Chapter 70

Heliops Island

Just prior to the Presidential election, Cavil's assistant, Aaron Doral, gave an interview to D'Anna Biers in which he stated that drug and alcohol use, especially the use of stimulants, was prevalent on all the Colonial battlestars. When asked for a reference, Doral refused, saying only that his source was currently serving on a battlestar and had informed the Cylons of the low morale among the pilots and the lack of seriousness with which they took their jobs. Admiral William Adama's refusal to respond to repeated queries by the reporter was taken by many as a confirmation of Doral's statement. President Adar refused comment saying only that Admiral Adama was handling the investigation.

-Bartell, History of the Second Cylon War

.

More than once during her first week on the Galactica, Kara thought about Jack Fisk's observation that living on a battlestar was like living with a big family. She felt an even greater connection to Jack when she walked into the hangar the second day and saw Galen Tyrol.

"Chief," she shouted before she realized that everyone in the group of fifteen new pilots was suddenly looking at her.

Tyrol looked up from the floor where he was working under a Viper. For a moment he couldn't tell who had shouted at him. Then he saw her and waved.

Captain Hamish McCall, the senior pilot who was conducting their tour of the ship, asked sarcastically, "Would you like for us to stop so you and the Chief can chat?"

"No, sir," Kara answered embarrassed.

As they proceeded through the hangar to look at the launch tubes, Karl punched her lightly on the shoulder. "Way to go, Starbuck."

"He used to work for Jack Fisk," Kara hissed. "If it wasn't for Chief, I'd never have gotten the job."

"What's he doing here?" Sharon asked.

"Jack said he wanted to do something different. He joined the military. I guess he got assigned to the G."

"He's cute," Sharon said and got a dirty look from Karl.

They reached the control station of one of the launch tubes. "Gather around," McCall shouted at them. He explained the procedure to them as a Viper was launched. "This is what some of you will get to do tomorrow."

Kara looked at Narcho on the other side of the group, grinned and raised her eyebrows.

McCall then took them to the part of the hangar where the Raptors were kept.

Kara watched Sharon. She didn't appear any more or less interested than the other Raptor pilots in what was going on. As they were on the way for McCall to show them the officer's rec room and Sick Bay, Kara fell back until she was walking beside Sharon and Karl.

"What do you hear from your friend?" She asked Sharon, hoping that Sharon would understand what she meant.

"He wants me to write to him. He gave a post office box number."

"How did he tell you that?"

"A phone call before I left Caprica. All he gave me was the post office box number. He said to address the letters to Joe Valerii."

Karl snickered. "Dear Uncle Joe."

"That's all he told you?" Kara asked skeptically.

"That's it," Karl said. "I was there when she got the call."

They had dropped farther behind the others. Sharon turned to her. "You gave me up, didn't you?"

Karl said. "Kara would never…"

"I had to," Kara admitted. "It's the only way I could get all of us on board the G together. But you're safe. I only told Admiral Adama."

That was the truth. Sharon didn't need to know that the admiral had told Saul Tigh.

"Keep up," McCall shouted at them.

"I don't frakking believe it," Karl hissed as they hurried to catch up with the group.

"Believe it," Kara said. "We'll talk later." She walked up between Narcho and Flat Top. "Hi, guys."

Flat Top leaned over and whispered, "It's called fraternization."

"What?" Kara asked.

"You and the Chief. You're an officer. He's enlisted. That's a big no-no."

She punched him on the arm. "I knew him on another job. He's just a friend."

Narcho laughed. "A likely story. Does Lee know? How much will you give us to keep quiet?"

Kara laughed, too. "You guys are hopeless." She sped up and walked up beside Maggie and Seelix.

Maggie looked at her. "You didn't waste any time."

"Not you, too? Chief used to work for Jack Fisk. You remember when I worked for Fisk, don't you?"

"I remember," Maggie answered. "You rode a motorcycle. I worked in a day care. Karl worked in a grocery store. Jared kept the subway software going."

Seelix snickered. "A day care? You?"

Maggie turned. "You want to make something out of it?"

Seelix raised her hands in front of her. "No. You just don't…"

"…seem like the type to take care of rugrats," Maggie finished the sentence for her. "I know. It was a job. When we got to Caprica City we all needed jobs. Not all of us got the glamorous ones wearing black leather."

"Riding a motorcycle in the winter in freezing rain and in the summer when it was ninety-eight degrees was real glamorous. The helmet did wonders for my hair, too."

"Better than getting puked on by somebody else's kids every day." Maggie said. "I got peed on, too, while I was changing the baby boys."

Suddenly they both started laughing. They had come a long way from those days.

"We slept on the floor of the apartment in sleeping bags for six months," Kara said to Seelix. "We couldn't even afford mattresses."

"Sick Bay," McCall shouted pointing to a door on the left. "Learn where it is. Some of you nuggets may need it if you don't pay any better attention flying your ships than you've done today on my tour."

Kara rolled her eyes and made a motion to Maggie and Seelix like she was zipping her lips. Hadn't Admiral Adama told her to keep her mouth shut and stay out of trouble? She hadn't gotten off to a very good start.

...

The next morning they all sat in the pilot's ready room in their flight suits. Their CAG, Captain Taylor explained how four battlestars were grouped fairly close together so they could be watched by one of the Cylon basestars. He drew a diagram on the dry erase board that stood beside the podium. The basestar was roughly in the middle of a formation that had the battlestars in the four corners.

"We signal the basestar every time a group of Vipers or Raptors launches for a training exercise. They then launch the appropriate number of Raiders. You flew with the Raiders on Caprica. You know the drill. I don't need to tell you to follow the procedures exactly as they are laid out. I don't want to have to write someone's family a letter saying they died because they decided to pull some bonehead maneuver and a Raider blew them away."

