A/N: This chapter is MUCH longer than the last and will be much longer than the following chapters. I thought of splitting it somewhere, but just couldn't find a place I liked.
I said before that the story is canon up through The Wedding of River Song, but I think that I should add that I consider the deleted scene in Journey's End to be canon. The Doctor did give the Meta-Crisis Doctor the piece of TARDIS to grow his own.
The Doctor stood at Rose's bedside and scanned her body with his sonic screwdriver for a third time, staring at the results in utter disbelief. With torch in hand again, he lifted the small patch of gauze on her forehead to examine the small laceration at the peak of a swollen lump. That couldn't possibly be extent of her injuries...
His knuckles brushed over her cheek as he pondered her and her return to the TARDIS. He could think of it as nothing but surreal. With a sigh, he lifted the loose sleeve of the gown he'd dressed her in, tied a tourniquet around her upper arm, and slowly brought a needle to the inside of her elbow.
Rose's eyes immediately flew open and her hands began tearing at his and the tourniquet's slip knot in a frenzied panic.
"Stop! Get off me!" she protested.
"No, Rose. Rose. Rose, it's okay," the Doctor held up his hands, dropped the needle on the floor, and helplessly pleaded for her to calm down. "Rose, it's me."
"Doctor?" she rasped through quick shallow breaths.
"Yes," he answered breathlessly.
The tiniest of smiles twitched at the corner of her mouth and she dropped her aching head back onto the pillow with her eyes closed. Tears slipped from her sealed lids, drawing tiny rivulets down the sides of her face toward her ears. "I made it."
"No, no, no. No tears," the Doctor whispered, quickly wiping them away. "Tears are for goodbyes. You don't greet someone with tears. Just hello or... or.."
"Hello." Rose choked out on a tearful chuckle.
"Yes, hello." The Doctor wiped another tear from her cheek. Despite his admonishment, the tears didn't seem to stop. "Rose, what...? Are you...? You..."
His mind was moving too quickly to be able to form a proper question. He had so many questions that he wasn't sure where to start. "Are you hurt? My scan says that you've got nothing more than a minor concussion, but... but you... Are you hurt?"
"Just sore," she answered.
"Just sore? Your body just careened through four levels of the TARDIS. I don't understand how you're alive. Just sore?"
Rose brought a hand up to her throbbing head and the Doctor quickly brought it back down. "You've got a cut on your head. The sealant hasn't finished drying, so you can't touch it yet. I know it hurts, but I haven't given you anything for pain yet. I was just going to insert an IV line-"
"No. No needles. No tests. No probes." Rose's voice was weak and her brow was creased in what the Doctor assumed was pain. "Simple pain reliever. Nothing more."
"My scanners aren't up. I'm still not sure of the full extent of your injuries. I want to insert an IV in case-"
"No. No needles. No tests. Just oral pain medicine. Please."
"Rose," the Doctor leaned over her and cupped her face until she opened her eyes and looked into his. "I'm scared. This doesn't make sense to me. You can't expect me to just stand here helplessly."
Another small smile crossed her lips and her eyes closed. "No," she replied with tears returning and a slightly larger smile. "I expect you to very grudgingly comply, insist that I rest, and return to the console to check the status of the TARDIS's repairs."
"Rose..."
The lights flickered on, illuminating the room, and Rose squeezed her eyes shut tighter against the brightness. The Doctor sighed and retrieved two small bottles from a nearby cupboard. "I guess this is the part where I comply, quite grudgingly, as you said. Only, I insist that along with pain medicine, you take something to speed recovery."
Rose nodded in agreement.
The Doctor sighed heavily again and shook himself from his troubled state the moment his eyes began to sting. "Rest. That's your part of the bargain. I'll be back soon and we'll... we'll talk."
The Doctor rubbed the back of his neck and slowly exited the room, closing the door behind him. Amy and Rory stood outside the door with impatient looks on their faces.
"How is she? Is she alright?" Rory hurried.
"Yes. Yes. She's miraculously unharmed, or relatively unharmed. No broken bones or internal bleeding, just a bump on the head."
"H-how is that possible? She-"
"How is it possible that she's here at all?" the Doctor countered.
"Yeah," Amy agreed. "But who is she even? You know her?"
