Forgiveness
Mercury pushed me against the wall and grabbed my arm. "Be kind to Mom, idiot." he hissed, tightening his hold on me.
"Fuck you, you fucking dick. I will do what ever I want. I will not do what you want me to do." I retorted, punching his arm.
"Guys, please sit down." our mother said softy.
Mercury let me go and we walked in enormous and spacious living room. It was decorated with white leather matching couches and beautiful bay windows that in the sunlight would let the light flood the entire room.
There were a few pictures hung on the wall and they were mainly of Mercury and me. I felt sick to my stomach as I noticed that there were pictures of my sixth grade graduation and prom. There was also a picture of Embry and me, when we went to the Hispanic Festival in Seattle.
"Why do you have so many pictures of us, Mom? Are you a fucking stalker?" I asked annoyed.
"Well," she began.
"Well?" I asked frustrated.
"Madison, shut up!" Mercury said angrily. "Let her talk!" he hissed at me. Boy, this kid was feisty!
"You shut up!" I said curtly. "All you've done is suck up to her, you moron!" I bantered, throwing the decorative pillow at him. "She has you wrapped in her perfect little finger. You are such a fuck!"
He grunted and sat further away from me. "You are hopeless, Love!" he said heatedly.
"And you are fucking stupid. Can't you see that Ashleigh is using you. She didn't love us." I said crossly, staring daggers at her. She looked sad, but I didn't care. There were ten years of pent up frustration and abandonment issues floating in my mind. I wanted to hurt her the way she hurt me.
"Be kind to our mother." Mercury said disapprovingly. "Let's at least listen to what she has to say. There are a lot of things about that night that are still hazy and blurry in my mind."
I frowned at him, but kept quiet. My mother, Ashleigh, smiled kindly at him. She was a good actress. She even looked like she was suffering. Bitch! I mean, witch!
"Madie and Mercy," she began, sitting on the edge of her seat. "I never meant to abandon you two. Madie was my sun and Mercy was my sky. I never meant to hurt any of you. I am sorry if my absence caused you so much pain." she said apologetically.
Whatever! I didn't want to hear it! Her apologies were ten or eleven years too late!
"Just tell us, so we can go back to our lives." I said grudgingly.
My mother stared at us, and then adverted her eyes to Theo. They seemed to share a bond. Perhaps they were lovers. Oh, I see! She left us for him! That had to be it!
"I see!" I said sarcastically. "You left us for Theo here, right? You left us for the riches that he offered you?"
Mercury punched my arm and I smacked him square in the face. "Don't fucking hit me!"I shouted, staring menacingly at him.
"Damn, bitch! You pack a mean punch. Who taught you how to fight?" he asked, placing both of his hands on his nose.
"My boyfriend Embry." I said dryly.
"Did they fight this much when they were little?" Theo asked my mother. She nodded, a grin on her face.
"These two have not change at all." she said proudly.
"What the hell do you know about us?" I asked acerbically. "You don't know shit about me!" I grimaced.
"Love, calm down!" Mercury said flatly, taking my arm and pulling me to him. "Be quiet and let her finish." he said angrily.
"Fuck you, asshole." I said, pushing him away from him.
I moved to the far end of the couch and slouched, folding my arms across my chest. Why did I have to be hear? What about my freewill? I wanted to get up and leave, but not before breaking the vase that was on the coffee table on my brother's massive head. What a jerk!
"Two weeks before I left the house," she began, playing nervously with her hands. "I went to tuck you kids in for bed. I went to Madie's room and found it empty. I didn't give it too much thought. She used to like to play hide-n-seek every night. I thought that she was hiding in her usual spot, under Mercy's bed." she stopped, looking up at Mercury. He looked enthralled by her mellifluous voice.
"I remember." I blurted out, smiling like an idiot. Those were innocent days.
"Well, I entered Mercy's room and found a strange woman near his bed. I immediately ran to him, but she flung me across the room. I yelled at Mercy to run away from her, but he was mesmerized by the sound of her voice. He was bewitched and wouldn't... he wouldn't stop staring at her..." she trailed off, shaking her head sadly.
"It was Maia," Theo said in his deep voice. It reverberated across the entire house. It was booming and powerful. I felt myself shake in my seat. "She used to be my mate." he clarified.
"Maia had lost her children many years ago. She would always go to Mercury's room at night to watch him sleep. He reminded her of her son, Matteo. That night she didn't care if Ashleigh saw her. She was tired of hiding in the shadows. She wanted to take Mercury from your mother." Theo said, taking my mother in his arms, and gently caressing her back. "Your mother fought her, but a human can never win against a vampire." he said gravely, staring at me.
