. That part was on point. As soon as the movie was over, I suggested to Bella we leave immediately, trying not to show how bad I was feeling.

It was starting to get a little late, so I decided that it would have to be now or never. So I took a deep breath, and worked up the nerve to tell her.

"Bella?" I asked. Here goes.

"Yeah, Jacob?" I got a good look at her, and realized that she's just not ready. Sure, she was getting a little better. She had gained almost all of the lost weight back, and she looked like she was sleeping a little better, but I can't do this to her. Not now. The realization hit me, and it hurt, but not as much as it would to see her in the amount of pain she was in a month or two ago. So I decided that it would have to wait.

"I'm glad we got to do this." I had to try really hard to put a convincing smile on my face, and I was hoping that she bought it.

She didn't believe it at first, but then she smiled that beautiful smile of hers and gathered me in a gentle hug.

So, I hope this one was alot better than the origininal chapter. there wasn't much i could do with it, but i really tried. im also going to be adding alot to all of the other chapters, i hope, so like i said its gonna be a day or two before i get a new chapter up. But let me know what you think about it now.

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