"Yes," the Doctor's eyes were distant and his voice stoic. "She's a friend. A dear friend that I lost a very long time ago."
"Lost? Lost how?" Amy probed.
"Well, these things - adventures - don't always go as planned. She... She made a very brave decision once - far more than once. She was very brave. But she ended up in a parallel universe. The cracks sealed before I... It's a very long story, but I... I never thought I'd get to see her again."
"Why is she here? Did something happen? Is something wrong?" Amy worried.
"Oh, I hope not..." the Doctor frowned. "I'll talk to her after she rests a bit. I'm going to go see how River's coming along. Rory, do you think you could do me the favor of looking after her?"
"Of course," Rory nodded quickly.
"She's just had something for pain and accelerated healing, but she's very insistent that we don't treat her beyond that."
"You mean she's awake?" Rory's eyes widened in surprise.
"Was. She should be sleeping now. If she wakes, give her anything she asks for."
Rory nodded again. "Yeah, of course."
"Good. Thank you. Now, Amy, let's see what's going on in the control room."
"So how is she?" the Doctor asked as he strolled into the control room.
"I was going to ask you the same thing," River remarked, trying to gauge the situation by the Doctor's mannerisms. His stoicism made it impossible to tell.
"Yes, but I asked you first," came his reply.
"Well, her power is completely restored. There really wasn't much damage, so I don't know why there was trouble with the power at all. She's repairing all the damage herself as we speak. Speaking of that, though, I took a piece from the hole in the other control room. I thought you might like to see it. We compared it to paper, but it's more like rubber, very thin rubber."
The Doctor took the small swatch from River and examined it curiously. One side was the texture and color of the carpet in River's room and the other was metallic in feel and shine, yet it was altogether more similar to a latex balloon.
"Your turn. How is the girl?" River worried.
"Fine," he answered simply as he stretched the piece of TARDIS wall, testing its elasticity.
"Fine? What do you mean-?"
"Near perfect health. Just a bump on the head," he answered in a flat, steady tone.
"How is that possible?" she asked incredulously.
"Dunno."
"You know her. Who is she?"
"An friend. Her name is Rose. Rose Tyler. She travelled with me a long time ago." The Doctor held the material in front of his face and pulled it apart until it snapped in two.
"That's it? She's fine and her name is Rose Tyler? That's all you're going to tell us?" River snipped sardonically.
"Sorry, I'm a bit distracted," he apologized quietly. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go have a look at those repairs; see if I can work out anything else."
River and Amy watched the Doctor leave in stunned silence.
"This is really getting to him," Amy said as she leaned against the console, her brow furrowed in concern. "I haven't seen him this despondent since I forgot Rory."
"No... not since he found out you'd been taken," River corrected.
"She must mean a lot to him then. You don't know anything about her?"
"The Doctor very rarely reveals anything about his past. I've heard him say her name before. He does that sometimes. He'll look at something, chuckle, and very softly whisper a name. Donna. Sarah-Jane. Rose. Perhaps Rose more than others."
"But he never talks about them?"
"Sometimes, but rarely. Even then, it's usually that he and so-and-so once did something similar to whatever we're doing. Not Rose for that though. He's never talked about her. But..." A far off look washed over River and sadness fell into place as a small memory rushed forth. "This once... You see, the Doctor tries to be suave when he breaks me out for a date. He's made it a tradition to bring me a flower. Once while we were out, I bought myself a red rose and asked why he never brought me one of those. They're supposed to be the most romantic. He told me he never would. 'Roses are sad.' The night was over almost as soon as it started. Oh Lord, he's in love with her..." River dropped her face into her hands in utter dismay.
"Hey, you don't know that." Amy quickly placed a comforting hand on River's back. "The Doctor's hard to read. We just decided that he looked that upset about me and Rory, but he's not in love with us. It was guilt. He felt guilty. It's probably the same with this girl, Rose. He told me and Rory that he lost her and never thought he'd see her again. She was stuck in a parallel universe or something."
River gave a small nod and a forced smile. "I know it's selfish, but I hope that's all."
"Yeah..." Amy replied, unsure of what else to say.
"Speaking of Rory, where is he?"
"Doctor asked him to watch over Rose. You know, I don't know about you, but I think my curiosity's getting the better of me. Wanna go have a peek at her?"