He paused for a moment to let his words sink in and then continued. "Each of you nuggets will be assigned to an experienced pilot. As we see you're ready, you'll be turned loose on your own. Any questions?"

When there were none, he said, "Lieutenant Kara Thrace, stand up, please."

Wondering what she had done and feeling her cheeks begin to burn, Kara nevertheless stood up as cockily as she dared.

Cole said, "I want to make sure everybody knows that we on the Galactica got a Viper Top Gun from the last session of Flight School. Congratulations Starbuck and welcome aboard."

"Thank you, sir." She sat down, her cheeks still burning.

There was a smattering of applause and she heard somebody in the back say, "It's about time we got some of the best and the brightest."

Kara glanced down the row and saw Kat turn around. Out of sight of the CAG, she made an obscene gesture at whoever had made the comment. It might have been Hot Dog because when Kara looked around to see who had spoken, he had a smug look on his face.

The CAG said, "Okay, settle down. More good news. We also got the second and third place Viper pilots. I'd like for Lieutenants Eammon Pike and Noel Allison to stand. Congratulations Gonzo and Narcho. Don't be shy. Stand up, gentlemen."

Narcho turned with a big grin, waved at the others and raised one fist over his head in a victory salute. Pike didn't look around and almost immediately sat back down.

"A triple…it doesn't get any better than that," The voice in the back said and Kara definitely recognized it as Hot Dog's. "We must be living right."

"It gets better. Lieutenant Dwight Saunders, it's your turn. Stand up. We also got the top Raptor pilot. Congratulations, Flat Top."

Saunders was sitting in front of Kara and stood. He glanced back at her and she gave him a thumb's up.

"Now it's Lieutenant Edmondson's turn. She came in a close second in the Raptor group. Take a bow, Racetrack."

Maggie stood and briefly waved before she sat.

Suddenly Captain Taylor came to attention. "Commander on deck," he said. "Attention."

They all stood immediately and snapped to attention.

Commander Cain walked down the aisle of the ready room followed by a taller, balding man that Kara knew had to be Saul Tigh, the ship's XO. When they reached the front of the group, they turned. Tigh stepped two paces back and Captain Cole surrendered the podium to the commander.

"As you were. Please be seated."

Kara and the rest of the pilots sat.

"I always like to address the first briefing of my nuggets. For those of you who don't already know, I am Helena Cain, Commander of this battlestar. The man to my right is Colonel Saul Tigh, my Executive Officer. As you all know, you're here to learn to fly Vipers and Raptors in deep space and to learn the discipline that comes from living on a battlestar. We intend to see that you learn it."

The whole time Cain was talking, Kara was aware that Tigh's gaze moved over the pilots but kept coming back to her. She wondered how long it would be until he asked to see her and expected some answers to relay to Admiral Adama. She already dreaded it. She knew from her father and Laura that Tigh was fond of his whiskey. She had no idea if she would find him drunk or sober when their conversation took place. She would have to find a way to talk to Sharon privately soon. She had to find out the number of that post office box and when Sharon intended to send her first letter to Cavil or Uncle Joe. Also what Sharon was going to say.

At first it seemed simplistic to Kara and chancy that Cavil would have Sharon use the mail system to communicate information to him and yet the more she thought about it, the smarter it seemed. The Colonials would probably be expecting something sophisticated and electronic from the Cylons, not a letter. Maybe Cavil was smarter than Kara gave him credit for being.

Cain's gaze fell on her and then it moved on. "Last but not least, I would like for our XO to explain the pictures to you that hang on either side of the ready room exit."

Kara started to turn and look and then changed her mind. She would see the pictures on the way out.

Cain stepped aside from the podium and Tigh stepped up. "On the right side of the door is one that was transmitted to the Caprica News Bureau by an unknown photographer on Aerilon as that city was being bombed. It is a wounded soldier on his knees taken on the roof of their capitol building moments before its destruction. We've all started calling it Lest We Forget. I don't think I need to explain it or say anything else about it. Pilots touch it on their way out as a sign of respect for all the good men and women who gave their lives in service to the Colonies."

Kara realized that some of the pilots were turning around, craning their necks to see it, but she had already seen the picture. Laura had a copy of it on the wall of her office. She called it Never Forget.

Tigh continued. "The picture on the left side of the door is of a transport ship just as it took off with supplies for the refugee camps. We owe Presidential candidate Laura Roslin and Admiral William Adama for that picture. It's called Hope. We touch it for luck."

Kara had seen that picture many times. It also hung on the wall of Laura's office, both at work and in her small office at home. Her father kept a copy of it on his laptop. It had always been one of Kara's favorite pictures. She hadn't been in the refugee camp when that photograph had been taken, but the food and supplies on that ship and the other two that had accompanied it had saved countless lives.

Cain stepped back up to the podium. "Good hunting, everyone." She and Tigh walked back up the aisle as Captain Taylor walked over to the dry erase board and turned it over.

"Here are your assignments. Check the board. The experienced pilot will orient you. Raptor nuggets will also have an experienced pilot and ECO to fly with them. Nugget ECOs will fly with two experienced pilots. Any questions?"

He paused for a moment. "In that case I'll say dismissed."

Kara looked at the board. She was paired with Louanne Katraine. She was hoping for Hot Dog or Chuckles.

Kat waited while the row emptied. As Kara stood, Kat said, "Ain't I lucky? I get to fly with Star-buck who's not only dating an admiral's son, she's the Viper class Top Gun."

