Hello! Omg, Im so sorry for the wait! I really don't have any excuses other than i'm just really lazy...
Tobi is Tobi
If Deidara had to choose, he would rather admit that Sasori-danna's art had the best frame of mind- he shuddered at the thought- than listen to Tobi raddle on and on and on and on…
"…Tobi thinks this mission is taking too long, Deidara-senpai! Tobi is hungry, Tobi is tired; can we stop at that dango shop Deidara-senpai? Please? If you keep your eyebrows like that Deidara-senpai, you'll get wrinkles, like the ones Leader-sama has! Oooh, are you mad Deidara-senpai? Because Leader-sama gets mad really easily, and then he scrunches his eyebrows, like you are now, Deidara-senpai, and he gets wrinkles!"
Vaguely, the only part of him that was listening-a very small part mind you-, wondered if Leader-sama had wrinkles, and how only Tobi of all people noticed. Deidara's scowl merely deepened, as Tobi continued to rant.
"Oh, oh, Deidara-senpai, Deidara-senpai, can we stop at a dango shop? Tobi is really hungry!"
Damn it, Damn it, Damn it! Deidara's bright blue eyes, which shown with clear irritation, glared toward the early morning pink, purple and blue sky. Damn you Kami! Damn Pein for making Tobi my partner! Damn Sasori-danna for dying! Damn that Itachi Uchiha!
Deidara sighed heavily, running a lightly sun-kissed hand down his face in a show of exhaustion and annoyance. One of his brightly blue eyes peeked from between his fingers to see Tobi run off ahead of him, his feet kicking up dirt and dust from the road while his arms flailed all about him as he giggled. Deidara let his hand fall back to his side as he glared at the slowly disappearing masked annoyance from hell.
Deidara's foot paused mid-step, his long blonde hair swaying in its pony-tail from the slight breeze, he then stepped lightly to the right just as a kunai was thrown into the dirt, where he had been standing. He blinked at the weapon, before grinning, finally some fun. Pale white clay, from small pouches on the sides of his hips; was already in the mouths on his palms being chewed into creations as his fingers twitched with excitement.
Locating the ninja easily enough he twisted his body around swiftly, his feet kicking up dirt making dust fly around as his hair twirled lightly, following his body movements. He paused though to see three young children staring –glaring – up at him in suspicion.
Now, don't get him wrong, Deidara has killed children before, genin and civilian, so that was not why he stopped himself from attacking them. What had stopped him was that fact that these children were all blonde, blue eyed and had his villages' hitai-ate worn proudly on their foreheads. Curiosity burned its self into his stomach.
The one standing between them appeared to be the oldest and the tallest, his pale blonde hair pulled into a short and spiky ponytail. He wore a simple black shirt and blue ninja pants along with black sandals. Deidara's head tilted to the side as he looked into the tallest child's eyes, the pale blue was glowing with pure sadness and rage.
The kid to the tallest pre-teen's left wore a grey shirt and grey pants with blue sandals, his blonde hair was pulled into a pony-tail that sat on top of his head, and fell to the top of his neck. This kid's eyes also shown with sadness and fury, the same as the others did.
The last kid and the shortest of all three, standing a head shorter than the other two had short cropped blonde hair and bright blue eyes that held the same as the other two. He wore a black, long sleeved shirt with grey, baggy shorts and black sandals. In each of his hands he had two kunai.
Deidara raised a thin blond eyebrow at the three. He was curious about why genin would willingly attack an S-Class missing-nin, but also annoyed for not being able to have a challenge.
The brat in the middle spun a kunai out of his holster with a firm grip, "We're going to kill you Deidara!"
Deidara blinked blankly, before snorting. He wasn't all that surprised the brat knew his name. He was an Akatsuki and an S-class missing-nin, plus the kids were from his village. A slow smirk grew across his face, his amusement obvious, to the fury of the three genin. "Really?" His voice was a slow, bored drawl.
The shortest growled in annoyance, "You're going to pay for killing our families! We know it was you that caused that explosion in our village a few years ago!"
Deidara shrugged, "Yeah, and? What do a bunch of genin think that their going to do against an S-class missing-nin, un?"
