A/N: I have no idea what exactly a Vulcan wedding/bonding ceremony includes. I have seen a picture of it from ST: Enterprise, and I've seen Amok Time from TOS two or three times, but there's still not enough information. So I combined what I saw in the picture and in TOS, and added a few elements of my own.

Chapter 19: Amending

Nyota wasn't quite sure how she managed to get through the next four days.

She and Spock tried their best to avoid being alone. After their activities in the hover-car, both knew that they wouldn't be able to restrain themselves much longer. Occasionally, when Nyota opened the link unexpectedly (as he had firmly told her before that she did not need to ask his permission, even though he always asked her) she would find him thinking about that secret rendezvous. She was amused to find just how much he had enjoyed it...and how much he wanted her to do it again, this time to completion.

They still weren't entirely innocent. When no one was looking, there were subtle touches. His hand would graze against her breast, or hers would brush against the crotch of his pants. Nothing too dangerous for either of them...but each touch ignited flames in her lower belly, and she began to think more and more about the cave that awaited them. Seven whole days, just the two of them, no interruptions....she shivered in anticipation. She decided that there were certain Vulcan customs that she liked very much.

Even being in the same room with him was difficult- but having him in her head was much worse. Both of them burned for one another- and when their minds connected, desire, arousal, and need engulfed them. It became too much, so they kept the bond closed most of the time.

It was ridiculous. It hadn't been that long since they had last had sex...only a week. Then again, ever since their bonding they had become accustomed to a very active sex life...and even before the bonding, they had sex at least five or six times a week, which was more than most married couples. So a week to them was more like a month or even two to other couples.

She didn't want to admit that they may be addicts...but was there really anything wrong with that?

Nyota sat on her bed as she thought about these things. She sensed a presence standing just outside her field of peripheral vision, and looked up. Spock stood there in the open doorway, watching her. She smiled and stood.

"What do you want?" she asked. The sun was going down now, casting most of the room into shadow. She turned back to the half-packed bag that sat on her bed. The ceremony was the next afternoon...and after that little ritual was completed, they would be escorted to the cave, which was being prepared even at that moment for their arrival.

"I believe you know what I want." Spock said, his voice low, suggestive. Nyota smiled to herself and shook her head.

"Tomorrow, k'diwa." she said, and Spock came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her.

"Tomorrow." he agreed, and kissed the place behind her left ear. She sighed and leaned her head back against him, placing her hands over his where they rested on her stomach.

"Where is your father and T'Shan?" she asked, eyes slipping closed.

"T'Shan is preparing dinner. My father is speaking to Elder Spock on the comm." Spock replied. Nyota nodded. This was the way it had been...when everyone else was busy, they stole a few moments for themselves.

Spock moved his head so that his cheek pressed against hers, and he inhaled deeply as he opened the link. She knew that he was scenting her...she had learned since bonding with him that he liked her natural scent.

"I am Vulcan. I do not 'like' anything. Like implies emotional attachment." Spock said, turning his head to press several light kisses to her jaw.

"You 'like' me, don't you?" she asked teasingly.

"I can find certain things to be pleasing." Spock said. "Pleasing does not necessarily connote emotional attachment."

"Oh, really?" she asked, with a soft laugh. "Give me an example."

"Very well..." Spock said, and both of his hands moved up to cup her breasts, his thumbs moving over the hardening nipples. They tingled with tiny bolts of electricity, which shot directly to her core. She gave a very quiet groan. "This is physically pleasing to you, as well as to me." he said, and pressed the evidence against her behind. She laughed again.

"Are you saying that you only like me for my body? I would expect that from Jim Kirk, but not from you." she said, still smiling.

"I did not say that you only physically please me. I said to be 'pleased' does not necessarily connote emotional attachment." Spock said, now gently kneading her breasts. Her nipples were now straining against the fabric of the gray gown she wore. He began to slowly rub himself against her, as well...she could feel his lok hardening and growing even more.

"I thought we were done with this sort of teasing." Nyota said, her breath catching in her throat.

"Tomorrow all teasing will be over." Spock said, and he released her breasts, stepping away from her. She immediately missed his warmth. She turned to face him.

"You know, I'm seeing a whole new side to you. I never realized just how much you like sex." she said. He did not reply to that comment...instead, he moved close to her once again, capturing her lips in a warm kiss. Then he leaned his forehead against hers.

"I suggest that you get a minimum of eight hours of sleep tonight, my adun'a. You will need it." he said, and then he kissed her one last time, her lips tingling when he pulled away again. He gave her one last, heated look, and then left.

Her legs were trembling, and she had to sit down to compose herself. A week of teasing, of almost-fulfillment, was too much. She needed him, badly.