"Back off, Katraine," Kara said. She was in no mood to be picked on about Lee or her flying skills.

"You're still holding out on us Star-buck. I hear your stepmother is Laura Roslin. I hear she's going to be the next Pres-i-dent of the Colonies."

Kara rolled her eyes. She wondered who she had to thank for that bit of information getting to Kat.

She couldn't keep the irritation out of her voice. "Look, I'm here to do a job just like everybody else. I don't expect to be treated any different than you or Hot Dog."

"That's good, nugget. Because you won't be."

"Let's go, then," Kara said.

She was more than ready to get out in a Viper. She was more than ready to show Louanne Katraine and everybody else what she could do. She thought that getting the Top Gun trophy in Flight School would have put an end to doubts about her abilities. Now she had to put up with a loudmouth who made her think of Eammon Pike. She wondered how long it would be until Pike made a move on Kat. She hoped he did. They deserved each other.

On the way out the door, Kara reverently touched the photograph of the soldier on top of Aerilon's capitol building. She thought of her mother. She still had a big score to settle with the Cylons. She wouldn't forget. She would never forget.

...

Lee walked into Zeno's and made his way to the bar. John had saved him a seat.

Lee glanced down. John had what looked like a straight whiskey. Lee signaled the bartender for a beer.

He said, "I went for almost a month without seeing Kara when she was on restriction. It's been three days and I feel like it's been a year."

"I know what you mean. There's something about knowing she's so far away. I miss her, too."

"I've already written her a letter," Lee said. "I didn't have much to tell her. I can't talk about the Sadie mission except in a round-about way. I call it planning a camping trip."

"I've already written her, too. I sent her a picture of Braedon. I think she took one with her, but I sent her one just in case. I show him Kara's picture at night. He's still saying Kawa. I told Kara we'd practice her name." John chucked. "I know you're wondering what happened to the pilot you met on the Galactica five years ago, the one with all the advice about women. I sound like an idiot, don't I?"

"You sound like a father," Lee said.

"Can you talk to me about the mission?"

"There's not much to tell, yet. I got inside Sadie this past Monday. It's a lot harder to fly when you're lying on your stomach."

"I can imagine."

"I practice for two more weeks. Then Sadie is crated and shipped to Heliops Island. As soon as it gets there, I join her and we wait for a thunder storm."

"Do you get to practice taking it up before the actual mission?"

"I think so. I mean these guys keep telling me it will fly, but until I feel it leave the ground, I'm going to have a few doubts."

"You've been studying the maps I created?"

"Every night. I still haven't talked about the final plan with my dad."

"Does it bother you?"

"What?" Lee asked.

"That you'll be helping him decide where to put those nukes on the surface of the planet."

Lee picked up his beer. He couldn't look at John. "It bothers me."

"You volunteered to fly a mission. You've got a job to do. I had a job to do. We can't let our personal feelings get in the way of doing it, but it doesn't mean we have to feel good about it."

"Dad told me that we're not going to be able to go to Nereid right after we defeat the Cylons here. As soon as we do that, he's going to put all our battlestars around Caprica to protect it. Then he'll get the arsenal of nuclear weapons inventoried and ready to go at the same time a few battlestars will get some major repairs. He's thinking at least four months, maybe six between the time we fight them here and when we go to destroy Nereid. If we're lucky, the Cylons on Nereid won't have a clue that we know about them. They'll think they're safe there."

"I guess a lot depends on what you find when you jump Sadie. Hell, who knows? The place might be deserted. The Cylons could have abandoned Nereid and moved on to Kobol or another planet. Hugh Connelly has spent a lot of time studying the photographs he took of the Altar of Zeus. He thinks part of it may be a star map to Kobol. If the Cylons have explored Nereid, they probably found something similar, something Irina Hoshi called the Kobol Stone."

"They might have, but I don't think they will have completely abandoned Nereid. Maybe some of them have moved on, but I think they left at least a small group there."

John sipped his drink. "That's what you're going to find out for us."

"Are you and Laura okay now?"

John shrugged. "I know how she feels about Nereid. She knows how I feel. We don't talk about it. Otherwise we're fine."

"She does know where you are tonight, doesn't she?"

"I called her before I left the Academy and told her I was meeting you for a drink. She's at her campaign headquarters. Maya is keeping Braedon. She doesn't have a date with Anders tonight."

"Sam and the team have started pyramid practice again. The season starts soon. He won't have near as much time as he had."

"It is that time of the year, isn't it? Where has the time gone?"

"How are things going at the Academy?"

"It's too soon to tell. Kara's class was exceptional. There were a lot of motivated kids in her class."

"Maybe because a lot of them came from the camps."

They drank in silence for a few minutes. Lee watched the news on the television above the bar. The sound was off but the closed captioning was on. Except for some transport accidents, it was another uneventful day in Caprica City. There were three more deaths in Sovana related to rival drug dealers.

"Sovana is falling apart," Lee said.

"Cavil loves it. He thinks it proves the Cylons are superior to humans."

"I know," Lee said. "I've had to listen to all of his speeches lately. I think he's losing it. He said something in his last speech about humans no longer being God's chosen race implying that the Cylons are. He said humans didn't deserve the souls they were given. I thought Cavil was an atheist."

"He is. Or that's what he told Laura at the University the day she almost got herself killed."

"Something is going on with him. I'm sure he's always felt the Cylons were superior to us, at least the skinjobs, but lately he's started to obsess on it in his speeches."

"That's not a comforting thought." John finished his drink. "I guess I'd better go. I want to get home before Maya puts Brae to bed."

Lee finished his beer. "I'm going too."

