Sooooo a couple people asked for another so here it is! YAY! Umm, so for this one I put Nick Fury at about 48 years of age (based on the 1965 update by Stan Lee that put him in the present - source Wikipedia) and I added some Russian for Clint/Natasha. (The translation is from Google Translate, so I'm sorry if it's not the real translation.
Let me repeat: THE TRANSLATION IS FROM GOOGLE TRANSLATE SO I APOLOGIZE MOST SINCERELY IF IT'S INCORRECT. Kay. Keep that in mind.
Anyway . . . hope you like it and if you do, tell me what you think :) I may or may not update, depends on whether or not I get another idea for it. Kay. Read on

Baby!Avengers and the Babysitter

"Daddy?"

"Yeah, Phil."

"There's someone at the door, daddy."

"Oh good God. What now?"

"She's preetty, daddy."

"What does she want?"

"I dunno. She didn't want to talk to me. She wants to talk to you."

"Did you let her in?"

"No, daddy. I'm not stupid. You told me not to talk to strangers."

"Is she still there?"

". . . Yes, daddy."

"Who's she talking to?"

"Tony, daddy."

"Is that why I hear so much screaming?"

"No, daddy. That's Thor and Loki."

"What are they doing now?"

"Loki tried to cut Thor's hair while he took a nap."

"He did what now?"

"It didn't work too well, though. Loki got shocked pretty badly."

"Shocked?"

"Static electricity, daddy. Bruce and Tony told me all about it."

"You wanna be a scientist now, Phil?"

"Yes, daddy."

"I thought you wanted to go into the military, like me."

". . . Can I do both?"

"Hey, eye-patch!"

"What, Tony?"

"There's some lady at the door asking for you."

"Thanks, Tony. I'll keep that in mind."

"She's pretty hot."

"Don't you start with me."

"Mr. Fury!"

"For the last time, Steve. If you're not going to call me dad, at least call me Nick."

"Yes sir, Mr. Fury."

*sigh* "What's up, Steve?"

"Tony wanted me to tell you there's someone at the door."

"Oh for the love of –"

". . . He also wanted me to tell you that she's . . . extremely good-looking."

"Ooh, small soldier's blushing!"

"That's not very nice, Tony."

"You don't like the nickname? I can change it. Let's see here . . . mini-soldier, tiny soldier, minuscule soldier."

"I'm not that much shorter than you, Tony."

"Yeah, I know." *sigh* "Someday, you'll be taller than me. But you better believe I'm going to make your life a living hell until then."

"TONY!"

"Yeah, eye-patch."

"Watch your language, young man."

"Suck my –"

"Я ненавижу тебя идти умирать!" (*Russian - I hate you go die*)

"Natassshhhhaa."

"Оставь меня в покое вы, кусок дерьма!" (*Russian - Leave me alone, you piece of shit*)

"I loooovveeee youuuuuuu."

"Oh God. When did they wake up?"

"Shortly after Thor and Loki, Mr. Fury, sir."

"I told you, call me Nick."

"идти умирать! идти умирать, идти умирать, идти умирать!" (*Russian - go die x 4*)

*heavy sigh* "I can't do this anymore, Phil."

"Mr. Fury, sir?"

"What did I just say, Steve?"

"Tony's letting the woman in."

"He's what!?"

"Do you want me to stop him, daddy?"

"Nick Fury?"

"Yeah, that's me."

"Hello. My name is Maria Hill. I'm here about the ad you put in the paper."

". . . An ad?"

"You put in ad in the paper, daddy? For what?"

"A babysitter, eye-patch? Really? Don't you think I'm old enough to watch everyone by myself?"

"Son, look at me. I am 48 years old and I can't watch over these kids by myself."

"Maybe you're just incompetent."

"Maybe you should just shut your mouth."

"I think I would be a good babysitter for your kids, Mr. Fury."

"Are you certified?"

"Yes, sir."

"In what?"