____________________________________________________________

It was after dinner, and Spock had retired to his room for his evening meditation. Sarek was in the living room, looking over the most recent financial reports...Nyota was reading from the data PADD she had borrowed from Spock.

She was just setting it aside when T'Shan came in quietly, carrying a package.

"T'Lang has sent this. It is the gown you will wear tomorrow." T'Shan said, as Nyota stood to take it.

"Thank you." She had met with the Vulcan seamstress two days before to be fitted for the gown. She hung it up in the closet, and turned to find that T'Shan was still watching her. "Is there something else?" Nyota asked.

"There is something I must discuss with you." T'Shan said. Nyota's brow furrowed in confusion.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I knew Lady Amanda for many years. I know things about her that many others do not know- including osu Spock. If she were here, she would tell you of the things I mean to tell you. She would think of it as her duty."

"Please continue." Nyota said, gesturing toward the bed, but T'Shan did not move.

"I am aware that you are already bonded to Spock. I cannot change that. But there are things about Vulcans that you do not yet know. Things you will not like- things that may even be detrimental to your health."

Nyota sank onto the bed herself, now, and stared at the Vulcan woman before her. What was T'Shan going on about? she wondered.

"There is a cycle that Vulcan males enter once every seven years of their adult life." T'Shan said. "I am sure Spock has not told you of it. No one speaks of it- it is highly embarrassing. I should not even tell you of it, but if I do not, no one will.

"This cycle is called Pon Farr. The time of mating. During this time, the Vulcan male loses all control over his emotions, and must succumb to the need to reproduce with his bonded mate, or risk death. Vulcans are three times as strong as humans- that, combined with lack of control, is dangerous. Lady Amanda struggled through Pon Farr three times. There was one instance where she barely survived it.

"There is no guarantee that Spock will go through Pon Farr, due to his human genetics, because he has not yet- most males start it by age twenty-one. But I find it incumbent upon me to warn you. Lady Amanda was not told until it was too late- she did not know what was wrong with osu Sarek, and she nearly lost her life.

"Lady Amanda once told me that she would have thought twice about bonding with him if she had known it could be so dangerous. But that may have only been because she was in great pain at the time, which could have clouded her mind.

"Divulging this information- while it may not protect you from harm- will allow you to be aware of what is happening should Spock undergo his Time. I have seen what pain it brought my mistress- both mental and physical. Perhaps I can spare you, the wife of her only son."

T'Shan fell silent, her eyes staring hard at the woman sitting on the bed. Nyota stared back- knowing that T'Shan could not be lying. Yet...why had Spock kept this from her? Something that could possibly endanger her? She had thought that he shared everything with her...she had thought that he trusted her with his deepest, darkest secrets. It appeared that she was wrong. She was hurt.

"Thank you, T'Shan." Nyota said quietly. There was a pause. "Is that all?"

T'Shan seemed to be appraising her. Then she nodded once. "Yes, Lady Nyota. That is all."

That was the first time that T'Shan had called her anything other than 'Miss Uhura'. It was also the first time that she had spoken to her directly. She wondered if this meant that T'Shan accepted her as a member of the S'chn T'gai house.

T'Shan turned to leave, and then paused to turn back. "I am not an adequate judge of human character, but I believe that Lady Amanda would have approved of you." Then she was gone.

Nyota watched her go, and then looked down at the data PADD she had just been perusing. She tried to get back into the e-book, but couldn't focus on it. She set it aside and drew her knees up to her chest.

This really wasn't the time to worry about this, she knew...like T'Shan had said, there was a likelihood that Spock wouldn't even go through this 'Pon Farr'. But what if he did? From the sounds of it, he could hurt her, maybe even kill her...she shuddered.

She tried to shove it into the back of her mind. She would talk to Spock about it...but not now, or anytime soon. She would wait until after they left New Vulcan. She wanted to be able to enjoy the rest of their time- she didn't want to spoil it by bringing that up. She was sure that he had a reason for not telling her.

Nyota stood from the bed and stretched. She decided that she would go out to the living room to wait for Spock...usually, after dinner and meditation, he would join Sarek there for a game of chess. While she wasn't fond of the game, she didn't mind simply sitting next to Spock for company.

She padded her way out into the hall, and then to the living room. When she entered, Sarek set aside his PADD.

"Ms. Uhura." he acknowledged. She sat down, unsure of how she should address him- a week, now, and she still didn't know what to call him. She had never been alone in a room with him for long- Spock was almost always with her.

"Ambassador- sir." Nyota said, wincing inwardly.

"You may call me Sarek." he said.

