The day came when the second last rehearsal was underway. Adam was still worried about his two leads. They were just not working together very well.

'No, Hoss, Megan. You're both too stiff in this passage. You have to sound and look like you love each other.'

'And how do we do that, exactly?' Hoss didn't like Megan. He'd realized over the last couple of weeks just how stuck up and self centered she was. She often talked down to him and he'd done his best to smooth things but it wasn't working. He didn't think she was good at her part, and he didn't want to kiss her, as the scene demanded.

'You have to believe it in your hearts,' Adam said, as he paced up and down. It was two days before the performance, but Hoss and Megan were still having trouble with the intimate scenes. If the love between the two leads wasn't believable, then the whole thing fell apart in Adam's reasoning.

'Dadburnit, Adam. How do we do that when we ain't in love with each other really?'

'It's acting, Hoss. Pretend.'

'How about you show us?' Hoss watched his brother's frustration as he made the suggestion.

'Oh, all right.' Adam walked up to the front of the hall and moved into Hoss's position. 'Now, you watch me, Hoss.'

'Sure will, Adam.'

'And Megan, you have to be more desperate. You've just fallen in love with Romeo at first sight - so in love you're willing to die for him. You can't act it like you are reprimanding a disagreeable suitor. Do you understand that?' Megan glared at Adam.

'Of course I understand,' she sniffed. 'And just to let you know, I've decided I don't like you Adam Cartwright. You're bossy and overbearing. And I think I'm doing a brilliant job of my part. I don't need some country hicks to tell me otherwise.'

Adam sighed. 'Whether you like me or not, or Hoss or not is immaterial. The play is what's important. Are you ready to commit to Juliet?'

She sniffed and nodded slightly.

'Good. Now, let's try this passage, but with conviction!'

Adam took a deep breath, shut his eyes briefly then, when he opened them, they looked down onto Megan with a torturous, longing gaze. He started on the passage of verbal sparring between Romeo and Juliet at the party. His voice was deep, full of belief and totally focused on his Juliet.

'If I profane with my unworthiest hand

The holy shrine, the gentle sin is this

My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand

To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss'

Megan gasped at Adam's complete change into a realistic Romeo. She stumbled over her words.

'Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,

Which mannerly devotion shows in this

For . . .' She stopped and tried to remember her lines with Adam's dark eyes burning into hers.

'For saints have hands' Prompted Sally from the sidelines.

'I know!' Megan narrowed her eyes at Sally and continued.'

'For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,

And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.'

She was not at all believable as she recited the words in parrot fashion.

Even so, Adam continued.

'Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?'

Megan knew what was coming, and she didn't want Adam Cartwright kissing her. She was far superior in her opinion and she wasn't going to allow him any liberties.

'Ay pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.' She backed away and Adam sighed in frustration.

'Megan! You're not playing the part.'

'I don't like you, Adam Cartwright! And I don't intend for you to kiss me!'

'It's in the play. You have to! Just like you have to let Hoss kiss you.'

'No, I don't!'

'Look,' sighed Adam. 'Who's going to believe you two as Romeo and Juliet if you don't even kiss each other once. Now, get over it!'

'Humph!'

Adam doggedly continued the passage.

'O, Then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do!

They pray: grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.' Adam captured her in his arms. She tried to pull away.

'Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.'

'There move not while my prayer's effect I take.'

Adam moved down to within an inch of her mouth. Megan squeaked with surrender, and Adam kissed her deeply and thoroughly, sweeping her down into a classic pose.

Hoss turned red, the cast all chuckled and murmured. Little Joe giggled with glee from behind the backdrop. Sally gasped and dropped her copy of the script. The kiss went on and on, and soon Hoss wondered if he'd have to break it up.

Finally, Adam came up for air and released Megan. She was flushed and for a moment, looked unhappy that he'd stopped.

'Thus from my lips, by thine my sin is purged.'

Adam smiled smugly as he finished the line. He missed seeing Megan's hand coming out of nowhere. Her slap was hard and effective. Adam staggered back with the force and those who'd been chuckling roared into laughter.

