Such amazing feedback, please keep the reviews coming :)
I think it was after my second blackout that I awoke to red flashing lights and the sound of some sort of digital communication. I strained my ears to try and hear what they were saying, actually that's not entirely the truth, I merely wanted to hear if there was any mention of Ziva, but all I could hear were the vibrations of deep hollow voices, none of which sparked any familiarity or any of my interest.
It felt like hours later, but it was probably minutes, but I remember this man bent down to me, he had an authoritative voice bellowing through me with nostalgia, he spoke his words so carefully:
'We got you, stay still, you're okay'
He put his hand on my arm reassuring me, it was a nice touch. I should remember that.
This man, he struck something inside of me, almost like I was kid again looking up to my father and trying to string together a sentence to make sense of a situation: 'where is my mother?' I wanted to say, but I just cried and I think my father was a little relieved that he didn't have to answer any questions
I think all I managed to say to this man was Ziva's name, which I guess is better than sobbing onto the bitumen wondering how it all went so wrong. Despite my best efforts I don't think he heard me because he stood up and walked away..
I still had no idea where I was or what was happening. I was caught between tragedy and her.. And I just don't think connecting the two were even options. I'd been there before and I ended up in the middle of a desert, carelessly offering my life to the highest bidder.
Anyway, I heard this sound like a machine, it sounded close, I heard the 'safe' words they use, the ones they teach you day 2 of training, yanno:
'We're getting you out of here.. You're safe.. It's going to be okay.'
Which I always thought meant nothing when we said them to people, but I did believe them when they said it, it was comforting I guess.. I tried to look around and see what was happening. But all I could do was listen, there were these terrifying sounds of metal being crushed, ripped and destroyed, like someone was killing the terminator or like I was in that movie "Wall-e"
I wasn't meant to, but I listened to some of the recordings from the scene. There was this moment where I'm screaming in agony and they're trying to obtain information from me.. Just the usual stuff: "Do you know your name?" and all I was doing was screaming at these men, these medics who were trying to help me and I couldn't even answer them. I just screamed at them "WHERE IS SHE!?" over and over again, every question they asked I screamed at them, every word they said I screamed at them.. I think the worst thing I screamed was "LET ME FUCKING DIE!" I was crying in between each word… Of all the things I remember, I don't remember that, any of that. I don't cry, and yet there were moments where the scene is quiet and all you can hear is a grown man gasping for air amid tears. Yeah, that was tough to hear.