"Well, then you're going to have to call me Nyota." she replied. He blinked at her, and folded his hands before him.

"Very well, Nyota. As of tomorrow, we will be members of the same family, after all."

They fell silent. Nyota studied the man sitting across from her...had he really almost killed his wife? She couldn't imagine Sarek being that out of control...then again, she hadn't imagined that Spock could kill a man either- or at least, be the cause of his death.

How had Amanda handled it? T'Shan had not said that much. How does one cope with the fact that once every seven years, their husband may kill them, or at the very least cause them injury? Had Amanda ever been happy, knowing that information? How can one be happy with someone who could kill them? But she had stayed. She could have left Sarek, but she had not.

Nyota wanted to speak about Amanda to Sarek, who had known her even better than Spock had. But it had to be a painful subject for him...

"Something appears to be troubling you." Sarek observed. Nyota snapped out of her reverie, wondering what she should say now. Before she could decide, he spoke again. "We may not know one another well, but I have learned from my late wife how to listen. Is this in regards to Spock?"

"Well...sort of." Nyota said, and she adjusted herself in her seat, trying to get more comfortable. "I was just wondering...how did Amanda deal with it all? I mean...if it's not too much of me to ask..." she trailed off. Sarek did not look away from her.

"I will answer any inquiries about Amanda that you may have. Your situation in relation to hers is very similar."

"Well...how could she ever be happy? I mean- no offense to you." Nyota added hurriedly, again wincing inwardly. "But there were so many restrictions on her life when she lived on Vulcan...and having a full blooded Vulcan husband can't be easy for...for several reasons..." she trailed off again. Wasn't she supposed to be an expert in linguistics? Why couldn't she form the right words?

Sarek sat back in his chair, his eyes still on her.

"It was a very difficult adjustment for her to make." he said. "On many levels." he added, somewhat dryly. Nyota leaned forward, sensing that he was about to say more.

"Amanda and I met on Earth. I was the newly assigned junior ambassador, and she worked in the Embassy. We knew one another for a year before we journeyed to Vulcan to be bonded- but then we returned to Earth for our first two years of marriage. There were difficulties, of course- similar to those you have experienced with Spock. Mostly lack of understanding on my part. And there were other complications as well, but those need not be discussed."

Nyota had a feeling that she knew what the other complications were...

"When we decided that it was time to have a child, we went back to Vulcan. Highly skilled Vulcan geneticists allowed us to have Spock. But our first few years there were extremely hard for her. As you mentioned, there were many restrictions on her lifestyle. On Earth, she had found our difficulties tolerable, because she was still around her own people, free to live her life as she had before. But on Vulcan, she was expected to be someone entirely different outside of our home...she disliked it, to say the least. Despite this, she was able to find happiness. It was a great sacrifice for her to live on Vulcan- if she had wanted, she could have easily stayed on Earth- I would have allowed it, and I told her as much. She, however, insisted on joining me. If she were entirely unhappy, she would not have stayed on Vulcan.

"So yes...there were difficulties, Nyota. But Amanda was able to make the best of them. She considered herself to be a fortunate woman- a happy woman. Do not think that she was displeased. She was not."

Nyota contemplated this. Sarek would know better than anyone whether or not Amanda was happy...for almost thirty years, he had had a part of her mind in his. She did not believe that Sarek would lie about this. Amanda had been a happy woman- despite the Pon Farr.

She decided that if Amanda could survive three Pon Farrs and still be happy, then it must not be as bad as she had imagined it to be. If Spock ever did go through it...she was sure she would be able to cope with it.

"Have I assisted you at all?" Sarek asked. Nyota nodded slowly.

"Yes. You have- thank you." she said. She was still going to mention it to Spock, though...

At that time, Spock came in from the hallway. He took the chair next to Nyota, to begin the nightly ritual of 3D-chess.

___________________________________________________________

Spock rose early, when the dark sky was only tinged with a hazy gray on the horizon. Sunrise was at least thirty-nine minutes away.

He dressed, and left his room. T'Pau had instructed him to see her at sunrise on this day. He knew what it pertained to, and he was prepared for it. Nyota had warned him of what T'Pau had told her- that she would have words with him also. However, he had known before then.

He opened Nyota's door and allowed himself to look in on her as she slept. It was illogical...but he wanted to see her. She was curled up on her side, the thin sheet tossed away, exposing her bare legs and the over-large shirt she wore to bed- it was one of his black undershirts. Her hair was loose around her shoulders, the faint glow from an outside street light illuminating the glossy strands. He could hear her deep, even breathing.

