I don't know how this crap came out of my head. I'm really tired okay? And I had to write it really quickly. So I'm sorry.
This is for MeAndMyReflection, who requested some specific person being murdered by three specific other people... Not telling you who yet! You'll have to read it to find out!
A figure waits in the darkness. Patiently. A sickle is clutched in his hand. There is only one thing on his mind, and like most angry and despairing trolls, that thing is murder.
He takes slow, deliberate steps towards his target after making sure nobody's there to watch.
You don't mess with my girl. You don't break her heart, and you certainly don't take her away from me. You, sir, are a selfish fuckass.
A figure waits under the bed. Patiently. A cane is clutched in her hand. There is only one thing on her mind, and like most angry and despairing trolls, that thing is murder.
She lies there. Listen to her target as he breathes. Smells him. Tastes him in her mind.
You lied. You told me you'd never hurt me. Now you've left me with Gamzee, all alone. You punished me for something I could not control.
A figure is watching from the ceiling. Patiently. He holds nothing in his hands. There are many, many things on his mind, but like most crazed and psychopathic trolls, the predominant one is murder.
He hangs there, watching his target, watching his friend come in through the door.
honk. HONK. HOOOONK.
Just for tonight. JUST A LITTLE ONE. Not so important. NOT AT ALL.
You are now the FEMALE FIGURE.
You thought that your target was asleep, but you hear noises. Your hear feet against the floor. You hold your breath and try not to make a single sound, but the footsteps come closer and closer.
And closer.
You are now the CRAZED AND PSYCHOPATHIC TROLL.
You hop down from the ceiling, taking extra care to land lightly and crouch behind the bed.
You don't want your best friend to have him all to himrself. Or your kismesis, for that matter. Maybe you can all come to an arrangement.
You are know the MALE WITH THE SICKLE.
You worry that maybe there is somebody else in the room with you. You have to get this over and done with, quickly, before they try and stop you.
Because you don't think the intruder is here to help you.
You slash at the sleeping man's throat, hoping he'll bleed to death, but a hand reaches out and pulls you beneath the bed. A surprisingly strong hand belonging to…
GAMZEE?
You are now the FEMALE FIGURE. Oh for God's sake your name is Terezi, we can all stop playing around now!
You just kind of jumped in the air and hit your head on the bottom of the bed, because Gamzee and Karkat just dived beneath it to come join you.
"TEREZI?" Karkat whisper-yells.
"KARKAT?"
"WHY ARE YOU BOTH trying to kill Dave?" Gamzee sighs.
"You know full well why," you and Karkat say at the same time, and then you both grin.
Gamzee grins. "Let's just ALL KILL HIM TOGETHER."
"That sounds like a wonderful idea."
15 minutes later
You are now WHOEVER YOU WANT TO BE. Just pick one. Seriously.
You all stand back and look at your masterpiece. The walls are splattered with red blood, your ears sting from screams, and Dave's head is slowly spinning round and round the room thanks to a rope and this thing the humans call a CEILING FAN. Your hands are covered with blood, and you smile at your two partners. They might annoy you sometimes, but at least you can all enjoy a good murder together.
IF YOU ARE TEREZI, Karkat asks you on a date. You say yes, and you each take one of Dave's arms as a keepsake.
IF YOU ARE KARKAT, you decide to inform everybody on the ship about the unfortunate news. Everybody looks very sad and you blame it on English and then everything's okay again.
IF YOU ARE GAMZEE, you basically take Dave's head off the ceiling fan and play football with Karkat for a half hour, thus restoring your moirallegiance.