The three genin all flinched at the large difference in power and rank. They hadn't really been thinking when they saw the missing-nin calmly walking down the dirt road. They were just enraged when they saw him just calmly walking as if he owned the road its self; when he should be dead for his crimes. Actually, now that they were thinking properly now, they wondered why Deidara hadn't already killed them for just randomly attacking him out of nowhere. Genin, with hardly – if any – experience in battle, foolish genin.
Fear chilled down their spines making their stomachs churn when they suddenly realized the situation they had just gotten themselves into, and their sensei was pretty far from them getting a room in an apartment. Not that their sensei could do much against this man. Of course their sensei was strong, he had to be to be a jounin, but he was no match for Deidara. What had they been thinking? Nothing, that's what, how stupid.
Deidara snickered to himself when he saw the fear that had been absent now enter the children's eyes. His head tilted to the side, the camera on his other peeking out from behind the bang of his hair; appearing as though it was a robotic eye. "What should I do with you now, un?"
The knees of the genin quivered, and their fingers trembled but they stood their ground, unknowingly impressing Deidara with their bravery, however idiotic it was.
"Deidara-senpaiiiii~" The shrill squeal blared from behind Deidara.
Deidara slapped a hand to his face, shit, how could I have forgotten Tobi!
The genin exchanged looks of confusion, though still terrified, when another man wearing the same cloak as Deidara draped himself on Deidara's shoulders. "Tobi thought Deidara-senpai was lost! Tobi couldn't find you anywhere Deidara-senpai!"
Deidara growled under his breath in annoyance, "Lost? The hell, un? I'm pretty damn sure you got yourself lost." Deidara could almost feel the pout the other man was sporting; how disgusting. "Get off'a me, un!" He finally snapped when Tobi didn't immediately remove himself from around his shoulders. He harshly shrugged the other man off of him, swiftly turning around to meet him head on and narrowly missing when he lazily threw a small spider of exploding clay at Tobi.
Tobi immediately squealed in horror, his arms automatically flying into the air and ran around in circles when the small spider gave chase. Deidara snickered under his breath for a moment before snapping his gaze to the young ninjas that he had turned his back on; which was stupid, even if they were lower rank ninja and were significantly weaker than Deidara, they were still ninja and could easily have luck on their side. He was considered the 'bad guy' after all. The three genin flinched at his speed, but surprisingly hadn't moved from the spot much.
Tobi was instantaneously, unfortunately, by his side nearly touching his shoulder, when the little spider exploded on its own to stare at the three brats. "Ooooh! Tobi gets it now Deidara-senpai!"
Deidara gave him a weary look of exasperation, and drawled slowly, "Really, un?"
"Yeah, Yeah! Deidara-senpai wasn't lost, you were playing with genin!" Tobi nodded his masked head in understanding.
Deidara blinked blankly for a moment before sputtering in fury, "What! Playing?! What the hell do you mean by that, un?!"
Tobi titled his head to the side slightly, "What do you mean Deidara-senpai? All I said was that you were playing with genin!"
Deidara growled, "Why do you keep saying it like that!"
"Saying what like what?" Innocent confusion was obvious in his voice.
Innocent my ass, Deidara hissed in his mind. "Playing! Why do you keep saying it like that, un?"
"Like what Deidara-senpai? All I was saying was that you were playing with genin..."
"Like that," Deidara snapped in angry frustration, his face burned red in vehemence, while his blond hair seemed to frizz with his anger.
"Tobi's confused…" Tobi slumped his shoulders; with his masked face titled downward.
Deidara slapped a hand to his face, "Never mind forget it! Let's just kill these brats so we can get on with the mission already." He grumbled under his breath, something that sounded suspiciously like 'Damn you Tobi'.
"But wait… Tobi thought you were playing with them… Tobi's so confused."
Deidara snapped. "That's it, un! Tobi you're dead! I'm not a pedophile or gay damn it, un!"
"But, but you look so much like a girl Deidara-senpai!"
Tobi released a scream that was a very high pitch and shrill sound that granted on everyone's ears, nearly exploding their ear drums, as if the clay-explosives weren't already doing that.
As all of this was going on the three genin swiftly and nearly silently, though they really didn't need to when there were so many explosions going on and made their trek back to their camp, they didn't really feel the need to kill Deidara as much anymore.
He was thankfully suffering quite a bit.
It was in such a strange way too.
I hope you like it?
Review please? :D
Again really sorry for the super lateness o.o...