I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.
- Hippocratic Oath

*****

The plan had been exceedingly simple and yet would be ridiculously difficult to pull off. A medical identity had been created for all of them, Dr. Cuddy had ensured that their resumes were among those House selected for call backs.

They had all spent the past few weeks attempting to transform themselves into believable doctors. Needless to say, it hadn't been conducive to such a short time frame. The week-long medical course they had taken had been grueling; they had learned basic medical skills, how to take blood samples, debfibrillate, work an MRI scanner, and perform an endoscopy, among other things. After that they had been left to their own resources to fill their heads with diagnostic knowledge.

They had resorted to studying as a group, often working late into the night, pouring over medical textbooks and journals. Not to mention that they also needed to find every shred of available information about Dr. House, his methodology, and his patient history.

"There's a reason I didn't go to med school," Emily groaned, scrubbing a hand through her disheveled hair and yawning. They had been studying since noon and it was now nearing midnight. "I need another coffee."

Morgan flipped shut the massive immunology textbook in front of him after having read the passage on graft-versus-host disease five times and absorbing very little of it. "I honestly thought I'd never have to pull another all-nighter to study."

"I have no idea how we're going to pull this off!" JJ lamented, "There's no way he won't figure out that we're all a bunch of frauds!"

Rossi gave a loud snore, fast asleep, his head on the table. JJ nudged him and he suddenly sat straight up, looking about as if confused by his surroundings. His face was now emblazoned with a sketch of a tachycardic PQRST wave, pen ink having transferred from his notes to his cheek while he slept.

"You know," Reid thought aloud, "Dr. House might not even mind that we aren't real doctors, so long as we're able to correctly diagnose the patient. From what I've read he isn't really one to follow the rules. A few weeks ago, he was treating a victim of a building collapse; he didn't have a team, so he used a hospital janitor to bounce ideas off of..."

The anecdote was met with several half-hearted smiles. Sure, Dr. House may not care if they weren't believable, but they did. They didn't do anything half way, if they were told to be doctors, they were going to make sure that they could play the part of medical professionals.

"Okay, kid," Morgan glared, "You may already know everything there is to know about neurology, but some of us still need to study."

Emily poured everyone another cup of coffee, sloshing some of it onto the table , her movements uncoordinated from lack of sleep. "You should really go easy on the coffee," Hotch cautioned, "Your blood is probably half caffeinated by now."

She glared at him. "I need all the help I can get! You've got it easy! Sports medicine..." she made a noise of disdain, "When you have to memorize every hormone the body produces, then you can lecture me!" He shook off her snappish attitude; all their tempers had been running rather short as of late. "What's an epiphysis?" she asked suddenly.

"Growth plate," Hotch answered.

Her face buried in her hands, JJ's muffled voice moaned, "Information overload! I officially no longer remember my own name!"

Everyone was already reaching the end of their rope by the time they actually went undercover. They had all been burning the candle at both ends, going through the process of preparing for the case, brushing up on the case details, memorizing their cover, and cramming four years worth of medical school into several days.

******

When they had first arrived at the hospital, they had met with Dr. Cuddy, the only person privy to the real reason they were there. She gave them a crash course in hospital procedure, urging them not to hesitate to come to her with even the slightest question. She had warned them that House was abrasive and uncouth, to say the least; they wondered if anyone could possibly be as brusque as they stories they had heard made him out to be.

In the locker rooms, they had stashed their weapons and donned the white coats, exchanging the symbol of power that made them respected and feared as FBI agents for one that gave respect and trust as doctors. It was a heavy burden to bear, one that they were completely unfamiliar with and alarmingly unsure about.

As they met outside the lecture theatre, fastening hospital ID to their lapels and securing pagers to their belts, Hotch passed them each a red number sign, such as might be worn while running a marathon. They didn't voice their confusion over the unorthodox system, despite the inherent lack of answers to their questions. They didn't have to wait long though, because the second they entered the room they saw close to a hundred doctors waiting patiently for their chance to show Dr. House just how talented they were.

Morgan leaned in towards Emily and whispered, "Is this a good thing or a bad thing?"

A/N: Just a gentle reminder to please see my poll and give me an opinion about what I should do with the story. I'd really like to accomodate as many people as possible.