"Soon, ashayam." he whispered, and then he closed the door. Soon, they could be together, unhindered. No Enterprise, no away missions, no Sarek or T'Shan...only them. He missed being able to hold her in his arms, more than he missed the actual joining of their bodies. One of the greatest advantages to only needing three or four hours of sleep was that he could watch her sleep for as long as he wished.

He left the house, heading toward the hover-car. It took him 15.3 minutes to arrive at T'Pau's domicile, and by that time the horizon had lightened further, from gray to a light blue. All over New Vulcan, his people were arising...and even now, he could hear workers in the city.

He did not have to announce himself to T'Pau. The door opened before he got there, revealing the old woman. She stepped back to allow him entrance before shutting the door behind him.

"You are early." she noted. Spock glanced around- when describing T'Pau's home to him, Nyota had sent him images of a dark, candlelit room. But now it was much brighter, revealing an assortment of furniture and two piles of cushions on the floor. The candles were extinguished.

After the traditional greetings, T'Pau bade him to kneel on the cushions, and he did so. She took her place opposite him.

"Spock, I am sure that you are aware of why you are here." T'Pau said. Spock did not reply, but bowed his head in acquiescence. "Your father has told me of your doings, and he has told me that he has already reprimanded you. I shall do so further.

"My brother- your grandfather- would be severely disappointed, as your father was upon hearing of your transgression. An illegitimate marriage in the noble S'chn T'gai clan is unheard of. For every generation for thousands of years, our ancestors have observed the marriage rites. You are aware of this- I need not repeat it. I must, however, stress on the fact that I am disappointed with you. As I told your bond mate- I am correcting your mistake because of the service you rendered me on Vulcan. I am also doing this to prevent shame on our clan. No one who will attend the ceremony knows that you are already bonded to Ms. Uhura. I would prefer to keep it that way."

"T'Pau, may I-"

"Silence!" T'Pau said, her arched eyebrows drawing together slightly. "I am not finished speaking."

Spock fell silent. He was unsure what had spurred him into interrupting. Once she was sure that he would not speak again, she continued.

"I wish for you to show me the moment that you bonded with her, so that I may be assured that you did not, indeed, do this deliberately. I must know that it was as you said- brought on by an excess of the human's emotions. If I find that you have done this while fully knowing at that moment what you were doing, I will halt all preparations for the ceremony, and you will be disinherited for rebelling."

Spock had no objections. He remembered precisely what his thought process had been at the time- he had not, at that moment, been aware that his actions would have such dire consequences. He had not considered anything other than the fact that his Nyota wished for the bond, and her determination had taken a forceful hold on him. He leaned forward slightly, indicating that T'Pau was welcome to the meld. She raised her hand and brought it to his temple.

She entered his mind, and he obediently brought forth the memory for her perusal. She sifted through it, separating the violent emotions that had distracted him, both his and Nyota's. After several minutes, she withdrew.

She did not say anything, only looked at him thoughtfully. He did not speak, lest he prompt her to admonish him again.

"Your passion for one another is very great." T'Pau said after several long moments. "A passion as strong as yours would be very difficult to overcome when making such a decision. It is obvious that you were not conscious of your error when it was made."

Spock almost breathed a sigh of relief- but that would have been too human. Perhaps he had spent too much time with Terrans...illogically, even though he had known he was not entirely to blame, there had been a tiny part of him that worried T'Pau would find something else, and order the ceremony canceled. How would he have been able to tell Nyota? And his father...

It was incredibly illogical to worry over something that had not happened. Spock reprimanded himself and turned his attention back to T'Pau.

"You should have maintained better control over yourself." she observed. "But I see no reason to not continue with our plans. Now, this is what we will do..."

___________________________________________________________

It was 1600 hours.

Spock stood at the designated 'marriage grounds'. As New Vulcan contained no ancestral property, a temporary place had been erected halfway between Vafer-tor'es and the caves to accommodate bondings and marriages for its inhabitants.

By tradition, the male's party arrived first at the grounds. Spock stood with his father and Elder Spock, wearing dark blue ceremonial robes. His hands were clasped behind his back as he stood calmly beside them. Five feet to his left was a gong. He closed his eyes briefly...soon, this whole thing would be behind them.

At the appointed time, Spock stepped toward the raised stone dais in the center of the circular area. He stepped onto it, and reached for the mallet that hung beside the gong- then he struck it, the sound reverberating throughout the grounds and echoing against the large boulders that surrounded the enclosure. It reminded him eerily of the Koshaak, but he could not allow those thoughts to invade his mind now...not when Nyota would soon be coming.

He waited precisely thirty seconds before striking it again. Another thirty seconds- and then the last clash. He stepped off the dais to wait.