It took Adam a moment to realize he'd been humiliated in front of everyone. He'd had about enough of Megan and her airs. He approached her with thunder in his eyes. Megan, who'd had a very satisfied expression on her face, soon lost it.

'That's IT!'

Hoss had seen that look in his brother's eye before. It usually came before a severe tongue lashing in his case, or in Little Joe's case, a tanning. Hoss hurried forward to save Megan.

'Now, Adam. Don't go gettin' all riled. Megan's a lady, remember?'

'She needs to be taught a lesson!'

'That may be, but-'

'-You can forget that, MR Cartwright! I'm leaving this production. And you can all suffer the disaster of an opening night without a Juliet.' She put her nose in the air and breezed past the company.

As she reached the door, she turned. 'What a bunch of pathetic inbreeds!' Everyone in the room, thoroughly sick of her whining, wished at that moment that they'd had something they could throw at her, such as rotten tomatoes. But they were rewarded as she stuck her nose so far in the air, she tripped on the uneven porch outside and landed in a dusty heap in the dirt. This time Adam's mouth pulled into smile.

'Well, thank goodness for that! Dave, one of the Ponderosa hands said what they'd all been afraid to say for days.

'That's that then, I guess. We cain't go on without a Juliet.' Hoss, actually disappointed, walked around the stage and kicked at one of the prop flowerpots. 'And Little Joe done went and sold all them tickets too. Them folks is gonna be mad.'

'No problem, Hoss. We have a Juliet.' Adam, suddenly feeling much more relaxed walked over to the sidelines.

'Sally? You know Juliet's part pretty well. How about you take over?' Sally gulped air as Adam asked the question. 'Hoss isn't as nervous around you as I think it will work out better than we planned if you'll do it.'

Sally smiled and walked up to Hoss. 'I'd be honored to play Juliet, Adam. Hoss is so good. We can practice all night if we have to.' She blushed pink and Hoss turned red at the idea. Sally didn't scare him. In fact, he really liked her.

'Good. Ah, here's Pa. We can do a full run through now!'

Ben, who'd been on business, apologized for being late but didn't comment on the change of leading lady. He'd hoped Megan might develop some kind of nasty disease before they had to perform. Ben wasn't normally unkind, but that girl had been a thorn in all their sides.

Adam was finally pleased after the last dress rehearsal. Hoss and Sally worked much better together. Everyone was impressed with the scenes they had together and they made the story much more believable. They were starting to gain confidence in their ability not to embarrass themselves beyond repair.

Ben came over to Adam as they finished up at the hall and prepared to ride home.

'Well, Adam. It looks like you've done it. I've never seen Hoss look so self-assured. He's doing really well.'

'Yeah, it's been worth it, don't you think Pa?'

'I think so, son. I'm just worried that the Ponderosa won't be there when we eventually finish this foolishness and get back to work.'

'Ah, Pa. It'll still be there. Work's always there! Besides, I know you're having fun. Did I see you and Kathy out buggy riding the other afternoon?' Adam raised a curious brow to his father.

'Er, well sort of. Not really. We had some lines to rehearse, that's all.' Ben suddenly hurried to ready his horse.

Adam crossed his arms and smiled knowingly. Just as Little Joe spied on Adam, Adam did a good job keeping an eye on Ben. He filed the knowledge away in his mind, to bring up at a later date. Once Hoss and Joe joined them, they all rode home in good humor.

Hoss was sweating bullets as the hall began to fill. The tights he wore clung to his thick thighs like a second skin and made him feel practically naked. When he'd found out about Joe's posters, he'd thrown his little brother into the water trough and grabbed Adam in a bear lock from which it took him twenty minutes to escape.

And only then because Hoss got hungry and allowed him up. After that, Hoss paced relentlessly in his room, worrying over the costume and whether he could go through with it at all. Sally's involvement had helped, but Hoss's confidence was crumbling as the time got close. As the hall began to fill, Hoss built his panic into a raging temper and refused flat to go on.

'Adam, I ain't goin' out there to be a laughin' stock. You ain't gonna make me!' Hoss jutted his chin in defiance.

'But Hoss, everybody's counting on you.'

'You don't need me. You know my part, you do it!'