"Yeah, actually, I do."
Rose startled suddenly at the light touch of cloth against her neck and Rory nearly jump out of his skin in shock.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry," he apologized profusely. "I thought you were asleep more soundly than that. I was just dabbing the water off... I-I didn't mean to wake you. I-"
Rose was speechless and blinked up at the unknown man in apprehension.
"I-I'm Rory. The Doctor asked me to look after you. I-I'm a nurse," he explained.
A smile had slowly grown over Rose's face as the man stammered and she was laughing by the time he had finished. "I'm sorry. I'm not laughing at you, I swear. I just used to tell the Doctor that 'every good doctor needs a good nurse'. Looks like he listened."
"Good nurses don't usually wake patients when they're supposed to be sleeping."
"I wasn't really sleeping. Just somewhere between awake and asleep, I think."
"Well, you probably should try... but no, you probably shouldn't if you have a concussion. What was the Doctor thinking? And I'm rambling again. Can I get you anything? Are you feeling alright?"
"No, I think I'm alright. Just... why is my hair wet?"
"Oh, you crashed into the swimming pool. Well, through the swimming pool, actually."
"Oh, right..."
"Wait, you were awake through that?"
"Hard not to be. It was a short trip. Long time coming, but almost instant once I got to it. Last thing I saw was the console."
"Yeah, that's where you ended up: the old control room."
"Old control room... Yeah, I suppose a lot of things I remember are old now," she lamented.
"You say it was a short trip, but the Doctor said you were from a parallel world. How does that work?"
"Complicated. Very complicated. What about you though? Where are you from?"
"England. Leadworth."
"Sorry, but... which one?"
"Which-? Oh! Which England? Right, I forget that's optional with the Doctor. Earth. 2011."
"Oh, I'm from around there. London 2005 is where I met the Doctor," she said with a bright smile.
"A-and where was it you ended up?" Rory asked apprehensively.
"Oh... well, that's a bit trickier, isn't it? Erm... I guess... The last time I saw the Doctor was in the parallel universe. We started calling it Pete's World. So, Dårlig Ulv-Stranden in Norway in 2010. Though for this universe it was just 2009. Complicated," she repeated.
"Wow, that really wasn't that long ago then, was it?" Rory said in surprise.
"The perception of time for the Doctor and those who travel with him is far different than the rest of the universe," she reminded him.
"Right, sorry."
"My bag!" Rose cried suddenly, quickly propping herself up on her elbows.
"Oh, we got it. It's here, beside the bed," Rory answered quickly. "It's wet though, is that bad?"
"No... No, it's fine," she answered, slowly laying back down. She stopped just short of her head touching the pillow when she caught a glimpse of red hair over Rory's shoulder. She leaned to the side and saw two women standing in the doorway.
"Sorry," Amy apologized when she realized they'd been caught. She started over toward the bed and River followed a few steps behind. "We shouldn't have been listening in, but we couldn't help it. I'm Amy, Rory's wife, and this is River."
"Professor River Song?" Rose's eyes widened.
"You know me?" River's eyes narrowed with suspicion and uncertainty.
"Er, sorry, no. I-I... the name. I've heard of you," Rose answered uncomfortably.
"From the Doctor?" River probed.
"Er... no. Maybe, sort of." Rose greatly regretted mentioning anything at all. There were far too many things to explain and she wasn't ready to explain it to anyone but the Doctor.
"Complicated?" River said with a distrustful edge to her voice.
"Yeah," Rose answered quietly.
"Hey, we don't mean to upset you. We're just wondering who you are, is all. The Doctor hasn't really told us much," Amy explained.
"And there are likely good reasons for it." The Doctor's voice shocked the room into silence and they stared at him as he leaned against the doorjamb. "This was one of the reasons I asked the Centurion to watch over Rose, so that he might protect her from the nosy females."
"Bad logic on your part," River piped in. "The Centurion's loyalty has always been to Amy."
"Yes, I can see I was mistaken as he's allowing you to give Rose the third degree," the Doctor said angrily.
Rory opened his mouth to defend himself but Rose spoke first. "It's okay, Doctor. They're okay."
"No, it's not, because it's none of their business. I get to talk to you first," he said firmly. "Everyone else out."
"Doctor," Amy started in an apologetic voice.
"Not now, Pond."
