Dean coaxed Cas awake a few hours later with gentle kisses. The earlier conversation was weighing heavily on his mind. He remembered bits of the conversation from when he had been high too, though he suspected Cas had mostly been indulging him. There was no way they would be able to get even one kid. He watched Cas blink back into consciousness.
"What happened?" he asked, voice still thick with sleep.
"Pretty sure you fell asleep," Dean whispered.
He moved the open book from Cas' chest to the nightstand, careful to mark the place.
"Crap. You okay?"
"I'm fine. Told you I would be."
Dean leaned over Cas, kissing him. His hand sprawled against his waist. He pressed down, enjoying the feeling of Cas' body against him.
"I love when you don't wear clothes."
"Don't know why you bother," Cas responded.
Dean buried his face in Cas' neck, mouthing and biting at the skin. Cas skimmed his fingers underneath the t-shirt Dean was wearing, feeling the warm skin there. He leaned back down, pressing their lips together. Cas' hot breath rushed against his mouth and he groaned as Cas sucked on his lower lip, biting down, then soothing the sting with soft kisses. Dean threaded his fingers through Cas' hair. His hands gripped Cas' shoulders.
Cas' fingers dug into his waist, and his kisses were becoming open mouthed and sloppy. Dean could feel Cas getting hard against his hip. He pulled away gasping for air. Cas was suddenly everywhere, hands running over his torso, tweaking a nipple, mouth pressing at his shoulder. Before he knew it Dean was lying with his back on the mattress.
"Fuck, Cas. Remind me to wake you up from naps more often."
"Shirt off," Cas growled.
"Yeah. Yeah, okay," Dean said quickly.
Cas pulled back, giving Dean just enough space to pull the shirt over his head before resuming his assault. He gave another open-mouthed kiss, tongue flicking out just enough to get the taste of Dean's lips before mouthing down his neck, and sucking a bruise into his collarbone.
Dean let out a low whine, arching into Cas' touch. His hands flew up, nails digging hard red lines into Cas' back. Cas kissed his way down Dean's body, pausing to suck a nipple into his mouth.
"Holy fuck! Cas!"
"I got you, Dean," Cas said.
He sucked another bruise into Dean's stomach, before hooking his fingers into the waistband of Dean's boxers. He didn't need to nudge Dean to get him to lift his hips. He pulled them down and waited for Dean to untangle his feet and kick them to the end of the bed.
Cas pressed his nose into the gold-brown hair just below Dean's belly button inhaling. Eventually Dean's erection poking him in the chin got his attention. He brought his hand down, wrapping it around, digging his thumb into the slit. He brought his hand to his mouth and spit into his palm.
He moved to mouth at Dean's hipbone as he stroked. He ran his teeth along the edge, nippingthe top and bottom, making Dean arch up into his hands. He stopped and Dean made a whine of protest.
"Just getting a little more comfortable," Cas said, moving to settle between Dean's legs.
Dean's hand stroked his side, partially in comfort and encouragement. Cas intertwined their hands before settling in, and kitten licking the head of Dean's dick. Slowly he began to inch his head down the shaft at every bob of his head. He made sure his tongue was covering his bottom teeth, not wanting to over-stimulate Dean just yet, ever so lightly along the top, tracking the veins he knew he'd be able to see. Dean let out a little gasp above him. Cas loved working him apart like this, removing his inhibitions piece by piece until Dean was practically screaming with pleasure.
Cas grinned, knowing his exact plan, how to get Dean to open up. He hoped that what they had talked about earlier got Dean as worked up as Cas thought it might.
He worked down, finally licking at the base, before takingone of Dean's balls into his mouth, rolling it, sucking gently. He palmed the other one, before moving his hand back to stroke at his perineum.Cas felt Dean's cock twitch above his nose. He let his finger lazily circle Dean's hole. He kept up a pattern, switching every once in a while.
"Come on, Cas. Do something." Dean whined.
Cas was glad Dean was playing right into his hand.
"What is it you want, Dean?" Cas said, trying to keep a teasing lilt to his voice.
"Want you to fuck me."
Cas reached for the lube, clicking it open. He smeared a glob of the sticky liquid on his fingers.
"You remember what you said when you were high?" Cas demanded as he slipped a finger into Dean.
"Yes, yes. Cas, please."
"Bet you wish I could actually knock you up, don't you? Make the decision easy- one little slip-up and then the whole problem would be solved."
"Cas, fuck."
Cas glanced up at Dean, realizing his boyfriend was actually getting off on it- the thought of having his own children. Discovery of that particular kink aside, Cas realized now was the perfect time to get him keyed up enough to want to talk about it later.
"Yeah, you'd look so pretty wouldn't you? All big and glowing with our baby. You want that, Dean? You want me to put a baby in you?" Cas inserted a second finger, starting to scissor him open in earnest.