'But then who'll do my part?' Adam had to find some way to talk his brother around. 'Look, Hoss, it's true, folks are going to be amused at the sight of you in these tights. But they'll laugh at all of us, not just you. Don't forget, I'm wearing tights too. So's Pa and the other fellas.'

'Yeah, but on you Adam they look good.' Hoss kicked at a chair that lay in his path.

'I wouldn't say that.' Adam looked down and grimaced. 'Hey, did you see Pa? He looks like a court jester in that funny hat Sally made for him!' Hoss started to grin.

'It's just a play, Hoss. It'll be fun. And you are good in your part. People might laugh to start with, but they'll like it in the end, I guarantee it.'

'Okay.'

Adam sighed with relief, then hurried around to check the last minute details. The only thing Adam ever wanted to direct again was a bunch of cows into a corral. They couldn't answer him back! Joe was behind the stage area, ready to change the backdrop and bring the various props in and out. Hallie was in charge of the hand held props, such as swords. They both smiled secretively to one another as they looked in their box of 'extra' props. It was going to be a hoot when they livened things up.

The number of people in the hall swelled. Soon, it was filled to overflowing and more people than tickets sold seemed to be jammed into every corner.

Adam looked out just before curtains and was suddenly frozen with nerves. What if they made fools of themselves? What if the audience hated it? Would they ever be able to show their faces in town again? All these questions converged into his mind as the church bells chimed eight in the distance.

Adam came out first to introduce the play. There was a wave of laughter and hollering from the crowd as they saw him dressed in costume. Adam just hoped Hoss hadn't turned tail and run out the back door at the sound.

However, once he made his opening speech, thanking everyone for coming and outlining the play, everyone seemed to settle down to watch. As he was leaving the stage, a lump rose in his throat as he saw Abigail Jones in the front row, waving at him. He scuttled off and made a note to make a quick getaway at the end.

Everyone clapped as each person they knew came on to act their part. When Hoss appeared as Romeo for the first time, laughter reigned. But then, as Hoss boldly spoke his piece, everyone quieted down to listen. Ben got a similar reaction, but his voice was loud and clear and everyone was impressed with how well they knew their parts. They got through the first half without a hitch.

They were up to the balcony scene when Little Joe and Hallie decided it was time for fun. Out of their box of tricks, Joe plucked a big green bullfrog. Just before Sally was due to go up the three steps they'd built to the little balcony, he hid the frog in a pot plant that sat on the balcony ledge. He snickered to himself as he raced back down. Hallie and he hid around the corner to watch.

Hoss came onto the stage a moment later. He walked across and stood beneath the raised balcony. He looked up and started his passage.

'He jests at scars that never felt a wound.'

Sally entered onto the balcony and everyone in the audience clapped.

'But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?

It is the East, and Juliet is the sun!

Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,

Who is already sick and pale with grief

That thou her maid art far more fair than she.

Be not her maid, since she is envious.

Her vestal livery is but sick and green,

And none but fools do wear it. Cast it off.

It is my lady. O, it is my love!

O that she knew she were!

Just then, as Sally looked out wistfully into the pretend night, the frog in the pot decided it would like a new home. With one enormous hop, it landed on Sally's shoulder and an ear-piercing scream echoed through the hall. Everyone in the audience erupted into laughter as she jumped up and down and hit at the frog to be rid of it. Hoss looked up, stunned for a moment. He instinctively said the next line.

'She speaks. Yet she says nothing. What of that?

Everyone laughed again at the irony of the line. Then, in a dramatic turn of events, the frog escaped from the noise and jumped down, landing unceremoniously on Hoss's head. Like a true professional, he finished the passage, complete with frog, much to the audience's delight.

Adam watched helplessly. He realized straight away who must have been behind it.

'Joseph!' He found his brother belly laughing in the corner behind the stage.

'Yeah, Adam?'

'You just go and get that frog off Hoss's head right this minute!' Adam chilled him with a angry look.

'Right now, in front of everone?'

'Yes! In front of everyone! Or you'll be mucking stables until you're thirty!'

Joe gulped but did as he was told, running out like lightning and snatching the frog down off his brother's head as Hoss bent down. The audience clapped the stage hand as he raced off again. Fortunately, it didn't distract from the scene as Hoss boldly continued. By the time Sally had to speak, she'd calmed down.

