ZOMG quick note! I just want to say happy birthday to my younger brother, Chris! (Even though his birthday was like, almost a week ago.)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! DOCTOR OCTAGONAPUS BRAAAAAH!!

--

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked.

"Let's start with when you were raped. I know you don't want to talk about it, but--"

"Actually, I've been dying to talk to someone about it."

He sat up on the bed across from me, I gazed down at the blankets as I began to explain what happened.

"See, I was walking alone from school one night. I was in a musical and I didn't live far from the school, so I figured I would be safe."

I began to clutch the blankets tightly. Even though he was dead, and even though it was me who killed him, I still felt so much anger and hate towards him. I could my temperature rise with the thought of him. I still continued, even though I was beginning to cry.

"He was waiting for me. He pulled the 'lost puppy' trick that I thought I would never fall for. I don't feel like talking about what happened next." I whispered.

I laid my head down in his lap and he rubbed my head affectionately, wondering what to say next. We didn't speak for the rest of the afternoon because I fell asleep.

--

"Tsukiko, wake up," L nudged me slightly, "If you keep sleeping, you won't sleep tonight. Plus, they're serving dinner."

"I'm not that hungry." I mumbled and rolled over.

"Come on, get out of bed."

"No."

"Alright then, I'll leave you alone."

L left and I fell asleep for an undetermined length of time. When I woke up, I was in a cold sweat and I was beginning to shake.

"Tsukiko, is something wrong?"

I turned around and saw L sitting on the floor, actually eating something other than candy for once. He apparently hadn't left the room because we were still cuffed. I opened the drawer of my nightstand, hoping to find some kind of drug. I only found a phonebook and a TV remote.

"You're finally starting to go into withdrawal." L remarked as he watched me run around the room.

I screamed something to him, but I don't remember what it was. I remember opening the door and attempting to run down the hallway, but I didn't make it too far because L pulled me back. I had lost a great deal of my strength because of the drugs, so L was able to get me airborne before I crashed onto the floor, unable to move half out of surprise and half out of pain. He stood over me and picked me up, examining my hand and walking me down the hallway. I didn't need to go through with this. I could relapse once, then go back to rehab and be better. Plenty of American celebrities have done it, why can't I? What makes me different? I faintly remember sitting in the med ward where I was uncuffed and examined, but that's all I remember from that night. I woke up the next morning with a cast on my arm and L standing over me.

"What happened?" I whispered as he handed me my medication.

"You went into withdrawal, went crazy, tried to run, I pulled you back and accidentally broke your wrist. Sorry."

So much for enjoying the water while I was here. I swallowed the pills L handed me and sat up, rubbing my head.

"I feel like going for a walk." I said.

"Okay." L replied, cuffing my other hand.

I sighed and walked out of the room, talking about how I couldn't wait to just get out of here and go back home, when I bumped into someone.

"Sorry, my mistake." He apologized in a heavy British accent.

"No, I should really watch--"

I looked up at this point and my jaw almost dropped. I covered my mouth and looked back to L, who was shuffling his feet.

"Mr. Clapton.." I finally whispered.

"Yes, and you are…?"

"My name is Tsukiko Namida, I'm such a fan of your music."

"Drugs are such a terrible thing." he said rubbing my head.

"Oh this? Yes, they are. That's why I'm here. I was addicted to everything, even though I don't remember any of it."

"That's why this Crossroads Centre is here. Now what happened to your arm?" He asked.

"Oh this? I accidentally broke it yesterday.

He took out a marker and signed it with a smile, walking away.

I waited until he was gone and turned around to L, my eyes as wide as dinner plates.

"Don't say it." He mumbled.

"I'm never washing my head again, and I am never taking off this cast." I sighed and skipped away.

--FAST FORWARD--

It's been a long month, but it's finally over, and I'm going back home. It's September 1st, and I can feel the chill coming in when I stepped off the plane, greeted by a group hug.

"So you're clean now?" Matsuda asked.

"Clean as a whistle, it seems. And look who signed my cast!"

Matsuda looked at the cast and frowned.

"That's cool, but what happened?"

"I'll tell you later. For now, let's go home."

I rode home in L's limo, talking to Watari about how I had met Eric Clapton and he played for everyone there and about my arm and how it became broken.

"Now now, Ryuzaki, I thought we raised you better than that." He sighed.

"I didn't do it on purpose," He frowned, "I just meant to stop her."

We walked into the tower and L dug through a box and pulled out another set of cuffs as he slapped it onto Light. Apparently L had been talking with everyone while I was asleep, because I had no idea what was going on. Apparently Misa didn't either.

"As of now, I will have constant surveillance on Light Yagami, Misa Amane and Tsukiko Namida under the suspicions that they are, in fact, Kira."

My jaw dropped. Everyone knew that L had been suspecting Light and Misa for quite some time, but me? Everyone's gaze shifted to me and my palms began to sweat. L gave me his typical detective gaze as he spoke again.

"Let's face it Tsukiko, if anyone is more suspicious than Light or Misa, it would be you. It's a little convenient that the good Doctor Dwyer is now dead, and frankly the conversation we had while watching Sweeney Todd only confirmed it."

"So watching the movie was merely a test?" I asked, aggravated.

"You could say that," He replied and tugged on our handcuffs, "Until I deem it necessary, you and Light will be cuffed to me so that I may keep an eye on both of you."

"Just kill him mistress," Malak whispered in my ear, "I know you can do it."

"No," I whispered between gritted teeth, "I refuse to kill anyone anymore."