Amy bowed her head and slowly made her way to the door, pulling Rory behind her. River stood in the door frame for a few moments longer before closing the door behind her.
Alone once again, the Doctor sat down on the side of Rose's bed, staring into her brown eyes with so many questions in the depths of his own. She had felt at ease for a few minutes while talking to Rory, but alone once again with the Doctor, real life came flooding back to her.
"Y-you look younger again," she said quietly, hoping to lighten the mood.
"Rose," the Doctor asked anxiously, "why are you here?"
The dam broke suddenly and the tears began streaming down Rose's cheeks. "I don't know. I just didn't know where else to go," she wept helplessly.
"Oh no, Rose, don't cry. You know it destroys me to see you cry," the Doctor frowned. "Just... what happened? Where's... the other me? What...? Oh, just please don't cry."
Rose covered her face with her hands and pressed her fingers against the closed lids in effort to stem the flow, breathing deep and slow as she tried hard to regain composure.
"How long has it been for you?" she asked with a strained voice. "How long since you left us there?"
The Doctor swallowed hard and averted his eyes. "Two hundred years... give or take."
A laugh burst forth from Rose and she clapped her hand over her mouth, tears still present but stationary. "You're such a liar."
"What?" he asked in surprise.
"I can tell just by looking at you that that body can't be more than a hundred years old, tops. Plus, I have on good authority that it's between sixty and seventy." Hard though it was, Rose looked smug through her persistent tears.
"And just who is this authority?" the Doctor wondered suspiciously.
"One step at a time," Rose scolded. "How long?"
"Sixty-eight. Sixty-eight years."
"Now ask me."
The Doctor's brow furrowed in confusion and concern. "How long?"
"Thirty-three years," Rose choked up again. "What happened to my Doctor? I-I outlived him."
Rose dissolved into tears again, no longer able to keep them at bay.
"R-Rose..." The Doctor was speechless, his hearts falling out of sync for a skip. "Y-you haven't aged?"
She shook her head violently in response, hardly able to breathe, let alone speak.
"B-but... I-I don't... Rose..." He ran his hand through his hair as he tried to pull his thoughts together. It was useless. His mind didn't seem able to comprehend a single thing. "H-how? When? W-what?"
"We didn't know... not at first. We got married after only a few months." Rose paused as she looked down at the ring on her left hand. The ring looked worn on her youthful hand. "He took my name. Said he couldn't stand the thought of giving me the name 'Smith'. It wasn't real. 'Tyler' he said was real. Doctor John Tyler. Of course, everyone that knew him used his 'nickname' of 'Doctor'. We worked for Torchwood together and he was brilliant. He was always brilliant... in everything. We travelled often - natural sights and so many museums. He loved discovering all the differences between Pete's World and this one.
"People often told me I still looked so young, but we really didn't think anything of it. Not until nearly six years in. We-" Rose choked on the memory and the Doctor took her hand in his. "W-we were pregnant. Baby boy. I insisted on the name Jack, but he insisted just as firmly on 'anything but Jack'. The nursery was painted... But there were complications. Placental abruption. The baby was in distress and I was bleeding and we were on holiday, so far from a hospital. We were both in bad shape by the time paramedics got to us. And then it happened..." Rose's voice was unsteady, but she pushed through it. "Regeneration started. I could feel it. It was rising off of me. We were all terrified - the paramedics... Doctor... me most, I think. It burned and I didn't know what to do. Didn't know what I was doing... In my fear, I ended up pushing the energy into my unborn baby. My regeneration stopped and my baby was dead. I was fine... but my baby was dead."
"Oh Rose!" the Doctor despaired.
"I worked for Torchwood. The responses of my friends and co-workers..." Rose shook her head and the angry insults that were burning in her heart. "Torchwood was outraged and thrilled and terrified and so many crazy, crazy things. I was taken into custody only hours after losing Jack. Balances of power changed only hours after the incident and I was taken away to be tested. The ripped me away from my Doctor and I never got to bury my baby. They tested my blood and DNA. They tested my endurance, pain tolerance... God, just everything. Pushing just to see how much I could take before the first sign of regeneration. Then they'd stop."
Rose looked up from her ring to find silent tears in the Doctor's eyes.