He and John walked outside. "I'll call you about the weekend," John said. "I think Laura said something about inviting you and Bill for dinner. She knows this is your first weekend in a long time without seeing Kara."

"That would be nice. I'd enjoy seeing you both for dinner. I haven't seen Laura in a while."

John started down the street toward his car and Lee walked in the opposite direction toward his apartment. He was almost there when a street person approached him, a skinny kid with greasy hair almost to his shoulders and a scruffy beard. Lee started to wave him off when he thought about Kara and the camp. He pulled a five-cubit note from his pocket and put it in the young man's hand as he passed.

"Only five, Lee. You can't spare but five?"

Lee whirled. "Do I know you?"

The kid snickered. "We met in Sovana."

"Neil?" Lee said, the shock clear in his voice. "Is that you?"

The young man snorted. "Have I changed that much in two years? Maybe it's because my nose isn't swollen. Or is it because I'm not wearing prisoner orange?"

"Lords of Kobol. You're skin and bones. When was the last time you had something to eat?"

"This morning. I found a doughnut…part of a doughnut…that somebody had thrown on top of a trashcan. The flies hadn't been on it too long."

"Let's go up to my apartment. I'll fix you something to eat."

When they entered the elevator, Lee tried not to wrinkle his nose. "When was the last time you had a bath?"

Neil started laughing. "Weeks. Maybe longer. I don't remember. Conditions where they were keeping me were primitive. No hot water. It didn't encourage daily bathing."

"Where who was keeping you?"

"I'd been laying low in Sovana, staying with a friend and only going out to visit the internet cafés to post my blogs. I screwed up one day and wandered too far into the wrong part of the city. I ran into some old buddies. They insisted I go with them to a camp in the mountains outside Sovana. I'm lucky they didn't kill me and dump me beside the road."

The elevator door opened and they got off. Lee unlocked the door to his apartment.

"Nice," Neil said. "I figured you'd have a nice place."

"I'll fix something to eat. First for you is a shower."

"Whatever you say," Neil said. He stripped off his filthy t-shirt before Lee closed the bathroom door. Lee could see his ribs.

Lee found a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt for Neil and put them on the edge of the sink before he went to the kitchen. He opened another beer. Now that he had Neil here, he wasn't sure what to do after he fed him. He heated some cream of potato soup and made four ham and cheese sandwiches.

Neil came into the kitchen wearing the clean jeans and t-shirt. The jeans were too big in the waist and Neil was holding them up. Lee went back to his closet and found a belt.

When he got back to the kitchen, he saw that Neil hadn't bothered with the spoon. He was drinking the soup from the bowl. Lee let him eat two sandwiches before he spoke again. Neil took Lee's beer.

"How did you get to Caprica City?" Lee finally asked.

"Hitched mostly."

"How'd you find me?"

"Internet café. Your mobile phone is registered. I got your address."

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to tell you about their plans."

"What plans?"

"The guys in the mountain camp. Everybody thinks they're just smugglers. They are, but they're hard-line Resistance. They're going to blow up the big voting places here in Caprica City on Election Day. One truck full of explosives is already here. The other two are coming soon, a couple of weeks apart."

"Lord of Kobol!" Lee said. "They're taking a big chance transporting explosives a thousand miles by truck. Why here? Why not Sovana?"

Neil snorted. "Because nobody gives a rat's ass what happens in Sovana anymore. The Resistance could blow up the whole frakking city and nobody would care. That creepy Cavil would probably pin medals on them. More proof of our inferiority and depravity. I think that's the word he likes to use to describe humans, at least the ones in Sovana."

"Is this directed at Laura Roslin or one of the other candidates?"

"At all of them. Don't you understand? These guys think that anybody running for office is cooperating with the Cylons."

"I need specifics," Lee said.

"I figured you would. But you need to wait to do anything until the other two trucks get here. Otherwise they'll just change their plans. It's taken them almost two years to put together these explosives. If you get all three shipments, you'll be safe for a while."

Lee went to the living room and got a spiral notebook from the bookcase. He brought it and a pen back to Neil. "Write down everything you remember."

"What if I tell you and you write it down? You've read my blog. My spelling isn't so hot."

Twenty minutes later Lee had written down everything that Neil could remember about the shipments of explosives to Caprica City and the men involved. He had a few names but he was sure they were aliases. In most cases Neil knew only first names or nicknames.

"That's all you can remember?"

"That's it," Neil said. "I couldn't take their hideout any longer. It was cold and the food sucked and I was sick of sleeping on a blanket on the ground in a cold cave. I told you. These guys are hard-line and dedicated, but they all got nice cots. I slept on the ground like one of their frakking dogs, but they fed the damned dogs a lot better than they fed me. I think they were starting to get suspicious because I was always hanging around the guys who were doing the planning. So ten days ago I hid in the back of the truck carrying the explosives."

"You rode all the way to Caprica City in the back of a truck carrying explosives?"

"No, man. I only rode about forty miles. When they slowed down to make the turn onto a secondary road, I bailed. I knew as soon as they found out I was gone, they'd call and have the guys check that truck. They would have shot me on the spot."

"Then how did you get here?"

"Cut through the country for about thirty miles to another road and then hitched."

"Damn, Neil."

He shrugged. "Thanks for the clean clothes and the shower and the food. I'll be going now."

"Wait a minute. Where are you going?"

"I lived on the street in Sovana for a while. It's not so bad. At least it's warmer here."

"You can stay at my place tonight. Tomorrow I can help you get…"

"No thanks, man. You were nice to me in Sovana. I'm returning the favor, but no way I'd trust you not to make a phone call while I'm sleeping. I'm not going to prison."

