Ludwig had a key to Feliciano's house, just as Feliciano had a key to Ludwig's. He arrived in Italy several hours after making the call to Feli, and arrived in Venice another two or so hours later. He barely remembered where Feliciano lived, seeing as he only visited a few times in the span of their friendship…Feliciano preferred being at Ludwig's house.

When he found the house, he stuck the key in the door, and opened it. He looked around the dark room, and the only thing he saw was the faint glowing from the treadmill Feliciano had left on. It wasn't running, but the screen still showed how far he had run. Curiosity got the best of him, and Ludwig walked over to it.

Miles: 43.6

Calories: 4360 approx.

Pulse: 35.

Ludwig was extremely confused, just as he had been all day with the events that had happened. Reading each number, he was taken aback a little more each time. This wasn't like Feliciano at all. Feli hated running…there was no way he could have run forty three miles…and having a pulse that low…that was scary. The machine was probably broken, he said to himself in the end. There was no way Feliciano had done that…all that running.

Ludwig walked up the stairs to Feliciano's room, and crept his way inside. He saw Feliciano sleeping peacefully in his bed, and sat down on the edge of it, gently shaking his arm to wake him up. He knew it was late, but he needed to see Feliciano right then and there. He needed to confirm that his beloved Italien was alright. Feliciano didn't stir, the only proof he was alive was the soft, (cute in Ludwig's mind) snoring coming from the smaller of the two men .

Ludwig sighed in relief, and let the man sleep. He walked over to the couch in Feli's room, and laid down on it, going to sleep himself. As he drifted to sleep, he pondered all the things that could be bothering Italy…could be "wrong" with Italy. He thought and thought, but all the ideas he came up with just seemed wrong…strange…nothing like Feliciano at all.

Bipolar disorder…

Mood disorder…

Paranoia…

Split personality…

He went through his made up list, and just shook his head. None of them made sense to him. They'd explain Feliciano's latest outbursts…but that was the first time he'd seen Feliciano act that way…must have been a fluke. He shrugged to himself. He couldn't worry about it now. He had to sleep to get energy, in order to help Feliciano.

Morning came soon enough, and Feliciano was the first to wake up, like normal. It was too dark for him to see Ludwig sleeping on the couch, and he walked right past him, heading down to the room downstairs so he could go for his ten mile run. Before he did so, he stopped in the bathroom, and weighed himself. He had dropped two whole pounds. His heart soared and leaped for joy. He looked at himself in the mirror, and began pinching at his skin, pulling, trying to see how much more he had to lose.

You've got a long way to go, Feliciano…you're still too fat…you'll only look good and be skinny enough when I tell you you are…okay?

Said the voice kindly. The voice always was kinder whenever Feliciano lost a lot of weight, it was as if he was being praised by the devil inside of his head. He was so proud of himself, and just smiled that same odd smile. The one that was honest…but didn't quite seem like it belonged to the cute, innocent Feliciano.

He put on his sweats and walked down the stairs to the treadmill. He turned it on, and stepped on. He set it to run at five miles per hour for the first half mile, then sped it up till he was running fifteen miles per hour.

The sound of the machine going woke Ludwig up slowly. He sat up, and yawned, stretching, and walked down the stairs to find Feliciano in sweats…which was a sight he had never seen…as well as seeing the Italian willingly running. The baggy sweat pants kept sagging with every few steps he made, and he had to keep pulling them up. The size small was getting too big for him, though that didn't mean anything to Feliciano. He was still too fat.

Ludwig didn't want to scare the other, so he sneaked out the back door, walked around to the front, and knocked, hoping Feliciano would answer it. He wanted to pretend he was never even in the house so he didn't scare him.

Feliciano stopped the machine, turning it off. He ran up stairs to change out of his sweats and into his boxers, pretending he had just woke up. He opened the door and rubbed his eyes, yawning cutely. He looked up and was surprised when he saw Ludwig standing there.

"L-Lu…er…Germany! What are you doing here?" he asked, taken aback.

"I told you to call me Ludwig." He smiled warmly, and entered the house without invitation, knowing Feliciano wouldn't really do anything about it. Besides, if he asked, Feliciano would probably have said no. He sat down on a comfy chair in the living room, across from the treadmill.

"I was worried about you, Feliciano…you didn't pick up your phone last night…so I decided to come over and make sure you were okay…about yesterd-" but Feliciano cut him off.

"Don't bother bringing up the past, Germany." He said firmly, and with a bit of an annoyed voice. Not annoyed at Germany per say, but mad that he wouldn't be able to finish his run.