"It took him forty-three days to get to me - my Doctor. He hardly slept and gave it everything he had to find me. I mean, he was just a man. No TARDIS, no sonic screwdriver, just a man looking for his wife. And he had to be careful himself, you know. He was still part Time Lord. He was lucky he got away before they thought to test him too. When he found me, he destroyed it. The entire building and everything... everyone in it. All the computers, charts, and tests. And then we ran. He did his own tests on me, gently." Rose's dark eyes glistened as she let them meet the Doctor's again. "Bad Wolf. It was the Bad Wolf. It changed my DNA when I absorbed the time vortex. I didn't even remember it; Doctor had to tell me what the Bad Wolf was. He called me 'human plus'. Instead of two strands of DNA, I have three."
"How did I not know this?" The Doctor's voice was tight and upon speaking, a single pair of tears sprang free. "How did I not...? Rose... I..."
"It's not something you look for, Doctor. Only two strands of my DNA are visible on non-temporally aligned scanners. How often do you break those out for friends?" she teased with a small smile. "W-we were okay after that. We didn't stop moving for nearly three years but then finally settled in South America. A cozy cabin in the mountains that overlooked Lake Titicaca on the border of Bolivia and Peru. It was gorgeous and quiet. Of course Doctor had reasons for the location though...
"The moment he realized that I wasn't going to age or die, he decided that I had to go back to you. And that's what he did. He set about a way to make it back here without putting a crack in the universe. It took him years, but he did."
"How...? You have to go through and you can't go through without making a hole," the Doctor quietly argued. At the moment, he didn't even care if she had shattered it to get back to him, but the puzzle was maddening. He'd puzzled over it for years himself. Not in dedicated study, but from time to time it would always work its way back into his thoughts.
"I spent years poring over the maths and diagrams with him, but I still don't really understand. The easiest way he put it was a balloon and a needle. Try to push a needle through a balloon and it will pop. But if you find the right place, with just the right give, a needle can easily slide right through. And with the right charge, the hole will seal itself."
"How long did it take him?" The Doctor asked, his face still marred with a frown.
"Six years to fully complete it, but he still tacked on another three to make sure he had perfected it. He... He said those three years were to perfect it, but I know better. He didn't really want me to leave yet. It was ridiculous that he thought I would. I loved him with all that I was and all that I had. I promised him 'til death do us part' and I meant it. It's been ten days since that day. His death certificate read sixty-seven, but he was still really fit. We knew he was dying. His heart had started giving out years before and his immune system was starting to fail. It didn't make it hurt any less.
"My baby brother, Tony... I love to call him my baby brother still because he looks so much older. He's thirty-five and I still look twenty-ish... I think more like twenty-four now. But yeah, he came out and helped me cremate my Doctor and we scattered his ashes on the lake, well, except..." Rose fiddled with a lace around her neck where a tiny bead housed just a pinch of ash.
"Tony went home and I just sat in the cabin, mulling it all over. Doctor told me not to wait. He told me to go find you as soon as he was gone, but... I didn't have any idea what to say. I... He expects you to look after me. He blames himself for the way I am, and by extension, that means you. He feels you should be responsible for me, but I want to make it clear right now, Doctor: Bad Wolf is me. I'm the way I am now because of a choice that I made. I don't expect anything from you. I only came because... because..." Rose's throat felt like it was nearly swelled shut from the effort of restraining herself. "I wanted comfort. Just a hug from someone who understands." Her restraint broke completely and her body shook with heavy sobs, her words slipping out wherever should could fit them. "I lost everything. I'm all on my own. Never aging. Watching them all grow while I stay the same. And they all wither and they all die. Mum died five years ago to cancer. Pete, last year. My doctor... I can't have friends. I can't even talk to people in the market because eventually someone in town will realize that I don't age. I have two nieces that I've never met because my brother can't tell anyone about me. No one even has pictures of me. No one but my brother even knew I existed. I just... I don't want to live anymore... It just hurts... all the time..."
"Rose Tyler, I never want to hear you say those words again," the Doctor whispered in her ear. At some point in her complete emotional collapse, he had taken her into his arms and was holding her tightly against his chest. "It does hurt. It's a terrible, terrible hurt, but it doesn't hurt all the time. I promise. There is so much worth living for."