"Neil…"

"No, Lee. Maybe I'll see you around sometime."

"Wait. I've got a few cubits tucked away. Let me…"

Neil smiled for the first time. "You gave me five, but okay, you want to give me more, go get it."

Lee walked back to his bedroom and got fifty cubits from his dresser. As he closed the drawer, he looked up at Posiden's Daughter and thought of Kara. She would approve.

When he walked back into the kitchen, though, Neil was gone as were the other two ham and cheese sandwiches. Lee hadn't even heard the apartment door open and close. He rushed to the door, jerked it open and looked into the hall. There was no one there. He ran back in and got his keys and rode the elevator down to the street. He looked up and down. Neil was nowhere in sight.

Slowly and sadly Lee walked back into the building and rode the elevator upstairs. Once inside his apartment, he found his phone and called Major Parker at home.

Lee looked at his watch as the phone rang. It wasn't quite nine o'clock. When Parker answered, he said, "I apologize for calling you at night, sir, but I've got some information that I don't think should wait."

Parker met him in the city at Special Agent Darren's office. The worst part for Lee was explaining to them how he had let Neil Speigel get away. The best part was the amount of information he had written on the front and back of one piece of notebook paper.

As Lee and Major Parker walked out into the early morning, Lee glanced at his watch. It was 02:20.

Parker said, "Good job, Lee. I mean it."

"I let him get away, sir. I turned my back on him and he got away."

"We all make mistakes. Don't be too hard on yourself."

"It was a stupid, amateur mistake."

"Tell me something. Did you really want to bring him in?"

Lee hesitated and then told the truth. "No, sir. He's had a tough life. I wanted to help him. He doesn't belong in prison. He's just a kid who was abused in the refugee camp and has been abused by almost everyone he's known since."

"Which is why he turned to you. You're probably the only one since the camp who hasn't tried to take advantage of him, who tried to help him so maybe things worked out for the best. You probably got everything he knows anyway. That information will save a lot of lives."

"I hope so, sir. What happens now?"

"Darren and his task force will take it from here. I don't expect to see you bright and early in the morning either. Take your time getting in."

Back at his apartment, Lee went to the bathroom and picked up Neil's dirty, ragged clothes from the floor. He searched the pockets, coming up empty, which didn't surprise him. He put the clothes in a garbage bag and tied it, took it into the hall and dropped it down the garbage chute.

He knew he should be sleepy but he wasn't. He got a beer from the refrigerator, put on Dreilide Thrace's CD, sat on the couch and tried to unwind. He wondered what Kara was doing now. He hoped by Friday he'd have a letter from her.

He leaned his head back against the couch and thought of Neil again. In a few days or a week, he'd check Neil's blog. He bet this time he would find a new entry. He hoped Neil Speigle aka Martin Spiller soon found a new home.

...

Kara sat in her Viper in a launch tube of the Galactica. Kat had just launched. Kara was ten seconds behind her.

She remembered to put her head back against the headrest before the catapult engaged. As her Viper was flung into space, the rush was like nothing she had ever felt before. She was finally in deep space. The stars around her were set in black velvet. Their own sun was half as big as it was from the surface of Caprica.

Kat's voice broke into her feeling of awe. "Pay attention, nugget."

"I'll bet you never read Kataris," Kara said sarcastically.

"Who's that?"

"A poet," Kara said.

Kat snickered. "Is that how you got to be a Top Gun? Reading poetry?"

Kara started to retort and then stopped herself. She had walked into that one. Best to let it go.

The training exercise was easy, a few simple maneuvers. She had worked harder on her first flight back on Caprica.

Their bird dog Raider left them as she started her landing procedure. It was smooth and uneventful. Back on deck she waited for Kat whose landing wasn't quite as smooth.

"Not bad for a nugget," Kat smirked when she got out of her Viper.

"Not bad? It was damned near perfect."

"Dream on, nugget. You'll have to do a couple more flights with me before I'll say you're ready to go it alone out there. And you need to work on your landings."

"What?" Kara said in shock. "I could have flown that little exercise with my eyes closed. And my landing was a lot better than yours."

"Oh, yeah? Says who?"

"Says me," Kara said angrily. "Ask the LSO. He saw you bouncing all over the landing bay. Another foot higher and you'd have missed the trap altogether."

Kat got in her face and Kara realized for the first time that there was something a little bit off about Kat's eyes. The pupils were too dilated. She knew then what was wrong.

"You're on stims, aren't you? I used to see it at the Academy. Somebody wanted to stay up all night and study for a test. No problem. Pop a few stims."

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about," Kat said angrily.

Kara turned to walk away and Kat grabbed her arm.

"Back off, Katraine," Kara said. "I know your secret."

Several of the deck crew had stopped what they were doing and were watching them. Kat seemed finally to realize they had an audience. Without a word she turned, crossed the hangar and ascended the steps at a fast pace.

"Your post-flight check list, sir," a young crewman said to Kara.

Kara took it without a word. So the Galactica's Top Gun was a stim junkie. That's what it took to maintain her edge. Kara began to look forward to taking the Top Gun title from her.

She completed the post-flight list and handed the clipboard back to the crewman. Galen Tyrol was standing close behind her when she turned.

"Welcome aboard, sir."

"Hey, Chief. I never thought I'd see you a million miles from Caprica."

"I never thought I'd see you in a Viper."

"You must not have talked to Jack Fisk lately."

"No. I should have stayed in touch. Jack's a nice guy."

"Yes, he is. I went to see him before I left. He's doing fine."

"Chief," a young female crewman called.