Feliciano sat next to him on the couch and stretched a bit, feeling very sore from his run last night. Ludwig looked closely at the Italian when he knew Italy wasn't looking, and saw small circles, purple and blue and red around his body.

"Feliciano…were you mugged or something?" he asked, worried about the bruises on his best friend.

"Who hurt you?" he asked. Feliciano just shook his head quickly.

"No one hurt me…and I'm fine…I just…stumbled down the stairs one morning…I'm fine.." he said, lying. He had passed out at the top of the stairs and fell all the way down two flights. If it wasn't for being a nation, he probably would have died, or at least have been more injured than just getting a few bruises.

Ludwig looked at Feli worriedly.

"You're not that big of a klutz to fall down stairs…what happened." Feliciano hated lying, so he answered truthfully, with a little white lie.

"oh it's nothing…It was a few weeks ago…I hadn't gotten much sleep in the past week or so…and at the top of the stairs I just kinda…fell asleep from exhaustion…that's all…don't worry about it. No one hurt me, and I didn't hurt myself." He said with a big smile.

A big, fake smile.

Ludwig looked at him with even more worry, and suspicion.

"Why weren't you able to sleep?" he asked, and put the possibility of Insomnia on his made up list of all of Feli's ailments.

"Oh, I was just drinking way too much coffee…especially at night. I went out with Lovino for like…two weeks straight to café's and drank lots of espresso." He laughed. That was true actually, he drank it all so he could work out at night when his brother was sleeping.

Ludwig raised an eye brow, and leaned in a bit, looking Feliciano in the eyes. His heart fluttered being so close to his face, but he was trying to see if Feliciano's eyes were being honest with him. He couldn't tell at all, so he pulled back and sighed.

"Alright…I just want to make sure you're okay, Feliciano…you mean a lot to me." He explained.

He's lying.

"You're lying." Feliciano muttered after hearing that thought. Ludwig was taken aback, not expecting Feli to snap like that, or reply so quickly.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, confused. Feliciano looked away. He couldn't say much…he didn't want to give things away…but…he did want to see if he could find out how Ludwig felt about him…he didn't want to get his hopes up though…but they were already pretty high.

"Why? Because I'm annoying…useless…a worthless person…everyone says it…everyone thinks it…I hear people when they're talking to you…asking why you even look my way, let alone be friends with me." He sighed, a few tears welling in his eyes, but he wouldn't let them fall this time…at least he'd try his hardest to make sure it didn't happen.

Ludwig felt so sad hearing that. He hated the fact that Ludwig had heard those conversations…but he assumed Feliciano only heard the other person's side of the conversation.

"Feli…do you want to know what I say to them? I tell them to go shove it…because that's no thing you say about your best friend…sure…you're annoying…but, Feli…I'm annoying too…I'm too serious most of the time…and I'm too loud, and too angry, and too studious…I don't know how to let lose unless I'm with you…Feli, you keep me grounded…you make me …feel human." He smiled. He was so close to confessing to Feliciano. Was now the right time? How would the other react? He gulped nervously. He looked from Feli's eyes, to his lips, then back up to his eyes. He wanted to act on his thoughts so bad, but held back.

"And another thing…is that I never listen to my heart…even when I really should." He muttered. Feliciano didn't understand what he meant by that, but laughed.

"And my problem is, is that I never listen to my brain." He grinned, scooting a little closer to Ludwig. He laid down, setting his head on Ludwig's comfy lap, and took a deep breath, sighing.

"you know…We've been friends…for a very, very long time…" he chuckled.

"Ja…we…we really have…" he began, gulping again, before he spoke once more.

"And…since we've been friends for so long… I think it's about time that we…took the next step and…become something more…" he stammered, hoping he said it right. Praying that the other understood him.

"REALLY!?" he squealed in delight, and hugged Ludwig tightly around the waist.

"Now we're super best friends! I'm so happy!"

Feliciano didn't get it.

At all.

Is he really that…oblivious? Ludwig thought to himself. He took a deep breath. It's not like he had been rejected by Feli…he would just have to be more clear the next time he tried to ask Feliciano out. The last time he had tried, failed terribly. He proposed to the other on valentine's day, and royally screwed things up. He shook the memory out of his head. He'd rather not remember how horribly it went right now.

He smiled and hugged Feliciano back.

"Ja…super best friends…" he said softly. He took a deep breath again, and then again, taking Feli's scent in. He couldn't really tell what he smelled like…it was different than the normal fruity smell that lingered on his skin. It was a mix of salt and sweat. He pulled away, and grabbed Feliciano's wrist, feeling his pulse, though Feliciano had no clue what he was doing.