Soon, there came sounds from behind the boulders ahead...a group of people came through the narrow opening, led by T'Pau, who sat in a chair carried by four Vulcan men. Her face was as blank and solemn as ever as she was carried forward...

Behind her were more Vulcans, some were males carrying lirpas. Behind them were women, carrying wooden frames with bells attached, which they shook as they walked- the bells made a lovely sound, pure and melodic, a complete contrast to the loud clanging of the gong.

And then...there she was...

When he caught sight of his adun'a, he could not breathe. He did not think he had ever seen her look as beautiful as she did at that moment.

She wore a red gown...it reminded him of the gown she had worn to the Embassy earlier in the week, but the hue was lighter, and it was made of a different material. The fabric seemed to float around her as she walked, light and thin, highlighting her every curve...he noted that the cloth was flimsy- it would have been see-through if it were not layered. He also noted that it would be easy to rip.

Her hair was down around her shoulders. She had not straightened it- it fell in loose waves, the black tresses glimmering in the sunlight. As he watched her approach, she was struggling not to smile, and failing.

He had never understood what humans meant when they said someone 'glowed'. But now he did- her happiness was making her skin radiant, her cheeks flushed. Her dark brown eyes were sparkling.

When the marriage party stopped and fell silent, T'Pau said something. He did not know what- his gaze was focused on the brilliant woman before him. He had to force himself to listen- he did not want to make a fool of himself.

He turned toward the gong, and raised the mallet one last time- this was the part where if, for whatever reason, the female did not wish to go through with the marriage, she would declare koon-ut-kalifee and choose her champion. However, Nyota did not step forward to stop him- not that he expected her to.

Once the last echoes had dissipated, he hung the mallet up. T'Pau stood from her chair, and approached them.

"Kneel on the dais." she instructed. Spock stepped up onto the dais- Nyota followed, and they knelt across from each other, legs folded under them, next to the pit that held a small ceremonial fire. Spock extended the two fingers of his right hand, and Nyota followed his lead, two fingers touching against his in the ozh'esta. The bond had been closed since that morning- T'Pau had insisted on it- but through the skin contact, he could feel her joy, and her nervousness from being in front of so many observers.

T'Pau was saying something again- but once more, he was focused on his wife. She was smiling widely now, no longer trying to restrain herself. She increased the pressure of her fingers against his, as if to express her excitement.

T'Pau turned toward them, and reached out to touch each of their temples. Suddenly, all three of them were draw into a three-way mind meld.

To the outside observers, it would appear that T'Pau was guiding them into establishing the bond. But instead, she was merely instructing them to convey their emotional states. This was simple enough- soon they were exchanging their love, happiness, contentment- everything they currently felt.

T'Pau observed this mutely. Then she withdrew, and they were separate once more.

"I declare this union legitimate and sanctioned by the house of S'chn T'gai." T'Pau announced, turning to face the wedding party. "We welcome S'chn T'gai Nyota into our midst."

The bells were jingling again, filling the thin air with their clear song. The lirpas were pounded three times into the hard-packed sand at their feet. Drums from the farthest members of the party were beaten.

Spock stood, and held out his hand to Nyota, who accepted it. He pulled her up and led her off of the dais. She squeezed his hand tightly, and he opened the bond, letting her feel his love again. She was grinning now, white teeth glinting.

"T'Pau's education regarding my behavior can wait." Nyota thought at him. "To hell with not smiling!"

The wedding party was moving once more- turning toward the narrow entrance again. Spock and Nyota fell in line behind Sarek and Elder Spock- and they were led away.

The caves were near- only a quarter of a mile. The wedding party led them toward the waiting caves, the bells and drums still sounding, proclaiming to all within hearing range that the couple was now officially married. Well, not quite officially...there was still one last ceremony to undergo...

It seemed to take much longer than ten minutes to reach the cave that had been prepared for them. The entrance was dark and forbidding, but they hardly noticed as they stood before it together. Spock extended his fingers toward her again, and hers joined his in the ozh'esta. They stood like that, facing the party, until the Vulcans turned and began to leave.

They watched them recede into the distance, the bells and drums dying away...

And then they were alone at last.

A/N: Yes, I know- I said the caves would be in this chapter. I lied.

Instead, all of chapter 20 will be devoted to the seven days in the cave. It will be full of a mixture of smut and fluff.

I think the wedding scene was a bit rushed, but that's because I'm so clueless about Vulcan weddings.

I was also supposed to have Nyota open that heirloom box that was Amanda's...but I forgot about it until I was halfway through the wedding, and I decided that this chapter was already long enough, so I'll work that in later. Plus, I was just too lazy to go back and add it, LOL.