Tyrol turned. "Coming Cally." He turned back to Kara. "Duty calls. Good to see you again."

"Same here."

Kara was on her way back to her quarters when she heard her name come over the ship's intercom system. Lieutenant Kara Thrace, report to the XO's quarters. The message repeated several times.

She had to ask twice before she found Saul Tigh's quarters.

She knocked. "Lieutenant Kara Thrace reporting as ordered, sir."

Tigh closed the door behind her. "Well, well. Starbuck."

"Yes, sir." Kara thought she smelled alcohol, but there was none in evidence anywhere. Maybe it was her imagination and maybe he had just drunk so much that his quarters had a permanent reek of it.

"I hear your father was called Starbuck, too."

"Yes, sir."

"He's one cocky son of a bitch who doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut. I don't know why Bill thinks so much of him, but he does."

Kara almost bit her tongue. "Is there a reason you called me here, sir?"

"You know damned well why I called you here. You've got information for me to pass back to Bill. I'll never understand why he didn't just put that Cylon in the brig and be done with it. I don't know why he didn't put you and your father both in the brig months ago when you wouldn't tell him who she was."

"Admiral Adama trusts me and my father. Lee does, too."

"Lee Adama is still wet behind the ears. It's not Lee's advice that Bill should be taking. Or your father's either."

Kara felt her blood pressure begin to rise and almost bit her tongue again. She knew she had to get out of there or she was going to say something that would get her in big trouble. Saul Tigh would probably love to throw her in the brig right now if for no other reason than to get back at her father.

"The Cylon has a post office box. She's supposed to write letters."

Saul Tigh snorted. "You expect me to believe that? The Cylon is going to write Cavil letters?"

"That's what she told me."

"You're going to have to do better than that."

"That's all I've got so far. I'll find out more in a day or two."

"You'd better."

"Will that be all, sir?"

He waved in the direction of the door. "Dismissed."

Ten minutes later as Kara stood in the shower letting the warm water beat down on her, she wished she were back on Caprica and in Lee's arms. That was about the only thing that could make her feel better right now.

In the mess hall, she took her tray and sat down at the table with Karl and Sharon.

"I need that post office box number," Kara said.

Sharon told her without hesitation and then asked, "What else do you need to know?"

"When are you sending Uncle Joe your first letter?"

"In a week. I'll let you read it before I send it."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"That I've found a lot of drug and alcohol use, that nobody takes his or her job seriously and that the pilots are demoralized by how much better the Raiders are."

"That's a lie," Kara said.

Sharon smiled. "I know. But it's what Cavil wants to hear. He'll never believe I would lie to him."

"Happy now?" Karl asked Kara sarcastically.

"Don't you give me grief, too," Kara said. "I've had about all the frakking grief I can take today."

Sharon elbowed Karl. "Don't say anything to her about this. I'm here. Just remember who we owe for that. Just remember where I could be."

Karl looked at Kara. She held his gaze. They had been through too much together to let this come between them. Karl knew it. Slowly he smiled at her and nodded. Just like when they had gone back to the camp, he didn't have to say a thing. He loved her and trusted her. She could see it in his eyes.

...

The last Saturday in September Lee stood in the predawn light at the airfield waiting for John to arrive. He knew he was half an hour early, but he'd been able to sleep only a few hours the night before. At dinner on Saturday night, two weeks previously, John had volunteered to fly Lee to Heliops Island. The pretense for the trip, and what Lee had told his fellow interrogators, was that he was taking a couple of weeks to go camping on an island. They all knew his girlfriend was on a battlestar. No one questioned the vacation. Major Parker knew only that Lee was undertaking a mission for the admiral. He didn't know any of the details.

The air was cool and Lee stuck his hands in his windbreaker pockets. True to his cover story, he had a duffel bag and a large backpack. He finally saw John come striding out of the terminal building, a cup of coffee in one hand and his flight case in the other.

"Been waiting long?" John asked.

"Twenty minutes," Lee said. "I was early."

Together they stowed Lee's gear.

"It's going to be a good day for flying," John said.

The sun was almost to the horizon. The sky was beautiful hues of pink and gold.

Lee said. "Too bad when I take Sadie up it will be in the middle of a storm."

Inside the ship Lee settled into the copilot's seat while John stowed his flight case with his charts and maps. He slid into the pilot's seat and adjusted his headset. Lee slipped the other one on and half listened while John went through his preflight check and then got clearance to takeoff.

The flying time to Heliops was only about forty minutes longer than it was to Mykos where John had his cottage, where he had been with Kara just three weekends earlier.

When they were at their cruising altitude and John had set the ship on autopilot, Lee said, "I talked to Kara ship-to-shore last night or tried to, but the connection was terrible because of some solar flares. We could barely hear each other. We gave up after five minutes."

"I haven't tried to call her. I know she only gets one call per week and I know she'd rather talk to you."

"Call her this week, will you, since I can't?"

"I've gotten two letters from her. They were short. She said she was doing fine. She said she was adjusting. Maybe I'm trying to read something into it, but it didn't sound quite like her. I hope Tigh isn't giving her a hard time. He doesn't like me and I don't care for him. I know your dad trusts the colonel, but he spends too much time with his bottle and he disagrees with how Bill is handling the Sharon thing."

Lee knew what John meant. He, too, hoped he wasn't reading something between the lines, but Kara's letters weren't like the ones she had written him from the Academy when she had been on restriction. The tone wasn't nearly as light. He hoped that Kara hadn't tangled with Tigh who seemed to have concentrated his wife-related issues into a hatred of the Cylons. It was a lot easier to cultivate a bitter hatred of the Cylons that it was for Tigh to deal with his domestic problems.