"Then what happened?" Mercury asked intrigued.
"Madie came out from under the bed and she attacked her, trying to defend me. She bit her and Madie fell on the floor, complaining of pain. When you heard your sister's cries, you snapped out of the enchantment you were in and ran to us. Maia was already gone, by the time, I managed to reach the phone to call for help. Madie was in so much pain that I thought that I was losing her. But, Theo came in through the window and sucked the poison out of you." she said, smiling tenderly at him.
"You saved me?" I asked him. He nodded and then his eyes returned to my mother. He loved her! He stared at her the way Embry stared at me.
"He saved Madison and after two weeks she returned again. This time she was set on stealing my little boy. I slept in his bed instead, waiting for her. I thought that I could kill her. Boy, was I fooling myself. She bit me. She almost drank my blood, if it wasn't for Elisha. He pulled her off me and... well, he ended her life. The venom was slowly spreading inside me. Elisha was scared that if he sucked out the poison, he would kill me. He told me what would happen after the transformation"
I stared confused at them and sighed. This was too much and half of it I didn't understand. I only had a basic knowledge of vampires, and it was what Jake, Quil and Embry had told me.
"Transformation?" I asked, my eyes darting from Theo to my mother. "What are you guys talking about?"
Mercury was interested too. I could see his face and the attention he was giving our mother.
"When a human has been bitten by a vampire, they undergo a series of transformations. I could explain it, but the less you know the better." Elisha said, as he came in through the open window.
He moved so gracefully. I watched him, as he approached where we were sitting. He was tall, with broad shoulders, lithe and an enigma. His dark short hair contrasted against his pale features. He sat beside me and smiled at me.
"When a newborn is made, they are strong and demand blood. They can't control their thirst. If your mom had stayed with you... she would have killed you." he said slowly.
"Killed us?" Merc and I asked in unison.
"But she loved us!" he managed to say.
"The thirst that I felt at the beginning was stronger than my love for my children. It was stronger than any human emotion." my mother said dejectedly.
"But, I still don't get it. You said that the pain is excruciating, yet you said good bye to us." Mercury said confused.
"Yeah, you looked fine." I said, nodding my head.
"I was in pain, Mercy and Madie." she answered. "I could smell your blood and I desired it. I felt my skin burning in pain and I wanted to die. I didn't want my babies to see me agonizing. I wanted to be far away." she said quietly, looking down at her hands.
"I waited for her at the corner. I was the one that convinced her to leave. I didn't want her to live with the guilt of killing her children. An eternity filled with remorse is worst than death." Elisha said in his gentle voice.
"How do you know?" I asked him, fearing his proximity.
"I killed my own mother." he said flatly.
Mercury stood up and walked to where my mother sat. "Mom, thank you for loving us." he sobbed, opening his arms and wrapping her small body in them. I hated his easiness to forgive.
"Yes, she left us to save us, but why didn't she come back?" I asked annoyed. Mercury flashed me an irate look and then turned to face our mother. "Why did she stay away from us for so long? Why now? Why? Damn it! Why?"
Elisha placed a cold hand on my knee and smiled at me. "It wasn't easy for her, Madison. She felt the weight of the world as she walked away from her two little children screaming for her to come back. It took her three years to learn to drink animal blood, instead of human blood. She needed to know that she was not going to harm you or your brother." he said, his hand still on my knee.
"Please, move your hand away from me." I said curtly, shuddering at the coldness his touch left behind.
"I am sorry. It's not everyday that I am near mortals." he laughed heartedly.
I rolled my eyes and stared at Mercury and our mother. Yes, he'd forgiven her. I still couldn't process all the information that I had just heard.
"I need time to clear my thoughts." I said, standing up and stopping in front of my brother and mother. "I have to think about everything. I just can't forgive you."
"I understand, Love." she exhaled. "I didn't expect you to jump up with happiness the minute you saw me. That's why I did what I did. I know that it was wrong to venture to La Push, but I had to. I needed to see both of my babies."
She gave me a sheepish smile and raised her hands to touch my brother's face. She looked so small next to him. Mercury never smiled like that. He was mesmerized by our mother.
"You were in La Push, Merc?" I mumbled.
"Ah?" he asked, raising his face to look at me.
"Were you in La Push too?" I asked frustrated.
"Oh, yes, why?" he said, smiling down at our mother.
"Since when?" I asked, walking towards them and clutching at his arm. He sighed annoyed and gave me a dirty look.
