A/N: I still have readers/reviewers - yay! :-) Not that I'd stop writing this in any case - I love it too much to stop!
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)
4. Adored and Ignored
"Startin' to think you was never comin' back" said Mal the moment Inara opened the door to her shuttle.
He was leant against the wall opposite, trying to be the picture of casual, she knew, in spite of the fact she was certain he'd been checking the time and tapping his foot with irritation until she finally docked the shuttle back onto Serenity.
"Had I known you were so eager for my return, I might've stayed away longer" she teased him as she stepped out of the shuttle and the two met in the middle of the corridor, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder, or so they used to say once upon a time"
"Mean to say I could ever love you more'n this?" he asked her as he put his arms around her, "Darlin', you think that then you ain't an idea how much I feel for ya"
"Oh, I'm fairly certain that I do" she smiled brightly at his oddly romantic words, "but if you'd like to remind me at all..." she said softly, anticipating the long, deep kiss that came next.
It showed he loved her, she knew that, but Inara wasn't so naive as to think Mal didn't have an ulterior motive. He tolerated her profession most of the time, but whenever she returned from a business trip, he had a happy little habit of needing to re-claim her as his property somehow. She ought to be offended in a way, and yet it was so strangely romantic and sweet to her, she just couldn't be angry.
"As much as I could happily let this continue" she said, pulling away before he was expecting her to, and almost knocking the pair of them over, "I have to see River before I do anything else" she told him, quickly pulling from his arms before he could argue, leaving him pouting as she hurried away.
"Damn, womenfolk" he cursed as Inara left him alone, with a problem he didn't fancy solving his ownself.
Right now, Inara couldn't care about that. There was a reason she was a little late coming home from her trip. Passing through the town she had spotted the sweetest gift for River in a shop window and simply couldn't've have forgiven herself had she not purchased it for the mother-to-be. She found the girl in question in the Washbournes new sleeping quarters, a larger room than their original bunk so as to make room for the baby and all the paraphernalia that came with a child.
"May I come in?" she asked, as she tapped at the open door and Zoe smiled from her place sat on the edge of the bed with Alyssa in her arms, River perched beside her, and Daniel sat cross legged on the floor, concentrating hard on a drawing it seemed.
"Of course" the warrior woman told her, "How was your latest trip?"
"Tiring" Inara admitted, "but worthwhile, if not only because of this" she grinned as she waved a paper bag in her hand and entered the room, "This is for you, mei mei" she told River as she sat down the other side of Zoe and passed the present over the baby's head.
"You wanna hold a while?" she offered her friend, handing over baby Alyssa a while as River looked curiously at the package from Inara then carefully opened it.
Inside she found the most beautiful little white gown, a tiny little silken garment meant for a baby girl to be christened in, she knew. It had cost a great deal but had been chosen with love by the woman River's baby would call Aunt Inara.
"Zoe, I would've brought one for Alyssa too" the Companion assured her friend as she hugged the baby close to her body and smiled down on the child she loved as dearly as any she might ever have herself, "but I know you have plans to use a piece from your wedding dress..."
"It's fine, Inara" Zoe assured her, "Appreciate the help you're gonna give me in making my baby's dress, and I know River was hankerin' for something new for her little one"
"Wedding dress is no good for making new from" the younger brunette agreed, "Jayne-man was very impatient on the wedding night" she whispered to Inara and Zoe who both bit their lip in attempts not to laugh, "Baby girl will be a little vision in white" she smiled as she held aloft the dress Inara had bought for her, "Best aunts for a baby to have, best family for us" she grinned, tears forming in her eyes even as she did so.
"Now, little one, no cryin'" Zoe warned, putting an arm around her, "You'll set us all goin'" she told River, though tears hardly came naturally to her and Inara was an expert at hiding such emotions, even if she felt them.
"Can't help it" sniffed River, carefully folding up the christening gown and placing it beside her on the bed, "Feel so special, mother like you soon, real and special... can hardly believe the happiness" she smiled widely.
"I can't imagine there is any better feeling than carrying a child" agreed Inara with a smile that didn't quite meet her eyes as she looked down at Alyssa who wriggled in her arms.
"Promise you it's true" Zoe sighed as she reached out a hand to stroke her baby's face, "Best feeling in the world I ever knew, to carry my Lyssa, and bring her into the world..."
"Can't wait" sighed River, all three of them so distracted the baby that nobody noticed Daniel had abandoned his work.
He was soon on his feet, rushing over to the bed and grabbing up the precious christening dress, slinging it across the room with an almighty roar.
River was beyond stunned by his behaviour, but did not yell, even as she rose to her feet and watched her son bolt from the room.
"What in the gorram hell...?!" Jayne exclaimed as he appeared in the doorway, having caught the tail end of Daniel's screaming and running only, "What's happenin' here?" he asked River who stared beyond him still.
"Pain" she said as a wave of feelings from her son's mind crashed over her, "Green as trees, thick as molasses" she winced at the feel of it inside her head, a hand going to her chest as she convulsed a little, "Drowning, and fears we will not see"
"In words o' sense, babydoll" Jayne tried not to lose his temper at her latest riddle, but he was way too agitated to be calm with his boy running around screaming and River looking as if she were about to keel over with some kind of sickness.