"I know, but I lived for him for so long..." Rose wept against him. "I lost everything. It's like starting all over again. I don't... I don't know what to do anymore."
"Run," the Doctor answered. "When stopping hurts, you just don't stop; you keep going. When you feel like there's nothing left, you throw yourself into the universe and find out just how much there really is. When the pain feels so huge, go find something that makes you and your existence feel tiny. When you can't fix your own pain, go ease someone else's. And that's what we'll do, Rose. We'll run."
Rose shook her head vehemently. "You don't have to, Doctor. I really didn't come here for you to fix me. I... I..."
"You came because the Doctor... your Doctor wanted you to. He knew me... was me. And he knew that you are so precious to me. Now that you're here, Rose, now that you've told me, it would destroy me if you didn't stay here with me. I do know. Oh heavens, Rose, I know the pain. And we are going to fix it. We will. You'll see again that life is beautiful. So beautiful." The Doctor pulled her back and gently wiped the tears from her eyes. "Please, Rose, let me show you."
Rose smiled through the tears and nodded. He Doctor wiped her tears once more.
"Tears have their place, but I have a feeling you've had plenty lately and I'm going to ask you to stop for a little while, because you need some smiles. So... Rose Tyler, how do you feel about ice skating?"
"Haven't been in ages," she answered.
"Not the question I had asked, but I'll go ahead and assume that means you like it and you're in," the Doctor said brightly as he got to his feet. Rose saw the happiness in his smile and the sadness in his eyes. 'Just keep smiling until you feel it,' was the vibe he always gave off. She was about to give it a try herself.
"I'm in."
"Good, because I already told Amy and Rory I'm taking them there for their anniversary. They haven't travelled with me for months, you see. This is just a little date thing that River cooked up for them. And I'm rambling. I do that. You're always free to stop me from doing that because I really never know where I'm going with it when I start and I could seriously go on forever if given the chance. Though I'm never really given-"
"Doctor," Rose interrupted.
"Right. Thank you. Now... dressing gown. You need clothes, but we're not going to find them in here, so first step is a dressing gown." The Doctor pulled a fluffy white dressing gown from a shelf and handed it to her.
"What should I do with my bag?" Rose asked.
"I'm not sure. What's in it?"
"A big piece of the puzzle you're working on," she answered with a self-satisfied curve upon her lips. "Care for a peek?"
Without waiting for him to respond, Rose lifted the heavy black backpack onto the bed and unzipped it. Unable to contain his curiosity, he was instantly at her side. His eyes popped and his mouth hung open as he looked into the bag.
"I-it's... oh, it's beautiful!" he breathed in awe. "Donna's advice worked then, did it? Grow your own TARDIS..."
"Yes, she's growing beautifully," Rose agreed, gently stroking the rough coral with her index finger. "Not at the speed Donna had come up with because we didn't have those capabilities, but still twenty-six times natural speed."
"M-may I?" the Doctor asked tentatively.
"Not as she is," Rose answered apologetically. "She's still plugged into-"
"Oh!" he cried in excitement. "The puzzle! Your Doctor... Oh, wow! He's genius. Absolutely brilliant!"
"You see it now?" Rose beamed.
"Mother TARDIS and Baby TARDIS. This device here starts you off, but your Baby TARDIS helps you find your location."
"More like sisters," Rose corrected. "And it's the Big Sister that does most of the work. Little Sister cries out-"
"And Big Sister pulls her in almost magnetically! You didn't crash into the TARDIS, you were welcomed! Ha!" the Doctor clapped his hands in excitement. "That is brilliant. This is your 'good authority' is it? Oh, I can't wait to have a good look at this later."
"Back to my question: what do I do with my bag?"
"Let me hold her for you. We'll take care of her properly after ice skating." The Doctor zipped the bag back up and slipped the straps over his shoulders so that the bag was in front of him, his arms crossing around to cradle it like a baby. "Next stop - the console."
Rose threw the dressing gown on over the basic hospital gown she was wearing and tied the sash tight. After a casual flip of her damp hair, she nodded to him and he led the way back to the control room.
Rose stopped short and gaped when they came upon the three-level control room. It was so much bigger, brighter, and flashier than she had ever imagined it.
"Th-this is the control room?" she breathed in a stunned stupor. "Oh, it's incredible. Absolutely beautiful. Not that I would have changed a thing with the old control room-"
"Oh, I would've," Amy interrupted. "The other was so... dark and creepy."