"CPR, First-Aid, Oxygen, and Lifeguard Training."

"So we'd be safe at the pool. Great, eye-patch. Well done."

"Steve?"

"Yes, sir?"

"I give you full permission to hit your brother."

". . . I'm afraid I can't do that, sir."

"And just why the hell not?"

"Watch your language, eye-patch."

"That's it, Tony . . ."

"I'm afraid I have to concur with the rude teen."

"Well, excuse me, Miss Maria Hill. But I didn't ask for your opinion, did I?"

"I'm simply thinking about what's best for the children, sir."

"Well, gooood for you."

"Are you going away, daddy?"

"No, Phil. I'm just thinking about how much work I have, that's all."

"I don't want you to go away, daddy. I'll help you with your work."

"That's very sweet of you, Phil. But I don't think you can help me with this kind of work."

"Mr. Fury, sir?"

"Yeah, Steve?"

"If we get a babysitter, can I get a punching bag?"

"Say what now?"

"He wants a punching bag, eye-patch. He's been asking about it for weeks."

"Really?"

"Well, he's only been asking me. But since I don't have any money . . ."

"You've got plenty of money, Tony. Don't think I haven't seen that stockpile at the bottom of your sock drawer."

". . . I don't know what you're talking about, eye-patch."

"MAN OF FURY!"

"Ohhhh god."

"MAN OF FURY! LOKI IS MAD AT ME AGAIN!"

"Why, Thor?"

"He says I shocked him."

"Did you?"

"Not on purpose."

"Loki!"

". . . "

"Loki!"

". . ."

"LOKI, YOU MISCHEVIOUS LITTLE SHIT, GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

"*cough cough* Language! *cough cough*"

"Shut your mouth, Tony."

"Nick Fury, sir?"

"Yes, Miss Hill."

". . . How did you wind up with this many children?"

*points to Phil* "Blame him."

"Me, daddy?"

"Yes, you."

"What do you want, tiny man?"

"Excuse me?"

"What do you want, Father?"

"You don't have to call me that, Loki."

"You want Steven to call you that."

"I want Steve to call me something other than sir or Mr. Fury."

"But you don't want me to call you that."

"You can call me whatever the hell you want, Loki. I honestly don't give a damn."

"Eloquently put, little man."

"Except that. You can't call me that."

"Make up your mind, Father, dear. I'm getting tired of this game."

"Be nice to your brother. There. Done. Go play."

*evil hiss* "Make me, tiny man."

"LOOKII! COME BACK!"

"Still want to be my babysitter, Miss Hill?"

". . . Well . . . I, um . . ."

"мой паук! мой паук! мой паук!" (*Russian - my spider*)

"That's Clint. Right there. And the red-head he's chasing is Natasha. You've already met Thor and Loki – their brothers."

"Really . . .?"

"This is Phil, right here. He's my little angel."

"Aww, daddy!"

"Gross. Get a room."

"That smart-mouth is Tony and the blonde next to him is Steve. Bruce should be around here somewhere . . ."

"He's in the backyard, eye-patch."

". . . Why?"

"Throwing rocks at squirrels."

". . . Why?"

"Loki made him angry."

"Ah."

"Is that . . . all of them?"

"Yeah, I think so. Still want to babysit them?"

"Well . . ."

"She can stay, eye-patch. I like her."

"Don't be a creep, Tony."

"I like her too, sir."

"Not you too, Steve."

"Excuse me? Miss Hill?"

"Umm . . . yes, Phil?"

"Can I call you mama?"

"Umm . . ."

"мой паук! I caught you!" (*Russian - my spider*)

"CLINT!"

"MAN OF FURY! LOKI'S MAD AGAIN!"

"Mama?"

"Ma'am? I would like a punching bag."

"Maria, can I call you that? Steven wants a punching bag and I want another arc reactor."

"Miss Hill?"

"Yes, Mr. Fury?"

"They like you."

"Oh. Good?"

"You're hired."