"Kara will be fine," Lee finally said. "She's missing everybody, but she's fine. I wrote her earlier this week about my camping trip. She'll know what I'm talking about. I told her that until I get back, I won't be able to get a letter out to her. I don't think there will be any mail pickup at an abandoned hangar."

"You're right about that. The hangar is seventy-five miles from the nearest village. About half that distance to a sheep farm. How many crewmen are going to be there with you?"

"Two. Rafferty's chief computer technician, Kevin Abinell, and a mechanic to fuel the Raider and pull it in and out of the hangar. And me. I hope they know how to play triad. I brought a few paperbacks but I won't want to read all the time."

"I've been watching the weather," John said. "There's a storm front forming a thousand miles to the northeast of Heliops. Cooler air should be moving over the island before the end of the week. You may just get your chance before the weekend."

Lee sighed. "I'm ready to fly this mission and get back home. I'm ready to be done with it. I'm ready to see what we're going to have to deal with on Nereid."

"You'll let me know when you're ready to come back to Caprica City."

"I've got a satellite phone since there's no mobile tower on Heliops," Lee said.

"Bill thought of everything."

Lee finally smiled. "He had to. You're the one who picked an abandoned hangar on the coast of an island in the middle of nowhere for us to launch this mission."

"Can you think of another place that would be completely off the Cylon's dradis?"

"Only until I jump Sadie. Their dradis will pick up the jump."

John grinned. "No, their dradis will pick up a lightning strike, a number of them from the looks of the weather that's on its way."

...

Thursday morning when Lee awoke and walked outside of the hangar, he knew that this was the day. The sky was ablaze with orange and purple clouds and the breeze had changed. It was colder and coming from the north. The clash with the warmer, wet air of the island should produce a storm, a big one.

The four days since John had dropped him there on Saturday had passed quicker than he had thought they would. Kevin Abinell had come prepared. He had brought a laptop loaded with games and two controllers. And a backpack filled with batteries since there was no electricity at the hangar.

The mechanic, who introduced himself only as Lou, spent most of his time during the day reading or playing games of solitaire. At night they all played triad by the light of a single lantern.

Sunday afternoon at dusk, the mechanic had hooked the Raider up to a tow and pulled it out on the runway. He had fueled it and Lee and had put on his flight suit and had climbed inside. Kevin had closed the hatch and Lee had sealed it from the inside. He had started the oxygen flowing and had tried to ignore the responses his body was sending him. In his Viper he was at least able to see everything outside the canopy. In Sadie with the hatch closed, he had felt like he was closed into a very small tin can.

He had swallowed hard and taken a few deep breaths and looked at his little screen. He had adjusted the small headset. He had seen the empty runway ahead of him in the waning light. Carefully and slowly he had engaged the ship's vertical thrusters. He had hovered ten and then twenty feet above the runway. He had moved the joystick forward like he had done back at the boneyard many times. Sadie had flown, just like Kevin and Rick had promised she would.

He had repeated the exercise every day at dusk since then, growing bolder and flying farther each time until he now felt confident that he had mastered flying the Raider instead of a sim. He had the jump coordinates written on a piece of paper that was stuck to the floor beside him. There were three, the first jump into the outer quadrant of the Prolmar Sector where he would take long-range sensor readings. He would execute the second jump only if the surface of Nereid was clear. The third set of coordinates was eight thousand feet above Heliops Island. When he keyed in that set of coordinates, he would be on his way home.

Kevin walked up beside him in the dawn light. "You're thinking it will be today."

"Yeah," Lee said.

"I think you're right. A storm's on the way. I just saw it on my laptop's weather app. It's a big one."

They heard the first distant rumble of thunder just after four that afternoon. Lee was already pacing the hangar in his flight suit.

"Don't start the homing beacon until you've jumped," Abinell said. "You don't want the Cylons here on Caprica to pick it up. Leave the communicator off, too, until you get back."

"Right," Lee said.

The mechanic was standing in the doorway of the hangar wearing a hooded rain slicker. Sadie was hooked to the tow.

"Rain's starting," Lou said. "I can see the lightning now."

Kevin held out his hand. "Good luck, Lee."

Lee shook hands with him. "Thanks."

He climbed up in the Raider and Kevin closed the hatch. Lee sealed it and started the oxygen flowing. That morning they had put new tanks into the Raider. He had two hours of oxygen. Lee felt Sadie begin to move as the mechanic towed it out onto the runway, already slick now with rain. The tow disengaged. He gave the mechanic five minutes to get back into the hangar before he lifted Sadie from the runway and banked northeast over the rocky cliffs and into the storm.

The first jump coordinates were already keyed into the computer. When he saw a jagged flash of lightning on his monitor, he jumped.

Lee had never been aboard a ship that had jumped through space before. John had tried to describe the feeling to him. He had told Lee that not everybody felt the same way, that some people hated the feeling, that it made some feel momentarily dizzy and disoriented, even a little nauseous. He had told Lee to breathe through it and not to think about it.

John knew Lee's tendency to over-think, to want to understand exactly what was happening as the FTL drive bent space and created a passage that some called a wormhole. Now Lee tried to take John's advice, to breathe and not to think.

The sensation was one that he would later have a hard time describing, the feeling of hovering on the edge of a chasm and then falling horizontally as time seemed to momentarily stop and space folded in on itself. One second he was flying into a raging thunderstorm and the next he was gliding silently through deep space.