Rose was startled when she noticed that Amy and Rory were standing on a staircase to her right. There were so many staircases...
"Oh no, I loved it," Rose spoke ardently. "It was the TARDIS as she really was - a bit of metal, a bit of coral, and the console - her heart- right at the center of it. This... This is showing off; like the ol' girl stepped into a pricey ball gown. It's... just wow."
"I know," the Doctor beamed proudly, as he leaned up against the console itself.
"Oh, you can quit preening over there you proud peacock. You can't have had anything to do with this design. It's far too Spock for you."
"Spock," he muttered with a sour pucker as he pulled the view screen towards him. "You and your Spock..."
"Spock? Is that in reference to Star Trek?" Rory asked.
"Yeah, sort of," Rose answered. "It's an old joke with us. See, when I first met him, he was pretty set in his ways. He was the Doctor and I was just along for the ride. Well, we showed up in London WWII lookin' for a spaceship and I asked him why he didn't do something Spock-like and scan for alien tech. He insisted that we just ask people. So while he's off asking people, I get found by someone else who is scanning for alien technology - in that time period, that meant my phone and watch. I didn't know what I was doing and had to bluff my way through. Couldn't hand out the name 'Doctor' so I called him 'Mr. Spock'."
"He still calls me that, you know," the Doctor butt in, obviously quite displeased by it. "Well, he introduced me that way to one of his 'friends'."
"You saw Jack?" Rose asked excitedly.
"Not now," he dismissed her as he continued his search on the console monitor.
"Anyway, that's not the funniest part. Not to me, anyway," Rose continued. "He was all about showing me that it's about people. In all of time and space, with all the gadgets, games, and fun, what's really important is people. And then he regenerates... new doctor. Well, not this Doctor, "she gestured to the man at the console. "This is the new, new doctor. Not my first doctor, not this one - the one between. He was more energetic than the last, still rude, and maybe a little spazzy..."
"I'm standing right here, Rose," the Doctor reminded her. She smiled in return and waggled her fingers in a small wave.
"The new Doctor was all about his little gadgets and scanning everything he could with his sonic. We physically came to a dead end once and he looked to me and asked, 'now what?' and I suggested we go talk to the neighbors and he called me domestic! As an insult! When it's what he would have started with in the past."
"I said, 'That's what I like about you - the domestic approach.' And I never said it was an insult," the Doctor replied.
"Is he really that different when he changes?" Amy asked with concern. "Is he really a whole new person?"
"Well... he's different, but no. He-"
"He's still standing right here," the Doctor cut in. "And he's having a hard time concentrating with people talking around him in the way that they are. Now where could it possibly be?"
"If you told us what you were looking for, we might be able to help," River suggested. Rose moved toward the center of the room and finally spotted River at a seat near the center console.
"Rose's room. It's got to be stored in the Holding Ring somewhere but I just don't see it. It'd be easier if it were alphabetical, but-"
"Rose's room isn't in the Holding Ring, sweetie."
"What do you mean?" the Doctor asked in surprise.
"The TARDIS has already restored the room on her own. It's directly across the hall from yours." River's tone was matter-of-fact, but the set of her lips and a glint in her eyes would tell anyone that dared to observe that she was not comfortable with the new arrangement.
"Oh, wonderful. Perfect. But wait..." The Doctor looked between River, Amy, and Rory with an accusing question stitched in his brow. "You...?"
"Yes, we peeked," Amy declared. "And I'm not ashamed."
"I am," Rory said quietly. "Sorry."
Rose touched the Doctor's arm, cutting him off before he could even start. "It's okay, Doctor. I would have done the same. When you don't give people answers, they go looking for them."
"So it would seem. More respect though, if you will. Rose is going to be sticking around. Full-time traveler again," the Doctor smiled brightly.
"Really?" Rory asked. "So nothing is wrong? No one's chasing her? We don't have to chase anyone?"
"No, Rory, we're going ice skating, if that's okay with you." The Doctor rolled his eyes then smiled back at Rose. "Let's go find your room."
The Doctor led the way up the stairs and down the hall, all while cradling Rose's backpack against his front.
