If the Doctor was surprised to see Jack in the control room of the TARDIS, he didn't let it show. He watched the immortal man wander in, clutching his blanket tightly. The Doctor didn't know what was wrong – the TARDIS had stopped him from listening in – but he knew it was something profound.

"I have to go," Jack said abruptly. The Doctor raised an eyebrow.

"Go where, Jack? We're in the vortex."

Jack looked directly at him, then, and the Doctor could see the renewed clarity in the other man's eyes.

"You can land her. Please, Doctor. I have to go."

"You explain why you suddenly need to go, and I'll consider it."

Abruptly, Jack's face crumpled, and the stoicism that had lent itself to give him an air of renewed maturity vanished.

"I'm bad, and Yan doesn't want me anymore."

He began to cry, unable to contain his grief any longer. The Doctor strode over and embraced his distraught companion, hugging him close.

"All right. I'm it's not as bad as you think."

"It is," Jack choked out. "I told the metal men where Lisa was. I did a bad thing and Yan hates me now. He... He said he couldn't be in the same room as me. I tried to say sorry, but he said that wasn't good enough!"

The Doctor cradled Jack's head against his shoulder. Over one hundred years of adult memories, and they were all warring against the personality of a child.

"He doesn't hate you, Jack. He may be angry and upset with you just now, but he doesn't hate you. Yes, you did do a bad thing..."

Jack uttered a muffled sob and tried to pull away, but the Doctor refused to let him go.

"Now, stop it, Jack. Just listen. It was a bad thing to do, but not unforgiveable. Ianto will forgive you, but you need to be patient and give him time. Did you hear me, Jack? Ianto doesn't hate you, and he will forgive you."

"Mum didn't."

The Doctor's breath caught in his throat.

"What do you mean?"

"When I lost my little brother Gray to the monsters, Mum never forgave me."

"Oh, Jack," the Doctor whispered as Jack began to sob afresh. "How old were you when that happened?"

"Th... Thirteen..."

"You got your memories back well and truly, didn't you? The bad as well as the good."

"It hurts," Jack sobbed. "I want it to stop hurting."

"I know, but believe me when I tell you that running away won't help. You need to stand up and take responsibility, just like you did during World War II, when Rose and I first met you. You remember that now, don't you?"

"Yes," Jack whispered. "I... I remember you were so angry at me."

"And I forgave you. Do you remember that as well?"

Jack stared at the Doctor, hardly daring to hope.

"Will he really forgive me?"

"Yes, I believe he will. Just give him a chance. Now, do you still want to leave?"

"No," Jack admitted. "I just... I thought Yan was going to..."

The Doctor nodded in understanding.

"You thought Ianto would leave, so you decided to get in first. You thought it would hurt less if you left him rather than him leaving you."

"Yeah," Jack agreed sheepishly. "He said he wouldn't have, but I was scared he might anyway."

"Jack. Has Ianto broken a promise to you yet?"

"No."

It was said without hesitation, and with absolute certainty. The Doctor smiled faintly.

"There you are, then. Now, I think perhaps you and I could do with a bit of fresh air."

"Are we going to the garden?" Jack asked. A grin lit up the Doctor's face.

"No, I think I'll do as you suggested, and land the old girl. Got the perfect place in mind. Lovely little planet, totally uninhibited and won't be discovered until the sixty-third century. It has a gorgeous beach... Jack? What's wrong?"

Jack trembling, and there was a haunted look in his eyes that made the Doctor's hearts ache.

"Can we go somewhere without a beach? Please?"

The Doctor reached up and brushed his fingertips over Jack's temple. He was immediately bombarded by images to give anymore nightmares.

"When your brother was lost?" he inquired gently, and Jack nodded tearfully. The Doctor sighed. "I'm so sorry. All right, we'll give the beaches a miss for now. I'll find somewhere else. Maybe somewhere with a nice market, so Rose can do some shopping."

Jack moved back to sit on the pilot's seat, and watch as the Doctor worked the complex controls, all the while muttering manically to himself. He remembered this. Granted, the Doctor had a different face, but the feeling of watching the Time Lord in action was the same. It was comforting, somehow.

"Jack, would you like to help me?"

Jack looked startled, and just a little bit hopeful.

"Can I?"

"Of course. Don't you remember, you always used to."

Slowly, Jack joined him at the controls, and the Doctor indicated a particular panel.

"That one, right there. I showed you how to use it. Do you remember, or would you like me to go over it with you again?"

"No, it's okay. I remember."

He did, and the Doctor watched him with a fond smile as Jack began to manipulate the controls in front of him. After a long moment, Jack became aware that he was being watched, and looked up nervously.

"Am I doing it wrong?"