He took a few moments to orient himself. He was definitely in another sector of space. His long-range sensors showed nothing except a planet hundreds of thousands of miles in the distance and far beyond that, the system's sun, brighter than a star, but still too faint to sustain life this far out. The planet nearest to him was a gas giant, an asteroid vacuum as Kevin had called it. Lee keyed in the second set of coordinates and hoped Felix Gaeta hadn't made a mistake.

A moment later he materialized over Nereid. He immediately looked at his sensors. There was something on the other side of the planet. The signal was Cylon. Basestars. Two of them. He switched on the Raider's homing beacon and dove for the surface. All he wanted to do was complete his mission and jump home.

Sadie entered the atmosphere with the ease of a sharp knife. There was still no indication that the basestars were aware of his presence. He was over ice, a vast field of ice as far as he could see in the small monitor. Irina Hoshi's journal had indicated that the north and south poles of the planet were permanently frozen. He turned on the cameras just in case there was something below him that was important. He turned north toward the equator and flew as fast as Sadie would go. For almost twenty minutes he saw nothing but ice and then a vast ocean. He was beginning to wonder if he would have anything to show for his mission when he saw the outline of mountains on the monitors.

He slowed down minimally. The peaks flashed beneath the Raider and then he was over a forest that stretched as far as he could see. The forest ended and he was over a plain. He picked up something electrical on his sensors, saw a river and continued. He looked at his time. He had forty minutes of oxygen left before he went into his reserve.

He followed the river northwest and finally saw the ruins of the ancient city. He flew the grid that he and his father had talked about. Beyond the city was another forest, then more mountains and more snow. He turned around and followed the river back to the high plateau. This time he saw what he had missed before, buildings, low and sand colored, and then he was past them. He looked at his time. Fifteen minutes of oxygen left before he would be into his half-hour reserve. He turned and made one more pass back to the ruined city.

Six minutes. He keyed in the coordinates for Caprica. Just as he reached the mountains, he turned off the homing beacon and jumped. Two minutes. Space bent. He thought he saw a meteor, a falling star. He made his wish.

This time he was dizzy. His vision blurred and he shook his head, his eyesight finally clearing. Traveling thirty light years in seconds was bound to do something to the human body.

The monitor was dark gray for ten seconds before he realized that he had jumped back into the middle of the storm. Then there was a brilliant white flash that nearly blinded him at the same instant that a percussive wave slammed into the ship. The screens all flickered and went dark. The silence was so sudden that he thought for a moment he was deaf. The blackness inside of the ship was so total that he thought he had been blinded as well. And then he realized what had happened. He had lost his computers.

He struggled to get his breath. Gods, to make it back to Caprica only to die like this. He thought of Kara and wondered who would tell her. Would it be John or his father or Commander Cain? He heard a faint hum. His hearing was coming back. There was a tiny flicker of green as the computers began coming back on line. Relief flooded him. If he made it down alive, he would have to thank Kevin for the redundancy he and Rick had built into Sadie's systems.

The camera monitors came back up. The cameras were still recording but all Lee saw was gray. He had dropped several thousand feet in altitude, but he didn't know whether he was over the island or the ocean. He continued his descent to four thousand feet. No better. He could feel the wind buffeting the Raider despite the aerodynamic shape. Three thousand feet. He dropped lower, two thousand feet and then fifteen hundred.

He was now ten minutes into his last half hour of his oxygen reserve. He chided himself. He should never have taken that last pass over the ruined city. Then he realized that now was not the time to think about it. He had to get Sadie on the ground fast. At a hundred feet he finally dropped out of the raincloud. He was over the ocean. He guessed that he was east of the island. He turned Sadie due west and flew as fast as he dared. The oxygen needle bumped the side of the gauge. The inside of the Raider grew stuffy. All he could hope now was that he reached land before he blacked out.

...

The call came at nine o'clock Thursday evening. Laura saw John pick up his mobile phone and could tell immediately that something was wrong.

She heard him say, "What do you mean you think he made it back?" He listened for another thirty seconds and then said, "I'll be by to get you. Fifteen minutes. We can be there in less than three hours."

"What?" She asked.

"That was Bill. Lee flew the mission today. They think he made it back. Their dradis picked up what was probably his jump into the atmosphere. They couldn't pinpoint it exactly because there was so much lightning in the storm. That was a little after six this evening. Lee never made it back to the airstrip on Heliops."

"Oh, gods," Laura said. "What does Bill think happened?"

"He doesn't know or he won't say. I'm flying him down there tonight. He'll make a decision about search and rescue after he gets there."

"He asked you to…"

"I volunteered. Bill can't take a Raptor because the Cylons will be all over him. A commercial charter will take hours to arrange. Bill and I can be in the air in less than an hour. I'll call Conrad on the way to the airfield and ask him to cover my sim sessions tomorrow."

John was as upset as Laura had ever seen him. She followed him to their bedroom where he took off his sweatpants and put on a pair of khakis. He began buttoning a shirt over his t-shirt. He pulled a windbreaker out of the closet.

"What can I do?" She asked him.

He picked up his keys from the dresser. "Pray, Laura. Just pray that Lee is okay."

She looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Bill will never get over it if Lee…"

"No, he won't. I won't either. I'm the one who told Bill about Kara's idea to jump the Raider to Nereid. It was my idea to do it in the middle of a storm, too."

"But you said that was the only way to mask an FTL jump from the Cylons. You said…"

"That doesn't make me feel any better right now."

She walked with him to the door and put her arms around him. He held her tightly for a moment before he kissed her forehead, and then he was gone.

She didn't realize that she was shaking until she walked back into the den. She started to get a drink and then changed her mind and walked to the nursery instead. She looked at her sleeping son and touched his silky hair as she had done hundreds of times before.

No, a parent would never get over losing a child.