Okay, I know I've said it and said it, but here it is again….I'm sorry. At least you get another chapter. And it's spring break so I have a whole week to write and that's what I plan on doing…As long as I'm not at work. So, please review! Also, please tell me who you think Alex should be with once again. I know you've most likely told me a hundred times, but I'm going to take a Tally.
Anyways, tanks go out to the following:

pokemonjkl - I know, but you can't blame the guys for overreacting. She did keep another big thing from them even after she let them know about her brothers and Fred.
zrexheartz - haha, you've got that right.
Jess Marylin - I can see where you'd think that. Thank you for pointing that out. It does seem that way, doesn't it?
TMNTluckygirl - You can been her best friend, just like you're one of mine! :)
WolfAssassin369 - Okay, thank you for letting me know.

Chapter 10

What a Croc

A couple nights after what happened at Coney Island, April had purchased another building where she could set up shop and create an apartment for herself and Alex. Alex was excited to get out of the sewers, though she really had grown accustom to the odd smell. Slightly. She had to admit, she would miss the guys being around her. It reminded her of when her brothers were around, however, she was still rather angry at them.

Alex hadn't spoken to any of the guys, including Casey and none of them made an attempt to go and talk to her. She didn't want that to be what tore them apart if anything ever did break them up, but she was just too mad at the moment to be the bigger person. Maybe when she cooled down a little, she'd go and talk to them.

April, being too excited about moving into her new place, couldn't go to sleep and just stayed up packing. So, since April couldn't sleep, Alex had to stay up and help pack too. Now, April had already spoken to Alex about what happened. She told the girl that she trusted her judgment, and that she was proud of her for seeing past the exterior of someone's shell. (Okay, no pun intended).

"Can't sleep either, huh?" April and Alex looked over to the doorway to see Mikey leaning on the doorframe, looking in on them.

"I'm too excited to sleep," April answered. "I can't wait to have my own place again."

"I understand," Mikey said. "I can still remember when this used to be my room, when I wouldn't have to listen to my," he moved to yell into the hallways, "roommate snore like a chainsaw!"

"Don't worry," April said once he came back in. "We'll soon be out of here and you'll be back in your own room before you know it."

"Um, April? What are you doing with my Silver Century comics?" he asked, seeing them laying on the ground beside some of their boxes.

"Oh, I needed something to wrap my stuff in and these were just lying about, so I-"

She never got to finish her sentence before Mikey scream. Alex just laughed, knowing very well that April didn't use them for anything. She had just stacked them into a neat pile for him. Alex had even put them in numerical order. Even when she was mad at them, she was still doing little things like that for them subconsciously.

April stood up laughing. "Calm down, Mikey. I'm joking. I know better than to mess with a guy's comics."

"Oh ha ha," he said with no humor in his voice. "Real funny, April." He started to walk out the door, shutting off the light as he said, "Enjoy your packing."

April turned to Alex and said, "Yeah, moving out's looking pretty good."

"I know what you mean," Alex said. She got up from her spot and went to turn the light back on.

"You still haven't talked to them yet?" April asked.

"No," Alex answered. "I'll just end up snapping at them again."
"Alex, you have to talk to them sooner or later otherwise you're going to lose them," April said. "And I know you don't want that." Alex didn't reply. April continued, "I don't mean to bring this up, but seeing as more and more of your friends are turning away from you, you can't afford to lose anymore friends."

She hated to admit it, but April was right. Her brother's were still missing, Fred was gone, Amanda and Arthur were no longer friends with her and now she was fighting with the guys. All she had left was Erik, Kiley and Emily. However, none of them were as close to Alex as they were with each other now. Ever since they all started to hang out, the twins and Erik had been getting along better than Alex and Erik or Alex and the twins. In a ways it was the third wheel, though it was a little more different than that. And the three of them weren't as close to Alex as the guys were. It was complicated.

So, that almost left her with nobody.

"You're right," Alex said with a heavy sigh. "I can't lose them too."

"Go talk to them," April urged. "I can finish doing things in here."