And when they'd completed the romantic scene, they got a hearty round of applause from the crowd.

They were all waiting for the kissing scene later on, and true to form, Hoss turned red as a beet before he kissed Sally. But they made a nice job of it, and the women in the audience let out a romantic sigh as they performed the task.

Towards the end of the play, woman were getting their handkerchiefs out and you could hear a pin drop as Hoss played a stricken Romeo who believed his beloved Juliet dead. Even Adam, who'd heard him play the scene a hundred times was moved as he watched from the sidelines. Hoss was always sincere, and he brought that feeling to the passage.

Sally lay on the cot that was part of Juliet's tomb. Joe had considered sawing the legs off to make it collapse as Hoss leaned on it, but now was glad he didn't follow through as even he became wrapped up in Hoss's final speech.

'Will I set up my everlasting rest

And shake the yoke of inauspicious stars

From this world-wearied flesh. Eyes, look your last!

Arms, take your last embrace! And, lips, O you

The doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss

A dateless bargain to engrossing death!

Come, bitter conduct, come, unsavory guide!

Tou desperate pilot, now at once run on

The dashing rocks thy seasick weary bark!

Here's to my love!

Hoss held the chalice up to his mouth and drank the pretend poison. All the women gasped.

'O true Apothecary!

Thy drugs are quick. Thus with a kiss I die.'

Hoss fell dramatically to the floor and a spate of crying filled the hall. Adam smiled triumphantly. It was all a success after all. Then, as the play moved on, and Juliet awoke from her faked death to find her Romeo really dead, the women cried even harder. Sally's final speech was heart wrenching and had everyone enthralled.

'What's here? A cup, closed in my true love's hand?

Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end.

O churl! Drunk all, and left no friendly drop

To help me after? I will kiss thy lips.

Haply some poison yet doth hang on them

To make me die with a restorative.

Sally leaned down and kissed Hoss's lips. Miss Jones wailed with tears in the front row!

'Thy lips are warm!

Juliet, upon hearing someone coming, snatched up a dagger lying beside the cot.

'Yea, noise? Then I'll be brief. O happy dagger!

This is thy sheath; there rust and let me die.

Sally dramatically took the fake dagger, raised it up and stabbed herself. She then slumped back onto the floor, falling across Hoss. A red ribbon flowed out, symbolising blood.

Everyone was crying now, even the men! Through the rest of the play, sniffles and sobs were abounding. When the final passage was spoken and the play ended, everyone erupted into applause. All the actors sighed with relief, and Hoss and Sally sprang back to life to lap up all the accolades.

It took a couple of hours to clear the hall after so many congratulations. It had been a total success and they'd raised much more than hoped for the church.

Ben and the boys were left to clean things up and along with a couple of the others were still there well after midnight. Ben, satisfied with his son Hoss's achievement smiled tiredly as he changed back into his work clothes. At least all this foolish play acting could now be forgotten and they could all get back to work.

When it was time to go, Ben, tired beyond caring, called for his sons to follow him home. Each was still caught up by their admirers. Hoss was deep in conversation with Sally and several other women that had lingered. He was telling them about his plans to San Francisco on his next holiday, and perhaps joining a theatre company.

Ben raised his eyes to the ceiling on that one. Miss Jones had Adam bailed up in a corner, gushing over the play and his achievement. Ben thought about rescuing him but he really was too tired. Besides, he really didn't care for Miss Abigail. Joe was throwing flowers to Hallie who was up in the balcony leaning over giggling.

Ben sighed. The ranch work was way behind. His sons were starting to control him in ways he'd never have thought possible. He had a feeling life would only get more complicated in the years to come. Shakespeare had it easy, he realized wryly. He'd only had one Romeo to contend with. Ben had three!

'Oh, Romeos?' He barked loudly. Each of his sons turned in unison. 'Wherefore art thou? Tomorrow, it's back to work!'

'Coming Pa.' He heard their obedient replies and smiled as he walked to his horse. Well, one thing for sure. Life at the Ponderosa was never dull.