"Daniel is afraid" she explained as she turned and carefully leant over to retrieve the christening gown, "Afraid sister will matter more than brother. That child born will be worth more than child made" she told him, as she held up the rescued gift for him to see.
"Oh, I should have been more thoughtful" Inara chided herself, "I bought a gift for when the baby comes, I never meant to make Daniel feel unworthy"
"Ain't your fault, 'Nara" Zoe assured her friend as she took Alyssa back from her, the baby starting to complain of hunger, "Kid's probably been feelin' like this a while, just today it came to a head is all"
"This is ruttin' crazy talk" Jayne complained, "Like we'd love one kid more than the other"
"He doesn't know" his wife shook her head, "Too young to understand, too confused. Has to know we love him, Jayne-man, have to tell him" she said, sounding much more upset about this than he could bear to see her.
"C'mon then, bao-bei" he said, offering her his hand, "Let's go fix this with the boy afore the whole ship hears it and sticks their nose where it ain't wanted" he told her as he led her away, leaving Zoe and Inara uncertain if they'd offended at all, or if Jayne was being his usual tactless self.
Jayne and River hurried hand in hand down the corridor, til they reached the door to Daniel's own bunk. Like Kaylee's pretty flowery sign that bore her name, the boy had his own sign too that told this room was his. A perfect picture of Serenity flying above the letters that spelled out his name, Uncle Mal had said it was one of the smartest things he'd seen in a good long while, and Daniel had been entirely proud of it. Ma and Pa had smiled at him, told him he was clever and good. Now, Daniel could not remember happy days such as this, and River could feel the pain he felt from her spot knelt by the hatch above.
"Have to remember, special boy" she called down to him, though she had no need to speak her words in reality, he would hear them from her mind.
"C'mon outta there, Danny!" his father told him, perhaps a little more stern than he should be when he knew the kid was already upset.
Still, Jayne was just a little mad at the kid. They'd come a long way since the boy had first leapt from a cryo pod clad in only shorts, risking being flung across the cargo bay as he grabbed at his unknowing-father's leg like a limpet. More than a year on, Jayne loved his son like a father should and made sure the kid knew it too, though words on such a subject hardly ever passed his lips. Actions spoke louder he had found, trust and all had formed in their odd little family. Realising Danny could really think that he wasn't loved enough hurt his father, despite the fact most would not believe such a man as Jayne Cobb could be wounded at all, least not by thoughts and words alone.
"Doesn't mean to shout" said River then, glaring some at Jayne before she turned her eyes back to the hatch beneath which their son hid, "Means to love and care. He hurts when we hurt. Black for your green"
Still no answer came from the boy, no sound of words or movement from his room. Wife looked to husband with an expression that told him he was going to have to fix this one. She had said all she could, it was up to Jayne now. With a sigh, the merc shook his head, sitting himself down beside the hatch with his back against the ships wall as he tried to figure out how he was supposed to get the kid to listen.
"See now, Danny" he said, as River curled up beside him, trusting him to say the right thing, even though he had little or no faith in himself to do so, "Ya ain't the only one to ever feel left outta somethin'. You think your Ma feels right normal when she's havin' one of her nightmare days, all messed up and screamin'. She don't feel like she fits at all, don't mean we love her less" he explained, squeezing River's hand as it slid into his own, "And me, well, you and your Ma are geniuses both. I ain't half so smart, no schoolin', can't see in other folks heads or nothin'. Makes me the third wheel, don't it?"
"Not true" his wife whispered, as she curled into his side, but Jayne knew it was.
"I ain't sayin' I mind none" he told River and Daniel both, "I know your Ma is happy enough tied to me for who I is, and if that don't prove she's crazy I dunno what does" he joked, making her look at him with wide eyes but a smile nonetheless, "See, son, that's family. We all left out some way or other, and when the little bit comes along, can't promise you ain't gonna feel it, but... it never means we don't love ya, son" he said sincerely, a little less awkward saying those words these days, and happier that he was at least alone with only his wife and child to hear him.
"Love always, and true" River echoed his sentiment, "Little sisters needs older brothers too" she said definitely, knowing just how true it was.
Without Simon to rescue her, she would've lived and died alone in the Academy, suffering for far too long. Brother had brought her to husband and son, father figure, friends and family all. Brought her home.
Eventually there was a clunk of the mechanism unlocking the hatch to Daniel's bunk and then the boy himself emerged. His expression was caught between shame for his actions, love for his folks, and the threat of tears that could be for any number of reasons.
"Sorry, Ma. Sorry, Pa" he said, hanging his head a moment then peering over at his seated parents, "Will love my little sister" he promised.
"C'mere you dumb young 'un" Jayne smiled in spite of himself as Danny ran into his mother's warm embrace, the two of them easily fitting into Jayne's arms.
It was stupid to believe his parents could ever love another child more than him, Daniel knew that now, and ought to have done so all along. Still, everyone was dumb sometimes, and that was okay. His family always loved him, and he always loved them, no matter what.
- The End -