Alex stood up, unsure of what she was going to do. She excited the room and turned left, heading for Raph's room. However, she stopped when she heard him snoring and remembered what Mikey said. He was asleep and she didn't want to wake him up. That would just make him even angrier at her. She wouldn't have that.

Alex turned and made her way across the bridge, seeing Mikey and Don working on a project. She didn't want to interrupt their work either. She knew how Don got irritated when people messed with his experiments. She understood how that felt. She just continued past them and onto the living room.

However, as she approached the living room where Leo and Master Splinter were sitting from behind, Leo, without looking yelled, "Mikey, not now. We're watching this."

Alex sighed softly to herself. If they didn't want Mikey talking to them while they watched the news, they would feel no differently towards Alex, right? Instead of talking to anyone, Alex grabbed her jacket, seeing as it was getting colder out and left looking very dejected. The guys noticed her go when they heard the large stone door open. The exchanged looks when they saw her expression, but didn't do anything about it, afraid they would make her angry again.

Without a designation, Alex just wondered around the city on her won. Despite all of the warning about the turf war going on, she continued on her way. She didn't care. It wasn't like she couldn't protect herself or anything. She could handle herself on her own.

Suddenly, Alex stopped walking and just stood in the middle of the sidewalk. A question suddenly popped into her head that she couldn't quite answer. What am I doing with myself? How did I get here?

The teenage girl used to have caring parents, and protective older brothers. She used to have a job working at her family's dojo that she loved. Her grades were very good and she had good friends. She was happy. But everything changed.

Now, the girl was an orphan. Her brother's were gone. She no longer had their beloved dojo. Her best friend was gone and everything with her other friends were changing. However, her grades were still the same. And the mutant friends she had made weren't really speaking to her.

She was teaching herself what her parents showed her and her brothers. However, she found herself thinking that she was nowhere as good as she would have been if she was being instructed by her parents or maybe even her brother's instructions, though Alex's skills were better than her brothers.

Marcus, Nathan and Zack hadn't been as serious about their training as Alex was. When they were younger, thirteen or fourteen they had been, but Alex always been more dedicated and passionate about her studies, much like Leonardo. When they went out to hang out with their friends on weekends, skateboard or go to the mall, Alex would usually be at the dojo, training herself with her parents or on her own. It was more than just a hobby for her. It was a way of life.

A sudden drop was felt in Alex's stomach when she noticed the building before her. The building was going to ruin. Nobody inhabited it so nobody was taking care of it. The shingles on the roof were falling off, she could see several missing. The Japanese architecture had been vandalized why the Purple Dragons, no doubt. The dark green paint on the outside of the building was chipped and fading. It was creepy, to say the least.

Despite what her brain was telling her, Alex moved forward and snuck into the building through a window on the second floor that she knew for a fact never locked. The empty room she went entered into from the outside was trashed. Graffiti covered the walls and made her feel sick to her stomach.

This place had once been the most special place to her. It, it had been her bedroom. She would used to read, do her homework, meditate and practice her martial arts in there. And to see it in such disarray upset her greatly. Her bed had been over in the corner where several trash bags were, while her dresser had been where there was a hole in the wall. Trash littered the floors while little pieces of the ceiling had fallen off and onto the floor. It was heartbreaking to see the place she once called home looking the way it did.

Trying to push the sickening feeling that was building up inside her stomach, Alex pushed forward into her house. The hallway that her room, her parent's room and her brother's room were in didn't look much different from her bedroom. The place was trashed. Graffiti covered the walls, trash littered the floors. It wasn't anything different from what she had seen from her room. She guessed that the whole building would look like that.

She was bracing herself for what she was going to see. Considering how much her bedroom affected her, the rest of the place could have broken her. She couldn't stand to be anymore broken than she already was.

One of the main ways that Alex managed to keep herself together was by putting on a face and preventing other people from seeing how much things actually affected her. She didn't like it when people asked her, "Are you all right?" or "Did something happen?" or anything of the sort. That always made her flustered. She liked to pretend it wasn't bothering her and deal with it on her own.