The Doctor grinned broadly, and the enthusiasm he projected coaxed a tiny smile from Jack.

"You're doing it perfectly, Jack. Just perfect."

They landed the TARDIS with the lightest of bumps, but it was still enough to bring Ianto and Rose to the control room. As they walked in, the young Welshman locked gazes briefly with Jack before pointedly looking away.

Acutely aware of Jack's disappointed expression, the Doctor spoke enthusiastically.

"Arthemix Five. Lovely little planet. Miles of scenic gardens, plus one of the biggest markets in the galaxy. Best of all, it's perfectly safe. We've landed some time during the forty-fourth century, and war won't find this place until the fifty-eighth."

Rose, Ianto noted, looked sceptical to say the least.

"Are you sure about this? It's just, you were the one who said we were better off in the vortex."

"Trust me," he assured her. "Now, funds for the day..." He pulled three slim, silver discs from his pocket and buzzed his sonic screwdriver over them before handing one to Rose, one to Jack and the third to Ianto. "There, that should give you all plenty of credits for spending. Now, shall we?"

The Doctor took Rose's hand and led her out through the doors, deliberately leaving Jack and Ianto to follow at their leisure.

Initially, neither man spoke. Then, with all the certainty of a frightened child, Jack held out a trembling hand to Ianto.

"Yan? Please?"

Ianto hesitated. He and Rose had been talking prior to the TARDIS landing, and he had calmed down significantly, but he was still upset and angry. All the platitudes in the world weren't going to change the fact that Jack had caused Lisa's death. He might have been the one to take her life, but Jack's actions were what had placed her in that situation to begin with.

Even so, he knew how vital it was that Jack knew he wasn't going to be rejected, or abandoned. With that solely in mind, he reached out and took Jack's outstretched hand in his own. It was a testament to Jack's improved mentality that he didn't take the gesture as evidence that all was well between them. Instead, he offered Ianto a weak smile.

"Thankyou," he whispered. Ianto regarded him solemnly.

"I'm still upset with you, Jack, but I'm not going to leave you, either. But you have to give me time."

"That's what the Doctor said," Jack admitted. Ianto regarded him thoughtfully. He could see the innocent child-like side of Jack's personality, but now there was another side as well. In Jack's eyes, Ianto realised he was starting to see the man who had been hidden away for so long.

"C'mon," Ianto told him quietly, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "Let's go and see what's out there."

The Doctor seemed to have nailed the landing. The TARDIS had set down in the middle of a lush and peaceful garden that was awash with brilliant colour, the likes of which Ianto had never seen before. At a glance, he didn't recognise any of the plants or flowers, but that went almost completely over his head as a tall, elegant creature with four arms and multiple tentacles walked by.

"My god... We're really on another planet..."

He felt a slight tug on his hand, and looked around at Jack. The older man looked anxious, and just a little bit frightened. Ianto wondered whether that was a result of their recent fracture, or the fact that the Doctor and Rose were out of sight.

"What is it?" he asked, trying and not quite succeeding to keep his tone neutral. Jack winced ever so slightly, but Ianto couldn't bring himself to offer reassurance. Not yet.

"Market," Jack offered, his expression crestfallen. Ianto looked, and sure enough, in the distance, he could see multitudes of colourful stalls as far as the eye could see.

"Do you want to go and have a look?" Ianto asked, and Jack nodded. The motion was subdued, but Ianto could see the eagerness in his eyes.

"All right, let's go. But you stay close to me, do you hear? No wandering off, not for any reason."

It seemed a moot point from both their perspectives. Jack had his hand in a death grip, and didn't seem to be willing to let go any time soon.

After making a mental note of where the TARDIS was, they headed off towards the market.

Ianto's head was spinning. They'd wandered around for a little over an hour, and barely covered a fraction of the market. It was, Ianto mused, not unlike visiting Costco in London, only the wares on offer were so much more exotic and interesting.

He saw some familiar items, having handled some during his stint in Archives. Most, he was amused to discover, Torchwood had gotten drastically wrong in their categorisation. One in particular that had been classed as a lethal weapon and sent to Secure Archives was, according to a very matter of fact vendor, a popular thirty-seventh century sex stimulant. When the vendor had offered them a free, single-use sample, Ianto had decided it was time to move on. Jack hadn't protested, but Ianto could have sworn he was disappointed.

Now, they sat back in the gardens, with a selection of food that, to Ianto, had at least looked palatable. Despite Jack's insistence that the green and purple spotted mashed potato wannabe was 'good, really good' he just was not feeling adventurous enough to try it. And so Jack had the bizarre concoction to himself, while Ianto made his way almost daintily through what was effectively a four-tiered sandwich. He didn't know what the fillings were, and had decided he was probably better off not knowing.