"Oh god, it still says 'Bad Wolf' on the outside door!" Rose said excitedly.
"Just what is 'Bad Wolf'?" River asked. "I've seen those words before."
"It was a message. A warning that kept popping up," the Doctor explained vaguely. "I wrote it on her door as a joke. I wanted to be the one to write it. Just once."
Rose took a breath and pushed the door open. Her breath caught and she looked around with her mouth agape. It was exactly as she had left it back in 2007. They were just going to pop home to see her mum and run off just as fast, but the 'ghost' in her mum's kitchen changed everything.
Untouched. Her room looked untouched since that time. Every single thing was exactly where she had left it. There were dirty clothes on the floor, a clean outfit laid out on her hastily made bed, cupboard door still open, make-up still on the vanity.
"It's the same," Rose breathed quietly, with tears stinging her eyes. "Like only hours ago... Look!" She raced over to bedside table. "The fairy cake. The fairy cake from the 2012 Olympics with the little edible ball-bearings you were raving about. I said I'd save it for later and it's still here."
"I wouldn't eat that," the Doctor warned. "It's probably fine, but-"
"I'm not going to eat it, I just can't believe that it's exactly as it was. I-I... At the time, I never imagined I'd leave. Then for ages, I believed I'd never see it again. And now here it is. Exact. Exact in every way."
"No, no more tears, remember. Tears are done. Everyone out so Rose can get dressed," the Doctor ordered. "We'll meet you back in the console room in a few. Tear-free."
"Where are you going?" River asked the Doctor, following him down one of the corridors. "What is that in your arms?"
"It's Rose's bag. I'm taking care of it for now," he answered. "Oh, and I know how she broke through the TARDIS. She didn't."
"Sorry?" River asked irritably.
"The TARDIS actually locked onto her and pulled her through the vortex and through the walls, down to the old control room. It's why the walls were thin. It was cushioning her through each floor. It's how she wasn't injured."
"But how? How did the TARDIS lock onto her? Why?"
"Rose, like you, has a very unique relationship with the TARDIS," the Doctor explained. "There's something in her loyalty, purity, and passion that the old girl admires."
"And you?" River asked in a cold tone.
"And... what?"
"You seem to admire her quite a bit too." River's lips were pursed in barely contained anger. "Who is she, Doctor?"
"I told you, she-"
"She's Rose Tyler, a dear friend, yes. But how dear, Doctor?" River demanded.
"Very dear," the Doctor answered quietly. "Now, if you'll excus-"
"No. You still haven't answered me. I can see it, Doctor. She's not just another companion. How dear? Who is she to you?" River pleaded with him.
The Doctor stopped his trek and met River's eyes for a moment before looking at the floor in contemplation. "I thought I was never going to see her again. When you really believe something like that, it changes things... I don't know, River. I know what you're asking and I can't answer it because I really don't know. She's very dear to me."
"You did once though, didn't you? You loved her and might now?"
The Doctor sighed and cupped River's cheek. "Whatever I feel or don't feel for her has no bearing on what I feel for you. You know that. I'm sorry if that's not what you want me to say, but it's all that I can offer. You know what you mean to me."
"She's a child," River protested.
"She's a woman, not a child."
"Barely a woman. How old was she when you met her? How can you-?"
The Doctor placed his thumb over her lips to silence her and tears of passion gathered in River's eyes as she worked hard to restrain herself. "If you calculate maturity by years, you're all children compared to me," the Doctor whispered. "I'm sorry I can't give you the answer you want. You know I care very deeply for you and I ask you to be understanding with me. And if you can't be understanding with me, at least be so with Rose."
"With Rose?" River all but barked.
"She's not done anything to you. I ask that you don't do anything to her. She's going through a really tough time right-"
"Don't do anything to her?" River raged. "What kind of person do you think I am that you would have to ask me that? I may not be jubilant when speaking to her and I pried when she recognized my name, but I have not been belligerent with her. I'm not going to attack or shoot her or something. Is that what you think of me?"
"No, River, you know th-"
"Did you ask her the same thing? Did you ask her to be understanding or is she just too perfect? Or- OR does she even have a clue who I am to you?"
"River..." The Doctor gently placed Rose's bag on the floor by the wall and tenderly wrapped his arms around the weeping woman. "I didn't have to tell her who you are because she already knows."
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