However, there had been exceptions to that. When everything first started to happen, when her parents were killed and her brothers were missing, she cried with Fred. He had been there for her when they were taken. April was also one of those people who were there for her. Seeing April cry over her family was something Alex couldn't stand seeing. That had made her break down.

That had only been for about a week though. It wasn't as if it still didn't bother her, it did still, but she didn't let other see it bother her. She liked to be the strong one, to show no weakness. She liked to give other's strength by making them thing that she was strong too, despite the fact that she really wasn't. At least, not in an emotional sense.

Walking through the house not only brought back that bad memory of the night her family and her life was turned upside down, but also so many good ones. She could remember her family movie nights, Christmases, birthdays and sleepovers. Despite how bad that one memory was, there were so many good ones that overpowered it. She remembered them and tears fell down her cheek.

They were almost as bad as the bad one.

There were still some large pieces of furniture throughout the place that hadn't been sold, but had been vandalized. That got to her and made even more tear well up. However, she wasn't sobbing, just silently crying to herself. That all changed when she approached one area in the house though.

Right by the door to the stairs that went to from the dojo to the apartment was a large red stain on the carpet that had been impossible to remove without replacing the carpet. The stain was big enough for two people. That had been where she found her parents when she got out of the safe room that her brothers had forced her into for her own protection. That had been where they died.

Alex slid down the wall right next to where the stain was without removing her gaze from it. Her eyes were focused intently on that one spot, unable to remove them she started to finally sob. So many things were running through her head, yet, she wasn't really making any sense of it. She was just staring at that one spot on the floor. However, there were two things that did make it through her head.

Why us? Why me?

o0o

Alex opened her eyes slowly. It took her a moment to realize where she was. She was still at her old house. While she was crying, she had to have fallen asleep and tipped over. That was why she was laying on the floor. The girl sighed and was about to push herself up from her on her side position, but stopped and knitted her eye brows together when something shiny caught her eyes.

The girl sat up and then crawled over to the large hutch across from her. She bent down and reached under it, pulling out the small object that had caught her eye. It was a small little amulet. It was gold and about the size of a golf ball, but flat, like a coin, but a little thicker. She held it in her hand with the string handing down.

It looked so familiar. Then it hit her. Both of her parents had one. This…It had to have been one of theirs. She couldn't tell whose it was, but it didn't really matter. It was her parents. That was all that mattered.

Alex looked over at the stain once more, feeling the tears start to well back up. No, no, no, she told herself. I- I can't do this anymore. I can't start the next chapter of my life if I keep going back to read the last chapter. I, I have to move on. I can remember and use it as motivation, but I can't let this hang over me anymore.

I have to let go.

Alex stood up and put the amulet into her pocket. She would study it closer later. She didn't have time at the moment. No, she had to get back to the lair and talk to the guys. She wasn't going to erase them from her next chapter. No, she had to make sure they were in her story. She didn't think she'd be able to not have them in it.

o0o

Upon arriving back at the lair, Alex took off her coat and walked around, looking for her friends. However, as she walked around the place, she couldn't find anybody. Master Splinter wasn't even watching television like he had been before she left. Maybe they all went to sleep, Alex thought. However, she couldn't hear Raph snoring. Then she noticed that the craft Donny built was gone. I hope everything's all right, Alex thought.

Alex walked over to the couch and plopped down. I guess I could wait for them to get back. They shouldn't be gone too long, right? I can stay up.

She had been wrong. By the time that everybody got back, Alex had fallen asleep. She had curled up into a ball on the couch. That had been where the guys found her when they got back. However, she wasn't completely asleep. She was more half conscious, half asleep. She could hear everything they were saying and could comprehend it, but she was too tired to be able to move or say anything.

"Aw, ain't that cute," Mikey said.

"I wonder how long she's been there," Donny said.

"I have no clue," Leo said.

"Should we move her?" Raph asked.

"No, I don't think we should risk waking her. April says she hasn't been sleeping well," Leo said.