"Fuck Cas."
Cas bit at Dean's collarbone, watching his teeth leave little pink indents. He worked a third finger in and used his free hand to stop Dean from trying to thrust down. He quirked a finger carefully, searching, knowing he found his mark when Dean arched. He worked the spot, stopping long enough to thrust his fingers in and out a few times. He knew Dean was worked up beyond comprehension and that was exactly Cas' intent.
"You haven't answered. Is that what you want?"
"Yes, Cas. I fucking want kids, alright? Just fucked me already!" Dean exclaimed with a gasp.
"I got you, Dean. Always will," Cas whispered low. He knew better than to take anything Dean said right now at face value, but it was worth a shot.
Cas ignored the squelch as he pulled his fingers out of Dean and wiped them on the sheets. He circled the stretched opening once, twice. He leaned down over Dean, kissing him deep and thorough.
"Wish we could actually have them, that I could really carry them."
"I know. I know. Gonna fuck you now," Cas said, careful to keep his voice low and worshipful. Tears were brimming in Dean's eyes and Cas wondered if he had pushed too far.
Dean pushed his hips up, and Cas felt Dean's prick rub against his own. "Make me think you could put ababy in me, Cas," he whispered.
"Alright."
Cas pulled him into another kiss, licking along the seam of his lips the time, flicking his tongue against the roof of Dean's mouth, in a move he knew drove Dean crazy.
This wasn't something they had done before. They had done a lot of things in bed- bondage, role play, a little of this, a little of that, but this was the first time something like that happened- one of them asking for something during sex. Cas was half-tempted to pull back and insist they talk about this newfound kink of Dean's.
He thought better of it, however, when he realized that questioning it right now would probably make Dean put all his protective walls back up. They would talk later. Cas had to think fast – figure out what he was doing as he did it and that had never been his strong suit. He interested himself in nipping at Dean's shoulder as he got control of himself.
"You sure about this? Can't take a baby back, Dean."
Dean's hand went up to cup Cas' cheek. "I'm sure. Wouldn't be here otherwise. Please, Cas."
Cas got the message. If Dean wanted slow and tender he would get it. He grabbed the lube bottle from where he had dropped it on the bed.
"Alright," Cas said, keeping his voice close to a whisper. "Let's make a baby."
Cas flicked the lube bottle open, squirting some onto his fingers. He nudged Dean's thighs a bit further apart and made sure he was still loose. He teased the rim, pushing a finger just barely in and out, determined to keep Dean worked up. It didn't take long to get Dean arching into him again.
"Cas, please."
"What?"
"Fuck me."
"Alright. Alright. You've been patient."
Cas lubed himself up and tossed the bottle to the side. He was pretty sure he heard it hit the floor. He tugged Dean's legs onto his shoulders and lined up. He pushed in, resisting the urge to just snap his hips forward. A slow, agonizing moment later Cas bottomed out, balls flush with the curve of Dean's ass.
"You okay?" Cas asked.
"Feels good. Move."
Cas did as he was told, finding a rhythm. Dean moaned, hips matching his thrusts.
"Uh, faster," Dean pleaded. "Please."
Cas moved his hands to Dean's hips, gripping hard enough that he was surprised it didn't hurt. He pulled back and snapped his hips forward before settling into a new rhythm.
"Can't wait to see you, stomach all round. Feel kicking from inside you. Gonna be my pretty boy, aren't you?"
"God, Cas, yes. Gonna be so good. Make you a good baby."
"Yeah. Be such a good daddy too, won't you?"
Cas reached for Dean's cock, wrapping a hand around it.
"Uh, God. Yes. Gonna get all big for you. Gonna stop using. Have a healthy kid."
"That's it. Good boy."
That was all it took. Cas felt him clench around him, and him spurt warm over his hand. A few more thrusts and Cas was going over the edge too.
Cas wasn't quite willing to pull out yet. He ran his hands down Dean's flank, soothing. Dean was heaving under him, trying to get his breath. Dean returned the favor, hand resting on the small of his back, anchoring him to earth. Eventually, Dean could feel Cas pulsing soft inside of him, and nudged his hip. Cas nodded, pressing a kiss to his pec, before pulling out. He disappeared into the bathroom, getting a glass of water and a washcloth. He returned to see Dean smoking.
Cas wiped Dean's abdomen down carefully, making sure he was clean, before moving lower, wiping away the come that had leaked out of him. He cleaned himself off, before tossing the washcloth aside. He offered the water, and Dean drank eagerly, handing the cigarette off.
"Go ahead, and finish it. I'm fine," Dean said, water running down the corner of his mouth.
Cas nodded, taking a long drag. After he exhaled he pressed a soft kiss to Dean's mouth. Dean pushed against his arm, and Cas wrapped it automatically around him, letting Dean settle in the crook of his shoulder. Dean absently doodled patterns against Cas' chest, and they settled in to cuddle for a few minutes, just basking in each other's company.