He counted in his head, and did the math. It was thirty six. A little above what the machine had said. He must have done it wrong. He tried three more times, and got roughly the same number each time.

"Feliciano… I really want you to go to a doctor…okay?" he begged, holding Feli's hands in his own, squeezing them slightly. Feliciano's hands were beginning to become a sweaty mess. His whole body was. He was so anxious from being this close to Ludwig…being so personal and honest. He didn't know if he could hold back if he started talking again, so he stayed quiet. He just shook his head, saying no to the plea for him to go to the doctors.

"I'm fine…" was all he uttered.

Ludwig then slowly let go of Feliciano's hands, and put them down on the Italian's lap.

"Feli…you're scaring me…I…I saw you on the treadmill…running…you hate running…Feli…you're scratching at yourself…" he didn't care what he would say next, it all needed to be said. "You're hurting yourself…you're amazing, incredible self…" he said, blushing deeper and deeper with each sentence. Each little confession.

Feliciano just sat there, a stolid expression on his face. He didn't listen to Ludwig…only to his thoughts.

He's lying to you to make you feel better. He is spouting lies and wants you to fall for his cruel prank, and make you look a fool!

"I know…" Feli said to his thoughts, and looked down at his hands, pinching the skin on his hands, and took his thumb and forefinger to make a ring around his wrist. When Feliciano grew anxious, he would body check, making sure no part of his body had grown any bigger than it was the previous time he checked…but the anxiety distorted everything, and he felt ten times bigger. He quickly stood up, and began pacing a bit.

"Ludwig…I know you're lying to make me feel better….just…stop it…You're going to make me feel certain feelings, and think certain things…and I'll be crushed in the end when none of what you say is true…please…always be honest with me…and stop these cruel lies!" he whimpered loudly, pinching at himself even more now, no longer to check how big he was, but to hurt himself. He pinched harder and harder, leaving even more bruises on his body.

Seeing as Feliciano was so malnourished, he bruised very easily. He didn't care though. He deserved to be covered in scars and in bruises. He deserved all that pain. He wanted to wallow in self pity, and hate himself. He wanted to self harm…in any way shape or form…aside from cutting. He'd never do that…and it was for a silly reason. He liked walking around naked so much, that he didn't want anyone to notice he had scars from cutting…but he had plenty of faint scars, little red and brown marks all over his body from where he had scratched.

Ludwig jumped up, and grabbed Feli's hands. "Stop it! You're hurting yourself…please…Feliciano…let's do something together…okay? Like we always do…how about we go for a gondola ride? You love rowing those things, ja? Does that sound fun?" he asked, hopeful. Feli shook his head.

"Non…I want to run!" he begged, and covered his eyes. He had never admitted that before. Even though it was a simple statement, the feeling behind it was enormous. He was really trying to convey that he couldn't stop exercising. He (deep deep deep deep down) wanted Ludwig to catch on, to stop him…to care for him, and to tell him he was beautiful the way he was.

But you know better than to believe those lies. Feli…you'll only be beautiful when I say you are…when you're thin…when your body matches how you are on the inside…then you'll be beautiful…too bad your insides are just as bad as how you look.

Feli shuddered at the thoughts in his head, and looked up at Ludwig.

"Will it make you happy to go for a ride with me?" he asked, hoping Ludwig would say 'ja'. He needed a distraction as soon as possible. He didn't care what it was, but one more moment in his house and he'd end up running. As badly as he wanted to, he couldn't in front of Ludwig.

"Okay…umm…Feli…just calm down. You've just said several things…why do you want to run…you've never liked running before…you hated it when I made you do training with me…and no offence, you were kinda horrible at it…unless I was running away from you, then you always tried to catch up. But aside from that…you've never liked exercise." He noted, and put his hand against the Italian's pale, clammy forehead. He pulled away when he felt that Feli was a little too warm.

"Feliciano…you look awful."

You look hideous.

"Your clothing hangs off of you like rags…"

You've gained too much weight, you fat ass.

"I'm so worried about you…Feli …I…"

I hate you so much, Feliciano.

He looked up at Ludwig with sad, dull gold eyes. They hadn't been vibrant ever since he was with Holy Rome. All excitement had left him. All love and happiness left with that little boy's death. Ludwig somehow brought happiness and love back into his life bit by bit over the years they were friends, but he still felt empty.

