Hey everyone! Thanks to all those who favorited, followed, and reviewed! Special S/O to LoveSparkle for her opinions :) I'd really like to know what you guys think about each chapter, and how I can improve. Also, let me know what you think about my alphabet series! Your reviews are what's going to make me update sooner, honestly. So without further ado... Chapter 3, Dreaming!

Dreams are what you want them to be. They make you who you are and what you want to be. But when you're asleep, the dreams control you, not always for the better.

I was safe.

Laying next to him, gazing at the stars, a quilt picnic blanket under our backs, warmth radiating between our bodies. I felt safe for the first time since my mom left. Nothing could go wrong.

I turned toward him. The autumn breeze, still warm from the last bits of summer, gently moved his dirty blond hair. He looked at me, and I saw what I had hoped to see in his eyes… love. We leaned towards each other, lips almost touching.

The scene changed.

I was somewhere different. It was dark and after a few moments I realized that I was standing…in my living room? But I was in the park with James! A faint rustle came from my dad's room, down the hall. I walked towards it and peeked through the crack in the door.

My blood froze.

My dad was standing there, a knife in his hand. And on the floor under him…James, unmoving. My dad heard me, turned and said to me in an eerily calm voice, "I told you he didn't care." He vanished and I ran to James.

He wasn't breathing.

"No!" I told myself, "He isn't dead! He can't be! I never told him that I loved him! That if he died, I would die! I felt his pain as much as he did when he was hurt. He laughed, and I laughed. He was sad, I was depressed." I kept screaming to myself "No! No! No! He wasn't dead! NO!"

I was dreaming.

"NO!" I screamed as my body shot itself out of bed. It was a nightmare. None of it was real. James was still alive. I sat there, covered in a feverish sweat, trying to calm myself down, every so often a lonely tear making its way down my face.

The door opened.

I only noticed for a second until suddenly I was on the floor, my head throbbing where it had been hit…by my dad. I knew he had been drinking, the stench of liquor radiating of off him like heat from the sun. I tried to get up, to move away from the monster.

I wanted to.

Then just as quickly as it happened, he disappeared, not before I received another punch. I heard him run out the back door. Why did he leave? The question was quickly answered, by a form entering the room.

"Kendall?" James said.

I told him what happened. Everything my dad had ever done to me. His face contorted, expressions of sadness, fear, anger, rage, chasing each other in an endless game of tag across his face. But he still didn't know everything. What I did to myself, how I felt, my journal.

He would never know.

I forgot to say this earlier, but this story doesn't exactly follow BTR, and I think I may have to edit the past chapters... :( But I promise that the next chapter is longer, and will might hold a little... Kames surprise :D Also, I think I will have to change the rating to M, just cause of what's going on in the future, so just watch out for that! Review review review please! You'll get a S/O if you voice your opinion!