Jack was conspicuously quiet. Despite Ianto's best efforts to ignore him, he couldn't help but be aware of his presence. Ianto shut his eyes and let his head roll back a little, under the pretence of enjoying the warmth of Arthemix Five's two pale suns that shone down on them. Part of him wanted nothing more than to turn around and wrap Jack up in a ferocious hug, and tell him that he forgave him and every was all right. It just wasn't that easy to do that time. He knew Jack was hurting, but then so was he.

He had been placed in the untenable position of having to take a life, and right at that moment he simply couldn't see past the bottom line that Jack's actions had ultimately placed him in that position, and in the end, that was what he was really having trouble forgiving.

The tension was now palpable, and a surreptitious glance told Ianto that despite his initial enthusiasm, Jack was not actually eating much of his lunch. He felt a further touch of irritation at the perceived wastage.

"Jack, if you don't intend on eating that, then you shouldn't have bought it."

He spoke perhaps a little more harshly than he'd intended, and Jack's face fell even further. He turned away from Ianto, and began to shovel the food into his mouth so quickly that Ianto was genuinely afraid that he was going to choke himself.

"Jack, stop! You'll make yourself ill! Look, I'm sorry for snapping. Please, just stop, before you choke!"

Slowly, Jack set the plate down on the grass, and his hands came to rest in his lap. He made no effort to turn back to Ianto, though, and the Welshman was sure he could see the tell-tale tremors rippling through his body as he struggled not to cry.

Aware that the onus was now on him to do something about the fracture in their relationship, Ianto spoke in a low and careful tone.

"Jack, do you understand why I'm upset with you right now?"

Jack's head nodded quickly.

"I killed Lisa."

"Not directly, but what you did led to her death. Worse than that... Jack, you put me in a position where I had to take a life. Lisa was still alive when we found her. She was in agony, and there was no way to save her. She begged me to kill her, and I did. If you hadn't done what you, I wouldn't have had to do that. I wouldn't have her blood on my hands. That is why I'm so upset."

Jack's breath came in a short gasp.

"I made you...?"

Ianto heard the dawning horror in Jack's voice as he began to comprehend Jack's words. A choked sob followed.

"I... I am bad..."

Ianto wanted to weep, partly out of frustration and partly in grief that Jack really seemed to believe that he was a bad person.

"No, you are not! You're not a bad person. You did something that was bad, but that does not make you a bad person."

"But you don't like me anymore," Jack said in a small voice.

"Oh, Jack," Ianto murmured. He shifted around and slipped his arms around Jack's shoulders. "I do. I love you. I wasn't lying when I told you that, and it's not something you can just turn on and off, no matter how mad you are. I may be upset and angry, but that doesn't mean I don't love you anymore."

Confusion filled Jack's face, and he looked at him with swollen, tear-stained eyes.

"How can you love someone when you're angry at them?"

"Quite easily, love. And I promise you that I still love you very much."

Tears spilled freely down Jack's cheeks as Ianto embraced him.

"I'm sorry, Yan. I'm sorry about Lisa. I just wanted her to stop saying those things. She was like those nasty people that hurt you, and I just wanted her to stop!"

"You mean like Burke and Brandon?"

"She called me a freak like they did," Jack told him in a muffled voice. "She said you didn't really love me, and that she was going to make you forget all about me. She couldn't do that, could she?"

Ianto felt an unpleasant chill race down his spine. Lisa had worked in Research, and had been helping to develop new and more effective versions of the drug Retcon. It was entirely possible that she might have been thinking of that when she said that to Jack.

"No," he murmured finally, as much for his own peace of mind as it was for Jack's. "No, love. Nothing could ever do that."

Gradually, Jack pulled back out of Ianto's embrace.

"Are you still angry at me?"

Ianto considered that for a long moment before shaking his head and pressing a chaste kiss to Jack's lips. He could taste the other man's tears, and it just about broke his heart.

"No, cariad. I want you to promise me, though. The next time someone... anyone tries to tell you that I don't love you, don't believe them. I do love you, and nothing you do... nothing you've ever done will change that."

The hope in Jack's eyes was almost painful to look at, and Ianto couldn't help but wonder when else in Jack's life he might have been betrayed and abandoned by someone he had believed to love him.

"Promise?" Jack asked, and Ianto sealed his promise with another lingering kiss.

"I promise I'll always love you, fy cariad. Now, how about we finish our lunch, and then go and have a look at some more of the market?"

Jack's face lit up again, finally, and he once more began to eat – albeit, at a more sedate pace. Ianto watched him in relief for a moment before finishing his own lunch.

to be continued...