Authoress' Note: Yay Spock and Uhura! The pairing that started it all! (In the context of this story, I mean. You know, I never did intend to write this much. ;) )

From the Inside Out

Spock's jaw tightens almost imperceptibly as he gazes up at the arrival and departure screen at Starbase 6's space dock terminal. Outside, several light years away he assumes, an ion storm is kicking up clouds of galactic dust making it impossible for any outgoing or incoming flights to Earth possible. It has been 2.16 hours since the vidscreen flashing in front of him has changed, a fact that irks Spock to no end. If he can be irked that is.

He assured Jim only four hours ago that he would make it in time for what the Captain termed "a special briefing". Unwilling to be sucked into Jim Kirk's usual vagueness, Spock has only allowed himself to dwell on the thought of this special briefing once since his departure from Vulcan II and subsequent arrival at Starbase 6. No doubt he will have several more hours to speculate and form a hypothesis concerning the situation he will find himself in upon his arrival at Starfleet.

Spock tears his eyes away from the unchanging screen and scans the terminal methodically, glancing at each passerby in turn. He sweeps over a familiar sight and has to do a double take to make sure he has seen correctly. Satisfied that his eyes are not "playing tricks on him", he gathers up a thin suitcase suitable for space travel and moves determinedly toward his destination.

She is wearing her traditional red Starfleet uniform already, with its shining black knee-high boots, and her hair is swept familiarly up and out of her face into a long ponytail hanging down her back. Her skin looks slightly darker than he remembers it, and he decides it must be some affect of the Vulcan II sun. He slows his approach, listening intently. She's talking animatedly into a personal communicator, her hip jutted out and her free hand gesticulating wildly.

Spock watches her from a few yards away, and when she clicks the communicator shut, he makes his move. As he nears her, his heart beating calmly and surely, he stretches out his hand and places it gently on her shoulder. She jumps slightly, startled by the sudden contact and puts her hand to her heart, whipping her head around to look at him with surprise.

"Oh!" she exclaims, her eyes wide. She stares at his hand on her shoulder, and Spock removes it so as to not make her feel any more uncomfortable than their meeting will most likely be otherwise. Her breathing returns to normal after a few seconds as her eyes dart up and down, assessing him. He does the very same, clasping his hands behind his back in the usual stance he takes while studying something new and different, for she is an entirely new creature to him.

"I did not expect to see you here, Nyota. I have just visited my father on Vulcan II and was informed of your departure only days before. I assumed that you would reach Earth before me," he says casually.

Still flustered, Uhura stutters slightly as she responds, "Yes, I did leave Vulcan II several days ago, however I made several stops at a few other bases before coming here. You could say I was taking the 'scenic route'."

"You do not wish to return to Earth?" Spock asks, his slanted eyebrows drawn together.

Uhura shakes her head. "No, I miss Earth, I really do. This may seem like some silly emotional thing to you, but I was anxious about returning. I was anxious about seeing . . ."

"About seeing me?" he finishes for her, and she swallows hard, nodding. He blinks at her and cocks his head slightly, "I do not understand. Why should you be anxious about seeing me?"

Uhura gives an exasperated sigh, and I can see she is searching for the right words to convey her meaning. "Normally it's an awkward affair when people who have ended a relationship see each other again, especially after a long time. You can't just bury those feelings you had about the other person. Sometimes they rush up again, out of nowhere, and you can't push them back down."

She looks down at her bag sitting on the floor as silence falls between them. Spock for once has nothing to say, and he suddenly feels something he has never felt before. It isn't a feeling as much as it is an unidentified emotion long repressed into his subconscious. He reaches out and rests his hand gently on Uhura's shoulder again. She closes her eyes at the touch, and one of her hands slides over his comfortingly. He does not pull away for several minutes. It is the longest contact he has ever had with her.

"Nyota, I must assure you of something, if you will allow it," Spock says, and she turns toward him, intrigue in her eyes.

"Yes, go on."

"You must know that I have changed much since you last saw me two years ago. I am more experienced in dealing with Humans and more apt to their wants and needs. I have learned things about myself and about your race that I never thought possible. I believe in some way I have found my mother in myself," Spock pauses and holds up a hand as Uhura opens her mouth excitedly. "I know this was a wish of yours at one time, and I only wish I could have found it sooner if only to please you. I have been most lax in that respect, and I ask for your forgiveness. However, you must know that first and foremost, I am a Vulcan and have been steeped in Surak's teachings my entire life. Though I took pleasure from our time together I assure you that, all circumstances withstanding, I could not have followed you. I could not have given up the only part of myself I have left. My duty to my people is not just a biological one, it is a personal duty, a promise, that I will keep my people's culture alive."

Uhura blinks at him a few times, her mouth still wide open. Perhaps sensing her own impropriety she closes it slowly, and to Spock's silent dismay her eyes fill with tears. He had hoped she would understand. He makes a move toward her, but she shakes her head, pressing her fingers to her trembling lips.

"I'm not angry with you, Spock," she says, taking in a shuddering breath, her eyes fixed at the ceiling. "I just . . . I just don't think I know you anymore, you know? You've changed right before my eyes."

Spock's lips twitch upward, "And so have you, Nyota."

She laughs, hiccupping and smiling through her tears. She wipes her eyes with her wrists, carefully trying not to smudge the makeup she insists on wearing. Spock bends down and pulls a square of cloth from the outside pocket of his suitcase. Uhura chokes with laughter as she takes it in both hands and dabs at her eyes some more.

"What on Earth are you doing with a handkerchief, Spock?" she says shakily, "Vulcans don't cry last time I checked."

"However, Humans do, and I am doing my utmost to be prepared for every situation."

Uhura finishes wiping her eyes, hands the handkerchief back, and takes a sip of water from a bottle in her bag. Spock watches her carefully as she takes a deep breath to steady herself and is reminded of his mother when she had the very same emotional outbursts as he grew up. He finds that they do not bother him now as much as they once did.

"So, are you bonded or married now?" Nyota asks suddenly, a gleam in her eyes.

Spock is momentarily taken aback by the abruptness of her question. He had not thought to be interrogated so soon about that particular subject. Clearing his throat, he approaches the subject with as much caution and gentle hesitance as he approaches a mathematical equation.

"I have been bonded."

"So . . . you're not married?"

"In Human terms, no. A bonding usually occurs between male and female Vulcans at the age of seven. Obviously that wasn't possible for the two of us. The ceremony itself has only bonded us telepathically until the proper time."

"Mm, I see," Uhura says, and Spock senses that she wishes to say something more.

"Nyota, you know you can ask me anything you wish. No question is inappropriate for our situation."

Uhura seems to chew on her words a minute, and then she looks at me mischievously, a look I have not seen for some time. I raise an eyebrow at her sudden change in demeanour.

"Spock, what's she like?"

"What is she "like"?" he repeats, puzzled.

"Yeah, what is her personality like? What does she look like?"

Spock chooses his words honestly, but carefully. "She reminds of another young woman I know. One who is intelligent, confident, and unwavering. As for what she looks like, I will leave that up to your vivid imagination for now, as someday it would please me for you to meet her yourself."

"Meet her? Really?" Nyota says uncomfortably, "Are you sure that's a wise thing to do?"

"You were one of my very first Human friends and my confidante. Why should you not meet her? She will be honoured."

"Then I will be honoured to meet her," Uhura says, and gathers up her bags for departure. "Until then, will you do me the honour of accompanying me home? I believe we have two years worth of news to discuss, don't we?"

"Yes," Spock says, picking up his suitcase and falling in step next to the young lieutenant, "You are quite right."