"Ludwig…you don't understand…and I can't tell you…" he said firmly, though his voice was shaking. He looked down at his feet, and walked over to the stairs.

"I'll be back, let me get dressed." He said, and walked up the stairs to his room.

When inside his room, he went through his closet, and found some nice looking casual clothes. He put on the largest thing he had, still thinking it was too tight on him. It was sort of like putting a baby dolls clothes onto a Barbie doll. That's what Feli looked like. It actually kind of looked a bit silly to be honest. As fashionable as Feliciano was, he couldn't pull off that look anymore. He was too scrawny.

Lose a few more pounds and it'll look good on you again.

Feli walked down the steps, feeling very dizzy, and met Ludwig again at the couch. He looked up at Feli, and stood up, grabbing his shoulders as Feliciano began swaying.

"Feliciano…have you eaten anything yet?" he asked. It wasn't that he suspected anything about the Italian's eating habits, he had seen the Italian eat pile upon pile of pasta…he wasn't worried about Feliciano's intake (other than he might eat too much sometimes). He just knew that if you didn't eat breakfast within one to two hours of waking up, it could throw off your body, making you feel sick and dizzy.

Feli nodded his head, lying…and he knew that Ludwig knew he was lying.

"Feliciano. You're going to eat…okay? I'll cook for you…how about some fried eggs…some bacon…beans…" he suggested, listing some foods he liked to eat. Feli's eyes widened in horror. All that fat. All those carbs. All the fried grease. He wouldn't ruin his progress now by filling his body with toxic foods.

"Ludwig. I said I already ate. Drop it, and leave me alone." He said in a deeper, gruff voice." His eyes were cold and demanding. They told Ludwig not to push Feli's buttons, and not to pry. Ludwig just sighed, nodded, and took Feliciano's hand like Feli usually did to him, and walked him out of the door.

He had the extreme urge to interlace their fingers together…but he wasn't sure Feliciano would act well to it. He wanted to try though. He shifted his hand around Feliciano's, and tried to subtly slip his fingers between Feli's, but as soon as he tried to do this, Feli yanked his hand away.

"Stop teasing me, Ludwig!" he said, holding his hand to him, cowering a little bit.

He's pranking you…he hates you and you know it. Why are you even hanging out with him? You don't deserve to even be his friend.

"Just…why don't you go home and leave me alone…I'm nothing but a burden to you…" he muttered.

"Feliciano…listen to yourself…you sound crazy."

You are crazy, Feliciano.

"Please…just …try to enjoy yourself…I know the past day or two have been very stressful on you…seeing as you got sick from the bad sauce…and then the confusion about the birthday issue…all those things got in the way of you having a good time…let me help you have a good day today…please?" He said, practically begging. Feli thought about it.

You don't deserve to have a good day. What have you done in your entire, pathetic life to have a perfect man like Ludwig treat you like royalty like he is right now? NOTHING! You deserve to die if you accept his offer.

Feli gulped, and shook his head. "L-Ludwig…you can stay if you want…you came all this way." Feliciano said, not really wanting Ludwig to leave him…he loved to be around Ludwig. It made him feel safe…feel comforted…feel like he had friends…even if his mind told him the friendships were all lies. ..he still liked to pretend.

Ludwig nodded, and took Feli's hand again. He was afraid if he let go of Feli, he'd lose him. He didn't know why he was thinking that…but he was. Feli and him walked back into the house, and Feli walked up to his room, Ludwig following behind him. Feli collapsed onto the bed, laying on his stomach, and Ludwig sat beside him, rubbing his back with one hand, drawing circles.

"Ludwig…" he whispered sadly and softly, barely audible to the point where Ludwig just barely heard and made out his name.

"Hmm…what is it, Italien?" he asked, stopping.

"…I…I lo…" he froze. What was he doing. He wasn't really going to say it. That was madness!

"I long to go to sleep…I'm very tired…would you lay with me?" he asked, hoping the answer was yes. He wanted Ludwig's arms around him…he wanted their legs to be tangled together, their hands to be held together. They didn't ever do those things, unless they were in a deep sleep, and didn't notice they were doing it. That wasn't something friends do…which gave him the smallest pinch of hope, making him think that maybe…just maybe Ludwig liked him…

Ludwig nodded.

"I'd love to…" he smiled, and took his jacket and shoes off, and crawled onto the bed with Feliciano. He blushed, and opened his arms up for Feliciano to snuggle into. Feli though, thought this was another prank to tease him, so he rejected Ludwig's invitation.

"Stop teasing me…"