"Why do you wanna know?" he asked irritated.
"Because I want to know? How come you never visited me?
"Because you were busy fucking Embry." he rebuked.
Bitch! "Are you jealous?" I asked angrily, pinching him.
"Damn, Love, that hurts. And why would I be jealous of you fucking Embry?" he said tiredly.
"'Cause he is hot, muscular and sexy!" I simply said. He snorted and flipped me the finger.
"I don't need to be muscular to fuck, Love!" he said grudgingly.
I heard Theo and Elisha laughing, but I didn't give a flying fuck. I was angry at Merc, for not visiting me when I wanted and needed to see him. I even called his cell phone and left many messages
"Yes you do. No boy will look at you." I said lowly.
"Boy? Why boys?" he asked puzzled.
"Cause you are gay!" I blurted out.
"I'm not gay. I have a fucking girlfriend." he said indignantly.
"Whatever, nice cover up." I laughed. I noticed Mercury's eyebrows furrowed angrily and I took a step back behind Elisha.
"He does have a girlfriend." Theo said, nodding his head. "She is pretty for a puppy." he laughed.
I turned to my mother and she was also nodding. "He does and the puppy is beautiful."
"Puppy?" I asked perplexed, staring at Elisha.
"She is a werewolf." Elisha explained. "Just like your boyfriend. I guess it runs in your family Ashleigh, that your children will be part of our enemies."
Puppy? Werewolf? Girl? No! No! "You are dating Leah?" I shrieked surprised.
"Yes," he paused, and stared around the living room. "What is wrong with that?"
"She's mean! She's scary too! And she has never said hello to me!" I chided.
"Yes, she is!" Elisha said, trembling at the thought of her name. I already liked him!
"She's sweet! And I love her." Mercury said softly, a grin appearing on his face.
"How long have you two been together?" I asked interested.
Mercury raised his gaze to the ceiling and started counting with his fingers.
"Well, I am waiting for an answer." I said belligerently.
"Since you ran away after beating Micah's ass. I ran after you and found her in the woods. We clicked instantly and we have been together since."
That's five weeks! "You have been in La Push for five weeks and you have not come to visit me once!" I said hotly.
He rolled his eyes and sneered at me. "You've been too busy getting pregnant, Madison."
"No!" I snarled. "What? How did you know?" I shouted. Elisha covered his ears and took a step back.
"Leah and Embry are werewolves, duh! They have their mind links. Every fucking blow job you gave him, my poor Leah saw." he said acerbically.
"What? That's impossible!" I yelled. Why didn't Embry tell me this about werewolves?
"No, it's not impossible. Embry had been thinking about if for a while. And she told me today, before this guy and that other girl barged into our house and dragged me out of the cottage." he said, staring daggers at Elisha and Cheyenne.
"I have to return home. I want to speak to Embry." I muttered.
"Are you going to abort it?" he asked worriedly.
"How did you know? Why do you care?" I asked him dryly. How did he know?
"I do know you!" he said sadly, ambling towards me. "You are my sister and I love you. I know that you are afraid of turning out..." he trailed off, looking back at our mother. "Sorry." he said softly and then turned to face me. "You'll be a great mother, Madie, but please don't kill the baby."
"Too bad that I can't say the same about you." I said dejectedly, turning away from him. "Can I leave now?" I asked my mother.
She nodded and looked straight at the floor. "I'll drive you to your house." she said despondently.
"Thank you." I said flatly, turning to face my brother one last time. "Thanks for caring so much, Mercury Alexis. It shows what kinda brother you are. Hell, you are just like the rest of my brothers.."
"What about you, Love? Have you ever wonder that I was in pain too? Did you ever asked me how I was feeling?" he asked hurt.
I nodded my head. "Yes, I did! I tried hard to make you acknowledge me. But you never looked me straight in the eye! I gave up on you the night that you said 'I wish you were never born'... Thank you for reminding me how unwanted I have always been!" I sobbed, letting all the tears that I have been holding back flow freely.
"Madison, don't cry!" my mother said, placing her cold hand on my forearm. "I loved you and I still do. I have never regretted having you. It was a joy to bring you into the world. I have been blessed."
"I want to go to my house." I wept. "Take me back home, please."
"She can't go back to La Push, those werewolves might destroy her. But you can have my car." Theo said.
Cheyenne came from outta nowhere and handed my mother a set of keys. My mother ambled towards me and handed me the keys. "You don't have to return it. I want you to have it." she said smiling at me. I didn't look at her, I kept staring down at the keys in my hand.
