Claimer of the dis- type: Owning of the Twilight does not exist for me

Claimer of the dis- type: Owning of the Twilight does not exist for me. Or Youtube. Or Candy Mountain.

Author's Note: Yay, we were gone for an epic day, but we're back.

And we also wanted to say THANK YOU, everyone! Seriously 540 reviews! Woo, when we started writing this, we only thought we'd get 100 at the very most.

You guys are ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! Thanks to everyone who favorited (72 people), everyone who alerted (75 people) and everyone who has told some else about this story. We're heard from a few people, they heard about this story from some else. It's incredible that you that you guys actually would tell some else about this. So thank you!

And also all the readers, even if you don't review, just knowing you would sit and read this is awesome thank you!

Ok, that was long. Now onward…

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Edward sat quietly with Bella, just staring at one another. He had challenged her to a staring match, knowing very well he could stare for forever without blinking, just so he could win.

Bella twitched.

Edward's eyes went wider. She twitched again.

Her eyes were closing, but she was fighting it. She wanted to win the prize, a free trip to Candy Mountain. She'd always wanted to go there ever since she had seen the magical video of it on Youtube.

The door slammed open, causing Edward to blink in surprise. He'd lost.

"EDWARD!" Edward turned to see Emmett in the doorway holding leashed animal. No, not animal. It was a bird. "LOOK WHAT I GOT!" He pointed to the bird.

"Emmett, what the heck is that?" Edward said angered that he'd lost the staring match and now there was a random bird in their living room.

"It's a peacock!" He smiled and jumped.

"And why do you have a peacock?" Bella laughed next to Edward.

"For peacock reasons…" Emmett's eyes were shifted from side to side.

"What kind of peacock reasons could you possible have?" Edward paused. "Oh wait, it's you."

"Well, I thought we could-" Edward cut off Emmett.

"We are NOT using that thing for Valentine's Day."

"Huh? Wait, why not?" Emmett looked incredibly disappointed by Edward. Bella looked back and forth in confusion.

"What does Valentine's Day have to do with this?" Bella asked.

"Nothing." Edward replied in a monotone voice.

The peacock squawked. "Well, actually I was thinking about giving this to Carlisle make up for the cat I ate." Emmett tried to persuade Edward into letting him keep it.

"First off, I think you mean cats." Edward corrected. "And you already tried to make it up to him. And remember how wonderfully that all turned out." He motioned to the box of now rabid kittens sitting in the kitchen next to Jasper, who was petting them.

"Nice, kitties." Jasper patted the one on the head. "Jasper like kitties."

"We really need to get him a day job." Emmett noted at they watched Jasper and the kittens. Edward and Bella nodded.

"So, besides giving it to Carlisle. What are you going to do with it? And were the heck did you get the darn thing?" Edward was trying very hard to stay focused, but there was a shiny collar around the peacock's neck, which was catching his attention a lot.

"One, Edward, it is him. And his name is Murphy. He get very moody went you call him 'it'." Murphy crocked out a cry. "It's ok, Murph." He patted his beak.

"And to the rest of your meaningless questions, because the answers are right in front of you, you're just being stubborn." Emmett continued. "Hmmm…maybe I could train it to talk like Pump n' Dump and the pandas, then he could write songs that hit the top ten on the charts."

Edward looked as confused as Bella at this point. "Emmett, how do you always seem to end up with extremely talented animals? Example, the pandas that created PandaSoft."

"Which I might add." Bella jumped in. "Keeps making my BAC (A/N: Bear's Awesome Computer) freeze."

"Jasper taught the pandas. Hence they're so defective." Jasper heard in the next room. Lifting his box of rabid kittens and carrying them into the living room.

Upon setting down the box, Jasper aimed the kittens at Emmett. "Get him." The kittens attacked.

"Ahhhh!" Emmett screamed as a box full of cute and cuddly kittens maimed him.

"What did you say about my defective pandas?" Jasper stood menacingly.

"They were very not defective, they were very fective!" Jasper shrugged.

"Close enough." Jasper waved his hand the kittens hopped into the box. He picked up the box and left.

"So…" Edward gazed around. "The peacock?"

"It's from the zoo. I thought he was adorable like Cedric Diggory, so I kidnapped him and took him home as a pet."

"That's it." Edward smiled. It was then that Edward noticed that Emmett's eyes were nearly completely black. "You're going to eat it, aren't you?"

"Umm…DON'T JUDGE ME!" Emmett scurried off.

"Edward?" Bella's voice was quiet. "What happens with a peacock on Valentine's Day?"

Edward smirked, while standing and left the room. Bella, still confused, decided to ask Alice later.

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VALENTINE'S DAY

"Got the peacock?" Jasper nodded to Edward's question. "Good."

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Author's Note: What do you think they do with a peacock on Valentine's Day? 'Cause I have no idea….lol!

This was for DamnThoseDazzlingCullens. Sorry if it was bad.

OH MY GOSH! LESS THAN 24 HOURS UNTIL BREAKING DAWN! (passes out)