"Hey guys," Don said. "I just realized something. You know how we said Leatherhead was so lonely? Well, I thought that maybe Alex has been. I mean, think about it, we haven't spoken to her and her brothers aren't around for her. April told me that she hadn't been around her couple friends at school in order to make that Erik guy come to terms with what happened at Coney Island. The only really contact she's had with anybody is April. And she's been busy organizing everything for the new shop."

Who's Leatherhead? Alex asked herself. She found herself agreeing with Donny though, despite not knowing who they were talking about. Alex had only been talking to April. Her brothers were gone and Fred was gone. She hadn't spoken to Erik in order to make sure he was okay with who she was friends with; the enemies of the Purple Dragons. If they found out he was hanging out with Alex, they'd surly kill him. She didn't want that. Kiley and Emily were hanging out with Erik so they weren't around Alex. She really had been rather alone for the past couple of weeks.

Alex heard someone sigh. She assumed it was Leo, for he was the one to speak next. "We haven't been the best of friends lately, have we?"
"It's not like she has been trying to work things out with us either," Raph said.

"It's more our fault than anything, Raph," Donny said. "We did overreact."

"That guy did look like he was trying to help her," Mikey said.

"But he's the enemy," Raph said.

"Nnn," Alex managed to get out. She opened her eyes sleepily, but didn't get up. She looked up at the turtles around her. Raph was standing by the TV's, Leo was right next to her by the armrest, Mikey was on the floor and Don was to her left. "He's not a bad guy," she said.

"He's a Purple Dragon," Raph said.

Alex hesitated before continuing. She sat up, sitting partially on her feet that were on the couch while she leaned against the armrest. She shook her head and said, "I shouldn't be telling you this, I promised I wouldn't, but I don't see any other way to get you to see it. Erik is a good guy. The only reason he joined the Purpled Dragons was because he mother's sick and he needed the money for the bills. He's father baled on them a long time ago, so really right now he's the only source of income."

"How do you know that?" Raph asked.

"Because I started to tutor him before he was a member of the gang," Alex said. "I knew his mom before she got sick. Then life started to get hard when she did. He's made some bad choices, but he's a good guy and he's never done anything to hurt me."

"That's good enough for me," Mikey said. He stood up and yawned. "I'm going to bed."

"I'm tired too," Donny said. "Have a nice night guys. See you later, Alex."

"Night guys," Alex said to the two sleepy turtles.

There was an awkward moment as the three of them stayed as the other two left. Raph was still standing by the TV's with his arms crossed against his chest. Leo shifting his weight from foot to foot. He was the first to speak. "I must speak to Master Splinter. You two have a good night."

"You too, Leo," Alex said, while Raph kept quiet.

That left Alex and Raph alone together. Now, if Alex thought it was awkward to just have Leo, Raph and herself there, this was incredibly awkward with just her and Raph there. She shifted uncomfortably on the couch and looked around at anything but him. She almost jumped when the silence was broken.

"I don't like you hanging out with him," Raph stated. He was staring down at the ground.

"Why?" Alex asked. "I just told you that he's never tried to hurt me. I told you earlier that he even saved my life."

"I don't like it," he repeated. "They could find out and come after you or you could be dragged into something that could get you hurt."

Then it dawned on Alex. She stood up and slowly walked over to Raph, her arms wrapped around herself to keep herself warm. She was rather cold. "I think I get it," she said. "It's not really Erik, per say, it's that you're worried about me."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Raph said, turning to the side slightly so he wasn't facing Alex. "Why would I care?"

That almost stung. Almost. Alex knew that he was just defensive. Feelings like those were kind of like a sign of weakness. He was just embarrassed. Alex couldn't help but smile at that. "Because you're sweet," Alex said. She walked up to him and leaned forward. She planted a soft kiss on his green cheek. Before she pulled back she whispered, "I care about you too, Raphie."
Leaning back, Alex couldn't help but smile while she walked to the room she was staying in. She called out, "Goodnight, Raphael." With that, she went to bed.

Like I said, please don't forget to tel me who you want Alex with. Please...? :)