Cheyenne snorted annoyed and stood beside Elisha. "Ungrateful bitch." she mumbled loudly.
"Shut up, cunt! You are just jealous that she loves me more than you."I rebuked angrily.
She tried to come at me, but Theo held her back. I could tell that he was furious at my attitude. I didn't care. I only wanted Embry. I only cared for Embry. I could pictured his pain expression.
My mother walked me down the stairs and down a narrow hall that led to a white door.
She opened the door for me and smiled. We walked into the garage and held my breath when I saw all the cars that they had parked in it.
"My car is that white Land Rover, it's yours." she said gently.
"Thank you. I will return it as soon as I can." I muttered, playing with my hands.
We walked in silent to it and she sighed. "Love," she paused. "Have you really thought about what you'll do with the baby?" she asked careful.
"No, why have you?" I shrugged.
"Well, I just found out about the baby, when I heard it's tiny heartbeats." she said with a smile.
"You did?" I asked, staring oddly at her. She looked happy that I was going to be a mother. She probably wanted steal it from me. "Why do you asked?"
"Well, I would like to be there for you." she blurted out, she raised her hand to my shoulder and she sighed. "Have you been to the doctor?"
"No, I just found out today and you are already know the rest of what happened." I said flatly.
"I'm sorry. I should have planned it better." she laughed.
"Yeah," I snorted. "You should have planned it better." I said sarcastically.
"Can I go with you when you go to see OB/GYN?" she asked hopefully.
"I guess. I have a feeling that you are going to be in my life for a long time." I said nonchalantly, shrugging
She shifted on the balls of her feet and sighed, smiling at me. How awkward was this? How old was she when she had me?
"Are you afraid of me?" she asked, ending my train of thoughts.
"Yes." I said.
"You don't have to be." she reassured me, taking my free hand in her cold one. I stared at her face and started remembering happy parts of my childhood. Yes, she was my world. I still loved her, but I was still hurting.
"Why not? You are a vampire? Should I trust you?" I said hesitantly.
She let go of my hand and walked towards the white Land Rover. "You have a point, but you can trust me. I only drink animal's blood."
"Oh," I said casually, walking towards her.
She opened the driver's side door for me and gestured me tog et in. I obeyed and she closed the door for me. She moseyed over to the passenger seat and got in the car. She programmed GPS to guide me back to La Push. When she was done, she handed me a small black cellphone.
"What's this for?" I asked confused, opening the small flip phone.
"It's your phone. That way you can let me know that you made it safely to La Push and also to keep us in contact. You can call me whenever you schedule the appointment." she said timidly.
"I don't think I will." I said blatantly
Her eyes saddened and she bit her lower lip. "Please, Madison, that way, I will be at peace that you and the baby are safe." she said, her voice quivering.
"Now you cared." I said dully, inserting the key in the ignition.
"I've always cared." she managed to say, taking my hand in hers.
"You hurt me, Mom." I sobbed.
"I know and I am sorry." she croaked, squeezing my hand gently.
"I cant forgive you, at least not yet." I cried, turning my head to the side to hide my tears.
"I know. I do love you" she whispered.
"I highly doubt it." I laughed.
"I do, Love." she said, running her cool hand through my hair. She always loved caressing my hair at night or when I was sad. She loved the fact that I was mixed and didn't have her pale complexion. "I love you so much, my angel."
"I'm not an angel, Ashleigh. I am dead!" I said coldly. "I have to go now."
"Yes, of course." she said, forcing a smile as she got out of the passenger's seat. "Bye, please call me when you get home safely, sweet angel."
I waited for her to close the door and started the engine. I felt the weight of the world on my shoulder. I had to make so many decisions. I only wished that I had more time to think and analyze my entire life. The garage door opened and I slowly drove down their massive drive way. I stopped to look back and found Mercury, Elisha and Theo standing beside a distraught Ashleigh.
I stopped the car and put it on parking and ran out of the vehicle. "Mom," I shouted, walking briskly to where she stood. "Mom!"
My mother removed her arms from around Mercury and Theo and ran to meet me. "Love, my baby." she whimpered, as her cold arms encircled me.
"Mom, I am sorry. I am so sorry! I missed you, please don't leave me. I am so scared. I don't want Daddy to make me abort this baby. I am so scared! Please, Mommy, don't leave me!" I begged her, clinging to her and inhaling her soft scent.
"Never, Madison. I will never leave you!" she said, kissing my cheek and wiping away my tears.