A few hours later they were both dressed in button downs and jeans, ready to head out for the night. Dean was leaning up against the couch, cigarette in hand, watching Cas tie his shoes.
"I hate shoes. I've just mastered the whole tying them thing."
"Cas, you're nearly 28 years old," Dean said. "I'm not tying your shoes for you. If we're gonna have kids you're gonna have to get a hold of it- they won't tolerate Velcro forever."
"You really want it then? It wasn't just a kink thing?" Cas asked, careful to stay focused on his shoes, knowing the only reason Dean was talking about it was because there was no eye contact involved.
"Well, the sex was really good, but yeah. I think I'm gonna renew my certification. Get clean. Maybe we can move out by Sam and Jess. Adopt some kids in a few years, if you want to. I mean we're gonna end up dead sooner rather than later if we keep this up."
"Alright. I can finish school. I'm alright with moving. Probably make staying clean easier."
"I'm gonna get that tattoo. Symbol of a new start."
Cas dared a glance up as he finished with his shoes, and saw Dean looking right at him. He stood and walked over to Dean, wrapping him in his arms.
"I'm excited. I'm ready to grow up, especially with you. Meg's party can be our last hurrah; we'll tell everyone we're leaving."
"Let's do this, Cas."
Dean put a finger under Cas' chin, coaxing him to look up. Cas did, and Dean kissed him. Cas locked his arms around Dean's neck, losing himself in the kiss, knowing that it was the first kiss in a long line of sober, loving kisses. Dean pulled back a minute later, putting one more quick peck against Cas' lips.
"I'll go grab our coats," Dean said.
He came back out a few minutes later wrapped in his favorite green jacket, and held out Cas' pea coat for him. Cas gladly shrugged into it and buttoned it around himself. The ride to the restaurant was mostly quiet. Dean parked in a garage a few blocks from the place.
They got out of the Impala, and as soon as they were around it's long body Dean intertwined their fingers and held Cas' hand all the way to the restaurant. Cas leaned into him, nudging their hips together, ignoring the nip of the cold.
They got settled at a table quickly enough and drinks were brought over quickly, too– beer for Dean and, against his better judgment, wine for Cas. Wine always made Cas unnecessarily emotional. They ordered things they hadn't heard of and were only half sure of what they were. Cas was on his second glass by the time the food came, and his third by the time dinner was over.
"My family would throw a fit if they knew I was with you."
"Didn't they disown you because you were gay, Cas?" Dean prodded softly.
Cas rarely spoke of his family, and with good reason, Dean knew. They had been shockingly religious, and Cas had come out knowing the consequence for daring to be anything but their version of a good Christian boy. He also knew Cas had been turned away from everyone he had considered a friend after being beaten half to death. Meg had found him on the street and taken him in.
When they had first met Cas had been stupid high nearly all the time, trying to forget the pain he was in and convince himself there was still a God. Dean had kissed him stupid the first time they had been around each other not totally wasted. They'd moved into together a month later, away from Meg's poisonous influence on Cas, and hadn't looked back. Meg remained a friend, but Cas didn't recall his time living with her with much fondness, at least what time of it he could remember.
"Yeah. But I mean with you like this. They thought gay meant a life of debauchery- how I ended up here. Didn't think I could be anything else. They'd die if they knew we had a life, that we were gonna have kids."
"Yeah," Dean said softly.
"God, we're gonna have kids," Cas said too loudly.
"I think it's time we got you home, Cas."
"Haven't you been drinking?"
"I stopped after the first beer."
"Oh. They didn't approve of alcohol consumed outside of church. Didn't approve of much of anything outside church. My uncle Uriel was awful. Said everyone was going to Hell because that's where the world was headed. That God was ashamed of his creations and that was why miracles quit happening. Course I know now that's because God is dead."
Dean paid the check, and supported Cas to the car. He had somehow managed to drain a fourth glass while he was gone.They got back to the apartment, and Dean took Cas' coat. He watched Cas strip and head straight to the bed. He went into the bedroom, and made sure Cas was alright.
"I'm sleepy, Dean," he said.
"You had four glasses of wine. I'm not surprised."
"Anna'd be happy for us. She left too. Don't know what happened. I was too little."
"Maybe we can try to find her," Dean said, not bothering to ask who Anna was.
"Gonna sleep."
"Alright. I'll be in the living room. Gonna watch some TV. Sleep well."
Cas nodded and dozed off. Dean settled in front of the TV with a pack of cigarettes, making a note to try and cut back. The Discovery channel held his attention, and Cas' soft snores from the next room made him certainthey had made the right decision.
A/N: I apologize for the tardiness of it- the worst writer's block of my life combined with real life hit, but this story is flowing now.